Tranquil
Orsino felt absolutely nothing.
There was nothing wrong with that, of course. Passing his days this way could not exactly be called contentment but it certainly was not unpleasant. The duties he performed on a daily basis were mostly the same, managing paperwork, reading books and writing magical theses on the research he did. He remembered distinctly that he had always hated the tedious record keeping that his position as First Enchanter had necessitated. Now, with the loss of his position and his connection to the Fade, he had all the same paperwork but he did not hate it at all. It was there. Why not do it?
Likewise, he did not enjoy reading books anymore but he could still find them remotely interesting. He had always possessed a fierce lust for more knowledge and he remembered that too. It was easier to continue his old habit of rapidly consuming literature. He preferred it to paperwork, at any rate, if he really had to state a preference. Reading was better than paperwork, paperwork was better than nothing and nothing was so much better than helpless hatred.
"Orsino, I am sexually interested in you," one of the other Tranquil informed him impassively within the quarters shared by those cut off from the Fade. "Would you care to fornicate with me?"
The elf glanced up from his paperwork, eyeing the mage woman standing over his desk. She was human and slender, her breasts forming luscious curves beneath her robes. Her skin was slightly tanned from too much time in the Gallow's courtyard. Her hair was black, falling to her shoulders in loose ringlets.
"I possess no interest for you," Orsino replied simply, looking back to his reading.
"Very well," she said indifferently and walked off.
Amongst the Tranquil, the only things that could truly stir reaction was pain and pleasure. If they did not mind their duties and their health as was important, they were beaten. If they completed their work in a timely fashion, they were allowed to fornicate with others of their kind. The Tranquil were not allowed to sleep with anyone who was not Tranquil. Orsino could recite the moral reasons behind this backwards and forwards but for the life of him, he could not feel any passion about it now. He knew that some Tranquil did sleep with various templars and mages, seldom at their own behest- and if he cared, he might have asked his soulless companions about it. He did not care however.
The only thing that struck him as unpleasant was that none of the Tranquil women remotely appealed to him.
There were ugly ones and pretty ones, old ones and young ones, slender ones and curvy ones but none of them interested him. Orsino did want pleasure as obviously, there was nothing else for him to want. Nevertheless, he could not be satisfied with what was offered. Even that human woman in the corner with blond hair, blue eyes and pale skin fell short of some incredibly important standard. He expelled a short sigh. What was the point?
Several hours passed and a young templar knight slipped into the room, approaching Orsino's desk. "You have been summoned, Orsino," he said, grinning widely at the Tranquil mage. "Come with me."
It was not unusual for Tranquil to be herded here and there. Sometimes their abilities were needed in different areas. Orsino rose indifferently and followed the knight. He was led to a small office and told to enter. The young knight turned and left.
Inside, Knight-Commander Meredith sat at her desk with plenty of paperwork of her own. Orsino knew the room well since the office across the hallway had once been his. He remembered the arguments the two of them had indulged in, screaming fits across the hallway or rapidly hissed retorts in one of the offices. He remembered being furious, desperate and scared. He remembered loathing Meredith until she was all he could think about, the only existence he even acknowledged in an endless blur of faces.
None of it mattered now. He saw her and he thought what he had always thought, sans the burden of emotions.
"Good evening, Knight-Commander," he said tonelessly. "You look beautiful."
Her eyes snapped up from her paperwork, an incredulous look on her face. "Who instructed you to spew out compliments?" she demanded flatly. She expelled a short sigh. "No matter. Come closer. Sit down."
He obeyed, seating himself in a chair before her desk and studying her. She seemed more tired than usual, no matter how impeccable her armor and posture. Dark circles rimmed her slightly red eyes and her mouth was pressed into a thin line. Her hair was still golden and fine however, the fair color gently reflecting the light from the braziers behind her. She did not look at him, dipping her quill in a pot of ink and scribbling away at her paper.
"You have been Tranquil for two weeks, Orsino," she began, her voice taut. "Do you have any complaints?"
"Nothing important, Knight Commander," he replied. "Being Tranquil is very peaceful."
"So the name would imply," she said edgily. She wrote a few more sentences before setting down her quill with a click against the desk. She met his empty gaze, her blue eyes glassy and distant. "I killed a child today," she informed him. "A ten year old blood mage. He had learned from his mother, a maleficar apostate. The knight-lieutenant who was with me suggested rehabilitation but I am of the opinion that those who are tainted young will never truly recover. I couldn't have him corrupting the Circle mages."
