I don't own Chuck. Actually, I don't own much of anything.

I'm not really un-retiring… not yet anyway. This is not new content. In fact, it is almost ten years old.

This is the third of four stories in the Real Relationship arc rewrite.

If you read the originals, the main difference, besides learning grammar (thanks BrickRoad), is Chuck's attitude towards sex. In the original, he was jealous and whiny about Sarah flirting on assignments. That was definitely him when this story was first written. But it turned out that he became more mature. Later in the series, it was actually Sarah who was the most jealous.

Look, I get that interest in things Chuck has waned. That's as it should be. So, while I'd always love to hear from you, I'm not doing this for hits or reviews. I'm doing this for me. Hopefully you can enjoy it as well.

What Did You Say

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Chuck and Sarah arrived at Casey's a few minutes before the briefing was set to begin. Carina and Casey were already waiting in front of the monitor waiting for Washington to come live.

It had been a glorious three weeks, almost too good to be true. It had been magical at almost every level. Professionally, Fulcrum had been dealt a crushing… and probably fatal blow. It was a little too soon to claim total victory. But the information that had been seized was leading Beckman's team to more and more Fulcrum cells. They were falling like dominoes. That had Beckman so comfortable that she agreed to end their stupid cover jobs. Sarah would no longer serve yogurt to fawning teenagers half dressed in that ridiculous uniform that screamed for them to find some excuse to get her to bend over. Chuck and Casey would no longer have to work long shifts in the Buy More. It was like pennies from heaven.

But that paled compared to the personal magic. They had gone from asset and handler, pretending that their cover relationship was all business, to man and wife. They were actually married. It was like a dream come true. They had just spent an unbelievable week in Vegas. It was really hard to tell which one was happier. Chuck was actually married to the woman of his dreams. But if you had to pick, it was probably Sarah's life that had changed the most. She would freely admit that she didn't have a clue how to be a wife. But she was a fast learner… and she was committed to throw herself at any challenge. Being a perfectionist, she was dedicated to becoming the perfect wife. Until then, she'd have to make up her lack of experience with tons of sex. At least, that was her story, and she was sticking to it.

The week in Vegas was probably the only honeymoon they were going to get for a while, so they made the most of it. And while it was incredible, they were both looking forward to getting into the routine of being a married couple. It didn't hurt that Beckman had come through with a furnished apartment for them. Since the only spaces they had ever shared together were hotel rooms, they were both pretty excited as they explored their new home.

But they still had jobs to do. "Come on, Bartowski," Casey growled. "We've been back from Vegas for one day and you've flashed already?"

Chuck was in a pretty good mood. "I assume you meant me," he teased. "Since we're both named Bartowski now."

Actually, they were all in pretty good moods. "Wow," Carina piped in. "What does a flash look like? I'm dying to see one. Does it hurt?"

Sarah shook her head. Of the gang, she was probably the most reluctant to have to end their time off. "If you want to see him flash," she said. "Take him to Guido's. We're three for three. Every freaking time we go there, he flashes. I'm done with the place myself."

Just then Beckman came online. As usual, she got right to business. "Good afternoon," she began. "Mr. Bartowski, the man you flashed on at lunch today is Frank Goode. He owns a chain of gentleman's clubs across California." Beckman put his picture up on the split screen. "He is also heavily suspected to be connected to organized crime. Most specifically, prostitution, human trafficking, and cocaine distribution."

Carina was happy. She was the newbie on the team. At least her DEA experience would come in handy and allow her to make a contribution right away. "Yes, ma'am," she said. "I've heard of him… a major cocaine player. I've never heard of the human trafficking. But that's not unusual for these scumbags. He's very connected. We've never been able to lay on glove on him."

"He is very connected," Beckman agreed. "That's part of the problem. His headquarters club is in Los Angeles very close to the port area. We feel that Goode is using it as a gateway. Somehow he is smuggling the cocaine in through the port and using his clubs as distribution points. We would like your team to find out how he is doing this."

"Yes, ma'am," Casey replied.

