A/N This originally started out as a completely different oneshot story but then my mind just ran crazy and somehow it blew up into this multi-chapter mess that I just HAD to get out before the new season starts (luckily I have plenty of time). Each chapter is probably going to be written similar to this first one, since I have to cover certain events that took place before the start of the main plot. So while this story mainly focuses on Richonne, it's going to touch upon everyone. I'm also going to be switching POVs because I want to try and challenge myself by writing from the perspective of all the characters as they deal with all of the shit that's coming and in general I think it will help flesh out the story better. I did take some of the plot from the comics but this is VERY loosely based on the comic timeline and anything I take from the comics I'm already going to touch upon so you don't need to have read them. Hope you enjoy!

Michonne & Rick - The War's Not Done

"Rick don't do this." He could hear the small hints of anger and desperation in her tone, no matter how hard she tried to hide it behind her calm exterior. The way she crossed her arms and stood in front of him with her head turned up slightly brought him back to a similar time, where he was sitting in a holding room with his face bandaged, close to being too far gone, and she had pulled him back before it was too late.

"Don't do what?"

"You know what. You're pulling away."

"I'm not. I have other things to worry about. We have other things to worry about."

"Bullshit. Regardless of what's going on you can't hide it. You're holding back, distancing yourself, and treating me, Carl, and Judith either like we're glass or like we don't exist at all."

He didn't respond to her after that, simply turning away to sit on the bed they shared, his head down with arms hanging off of his lap. In that moment he knew Michonne could see how tired he was, his body looking as if it would break apart with one more blow. She knew he was tired, knew he was at the end of his rope, but she refused to allow him to quit. It was one of the reasons why he loved her so. She knew that no matter how tired, beaten, or broken he was, he would never forgive himself if he let go, if he gave up.

She would never forgive him either.

"What do you want?" He said, his voice empty of emotion.

"I want you to talk to me."

The midday sun was high in the sky, leaving little to no space for any shadows to be cast on the ground and adding to the near unbearable heat of the early spring. The weather was certainly unusual for the season, yet no one really had the time to think more of it. Michonne closed her eyes and laid back against the gently swinging porch bench, feeling the heat of both the sun and the heated wood of the bench burn her dark skin. It was a surprisingly quiet day in Alexandria, with only the occasional sound of Judith's cries and the settlement's day to day activities the only thing breaking the silent atmosphere. It was rare for everything to be as peaceful as it was, and even though the community had not experienced any trouble in the past few days, the air was still tense with fear and uncertainty.

It had been 3 months since the night Negan had cornered them and forced them to work for him, taking Glenn's life as a warning message, and in that short of a time it seemed as if a year's worth of changes had occurred. They have already had two altercations with Negan since, leading to multiple deaths and a full declaration of war. They had also found another community known as The Kingdom, and with the help of Jesus and The Kingdom's leader Ezekiel, have formed a fully trained militia and are in the process of staging their first strike. It had been a hard few months on everyone, but they had been able to still pull together, even though it felt as if their family had been torn apart.

Michonne had been given the day off as a part of the new system they were trying out, a way of boosting morale and letting everyone have time for themselves even with all that's going on. Every day there would be at least one person who gets the day off to relax and rest, only to be called upon if they were needed. On her first few days off Michonne was eventually needed for some reason. However, today was a rare time in which she had yet to be called on and had spent the day in the house watching Judith. The little girl had just begun teaching herself to stand up and could now easily walk while holding onto a wall. Her new skill has led to her wandering off more and more, her curious nature blossoming with her new found freedom. While her new tendency to move from Michonne's watchful eye has caused more trouble for the older woman, it has also caused Judith to tire out much quicker and sleep for much longer, leaving Michonne to herself for a few hours.

