Harry Potter Fanfiction Censored
It's another boring day for Faylen and Harry Potter. All there was to do is the chores that the Dursleys were far too lazy to do. Normally, Faylen does the inside chores and Harry the outside ones. Today the Dursleys feel the need to switch things up. Now, Faylen is doing the outside chores, which consist of: doing the gardening (flowers, vegetables, herbs), mowing the lawn (takes a surprisingly short time to get done), painting the shed (the Dursleys don't even go in there- it's where I'm chained to sleep), painting the fence (you know, the [perfect place] for Aunt Petunia to do her daily gossip search), and clipping the shrubs (they've gotten clipped so many times I'm surprised they're still there, and not stubs).
The indoor chores consist of: scrubbing the kitchen floor (there's so much bleach in it I'm shocked my hands aren't permanently scarred). Washing the dishes (numerous as they are, you'd be surprised at how much the Dursleys can eat). Cleaning the fridge of spoiled food (mainly the fruit and vegetables that harry and I can't incorporate into our food). Cleaning Dudley's room (such a frightening task I wouldn't dare bestow it upon anyone else, lest they lose their mind). Dusting Aunt Petunia's wedding gifts (all completely silver or marble; you wouldn't believe how many she's got. Why does she even have that may in the first place?). Dusting the many pictures of Dudley (Dudley as an infant [small car], as a toddler [small truck], and Dudley as a teenager [big pig in a wig]). Cleaning all two and a half bathrooms (one for Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon to share, one for Dudley, and half for Harry and I).
When that's finally over I take stock of the pantry (my favorite chore of all). Once the pantry has been taken stock of either Harry or I, depending on who's doing the chore, is sent to the outdoor market to get anything we're running out of (those people see one of us at least once a week). All in all our chores are plenty.
"Fayn, get over here," Harry ordered.
"The Dursleys say that we're going to be switching chores today," he informed me.
"Right, so are we going to be doing this before or after breakfast?" I questioned.
"After, we are to have them complete before dinner," Harry replied, then left to go get started.
I walked into the half bathroom that Harry and I shared, and stared at my reflection. I have amethyst purple eyes with green sparks. My hair is pitch black with thin red and purple streaks, it's rather thick, and is known to have held various teeth of Aunt Petunia's combs. I'm 4'8.5. I know. I'm short. In my defense, Harry isn't that tall either, he's only 5'2. Anyway, I go outside and start on the outdoor chores. Personally I love the heat, it's one of the reasons I sleep outside.
While working I wondered just when the Weasleys would get here so Harry and I can get away. I know they won't arrive until Harry and I's birthday, but that's a day away. With the Dursleys, even seconds felt like years. Speaking of birthdays, Sunday will mark our seventeenth birthday; the day we come into our magical inheritance and (if you have one) a creature inheritance. I'm excited! Last year after OWLS, Professor Snape explained to the sixth year Slytherins that on your seventeenth birthday you may come into your creature inheritance and that it could be exceptionally painful if you are coming into a powerful inheritance. Apparently there are lots of creatures you could come into depending on your family tree. It is widely known that the Malfoy have a lot of veelas and elves in their family tree hence their handsomeness, beauty, and silvery blonde hair. The Black family has plenty of vampires and dark elves, Zabini: drackens and shadow demons, Weasleys are mixed heritage- there are too many creatures to specify which child will get what inheritance. My family- Potter -are known for mixing with many different creatures.
As I plucked weeds out of Aunt Petunia's herb garden, I made conversation with a rat. Unlike Harry, I can speak to any animal I see if my magic connects with it. For example, I can't speak to a shark because my magic hasn't connected to any underwater animals. I can talk to felines because my magic automatically connected to the feline family.
Back to my conversation with the rat I asked it, "What's up Owen?"
Owen the Rat said, "You. I don't understand why you keep on asking me that every time I see you, female human."
"It's just a term, Owen," I replied, exasperated.
"To answer your question, nothing new has happened. Oliver (a garter snake) and one of his mates (he has several) have once again produced a clutch of eggs, and they're giving some to you," he replied.
