A/N: This is a little One Shot/Drabble for .31 After I PM'd her about her review of No More, we began discussing Hermione pairings, and this little (slightly spazzy) piece of literature was born! Hermione is slightly OOC, but it is kind of a song fic to Cell Block Tango from Chicago! Please enjoy! (P.S., it's not brilliant, but that's what you get when you try a song fic for the first time!)...

Oh, and when I say song fic, I mean it has a chorus, and that's it...

I watched Harry grumble as he headed downstairs to his detention with Snape, when all of a sudden a little first-year ran up to him.

"Harry Potter! I've got an urgent message for you!" he squeaked. I swear, when we were younger, we were no where near as annoying as this lot!

"What is it?" Harry said, slightly annoyed at being stopped by this little kid.

"Umm... He said that..." The midget began.

"Spit it out! I have a detention to go to!" Harry was agitated already, and the first-year wasn't helping.

"Harry!" I scolded, whilst pretending to read my book. Harry blanked me, and continued to stare at the small child.

"He-said-that-he-is-going-to-talk-to-Professor-Snape-and-that-your-detention-is-with-Filch-in-the-library!" He squeaked, never once drawing breath.

"Great! That's all I need!" Harry shouted, and stormed out of the common room. The first year burst into tears, and ran from the room. I sighed. I mean,

He had it coming, he had it coming

He only had himself to blame

If you'd have been there, if you'd have seen it

I betcha you would have done the same

I was walking down to Potions, chatting with Parvati. We were discussing Lavender's love life, and when we turned around the corner, who did we see? Only Lavender full on snogging her new squeeze right outside Professor Snape's classroom. So I said to her, I said: "If you don't stop snogging that boy, Snape is going to put you both in detention!" But did that stop them? What do you think?

Then Harry walks over. He gives Parvati this real serious look, and she mutters something about her sister. So I just stood there like a lemon, waiting for Snape to come and yell at someone for something when Harry just went:

"So, Herman. The next Hogsmeade trip is coming up. Want to grab a Butterbeer whilst we're there?"

"What did I tell you about calling me that?" I asked, not bothering to adress the question.

"Sorry, Hermione. Do you want to come with me for a drink or something next time we go to Hogsmeade?"

"Erm..." I began. Luckily, someone else came over to us, and I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Potter, finally found the courage to ask out Granger?" came a snide voice from behind us. It was Malfoy "On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being ugly and 0 being pretty, she is definitely an 8. An 8.5 . Not over a 9.8 ." I blushed. Was Draco Malfoy complimenting me?! "She doesn't need to have anyone like you, when there are higher calibre of wizards like me. I mean, I would save myself for a 10, because I'm worth it, but there aren't any of them left." Harry glared at Draco, whilst I continued to blush. People were beginning to look over at us now. It wasn't very often that Hermione Granger had a boy arguing about her, let alone two of them!

"So, Granger, how about it? Butterbeers for two in Hogsmeade?" Draco asked, a smug look on his face.

"No, Malfoy, she wants to go with me!" Harry protested. Lavender had stopped the snog fest, which shows how interesting everything had become. I noticed a tuft of red hair, and I blushed even more. When I looked back at the squabbling boys, they had drawn their wands.

"Reducto!"

"Expelliarmus!"

Draco's wand went flying across the corridor, just as Snape's door burst open.

"Mr Potter and Mr Malfoy, no duelling in the corridors. 20 points from Gryffindor, 10 points from Slytherin" he drawled.

"But, Professor! That's hardly fair!" I stated.

"Miss Granger, see me after class."

"But-"

"I don't want to hear anymore. Everyone inside, now!"

I didn't say anything else for the lesson, and ignored the pleading looks from Draco and Harry.

"Miss Granger, I must confess myself... rather pleased" I looked up at Snape, and saw a slightly leery expression on his face. I didn't like it one bit.

"Why, sir?" I asked, beginning to feel uncomfortable.

"Because you turned down two very handsome young men! Maybe now I have a shot at you" he said, giving an attempt at a hair flip.

"Umm, sir, I just remembered that I have to... um... speak to Professor McGonagoll..." I said, and began to walk away.

"Fine, but remember that I will always be here for you" he smiled, which was a terrifying experience anyway. And with that, I began walking even faster. "And tell Potter and Draco that they have detention with me tonight as well". I nodded, and left the room, told the boys the message, and the answer no, and swiftly walked up to the Gryffindor common room, and the comfiest chair there was.

Which brings us back to now. Harry was sulking, and in detention. I had sent an owl to Dumbledore, telling him about Snape. And the tuft of red hair was walking over to me.

"So, would you care to tell me what was going on today?" He said.

"Well, to put it simply: I was asked out by my best friend, my worst enemy and a really creepy teacher. Snape is probably going to be reported to the Ministry, and I don't think Harry likes me a lot anymore, as I just got him put in detention."

"A good day had by all then!" He grinned, getting closer to me.

"And this, George Weasley, is why I love you!" And then we kissed...

A/N: So I think that was kind of crappy, but I'm definitely not a fan of Hermione and Snape pairings, but still... What do you think? I hope that .31 enjoyed it! xxxxx Doodley Starkid