desperation
I'm supposedly the luckiest and happiest girl alive. I didn't grow up on the streets, and didn't have to pick pockets for money. No, I had everything handed to me. Nothing to worry about.
Sure I'm wealthy, but that doesn't mean I have everything I've ever wanted. I don't have my mother, and I definitely don't have you.
How are you by the way? Happy? I hope so. I gave up everything so that you would be. I would hate for that to go to waste. I know it's been quite a while, but there are a couple of things I never had the guts to say to your face.
No woman deserves to watch their boyfriend fall in love with someone else right in front of them the way I did.
No woman deserves to see the way their boyfriend looks at another girl they way I did.
I didn't deserve to see that Mako.
No one does.
When we started dating all I wanted was someone who could fill the void, and make me forget how much I was hurting. Someone who could make me forget how much I miss my mom.
Someone who would love me, and care for me.
I honestly thought you were that person.
Crazy how assumptions turn out right?
I was left broken hearted with open and vulnerable wounds while yours healed so fast.
It was like it didn't even effect you, our ended relationship.
I guess not.
I might have not been the smartest person in the world, but I also wasn't stupid. It wasn't rocket science, it was more like common sense.
I saw the way you and Korra looked at each other, with so much want in your eyes.
And honestly, it wasn't the best thing to know that you were in love with someone else, and it wasn't heart warming to see you light up when she walked into the room either.
I loved you too much, and I'd just rather you be happy with Korra, then be miserable with me.
So I let you.
And when I left you, I left the rest of me with you.
I hate to admit it, but you really screwed me up.
I felt that if you didn't love me, no one could.
It irritates me because all of these insecurities came out of nowhere.
I'm Asami Sato. I'm a badass.
But I'm the one still here pouring my heart out to a guy that moved on.
Why might you ask?
Because I'm desperate.
I'm desperate for you to want me again. For you look at me the way you look at her.
Tell me Mako, am I too ugly? Am I fat?
Am I just not good enough?
TELL ME!
I'm sorry.
I'm being pushy.
I'm a mess.
I'm sorry I didn't come to your wedding.
I just didn't see how I could be happy watching you join hands in marriage with someone else.
I wasn't going to stand there and just watch it.
In the end, I wish I could say that you don't need to show me any pity. That it's been five years, and that I'm over it.
I wish I could say I found someone who will actually treat me right, and that I don't have to waste my tears on you anymore.
I wish I could say I don't have to think about what I did wrong anymore.
I wish I could say that you're happy without me, and I'm happy without you.
But I cant.
I'm desperate for a wish.