"Mr. Bartowski," Beckman said. "Since you two are married now, Agent Walker has requested that we get your approval any time that we ask her to go undercover."

Chuck was honestly impressed. Beckman didn't ask… she gave orders. "Thank you, ma'am," he said.

"We would like agents Miller and Walker to go undercover as dancers in the club," Beckman said. "Hopefully they can get on the inside and find out what his protection is. We would want Casey and you to pose as regular patrons to cover them. Would you have a problem with that?"

Chuck considered the question. He wanted to correct her. She wasn't Agent Walker any more. But this wasn't the time. What she was asking didn't seem so bad. And to refuse the first request would be awkward. "All she would have to do is dance?" he asked. "No prostitution stuff, right, ma'am?"

"Of course," replied Beckman. "Agent Walker has made her position on that kind of activity well known."

"I guess that would be okay, ma'am," Chuck said. He looked over at Sarah for reassurance. She was looking at him with a questioning expression.

Beckman didn't give them any time to discuss things. "Excellent," she said. "Well you have your orders. Dismissed."

As soon as the screen turned blank, Sarah turned to Chuck with her mouth hanging open. "Chuck," she said. The surprise in her voice was very plain. "I can't believe that you just agreed to that."

"What?" Chuck asked. "It's just dancing. You're a great dancer. I love watching you dance. What's the big deal?"

Casey was grinning. "You do understand that she'll be topless?" he asked. "Right, genius?"

Chuck was sure that he was teasing. "Right," he scoffed. "Good one." He looked at Casey and Carina. They were laughing so hard that they had to support each other to keep from falling. "Come on guys," he protested. "This is a gentleman's club, not a strip club." He turned to Sarah. "Hey, Mrs. Bartowski, maybe you could wear the new bikini you bought in Vegas."

"Yeah," Carina said, struggling to get the words out between laughing. "But only half of it."

This sent Casey and Carina into another laughing fit.

Sarah wasn't laughing. "Chuck," she said. "Haven't you ever been in one of those gentleman's clubs before? The women dance topless."

It took a long moment for Chuck to get what she was saying. Then the color left his face. "What?" he exclaimed. "Oh, hell no. Call Beckman back right now and tell her to forget it."

Casey was trying in vain to wipe the tears from his eyes. "We can't," he said. "She's already issued the order. What in the hell were you thinking anyway?"

Chuck shook his head in frustration. "Oh hell no," he sighed. "Sarah, please tell me that there is some way out of this."

Sarah shrugged her shoulders. "Chuck," she said softly. "We don't have much choice. We told Beckman that you would have to agree every time I went undercover. You told her that you agreed. She's already making the arrangements for the assignment. What can we do?"

"Oh hell no," Chuck sighed.

Carina was confused. "How is this different than the other night?" she asked. "Sarah danced and took off her clothes in front of that gang of Fulcrum dudes. That didn't bother you. She was more naked then than she will be in that club. Come on. This is what we do. This is how female agents work. It's just not that big of a deal."

"It's different," Chuck insisted. "The other night was Fulcrum. We didn't have much choice. We agreed that she would be putting on the show only for me. I promised that I would support her when it was necessary… and I will. I guess I just don't understand. You're willing to take your clothes off in front of a bunch of horny drunk men? And that's no big deal?"

Carina stopped laughing and studied him for a moment. "Chuck," she replied softly. "I just spent ten years in the DEA. They call it human trafficking. It doesn't sound so bad when you say it like that. But let's get in the car and I'll take you for a ten minute drive. I'll show you a line of fifteen year old girls trying to sell themselves to make enough money to buy their next hit of crack. Yeah, it's not Fulcrum. But it's still a war of good vs. evil. These jerks get those girls hooked and then exploit them, in the most evil ways. The sex is the least of it. We have a decent chance to bust these bastards. It's a good thing for the world. If the worst thing that happens is that I have to do is show some men my chest, I'm very happy."

"But how can you?" Chuck asked. "Don't you think it's demeaning?"

