She grumbled as she pulled another arrow from her arm, tossing it to the ground, though careful to keep her other hand on the dwarfling sleeping in front of her.
"You're supposed to be a terrible person, Elerin," she said in a mocking voice. "Yeah, well, someone needs to lower their expectations, because I just rescued this kid and I'm taking him all the way back to the Blue Mountains."
What really happened was a blur. She remembered a child screaming for help, then arrows, and blood. The poor boy had a horseshoe imprint on his head from his screams scaring the horse, but he seemed fine. He had said his name was Fili, and that was it.
As the sun began to disappear, she pulled her horse to a halt, carefully dismounting and taking the child off the horse and pulling the bed rolls from the saddle to lay out. Once the boy had been put down, she grabbed branches from a nearby tree and stacked them for a fire. With a quick spit, the fire roared and calmed down from the small branches.
When she turned to the boy, she found him sitting up, wide awake and in awe of what he had just seen. "Can you do it again?"
"We have a fire. I don't need to do it again."
She headed back to her horse, pulling water skins and food from different pouches so the boy wouldn't be so hungry or thirsty for the rest of the night. He accepted the food with many thanks and nearly swallowed it all in one bite.
When he started coughing, she chuckled and shook her head, "You shouldn't have eaten it so fast."
For the first time, she got a real good look at him. He was probably seven, but he had large blue eyes and the blondest hair. His blue tunic was covered in dirt and torn in many places as were his brown pants. She realized he was missing both of his boots as well.
"Tell me, Fili, why are you so far from home?" She asked as she looked around the near dark area around them. Being on the edge of a forest made her nervous for the boy, but she would not have anyone touching him again.
His once cheery face turned downcast as he looked at his hands, "Those mean Men took me. I was playing hide and seek with my brother, and they found me."
She ruffled his hair, "There is no reason to fear, bakani. They will not bother you again."
A large smile came to his face, "They wouldn't stand a chance against my Uncle Thorin!"
"Thorin? Thorin Oakenshield?"
He nodded excitedly, immediately going into a tale of how angry his uncle got one time and he killed twenty Orcs all by himself. By the end of the story, Fili had gotten quiet and his face was no long filled with joy, but tears. "I miss him. I want to go home."
"It will take a few days to get to the Blue Mountains. Do you think you can wait?"
He nodded with a yawn, "I can wait. Thank you for saving me." He frowned, "I don't know your name."
"Elerin."
"Elerin," he repeated slowly. He started to go to a bed roll when he stopped and went back to her side, "I don't want to sleep alone."
She gently pulled him to her lap and hummed as she ran her fingers through his hair. It didn't take long for the small child to go limp in her arms, leaning against her to sleep once more. With a gentle huff, she managed to stand up and place Fili on his bed roll. She sat next to him, willing herself to stay awake. Whatever plan those Men had with the child had ended with their lives, but she could only image what the price would be for him to be returned.
When morning came, Fili proved to be quite the adversary to wake. He barely woke when she gave him breakfast and fell asleep when she got behind him on the horse. She didn't mind, though. He was a good kid, but he was probably trouble at home. She could tell that much when he immediately started talking about his uncle.
The hard road left the forest, turning into endless plains where wind whipped the high grass. Elerin was happy for the sunny weather, even though she could see the storm clouds coming. If a storm did come, she prayed it would be short. A child was hard enough to take care of, but she couldn't fathom dealing with a wet child that got sick. The thought made her shudder.
"Hey, Elerin?"
"Yes, bakani?"
"Can you tell me a story?"
"I can try. What sort of story would you like?"
He was quiet for a moment before gasping, "Adventure! I want to hear an adventure!"
"An adventure, huh? I think I know just the story."
Elerin wasn't a story teller, at least not a fictional story. She couldn't read them correctly either, at least not with the right energy to keep children hanging onto their seats or biting their nails in anticipation. So, she told him a story of an age where she existed and he did not.