"Why do they keep having eggs if they're just going to give most of them to me?! Hell, why do they even give them to me in the first place?" I questioned making sure to keep my voice down so that I don't look like I'm talking to myself.
"They have so many clutches because of their short lifespan, and they give most of them to you to protect them from predators." he replied, before scampering into a bush when he heard the heavy footsteps of Dudley. As I turned to face the big oaf a called my cousin, I was hit by a jet of cold water from the hose.
"You were looking a little hot, Freak." he said as he continued to spray me, making sure I got water in my eyes. Once I was soaked to his satisfaction he turned off the hose.
"I hope you're feeling cooler, now," he said before waddling off to go join his friends that were calling out to him at the edge of the driveway.
I scowled at him behind his back, and turned back to my work, with my luck it will nearly be dinner time before I've completed these chores. I worked my way through the chores slowly, but surely. I finished barely in time to not be scolded by Harry for not finishing my chores before the allotted time frame, as it was; I got a scowl from him anyway. I followed Harry into the kitchen doing my best to not get even more on his nerves.
For some reason as Harry got older he became more strict with me, if it weren't for the fact that our parents were dead I would suspect that he was my dad, or something, just deaged. I washed my hand in the kitchen sink, before putting the beef and mushroom pot pies that Harry had prepared earlier into the oven. I looked over to Harry and found him chopping up a Caesar salad for Aunt Petunia since she wanted to 'keep her figure'. Laughable, I know. Harry saw me looking at him and pointed at the triple layer chocolate cake that had yet to be frosted, I had baked it while Harry was preparing the pot pies. Nodding my head I grabbed the cake and pulled it over to me, receiving a warning look while doing so. I pulled a spreader knife out of one of the drawers in the kitchen, and used it to scoop up some of the newly made dark chocolate icing, courtesy of Harry. I carefully spread it onto the cake being sure to leave slight ripples do that the cake looked like it had chocolatey waves on it. I put the empty bowl into the sink and put some sugar cherries on the top of the cake. Harry walked over to check on how I was doing and nodded his head.
The Dursleys came in from wherever they'd been and sat down. Harry and I walked out with the plates of food and set them down in front of their respective diners. Uncle Vernon nodded his head at Harry and me and began eating. While watching as the Dursleys eat Harry and I decided who would be cleaning the dishes and who would be going with Aunt Petunia to the store. When the Dursleys were done eating I collected the plates and went into the kitchen. As I began to clean the kitchen I could hear Uncle Vernon moving into the TV room, Dudley going up the stairs to his room, and Aunt Petunia screeching at Harry to get the grocery list. The kitchen is cleaned, so I'm locked into the shed by Uncle Vernon until tomorrow.
"Are you done for the day?" one of the baby snakes asked.
"Yes, I'm finished for now; all we need to wait for are the Weasleys to get us out of here." I responded digging into my pockets in order to find the pieces of food that I had stored.
"Food?" questioned a kitten, now sniffing at my pockets.
"Yes," I once again said. "There's also a pint of milk for anyone interested." By now all the animals were crowding against my side.
I passed around the food. Roast vegetables and cubed ham going to the kittens. The snakes got ant pupae, small bits of fried egg yolk, three birds that I had found in the bird bath. The mice got left over cheese, some almonds, and the fatty parts of bacon. I looked over to the bird nests that I kidnapped, and saw that the baby birds had all hatched. Reaching over to the can that held all the worms I had dug up, I carefully dropped two worms and one orange seed into each beak, making sure that they didn't choke. I placed the milk in the middle of all the animals and curled up on my hay bed. The animals finished eating and dragged the milk carton over to me. Understanding what they wanted me to do, I grabbed the dropper that was next to my bed and filled it with milk. I put one dropper of milk into each animal's mouth until the milk was finished. I hid the milk container and picked up the animals, I put them next to me on the little bed and curled back up on the bed. I thought to myself, 'the Weasleys will be coming tonight; Fred and George will be there, I'll be coming into my creature inheritance tomorrow, I'll be away from the Dursleys for good come tomorrow.' With those last thoughts, I went to sleep.