Carina grinned. "Look at me," she said. She pulled her shirt and bra up over her head in one fluid motion and dropped them to the floor. "It's really pretty easy."

Chuck looked at her standing there posing. He turned to Casey incredulously. "And you're okay with this?" he asked.

Casey smiled. "Come on, Chuck," he said. "It's her job. You have to be able to separate Sarah the agent from Sarah your wife. Of course, this is not my ideal assignment. It's not hers either. But it needs to be done. That's our duty."

Chuck wasn't convinced. He turned to Sarah. "And you're okay?" he asked. "You're okay with me standing here looking at Carina's chest? I thought you were jealous."

"Let me ask you something," Sarah said. "When you just saw Carina's chest, how did it make you feel?"

Chuck simply looked at Sarah. "I don't know what you want me to say," he said.

"I know," Sarah said with a grin. "You're looking for the husband trap. I'm not trying to trap you here. I promise. I'm trying to make a point. Forget I'm your wife for a second. She's a beautiful woman. This isn't the first time you've seen her topless. Are you hugely turned on right now? Do you want to take Carina in the bedroom and ravage her or something like that?"

Chuck shook his head. "Of course not," he replied. "For one thing, I don't want to forget that you're my wife… not for a second. But to answer your question, if anything, I'm sort of embarrassed."

How sweet was that? "And how about Carina?" Sarah continued. "She's standing there pointing her boobs at you. Do you think she is coming on to you?"

Chuck sighed. "One can never tell with Carina," he said. "But no, probably not."

"Carina's your friend," Sarah said. "Do you feel any differently about her now that you've seen her boobs… for the second and, given her history, probably not the last time?"

Chuck shook his head. "Not really," he said.

Sarah smiled. "That's exactly why I'm not jealous," she said. "This isn't a sexual experience at all. Now if Carina was alone with you. If she was showing you her chest to seduce you; that would be totally different, wouldn't it? Talk about jealous. I'd be kicking her ass around the room right now, and she knows it."

"Okay," Chuck said. "I understand. But Sarah how about you? You mean you could do that?"

Sarah reached for the hem of her shirt. Quickly enough it was on the floor next to Carina's. Her bra quickly followed. "I've been trained," Sarah answered. "Just like I can fight. Just like I can throw a knife. Just like I can do a lot of things. Men seeing me without clothes doesn't bother me at all. What is the issue? They really aren't getting anything from me. It's just skin. It's the same thing they would see if we went to the beach in Rio. Trust me on something. If you were modest when you enter the CIA Academy, you sure as hell aren't when you graduate."

"But I haven't been trained," Chuck sighed. "I get that this isn't the first time someone has seen you naked. It won't be the last. But this situation is totally different for me. In Vegas you were in control. That's not true here. You're not playing a mark. I won't always be there. You won't be putting on a show just for me. You're entertaining other men with your body. I just can't stand the thought of a bunch of horny drunk men lusting after my wife. Call me old fashioned but the only person that I want staring at your naked chest is me."

Sarah sided into him. "I know," she said. "Chuck, I agree that it is a little different. I won't have as much control as I'd like. You have every right to protest. I don't have a right to ask you to accept this. I was surprised when you agreed. There is not a single thing wrong with the way you're feeling. It's sweet. It's one of the reasons why I love you."

Casey spoke up. "I've got news for you, Bartowski," he said. "There are horny men lusting after Sarah every day that she walks down the street… fully clothed. She's beautiful. That's just the price of being with such a beautiful woman."

"I get that," Chuck sighed. "I'm usually proud of it. This is just different."

Carina smiled at him. "I have an idea," she said. "Since Chuck has never been to one of these clubs before, let's all go to one tonight. Not the one that we're targeting, of course. I mean, if Chuck's cover is going to be a regular at the club, he better have at least seen the inside of one."

"That's a good idea," Casey agreed. "I mean, he'd better know how to order a lap dance."

"Lap dance?" Chuck moaned.

"Oh hell no."

x-x-x-x-x

It had been a pretty silent drive back to their new apartment. As soon as they were inside, Sarah was trying to console Chuck. She put her head on his shoulder. "Come on, sweetie," she sighed. "Cheer up. I promise. It won't be that bad."

