Spoot: I know what I'm doing!

Duo: YAAAAAY!

Girls Dont Cry!

Not really what you think. is it...hes there...and I'm here...not there...no, not there...I wanted to be there! I looked over at him he was reading a book. that god damned book, that sat between us and love...I was Feaning for him I wanted his touch. I wanted to hold him tight as we dance slowly through the house. like we always used to. Was I mad. or was he? I forgot to ask him that when we met all those years ago. I beg and plead to love him. wish and hope. I just want to turn on that charm and sit in his lap and sing to him softly. that usta make him go crazy and grab my brest in such a manner that would make any other women blush and ask for release...but not me. I would kill to dry hump him. What did I need to walk away from him. he was easy...or so I thought, but I think I'm addicted. I'm a real women, not one of them bitches that just want sex and to look pretty, I wanted to get down and dirty. I would do anything for him. I was his little Bar girl. not scared to get my hands dirty, at the bar, in the bed, on a drive out to the country for some fun. I wanted him so bad. so bad, I squerm in my chair. He looked up at me. well, half looked up from his book. "What'tcha wigglin for?" he asked me. I look away from him. god damn that man...

"Hilde...dont tell me whe're gunna do this again!" he said tossing that fucking book on the coffee table. "Do what?" I ask, trying to look cute, Like Relena had showed me. "you know what." he said. he manoverd himself on the sofa so he could look at me. I never cared for love. its mush, bull shit, that I dont need...but, when I look at him...he understood real love...I know he does. with the way he talks to me sometimes...

"You, pretending to be mad at me. bull shit Hilde, you're not like that...you need to quit talking to Dorothy and shit!" I jump up. "HEY! you trying to tell me I can't hang with them?" I say. he just chuckled and grabbed his book. "Shut up." he said. There was a reason I hated him...he didnt let me get away with anything...and I hated that! I want him to let a few things go, but nope...I know, I probable need a good ass whoooping, but damn! DAMN HIM! "Dont you tell me to shut up! dont you talk to me that way!" I say. pick a fight girl! make him want it! he looked over at me one last time. "Shut...up." he said simply. dont fucking challenge me...

"Hey!" I shout. "HEY! look at me!" he refused my demand. "DUO!" I shout! I pick something up off the coffee table. ash tray. "you better listen to me!"

"Or what?" he said with a chuckle. I hurl it at the wall. he jumps, almost comic. "ah'HEY!" he shouts. "you're really tryn' ta' kill me arnt'cha!"

"You will listen to me! I will not be ignored!"

he looked me up and down. undressing me with them big violet, violent eyes...I looke away...DAMN HIM! "you wanna do it?" he said and when I look over at him in anger, he just crackles. "you do dont you! thats why you're picking this fight!"

"you're an ass hole!" I say. I feel bad for him, I'm out of control, alot. but he hangs on. he just loves me...thats all he knows how to do, well, that and...piss me off.

"NO!" I shout. "thats not what this is, it you fucking ignoring me."

"When did I do that?"

"Just now!"

"A moment ago, because you're being a bitch!"

he said sitting down again, grabbing that book, I rush him and grab it from him. I hold it high. "I'm a bitch hum...hmmm? a bitch! I got'cha bitch!" I say leaving the room. "Helde! Thats mine!"

"CRY ABOUT IT!" I yell down the hall. I was making my way to the bathroom. he followed. I fought him at the door. I dropped the book in the toilet. "AWWW! What the hell!" he shouted as he hit his knees in front of the toilet. I hurt myself for hurting him... He looked up at me. "Tell me I'm wrong?" I say. hiding my pain. just hold me! "you're wrong..." he said taking the soaked book from the crapper. he stood up and left the room. "ITS A FUCKING BOOK!" I yell. I rush after him. "I'M REAL! ME!" "Still, and stop yelling."

"What do you want me to do?"

"Well, instead of tossing a good book in the pot, you could talk to me."

bastard

"I never know what to say."

he looked up. to meet my eyes.

"Start by telling me whats wrong."

