Quinn MacKenzie fronted the band Firestorm. With Quinn's smooth and low alto vibrato, the band had gradually gained notoriety until they dropped the single from their platinum-selling second album. Their cover of "Addicted to You" released a year ago, garnered industry accolades and launched them into stardom. They had been touring for the last six months and Quinn was tired. They had one more appearance at Madison Square Garden before returning to LA and a long needed break. They were scheduled to perform at this year's Grammys when "Addicted to You" was nominated for "Best Pop Duo/Group Performance". Quinn didn't think they had a prayer of winning. The competitors included a Rihanna/Drake collaboration, and The Chainsmokers.

Touring for her had become something to endure, and although she and Firestorm were forever grateful to their fans, she thought of it as something they had to do rather than what they wanted to do. It was also lonely and sometimes boring. Long stretches of waiting around between performances, catching a plane at midnight for the next tour stop, or chartering a bus if it was close enough.

It didn't hurt their success that Firestorm was an all-female pop/rock group and that they were all lesbians. "Addicted to You" hit the airwaves just as the lesbian chic trend was rising. Though there were numerous lesbian music stars over the years, notably Melissa Etheridge, KD Lang and the Indigo Girls, Firestorm's crossover appeal filled concert seats. The cliche "boys want to be them, girls want to be with them" was an understatement. Toward the end of the tour, security had to be significantly increased at their venues. In Dallas, Quinn had to be physically wrested from a screaming, crying 20-something that had firmly attached herself to Quinn's waist on stage. It truly rattled her, as she never thought of herself as any kind of "rock star". She just wanted to make music with her besties.

Although she was actually somewhat shy, on stage and in interviews she came off as vulnerable and approachable, but confident, with just a touch of swagger. People percieved her to be endearing and "real". Her smile and her laughter came easily enough, and her brand of humor fell between dry and sarcastic, but never snarky. She was passionate about her music and LGBTQ issues, and it came through whenever she had the opportunity to talk about either. Her voice was lower on the female vocal register, and sometimes raspy, depending on how much singing or drinking she had been doing in the last 24 hours. It was a sexy speaking voice, her singing voice even more so.

Quinn was nearly obsessive about keeping her private life private. Though she willingly and openly discussed her sexual orientation, she would not discuss her social life. At all. She was known to have walked out of more than one interview if any question about it came up. As a result, two things generally happened: 1) her friends were hounded about her private life, and 2) the tabloids and entertainment outlets just made things up. Her friends knew not to say anything or face Quinn's wrath, or the loss of her friendship or both. They all referred the interviewer back to Quinn for answers, and of course, she never answered. The media had her linked to everyone from princesses to pop stars to presidential candidates. It was patently ridiculous. She was literally never seen in public without her bandmates. When the paps with their long-range telephoto lenses tried to catch her doing something (anything), invariably they got a candid shot, but she was always alone.

The truth was that Quinn was alone, single and alone. She hadn't dated anyone in nearly two years, since before Firestorm's rise to fame. She had two issues with dating. The first was that she didn't feel it would be fair to the other party. Her schedule and fame were not condusive to developing, let alone maintaining, any kind of healthy romantic relationship. Secondly, she didn't really trust anyone in or around the entertainment industry. They all had some kind of an agenda. Hollywood was, well, Hollywood. Nothing about it was genuine or sincere. Or true for that matter.

She knew that she had a lot to offer the right someone. She was a hopeless romantic, and unafraid to express how she felt. She knew she had the capacity to love deeply. She wasn't necessarily afraid of getting her heart broken, but she didn't want it to happen for the wrong reasons. If she and her partner split because of personal incompatibility, or life changing events driving them apart, that was one thing. But to be shattered by betrayal was something else altogether.

And, of course, love and sex were entirely different things, at least in Quinn's eyes they were. She was a highly sexual individual, just hitting her prime. She was comfortable in her own skin and proud to be an out lesbian. Her obvious sexuality came through on stage, only adding fuel to the "personal life" enigma. People couldn't understand how anyone so blatantly sexy could possibly be alone. It was like oil and water. "Single and sexy" made sense, "alone and sexy" didn't. Hence the media belief that there had to be someone she was fucking. Of course, Quinn had needs like anyone else. She did what she could to keep things under control, but there were times her libido simply would not allow another night with her vibrator. On those nights, she needed to hold someone, to taste them, breathe them in. On those nights, she would find some obscure gay bar, usually far from LA, and have anonymous sex with someone she picked up.

One requirement was that they had to be single. Of course she had no way of knowing if they were lying, but at least she asked. And they had to be okay with her not saying much. There wasn't ever any deep meaningful conversation, sometimes no conversation at all. No small talk over coffee in the morning, she was gone as soon as the deed was done. That was if she went home with them at all. There were many bathroom stall trysts and back alley liasons. Surprisingly, she was seldom recognized. She simply covered her white-blonde locks with a backwards ball cap or hoodie. Seen completely out of context from her public persona, people tended to doubt what their first impression told them. If anyone mentioned that they thought she looked a little like Quinn MacKenzie, she simply scoffed, looked at them like they were crazy, and walked off.

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Addicted to You - sung by Audra Mae; produced by Avicii, Arash Pournouri; written by Bergling, Davis, Krajcik, Pournouri