"Not that bad?" Chuck asked incredulously. "How can you say that? I have two words for you… lap dance. Any horny dude with twenty bucks in his pocket gets one from you. This assignment could take weeks."

Sarah looked at him for a long moment. He had a point. Taking off your clothes was one thing. Rubbing your naked body against some stranger while sitting on his lap for twenty bucks was probably across even her line. "I'm not saying it's good," she said. "You're right. It is a lot different. I wasn't looking at it from your perspective. I have to get better at that. But you have to understand something too. Right now if I gave you a lap dance, it would turn you on, right?"

Chuck looked at her like she had grown a third eye. "Of course," he said. "Even thinking about it turns me on."

Sarah smiled. That was sweet. Thinking about it was exciting for her too. She was half tempted to prove it right now. But she had a serious point to make. "And it would turn me on," she said. "It would turn me on that it turned you on. It already has. And I would predict that about half way through, we would hit the bed for some very hot sex, right?"

Chuck nodded his head. Sex with Sarah had always been out of this world. Since Vegas, their sex had become white hot. Sarah was obviously more comfortable and she had hit another gear, a truly wonderful one.

"At the club that won't happen," Sarah continued. "The men might get turned on at the club. But I won't be. I'll be secretly snickering at them. They're mostly pathetic. It won't lead to any sex. It won't be sexual at all. Understand the difference now?"

Chuck grinned. "Here hot sex, there pathetic losers walking around with hard-ons and twenty less dollars in their pants."

Sarah breathed a big sigh of relief. That he was willing to tease her about this was a very good sign. "I think you got it," she said. "Look, Chuck. This is important to me. This is what I do. It's even more important to Carina because it's where she's lived for the past ten years. We have a chance to bust some very, very bad people. But nothing is more important to me than you being okay. I get that you've had to put up with too many things already. The fact is, you've been perfect. I suck at telling you how proud that I am of you. I also get that this situation is different. There will be times when you're not there. To get on the inside, I'm probably going to have to flirt my way there in private. We're probably going to have to put up with a ton of innuendo and a few wandering hands. But, sweetie, this really has nothing to do with us or our relationship. Nothing that happens at that club can change how I feel about you. You're going to be the love of my life when I walk into that club, when I walk out of it, or if I don't go at all. You believe that, don't you?"

"Yes," Chuck said. "Of course."

Sarah grinned. "And I'm confident that watching me take some clothes off won't change the way you feel about me. But you have veto power. If you say no, it's no. So this is the only thing I'm going to ask you. Will you at least go with us tonight with an open mind? Who knows, maybe you'll have a good time. We can make it a game. It'll be like you parading me around those clubs in Vegas half dressed. You enjoyed that."

Chuck shook his head. "It's not exactly like that," he protested. "But okay, I'll try and keep an open mind."

Sarah threw her arms around Chuck's neck and squeezed. "Thank you, sweetie," she said. "It's all that I ask."

Chuck put his arms around her waist. "You haven't heard my price yet," he protested. "I think that it's important that we test your theory of a lap dance leading to hot sex, don't you?"

Sarah could hardly believe her ears. Did Chuck actually just ask her for a lap dance? That was great news. It would be a first. He was growing more comfortable. She suddenly found that her knees were weak. What was it about this man that could instantly get her so hot? "I don't know," she teased. "Are you good for the twenty bucks?"

Of course, Chuck could feel her arousal poking into his chest. She wasn't fooling anybody. She wanted this far more than he did. Gloating about it probably wasn't his finest moment. "Let's be honest," he said. "You'd gladly pay me twenty bucks." He fumbled with his phone and some music started playing. "If we're going to make this a true test, you'd strip for me first."

Sarah grinned. Unless she could learn to control it, he'd always be able to tell when she was on fire. Then again, why was that a bad thing? She had the twenty bucks… times about a million. So she reached up to kiss him, then broke the embrace and started swaying to his music.

"Absolutely."

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