Fili gasped, "He cut off his hand?!"
"Yep, the broken sword was sharp enough to go straight through his fingers, and when Sauron lost the Ring, he lost his power, and thus, Middle-earth was saved from the ever reigning terror that Sauron brought."
"What happened to the Ring?"
"Isildur kept it," she answered dismally.
"Like a trophy?"
"Yes, just like a trophy. Only, this trophy was cursed. Fili, you should never keep a magic ring. That will only lead to death."
He swallowed hard as she pulled her horse to a stop, getting ready to camp for the night. He was happy to help collect sticks for the fire, and watched in awe as she spat into the wood once more, igniting the sticks.
"How do you do that?"
"Magic," she lied easily. She was not going to go into the details of being a Dragon. Not when Dwarves had an intense hatred for the beasts. There was no need in confusing him.
"That's so cool! I wish I could do magic."
"Dwarves have their own magic. It's not as elegant as the Elves or as open as the Wizards, but it is there. Dwarves are craftsmen of the highest regard. Yes, Elves and Men make their own things, but I would choose the sword of a Dwarf over that of an Elf any day."
"You mean it? Maybe you can help Uncle with selling his swords!" His excitement died down, a frown on his face that almost looked permanent, "Getting kicked out of Erebor really hurt the Dwarves, Elerin. I don't know why Uncle decided to go to the Blue Mountains when he could have gone to the Iron Hills."
"You will understand when you are older," she answered bitterly.
She had met Dain once before and she never wished to see the idiotic dwarf again. He had been more than annoying and a very ungrateful guest in the halls of Erebor. Why they were all there, she could not remember, but Dain had made his impression and she wished to never meet him again. His love for war and power rubbed her the wrong way and made her anxious.
"Do you not like Dain?" Fili asked as he chewed on a piece of dried meat.
She looked at the boy then the fire, "Do not worry about my opinions of your kin, bakani. I do not want to cloud your judgment."
"When did you learn Khuzdul?"
"I only know a few words," she replied, her eyes on the fire. "Not enough for a conversation, and I wouldn't be able to tell you a story in the language either."
He grinned, "So I can make fun of you all the time and you probably wouldn't know it."
She returned the smile, "Well, now I will know since you told me."
He moved to her side, scooting into her lap, letting her run her fingers through his hair once more as she hummed.
"Can you sing me a song?"
"I can try," she said, still running her fingers through his hair. "Now that you've asked, I can't think of any."
After a moment, she cleared her throat and sighed.
I saw the light fade from the sky
On the wind I heard a sigh
As the snowflakes cover my fallen brothers
I will say this last goodbye
Night is now falling
So ends this day
The road is now calling
And I must away
Over hill and under tree
Through lands where never light has shone
By silver streams that run down to the sea
Under cloud, beneath the stars
Over snow one winter's morn
I turn at last to paths that lead home
And though where the road then takes me
I cannot tell
We came all this way
But now comes the day
To bid you farewell
Many places I have been
Many sorrows I have seen
But I don't regret
Nor will I forget
All who took the road with me
Night is now falling
So ends this day
The road is now calling
And I must away
Over hill and under tree
Through lands where never light has shone
By silver streams that run down to the sea
To these memories I will hold
With your blessing I will go
To turn at last to paths that lead home
And though where the road then takes me
I cannot tell
We came all this way
But now comes the day
To bid you farewell
I bid you all a very fond farewell
Fili had fallen asleep, his head against her chest, curled up and comfortable. Her mind went back to the night before. Thorin was probably out for blood, but he would not be able to get his vengeance. She frowned as she placed her hand on her shoulder where an arrow almost pinned her to the ground. She had lost her small knife in that fight, mostly using the Men's weapons against them.