"You do your duty well, Knight Commander," Orsino praised her without inflection, deciding that she had very elegant eyebrows. Did she pluck stray strands from them in the mornings to make them so neat? Not that it mattered one way or another.
A raw emotion passed briefly over Meredith's face at his words but it disappeared quickly. She sucked in a slow breath. "Of course. You don't care at all now, do you?" she murmured.
"The Rite of Tranquility has relieved me of emotion, Knight Commander," he reminded her. "Based on my memories, I can infer that this conversation would have greatly upset me otherwise."
"Yes," she said softly. "Perhaps you would have convinced me the boy could be saved. First Enchanter Faer barely tried; she is too old and afraid to oppose my decisions. You were afraid too but none of that mattered when a child was in danger. Perhaps…perhaps if you had promised to redeem the child, I would have believed it."
Her blond strands of hair looked soft, shockingly soft when compared to the unyielding steel of her plate mail. When she was done talking to him, she would send him back to that room full of unattractive women and books. Since he could not be embarrassed or afraid, he decided to speak on impulse. "May I touch your hair, Knight Commander?" he asked.
"What?" she asked sharply, clearly baffled.
He repeated himself. "May I touch your hair, Knight Commander?"
"Who told you to say that?" There was anger in her voice now.
"No one," he answered.
"Tell me the truth or I will strike you!" she threatened.
"I was given no instruction on what to say to you," Orsino said honestly.
She stared at him for a long moment before the energy just drained out of her. Her shoulders slumped and she pinched the bridge of her nose between two fingers. "Then why, Maker why, do you want to touch my hair? A Tranquil should not want anything."
"It looks soft," he told her, his voice still monotonous.
Her blue eyes were glassy again. "Alright," she said. "You can touch it."
"Thank you, Knight Commander," he said, standing from his chair and circling the desk to her. Carefully, he pulled down her red hood and gathered her shining blond hair behind her neck. The color was so bright and warm that it seemed as though sunlight had escaped the purge of dusk to place its rays down upon Meredith's head. Her hair was as soft as it looked and Orsino ran his long fingers through it, finding more pleasure in this simple action than he could possibly have found in sleeping with the other Tranquil.
Meredith laid her head down upon her desk as he gently caressed her scalp. A choked sound tore from her throat, something rough and anguished.
He could not see how he might have hurt her so he jumped to the next most likely explanation. "Are you ill, Knight Commander?" he inquired.
"No, Orsino," she breathed out, "I have never been better. The most dangerous mage in the Gallows is a mage no more and there is nothing left to stop me from keeping Kirkwall safe. That is why I decided to make you Tranquil. Am I not a logical and righteous servant of the Maker?"
"Of course you are, Meredith," he assured her. He preferred to say her name over her title even if his demotion made familiarity improper. So long as she did not scold him for it, he would use her name, he decided. He continued to stroke her hair, hoping that she would never tell him to stop.
For a long time, neither of them spoke though Meredith's shoulders shook and she did not raise her head from the desk. All was silent in the little office.
"I have heard…rumors, here and there," she told him at last, sounding so tired and old. "Trifling things. You always cared more than I do- Andraste, more than the Tranquil themselves do- if they are abused. Still…well. How do I motivate you?" She inhaled slowly, sitting back up and passing the back of her hand over her face. "If someone attempts to press you into doing them sexual favors, Orsino, you must come tell me their name and what occurred. If you do that for me, I will buy you lemon cakes from High Town."
"Thank you, Knight Commander," Orsino said. "I prefer lemon cakes over most other food."
"I know," she said, standing up and tucking her hair back into her hood. She did not look at him. "Please leave me now. Emotions are a burden you are so very lucky to be rid of."
He looked at her pale, tearstained face and could only agree.
Orsino felt nothing and he preferred it that way.
(A/N Let me just say this; the Meredith/Orsino stories on are COMPLETE CRAP. Hot-tempered, compassionate, subversive Orsino is portrayed as a cowardly fool who gets raped all the time. Ha, you think he doesn't poison templars when he can get away with it? Zealous, righteous, broken Meredith is portrayed as an amoral egomaniac who enjoys her job. Ha! Didn't anyone listen to her back story? *facepalm* I wrote this to portray them correctly, with the popular scenario of Orsino being turned Tranquil. This is the Meredith who watched her baby sister slaughter seventy innocent people. This is the Orsino who went mad watching young apprentices die over and over, unable to save them- but he TRIED.)