She refused to admit to anyone, even herself, of how desperately she needed this break. Lately she had been feeling exhausted at the end of every day, coming home only to curl up in bed and drift off to sleep. Between her and Rick meeting with Jesus, Maggie, and Ezekiel to plan the attack, watching over the day to day activities of Alexandria, helping to train the militia, watching Judith, and dealing with anything else thrown her way, she began to feel the weight of everything falling on top of her.

She could also attribute her exhaustion and sudden nausea to another reason, but she refused to acknowledge the most obvious answer.

The signs are all there and have been staring her in the face for two weeks straight, she has just been stubbornly ignoring them. She knows the truth and has known since the second time she started her day leaning over the toilet ridding herself of the previous night's dinner. But no matter how many days go by without her period or how many times she finds herself feeling similar to how she felt during her first trimester with Andre, she has found some excuse in her head for her growing set of specific symptoms. The realization of the truth has left her terrified, with denial being the only way to calm her growing anxiety.

"This isn't the right time. It can't be now."

Her heart began to race again as millions of questions flew to the front of her mind. How could they have been so careless? What does this mean for them, for Carl and Judith and the rest of their broken little family? How can they handle this with Negan breathing down on them, waiting to crush them?

When will she stop brushing it aside and tell Rick?

Michonne had always thought of the day when this should happen, the day that they would be able to live life happily. She had dreamt of marriage, maybe even a wedding. Of being a family with Carl and Judith. There were even times when she envisioned another child entering the mix, only to have them be chased away by thoughts of Andre. In the end though, she loved the idea of having a child with Rick, of being a family with Rick.

But not like this though, never like this. There were too many worries, too many fears, too many unknowns, too many chances to take with the position they were in now. But nothing can stop what already is, and she had to come to terms with that.

If only it were so easy. She didn't doubt that Rick loved her, she never would. But for the first time since the prison fell and she was left wandering alone, she was uncertain. Uncertain of the future, of where they go from here, of everything.

She was certain of their strength though, and of their love. For now, that would have to be enough.

There was a long pause before she finally heard his voice, filled with sadness and uncertainty. "I'm scared Michonne, okay? I'm terrified. For the first time in I don't know how long, I honestly don't know what to do."

"Glenn…..Maggie…they gave me hope. It felt like we were so close. But I couldn't protect us. I couldn't protect you. I was so sure we could take on anything, but now I'm so lost. I don't know if I can protect anyone from this. I don't think I can fight Negan." She watched as he shook his head while he talked, as if he were surprised at the words that came out of his mouth.

"You didn't fail anyone Rick," she slowly sat next him on the bed and reached out for his hand, "it's okay to be scared."

She was surprised to see his blank face turn to one of mixed anger and sadness as he jumped up from the bed, backing away slightly as he faced her. "How can you say that? Look at all that has happened because of me. Look at how many of our people are dead because of me!"

He was shouting now as tears threatening to spill from his eyes, and for a brief terrifying second, Michonne had thought she had already lost him. But she refused to let herself get riled up with him, but she had to admit it was hard. Seeing him like this, so hateful of himself, it broke her heart. As much as she wanted to scream and cry with him, that's not what he needed right now, that's not what they needed.

"I say that because it's true. We aren't your blind followers Rick. We all had a hand in this."

She stood up and walked towards him, her eyes staring into his. "We protected each other."

"Once we trap them in their base, the walkers can take care of the rest. Afterwards, we should be able to deal with whoever is left." Rick addressed the group in front of him, pointing to the circle on the map that marked the location of the Saviors, a place known as Sanctuary. The group in front of him consisted of Alexandria's fraction of the combined militia, it's size second to the Kingdom's. They had been slightly briefed on the plan before, but now the time had come to go over it in more detail, assign units and to make sure that everyone was clear on the main objective.

"They think they're safer because they have the numbers and the means, but they lack strategy. They almost never expect a counter move."

It was then that Tobin spoke up. "That'll only help us in the initial stage. After that, it's up in the air."

Rick pulled his hand away from the map, directing it towards Tobin, his voice stern. "That first stage is all we need. If we can trap them and cut them down from there, they won't have time to recover before we can make another attack. We've got to chip at them piece by piece, it's the only way this can work."

