A/n: I was talking with my good friend Dukoro-nee, and we came up with some pretty creepy situations… here they are…
I Shot… KURENO!
Tohru wandered around, holding her latest copy of Fruits Basket.
"Why do they call it fruits basket?" she wondered, dumbly, aloud.
"Because," because-ed Shiggy-bear. "It is that game where you are called some sort of fruit and when they say 'fruits basket' you all run into each other!" (There goes Shiggy's brain… out the window OO)
Tohru suddenly thought of something mostly intelligent!
"FOOD FIGHT!"
After many confused minutes of hectic food throwing. Shiggy recounted all that had been thrown.
"Yuki's cheese, Kureno wings, Haru's ass, Kagura slices, Chinese food, Akito (for the hell of it) and a plastic fruits basket…"
"So we threw cheese, chicken wings, steak, bacon, cats and dogs, Akito and fruits basket?" Yuki asked, almost as dumbly as Tohru would've asked it.
"Yes, but I wanted to throw Machi!... OUT A WINDOW!" henceforth, Kyo lost it, and threw Machi out the window. Yuki was happy for the rest of the day and danced, like Tohru… wearing Tohru's clothes! OO
Kyo was walking down the street looking for Machi so he could incinerate her… he didn't find her but…
He crashed into her!
He braced for transformation and then remembered he wasn't cursed…
With boys!
Yes, you heard it first, Machi is a GUY!
Anyway, Kyo decided to give HIM a lap dance.
He sat Machi down on a chair, pulled on his cleets, jumped onto Machi's lap and began a riverdance.
That was the last anyone heard from Machi…
At home, Kagura was poking le Shigure's middle.
"Shiggy-bear is middle aged! His age is starting to show about his middle!"
"That just fat!" called Kyo who walked through the door carrying his cleets.
"Yes," yes-ed Tohru. "They always say that a way to a man's heart is through his stomach!"
"Really? I thought it was a way to man's heart was between his third and fourth rib with a knife?" Kagura asked.
"That is if you want to kill him, which is what all women want to do…" Tohru laughed evilly, internally.
That day after school, Tohru told Hana and Uo of her evil plan to kill the male Sohmas'…
That was the day Uo shot… KURENO!
Uo went to Tohru house and yelled… "I SHOT… KURENO!" and then died on the mat…
Kyo had fun raping her dead body and then incinerating it in Machi's gay place…
A/n: Geez, that is a weird story… Hope you liked it…
Happy… reviewing!
TSA