I always loved Christmastime. There was just something magical about it. The trees decorated with lights and ornaments. The joy of giving and receiving gifts. The holly and the ivy. The warmth and pleasantness of the season. It was always enough to make me giddy.

That was why Owlient decided to create me. Owlient wanted me to help the players of Howrse enjoy Christmastime even more by participating in a contest where they could design their own Christmas trees for prizes. I was to be given to all the players that participated in the contest's tutorial, in order to help them out. Then once it was over, I would leave them, head off towards the horizon, and live out my life the way I wanted to.

At least, that's what I assumed was going to happen.

I thought I was one of those Wandering horses. They would stay with players for a few days as a reward for completing a task, then they would go. It made sense for me to be one, didn't it? I was technically a reindeer, meant for the northern lands, with its endless snow and very cold temperatures. I had assumed I would be let go of and allowed to head that way. Imagine my shock when the contest ended and I was still around.

Players thought it must have been a mistake at first. They went to the forums and messaged the admins and moderators, asking when I was going to go away. Because they didn't see much use for me; I couldn't enter races, get sold, go on rides through forests or mountains, or even get sent off to the Safe Haven. "Something must be wrong here!" they cried. "She was only meant for this contest."

And the higher-ups replied, "There is no mistake. She is your reward for participating in the contest. She cannot be sold."

And so it was. I was stuck with players forever, unless they deactivated their accounts. There were a few things I could do, though. I could participate in lessons at the equestrian centers I was boarded in, and I could go on sleigh rides, which wouldn't make sense after the winter months. Who would want to go on a sleigh ride in the middle of April?

The admins could quash negative talk the second they overheard it, but I heard how the players felt about me. I was useless. I couldn't do anything. I couldn't be raced or sold. They didn't want me anymore. This isn't fair. I too felt it wasn't fair to be kept around, even when I knew I wasn't wanted any longer. But what could I say? You couldn't express your feelings in public, because you would get in trouble with the admins.

The players that owned me felt that it was only fair to blame me when the admins proved to be of no help. They would ignore me for days. They would board me in equestrian centers that had little to no prestige.

Their horses would treat me like the scum of the earth, ostracizing me. They cracked jokes about me, even when I was listening to them. They shoved and kicked and snapped at me. They shunned me when they felt that they'd had enough of me. But these were just the regular horses, pegasi, and unicorns. The Divines were worse. I won't go into detail there.

They all think I want to be here, but I don't. I wanted to leave. I didn't think I was going to be used in any kind of Christmas contest again. Suppose they made another like me for another Christmas contest. That Divine wouldn't figure out what was going to happen until it was too late. Then it would be in the same boat as me. Unwilling to stay, but unable to go. Hated by all that owned it, because they were unable to get rid of it.

I wish I could tell everyone what it's like to be me. I missed the warmth and joy of the Christmas season. I wanted to do more than what I could already do. How dare Owlient do this! I never asked for this, and players never asked for me for this long.

Christmastime now feels like an eternity away.

A little summary of this story's origins: during a tree decorating contest on Howrse held back in December 2017, players could get a Divine named Blitzen to help them. Blitzen could go on sleigh rides to improve her skills as well as get the player a prize (an ornament, a strand of garland, etc.) that they could use to decorate their Christmas tree. Everyone was okay with it until the contest ended, and Blitzen stayed around. Everything said in this little piece is true.

I decided to write something based on the whole Blitzen thing, but from Blitzen's POV. How do you think she feels, having to stick around even when her purpose has been fulfilled, being unable to do much with her existence? Couldn't be that great.