sigh my third fic, second YnM fic. The plot lines not really anything revolutionary but I hope you enjoy this. Be nice if you review but please tell me constructive criticisms. I suck at writing and am trying to improving myself. Also no matter how many chapters you go through and read I don't own this series so this will be my general disclaimer for the whole fic.

Tsuzuki's mind was foggy, but that wasn't unusual. He didn't particularly want to clear it. He was surrounded in darkness, but he wasn't scared of it. No, he had learned it was best to drown in it instead. Now he was trying to do just that, but he could hear voices and despite his reluctance his consciousness was being pulled to the surface.

The final pull came when he clearly heard "Bon, he's going to be okay. He should be waking up anytime now."

Watari had been trying to get an icy Hisoka to eat something, or at least move. Since Tsuzuki had been dragged in here two days ago he had flatly refused to move from his spot. Tsuzuki had been beat up pretty badly, but the wounds had healed quickly and it now seemed that the only reason he probably hadn't regained conscious earlier was due to pure exhaustion. The two of them had been working non-stop for two weeks on their latest case; they had hardly slept.

Hisoka, of course, had been informed several times that Tsuzuki was fine, just exhausted, but paid it no mind, preferring to see for himself that Tsuzuki would be okay. Besides he wanted to be there the moment Tsuzuki woke up so he call him ten kinds of idiot for being so reckless.

He watched attentively and sat up stiffly when he saw Tsuzuki's eyebrows furrow. Tsuzuki's eyes took their time opening and when they did he looked...very un-Tsuzuki like. He was too dazed and inattentive and Hisoka found himself praying that it was the after effect of two days of unconsciousness.

'Ah, so I'm still alive' was the first clear thought Tsuzuki had

Tsuzuki turned his head to look at the two other people in the room. One was sitting in front of him, looking oddly stressed; the other was behind fiddling with some equipment. The room he was in was unrecognizable, but that wasn't odd. He was in a different room every time he woke up.

Tsuzuki was surprised when the boy suddenly grabbed his hand. "Tsuzuki you idiot! What on earth do you think you were doing!" Hisoka scolded, though he was sure that his eyes gave away how relieved he was, besides Tsuzuki had to know that he would be worried about him.

Tsuzuki gave him a puzzled look with matching puzzled feelings, causing a horrible feeling in the pit of his stomach. Something wasn't right, Tsuzuki was acting strange. He normally would have began pouting now because Hisoka was so mean or start teasing him for worrying so much.

"Ah, Tsuzuki you're awake. Good thing too, bon was worried sick!" Tsuzuki just gave Watari a blank look. Watari seemed to sense something was odd but didn't give it much thought. "Do you remember what happened?"

'After I tried to kill my self again?' Tsuzuki decided it best just to shake his head and let the doctor get a kick out of telling him.

Hisoka paled several shades, the close contact allowed him to pull the thought from Tsuzuki's head. What on earth was Tsuzuki thinking all of sudden! This didn't make sense...

"You were brought in two days ago your injuries healed quickly, but you were so exhausted you've been sleeping the whole time."

Wow, two days? That was fast even for him. He was usually out for several months before he regained any sort of consciousness.

Hisoka was still sensing the direction and shape of Tsuzuki's thoughts as well as the occasional clear thought from him but Tsuzuki himself seemed incapable of forming too many. Hisoka tightened his grip on the man's hand, but if Tsuzuki looked at him he didn't know; he was now looking intently at the floor.

"If you need to know anything before that you'd have to ask bon, he was the only one there. The girl is safe though, and that's good." Watari continued casually, after all it was perfectly normal for someone to forget the time they were hurt or even the time directly preceding it. He blamed Tsuzuki's odd demeanor on drowsiness.

His new doctor was just spewing nonsense now (he was his new doctor right?). He was completely sure he was alone when he had tried it, otherwise they would have stopped him from putting the blade to his wrist in the first place.

Watari was about to say something more but was cut off by Hisoka standing abruptly. The way the boy was looking at the floor, one would almost think he was talking to it instead of Tsuzuki. "Tsuzuki, do you know where you are?"

Tsuzuki shook his head

Hisoka didn't seem shocked by this revelation, Watari how ever was. "Tsuzuki, you should know the infirm--"

"Do you know who he is?" Hisoka cut him off.

Tsuzuki was sure it was something in the boy's voice that made him want to give a verbal answer, which was odd as he never spoke with anyone in the hospitals ever. "...No" Tsuzuki found his voice amazingly clear for someone who hadn't used it in eight years.

Watari just froze, confused by what he had just heard. Hisoka balled his fist tightly in his hand, his nails almost breaking the skin. He forced himself to look up and meet Tsuzuki's eyes, but he was unable to see the worry there. He was too consumed with unrest of what seemed to be the inevitable answer to the question he was about to ask to really see anything at all. "Tsuzuki...what about me?" His voice was a scared whisper "Do you know who I am?"

When Tsuzuki answered "no" Hisoka looked down again and fled from the room. This was one of the times when even Tsuzuki wasn't allowed to see him cry.