She wasn't a fan of fighting. The bloodthirst that lingered within her soul always made fighting difficult. She could not fight or spar, or her body would go into overdrive and kill. Those men didn't have to die, but they did, and she couldn't fix that. She was just fortunate Fili wasn't watching. He would be a Dwarf warrior one day, but he did not need to see someone get beheaded. Her brows furrowed as she tried to remember the punishment of Dwarves. Did they behead people or just drop them into the unending nothingness the mountain could offer?
It was another question for another day.
The a horse came to a stop, heavy feet hitting the ground and approaching her as she sat with the boy in her lap. If she hadn't smelled him before she heard him, she would have been worried, but the Dwarf was no doubt searching for Fili had come to a stop.
"You're looking for Fili?" She asked quietly, careful not to wake the boy.
"You've seen him?"
"I will speak only to Thorin Oakenshield," she said a little louder.
She was soon staring up at a familiar black haired dwarf who had his sword drawn, his blue eyes glaring threateningly in the firelight. Thorin's jaw went slack for only a brief second before he saw the boy in her arms.
"I killed the men that held him," she said as he sat by her.
"He was not injured?"
"No, he's fine. He'll be happy to see you when he wakes."
Thorin looked much older than she remembered him. When had his hair started to grey?
"Mabanrûn, how long has it been?"
He shook his head, "Too long. King Thror has passed, and my father is missing. Frerin has passed as well, leaving this one and another to me."
She grabbed his hand, looking at the ring on his hand for a moment before going back to playing with Fili's hair, "I was unable to help your grandfather or father because they agreed. I can help you, Thorin. All you need to do is ask, and I will be at your side."
He nodded before laying down on the bed roll and sighing, "Your bedrolls are always comfortable."
"Yet no one buys them," she grumbled.
He gently grabbed her hand, "Come with me, Elerin. Dis will be happy to see you again. She has two children, this one and another."
She sighed a bit, "Thorin, they will not be happy to see me. Your laws will not allow it, unless Balin knows one. I am not allowed in any Dwarf kingdom."
He frowned when he looked at the brand that had been placed on her neck. The vague shape was that of a Balrog, though now that it had been so long, it looked more like a butterfly. "We need to change that brand to a Dragon rather than the Balrog." He reached up, gently running his finger over the mark, but unable to stop the smile, "It looks like a butterfly."
She chuckled a bit at that, gently moving Fili from her lap to the bedroll by Thorin. "That does not make the banishment less true."
"As of right now, our records of banishment are locked away with a Dragon. Without record and a butterfly on your neck, I think we can figure out a way around it."
"I will go to the Blue Mountains with you to visit Dis and see the other child, but I cannot stay, mahd. I will not break the laws of your people more than I have." She laughed humorlessly, "Did you know you are supposed to kill me should I be near another Dwarf, especially royalty?"
"From the holes in your clothing, someone else has already tried to kill you and failed like everyone else."
"When was the last time you actually got some sleep?" She asked him.
"I do not know," he replied honestly.
"Come, lay down and you will get some rest tonight."
He chuckled as he moved to where his head was in her lap and closed his eyes as she played with his hair. "This reminds me of happier days."
"Sleep, mabanrûn," she ordered gently. "Or should I sing you a lullaby as well?"
"If you wish," he replied quietly.
Lay down
Your sweet and weary head
The night is falling
You have come to journey's end
Sleep now
And dream of the ones who came before
They are calling
From across the distant shore
Why do you weep?
What are these tears upon your face?
Soon you will see
All of your fears will pass away
Safe in my arms
You're only sleeping
What can you see
On the horizon?
Why do the white gulls call?
Across the sea
A pale moon rises
The ships have come to carry you home
And all will turn
To silver glass
A light on the water
All Souls pass
Hope fades
Into the world of night
Through shadows falling
Out of memory and time
Don't say
We have come now to the end
White shores are calling
You and I will meet again
And you'll be here in my arms
Just sleeping
And all will turn
To silver glass
A light on the water
Grey ships pass
Into the West
It was an Elvish belief, but it soothed the to-be king to sleep, in a way he hadn't slept in years. The age that had once been so prominent had disappeared, save the Grey in his hair.
