Chapter 1
"Shit. Shit. Shit." I say as I look at the positive pregnancy test on the counter. "What the hell am I gonna do?" I ask myself. I look up at the clock and see that it's time for me to leave for work. I toss the pregnancy test in the trash and head out the door. I pull out of my driveway and drive to work on autopilot. When I pull onto the lot, I just sit there in a daze for a few minutes before the prospect taps on my window. "Dani. You okay?" he asks. "Um...yeah. Just...haven't had my coffee yet." I tell him, getting out of the car and heading to the office.
I walk into the office, I clock in and get started with my day, hoping I can keep my head in check and not completely freak out until I get home. I get the repo list together and Kozik walks in to clock in. "Can you and Happy handle the repos?" I ask, not looking up. "Well good morning to you too beautiful." Koz says like he does every morning. Normally when he says it I just roll my eyes but this time, I didn't respond. "Hey. Are you okay?" he asks. "Just handle the repos please?" I say, handing him the list. "Yeah. Sure. Are you sure you're okay?" he asks again. "Yes Koz. I'm fine. Now, the repos. Please." I say without looking at him. He doesn't say anything else before walking out the door and I realize I snapped at him. Shit.
That evening, it's time to close up the office and Koz walks in to clock out and doesn't look at me. "Koz?" I call out and he keeps walking. I follow him out and grab his arm. He turns to look at me. "What?" he asks sharply. "I wanted to apologize for this morning. I just have a lot on my mind and I didn't mean to take it out on you." I tell him. I see his eyes soften and he nods before I let him go and he walks into the clubhouse without a word.
I stand there for a minute, watching him walk away. He's the last person that I want pissed at me. But I guess I fucked that up. I turn and walk to my car and head home. Walking in the door, I sit down and just stare off into nothing. What am I going to do? I don't believe in abortion and can't just give up my child. Fuck. I can't do this. I feel the tears start to fall and I curl into myself.
I am still awake when the sun comes up. I go through the motions of getting ready for work and drive on autopilot back to the garage. I walk into the office and clock in and get started. Koz walks in and clocks in and still isn't speaking to me. Once he walks out of the office, I sit down and sigh in defeat and put my head in my hands. Gemma walks in and sees me and closes both doors. "Alright. This is the second day in a row you look like someone kicked your puppy." she tells me. "I'm okay. Just tired." I tell her hoping she will believe me. "Bull shit. Talk." she tells me. "I fucked up Gemma." I tell her, trying to keep the tears from falling. "What happened?" she asks. "I've been having a shit couple of days and took it out on Koz and now he won't talk to me. At all." I tell her. "Baby, don't worry about him. He'll get over it and things will be back to normal." she tells me. "It's okay. For the better I guess." I say, going back to entering invoices.
That evening, it's time to close up the shop and Koz comes in to clock out. I clock out and wait on him to come out of the office before locking the door and heading to my car. I don't even make it to my car before the tears start falling. I pull out of the lot and head home, alone, again. Walking in the door, I don't bother to eat. I just sit on the couch and just stare off again. I don't know what I'm gonna do. And now, the one person that I care about hates me. I get up and shower and lay in bed but still can't sleep.
I hear the alarm go off and I've only slept maybe a couple of hours. Getting ready for my day, it's Friday so at least I can have the weekend to hide out and not have to deal with things. I have an appointment this morning and told Gemma I had some things to take care of. Walking into Dr Green's office, we do the bloodwork and she confirms that I am pregnant. Pulling over the ultrasound machine, I hear the heartbeat before she prints the pictures and tells me that I am ten weeks pregnant. Great. I pull onto the lot and head inside to clock in. "Hey baby." Gemma says. "Hey Gem." I say without looking at her. I sit down at my desk and she says "You know you can talk to me right?" I just nod my head yes. "Then talk." she tells me. I get up and close both doors and sit on the couch. She walks over and sits next to me. "I had a doctor's appointment this morning. I'm ten weeks pregnant." I tell her. She hugs me and says "That's great news baby." I look up at her and she's smiling. She sees that I'm not and asks "Why aren't you happy, baby?" she asks. I shake my head and say "I don't know who the father is." She looks at me confused because she knows I'm not the type to just sleep around. "What aren't you telling me?" she asks. "I went to a party with a friend and she went to hook up with a guy and when I went to leave, a guy grabbed me and pushed me against the side of the house and raped me. I didn't see who he was." I tell her as the tears start to fall. She just holds me while I sob. Once I get myself together, she tells me "Head on home and relax for the weekend. I'll be by tomorrow to check on you." I nod and hug her before heading to my car.
I don't look at anyone as I head to my car. Pulling off the lot, the tears start to fall again. Gemma stands at the office door and watches me leave as Koz walks into the office. "Where's Dani?" he asks. "Sent her home." Gemma says. "She sick?" he asks. "No. Going through some shit and it's got her head all twisted up." she tells him. "Gemma, what happened?" he asks. "Not my story to tell sweetheart. You'll have to ask her but my suggestion is to let her be." she tells him.