"you!" I almost shout.

"Ok..." he said making his way to the sofa.

"What did I do?"

"you know."

"Dont do that girl shit, thats not you. now...what did I do?"

you dont pay any attention to me, or maybe he did...maybe it was always me. but why would I admit that, fuck my life. I never admit it...thats all me...never taking the blame, can never be wrong...never let go...never cry...never let him help me. but I just wanted to be with him, just to be me with him. even though he allowed that...I couldnt...

"Hilde?" I look up, where the hell did I go. I was killing him. "Sorry...I dont wanna do this any more..." I say. he sat up some. shocked I'm sure.

"I dont wanna be a murderer." I say...

"I just wanna sit next to you."

"So do it." he said, hah! it was simple! hahaha!

"No...not like that. not like this..." I say, and for once I had no idea what I was trying to get at.

"What are you saying...and please..." he got up. I had a feeling I was obsessed with him. he walked over to me and put his arms around me. S.O.S! "Please, dont say you're taking off...ok, I cant take that. dont leave me." Why was it he could be more open with me then I could with him, who the hell was the guy and who was the girl! I give in and go limp agents him. I breathe him in deep. "I'm not." I say. god...his smell was intoxicating. "Then whats wrong? where you going?"

"Dont know..." I say. I was lost in his smell and his touch. I couldnt think right. I felt him, and nothing more. other than weak. "You know I love you."

"Dont get mushy." I say. he giggles. "well, its true." he said softly in my hair. "let it go..."

I feel myslef go even more limp. I wanted to fall asleep right there. could have something to do with the fact that I didnt sleep last night, I was scared to climb in bed with him. to scared to touch him, to scared to wake him up. now, not so much scared of him, but of me... and what was going on. I wasnt on gard...I was losing it...but wasent that what a girl was ment to do, fall into her mans arms, and let him rescue her. big girls dont cry...right...well give me a blanket and a Binky...

"Shhh, I got you...remember that." he said as he breathed in some of my hair.

"Baby, fall." he said. and I let them go. I just...sliped...I needed a "no cry" sponcer. someone to call up on a long night of being alone listening to god damnd Christina Agulera, curled in a ball on my bed about to break down. someone to call and be like. 'yeah, I cant take it man, I'm gunna slip, gunna do it man!' god...I needed him when this happens...no, I mean...no...I do...I do...I wished I could let him in on one of those nights...I was addicted to him, just one more thing...

"What do I do?" I ask. shocked I could speak. I only realized I had said it when my lips moved.

he reached down and placed a hand on my chin, he lifted my head. I was looking him dead in the eye...oh no...

He kissed me lightly. "Dont cry..." he said kissing the tears away. What the hell was going on? my head begun to spin. was I even still here...

"Please. I know you need me, you dont need to say a word, I'm here. you dont need to talk. I know you dont like to tell me what you want, I should just know. well, I do...I do know. sometimes, I let you do what you want, and indulge you, by calling you names, and helping the fight allong."

he giggled some, making me do the same.

"and then I'm here to catch you when you need to fall. I want you to fall, ok...when you want, when you're ready." how did I get so lucky?

I snuggle up to him and smile. "'kay." Isay softly. he picked me up I nearly squealed. he laughed. "Come on. you need some sleep babe..." how did he know?

he carried me to the room, and, playfully, tossed me on the bed. her laughed. "Now strip!" he said. "Shut up." I say softly as I snuggle up with his pillow. "Gunna need that later." he said. I nod. I loved his pillow. I hoped he wouldnt take it back. I reach out and grab his hand before he left the room. "Where-" I start. "I'll be back, I need to shit, or something...I dont know, my tummys acting funny today." I felt bad...I had him all worked up, and had no idea how he was really feeling. "Dont worry, I'll be back to tuck you in and tell you a story." I smile. "Dont forget to check the closet and under the bed." I say. he laughed as he left the room. funny thing is, he did.

Spoot: The End, Chapter two in a heart beat!

Duo: I love that you're doing this!