Rick stood and fully turned to them before continuing. "Remember they don't know that we have The Kingdom on our side, that gives us another element of surprise. They think they know our numbers but they have no idea. We can turn the tables on them. I'm not saying it's fool-proof, but we have an advantage right now that we need to use before it's too late."

Rick slightly relaxed as he saw the group before him nod their heads in agreement, only a few still looking skeptical. He knew this plan had some what-ifs to be dealt with, but it was the best they had given the position they were in and had the best chance of avoiding the most casualties. Above all, that was the most important to him.

"Tomorrow we'll go through the course again. Anyone on the afternoon shift, head over to the ammunition factory with Eugene. We're going to need as many bullets as possible. That's all."

As the group began to file out of the church, Rick took a second to sit and catch his breath, reflecting on the day. They were getting closer and closer to the scheduled day that they would launch their first strike against Negan, and Rick could feel the anxiousness begin to creep up on him. After all that has happened, after all the deaths that have occurred, he couldn't allow anymore to fall by Negan's hands. This plan had to work, he refused to accept any other outcome.

His heart felt heavy as he thought of all they had lost, how they were close, so close, and yet now everything seemed so far away. Every day was a fight again, and every night was spent on edge, waiting for another bomb to drop or for something else to take away everything they have tried to build.

He should be used to it by now, but every time he felt the semblance of peace, whether it was while watching Judith giggle as Carl made faces at her or holding Michonne as they drifted off to sleep, he began to hope again. That hope would then drive him to work towards the future, only to be struck down again.

At this point, he couldn't even tell himself that it wouldn't happen again, but he would do his damned hardest to at least try.

The thoughts of his family drove him from his seat, and directed his walk home, knowing that while Carl was probably still out working with the other members of the community, that Michonne would be home with Judith on her day off. He smiled and walked faster as he pictured coming home and wrapping his arms around his girls, spending the rest of the day talking with Michonne and playing with Judith.

His relationship with Michonne was barely 4 months old, and yet it felt as if they had been together for a lifetime. Being with her felt so natural, and yet there were times in which he still wondered what he had done to deserve her. In the aftermath of their first encounter with Negan, he had made the mistake of allowing his fear to let him pull away from her, from everything. And just like before, she stopped him from going too far and reminded him that he wasn't alone, that they were together.

His fears and doubts were still there, and they always would be. But the love he felt for his family, the love he felt for Michonne, it was enough to push him to keep going, a reminder that he had something to protect, no matter what happened.

And for now, that was enough for him.

"Remember when I told you that we were in here together?" He remembers that day well, the day the tower fell and the horde broke in. He remembers looking at her like a man seeing the sun for the first time when she chastised him for excluding the people of Alexandria from their plans. The way his knees became weak and his heart pounded inside his chest when he looked at her that day still makes him wonder why he didn't realize his feelings for her sooner.

"That hasn't changed. We made the decision to make the deal with Hilltop together, and now we've decided to go to war together. This isn't just all on you." She placed her hands on his shoulders, soothingly rubbing her thumbs across them. "We all made these choices, and we will all deal with what comes from them."

She lifted her hand up to his cheek and bent her head to look directly into his downcast eyes. "What I said before hasn't changed either. I was with you before, I'm still with you, and no matter where this takes us, I'll still be with you. I need to know you're with me too. You can't let Negan take you from you. You can't let him win."

He reached for her then, pulling her into a tight embrace before grabbing her face and pressing his lips against hers. It was moments like this that led Rick to question just where he would be without her, how it would even be possible for him to have gotten this far.

"I'm sorry. I love you," he said, resting his forehead against hers while still holding her face in his hands. "I love you so much."

"I love you too," she replied, wrapping her arms around him as he leaned back down kiss her again, deeper this time.