She cherished her time with Thorin, keeping him close to her heart, despite the hate he had toward her. After their last meeting, everything had been cleared and Thorin ended up apologizing for his behavior. Thorin rarely apologized to even his father or grandfather which was what made their friendship so special and dear to her.
The possibility of love had always been there, but it had been with every Durin. All of them wanted wives that had the same intelligence she carried as well as the same charm and strength. There was no doubt Elerin held little beauty, even she knew that. She had been amongst Elves, Men, and Dwarves. There was a standard of beauty with each race, and she met no requirements in any.
Thorin had yet to find his wife. If she was honest, of all the Durins she had endured, Thorin was the one that needed a wife most. He had lost a kingdom and was building a new one, all alone, with no one to help him raise his sister's sons.
She sighed as her eyes moved to the black sky. Clouds blocked out the stars, and the moon was nowhere to be seen. Why did she have to be cursed with such a good heart?
"I want to ride with Uncle Thorin!" Fili announced as he made his way to climb onto his uncle's pony.
"Bakani, that's not how you get on a pony," Elerin chuckled as she walked to the pony and lifted Fili onto the beast.
"Have you always been that strong?" Thorin asked as he watched with mild interest how she managed to lift an easily eighty pound kid onto the back of a pony.
"If I want," she replied with a smile, "I remember helping someone onto a horse when he was much heavier because he was too short to get on, but still wanted to know what it was like to ride a horse."
Thorin must have been fifteen when that happened, and he was well over one hundred and fifty pounds, yet she had easily cupped her hands for him to step on and pushed him the rest of the way onto the horse before jumping onto the back and helping him steer the larger than life beast.
"Wow, are you really that strong?" Fili asked in awe.
"I guess you'll find out one day, won't you?" She replied with a smile.
The look on the boy's face was priceless when he watched Thorin climb onto the back of the horse, leaving him all alone on the pony. It had been a long time since Elerin had seen a face like that, so filled with terror, but still knowing he was safe all the same.
"You've always wanted to ride a pony alone," Thorin said as he sat behind Elerin. "Bingo is a good pony, Fili. He will not harm you."
"If he gets too rowdy, just stroke his neck, he'll calm down," Elerin advised.
Fili swallowed hard, but nodded.
"A gentle tap on the ribs, and on you go," she told him, watching him as he did it a bit too hard.
Realizing Fili would not react in time, Elerin took over, "Este, este. Quilda."
Immediately, the pony went from almost taking off in a full run to taking easy steps forward, staying next to the horse.
She could tell the words angered Thorin, but he did not complain as he watched his relieved nephew hold onto the reigns of the Pony, though rather stiffly.
"He isn't going anywhere any time soon, bakani," Elerin smiled. "Relax your arms. Like all creatures, they can sense fear. Be respectful, and all will be well."
Fili held onto the reigns tight, though as the ride continued, he began relaxing, smiling as he did so. "Elerin, what did you tell the pony?" Fili asked.
"To calm down," she answered, ignoring the growl in Thorin's chest. "I am a traveler. Knowing the language of Elves is rather useful. It certainly helps to sell things in the market places."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, if you ever find yourself in a town where the people prefer Elvish things, just learn the word for it in Elvish and it will be certain to sell. Yes, I know it's a cheap trick, but when you're out of food and have more things to sell, you do what you have to," she said, giving Thorin a knowing look. "If I had lied, that would be different."
She noticed the frown on Fili's face, bringing a frown to her own, "What is it, bakani?"
"Do you really have to leave?"
Her frown deepened, "I cannot stay long. My story is a sad one, Fili. You are not yet old enough to understand."
Songs: The Last Goodbye - Billy Boyd
Into the West - Annie Lennox
bakani- ray of light
Mabanrûn- survivor
Este, este. Quilda- calm calm. Be at peace