Max Steel Omake Theater!
(or, what we don't see on Saturday morning!)
(In mid-scene,
Max races past and grabs Rachel's script)
Rachel: Excuse me for a moment. STEEL! Bring that back NOW!
Max: Make me!
Rachel: (glint in her eyes) You forget I'm
in business clothes now. My shoes have points.
Max: Eep! (hands script back)
Pete: I'm
sorry, was I supposed to be in this scene? I was, um...checking the food table.
(camera pans to show a buxom blonde extra picking at a salad plate)
Pete: Eheh....
Berto:
Okay, so we just reverse the polarity of the--
(WHAP! A net falls over him)
Cat: Don't mind us... (Drags him off screen.)
Laura:
EXCUSE ME! Why does SHE (points at Rachel) get all the scenes with Josh?
I'M his girlfriend!
(script boy comes over, hands her latest revision, points out cast list)
Laura: Dammit. (looks at script boy) You free Friday night?
Kaneda: Five
Ninja Takeout! Somebody order Takoyaki? (stagehand whispers) Whaddaya
MEAN I'm in the wrong fic?
Director:
TAKE TWO! and....ACTION!
Berto: (nervous, looking around) So we just reverse the polarity
and....AHHHHH! (races off screen, chased by horde of screaming girls chanting
"We Love Berto!" "We Wanna Berto Plushie!")
Max: A new
weapon to test? COOL!
(POING!)
Max: A ferret blaster?
Berto: They let Maxy work props.
Max: So
what do you call this again?
Berto: The Mark-5.
Max: What does it do?
Berto: This. (pushes button, robot explodes)
Max: Is it supposed to do that?
Berto: Let me check my notes....
Max: Waitaminute...let me guess, the new writer's a Sluggite.
Berto: What's a Sluggite?
Dragonelle:
Vitriol! That's MY wardrobe!
Vitriol: It is? But I look so good in gold!
Vitriol:
Oh... did I have a line there?
(Psycho rips off one of Vitriol's arms and hits him with it.)
Dread:
Now, I want everyone to play nice. (double-checks script) I demand to
have a talk with the writers.
Psycho: If
I get my butt handed to me one more time in this episode, I'm going to see if I
can't get a job on "Action Man."
Tempest: No way, man! No one's cutting in on my
time with Asazi!
Asazi: Go find yourself a magazine, kid. I wouldn't mind having a real
man around for a change.
Alex and Max: (exchange looks.) EEEEWWWW...
Dr. X: That... is an image I did NOT need.
Asazi: (looks at Dr X) You don't have much
room to criticize.
Bio-Constrictor:
Where'ssss my trailer?
Stagehand: It's the big terrarium at the end of the row.
Jeff: Max,
if you blow up ONE MORE HAWK, you're going on your next mission on a tricycle!
Max: Hey,
when do I get another scene with Rachel? (script handed to him) Hey wait,
since when do we fight in swimsuits?
Flunkie: Here's your wardrobe, Mr. Steel. (hands him a teal speedo
with the N-Tek logo on the butt)
Max: I have to get a better agent.
Rachel: It could be worse, Mr. Steel. (walks
onstage in a teal string thong bikini. N-Tek logo is painted on her thigh)
Max: (squeaking as he sees her) I think it just got worse.
(By the coffee
maker)
Pete: So it doesn't bother you that you're only a bit player?
Marshak: Nope. Trust me, kid, it's safer.
Pete: Safer? You're kidding.
Stagehand: Okay, bring in the defibrillator for the hospital scene.
Marshak: I rest my case.
Stagehand: Yeah, well, Martinez won't come out of his dressing room... mainly because Cat's staked out the door.
Director:
How am I supposed to work like this??
Max: Because you get the biggest paycheck?
Director: Ah, yes. Thank you.
Woody: I
knew they'd ask me back on this show eventually...
Max: What's he here for?
Stagehand: Watch.
(An anvil drops out of the sky)
Max: Fanwriters are VICIOUS.
Vitriol: (looks
up from playing solitaire one-armed) What, is it my line?
Dragonelle:
So, Asazi, a little girl talk... HOW do you get your hair to do that?
Asazi: A little-known secret that's illegal in most
countries.
Berto: So,
we just reverse the polarity and-
BLAM!
Max: Oh, that HAD to hurt.
Director: Okay, Berto! Don't touch anything more
dangerous than your toes!
Berto: No way. Max showed me this strip on the last
break.
Psycho: I think
I'd have better luck doing Shakespeare....
(offstage)
Dread: Personally, I find her tiresome. Enthusiastic, yes, but
tiresome. You're welcome to her.
L'Tranger: Oh no, I wouldn't dream of enchanting her away from
you. You had her first; she's all yours.
Dread: But I don't want her! You can have her!
L'Tranger: Not a chance, John.
Dragonelle: You two sure know how to make a girl feel wanted. I
don't need either of you! (sing-song) Oh, Psycho!!
Psycho: Help! Hide me!
(on the set of Max Steel: The Next
Generation)
Misha: (showing off his new N-Tek jumpsuit) Well, what do you
think?
Aiden: The fit is...um, yeah. Excuse me for a
moment....(grabs suited Misha, drags him off-screen where we hear a loud
commotion)
(after long intermission, a rather rumpled Misha reappears)
Misha: Sorry for the interruption; no one warned me of her attraction
to lycra.
Aiden: Come back! I'm not done yet!
Misha: In the meanwhile, please enjoy this special viewing of Lawrence of
Arabia. (rushes off screen)
Author's Notes: Never trust two sugar-enhanced twentysomethings with wicked senses of humor. We might just create something like this. Ellen and I had a _real_ interesting chat night. :) What all have we referenced? Let's see, the fan community (hi Maxy!), Sluggy Freelance (www.sluggy.com--Worship the Comic. Is it not nifty?), future characters (muuuuch future!), Action Man, Five Ninja Takeout (they deliver anywhere...and they mean anywhere! Check Ellen's page for profiles), Baywatch, in a round about way.... The only things we lay claim to are Aiden, Misha, the Five Ninjas and our twisted senses of humor. Oh, and I stole the term "Omake Theater" from the anime series Blue Seed.