He is still unable to recall when or how they made it back to their bed. He can't even recall how their clothes ended up scattered across the floor. All he remembers is the peace he felt afterwards while he held her in his arms, their bodies still connected. In that one fleeting moment, he felt as if he could take on the world.

Rick was surprised to not see Michonne sitting at her favorite reading spot when he entered the house. For a moment he thought that she had been called away on a task until he had heard the sound of footsteps coming from upstairs. As he made his way upstairs in search of her, he passed Judith's room and took notice of his sleeping daughter before following the sounds of groaning and retching to the bathroom.

"It's me," he said after knocking twice before opening the door and taking in the sight of Michonne on her knees, emptying the contents of her stomach into the toilet. She gave a small sign of acknowledgement before turning back, her stomach rolling.

"Still sick?" Rick asked as he fully entered the room, still holding onto the doorknob. She nodded her head in response, still bowed over the toilet. In an afterthought he realized that it was a dumb question to ask, but seeing her like this surprised him. This was the third time he had caught her like this, and yet as sick as he knew she was, he had yet to catch her throwing up this late in the day.

"Anything I can get you?" He kept his voice gentle, with a hint of worry seeping through. Regardless of how many times she told him she was fine, he knew better. He had seen the changes in her mood, her energy, and yet he was still uncertain of-

And then, out of nowhere, it clicked. The tiredness, the nausea, the reclusive behavior. All of the pieces snapped together to form the complete picture inside his head, almost sending him reeling back into the door at the realization. He had always known that there was a small possibility, but they had been careful. This shouldn't have happened so easily, so carelessly. Yet still here they were, in another seemingly impossible situation that he could blame only himself for.

The sound of her retching brought him back out of his head. He collected himself as well as he could to kneel down next to her, holding her hair and rubbing her back while she finished emptying her stomach. Once her vomiting turned to dry heaving, he sat on the edge of the tub across from her and watched as she flushed the toilet and closed the lid to sit on top of it. She faced him with her eyes turned towards the floor, looking tired and as if she were in a daze.

"How long have you known?"

"A week or so," she replied, still looking at the floor.

"You should have told me."

"I didn't want to believe it myself."

He turned his head down and took a deep breath in, holding it for only a moment before closing his eyes and releasing it in an attempt to clear his mind and focus. "Have you seen Denise yet?"

"I don't need to. I'm sure of it."

"You should still get checked out."

She shook her head, "Denise has other things to worry about."

He raised his head to look directly at her and saw that she was still staring blankly at the tiled floor. "We all do. But we still need to make sure you're okay."

"We?" she said as she turned her head up to look at him, and just like every time since their eyes first met through the gates of the prison, Rick's breath was taken away as he looked into her deep brown eyes.

"You're not gonna go through this alone. I won't make that mistake again." Visions of Lori danced through his head, of her sad eyes and her face ridden with guilt as she tried her hardest to make amends with him. She offered him an olive branch more times than he could count during their days out on the road and at the prison and no matter how hard she tried to move forward with him, he cruelly pushed away any act of kindness she tried to give. His greatest regret has always been that he didn't get to tell her that he forgave her, to move forward with her, to let her know that he loved her and that he would do anything to protect her and their children. In the end, he let her suffer through her pregnancy without him by her side and he let her die without her knowing how much he loved her.

He would rather get eaten alive by walkers than fail Michonne like he failed Lori.

Michonne broke the silence by standing and walking over to the sink, turning the water on, and cupping some of it into her mouth. She swished it around before spitting it out and lifted her head up to stare at Rick through the mirror, a light smile on her face. "So how are we gonna do this?"

He stood and pulled her into a tight embrace, leaning his head against hers and taking in the warm almond scent of her hair. He would be lying if he said that there wasn't a part of him that was overjoyed at the idea of her being pregnant. The thought of Michonne carrying his child awakened in him thoughts that he had stopped entertaining long ago. Thoughts of marriage, of living safe and happy with their family, of not having to worry about where their next meal came from or if one of them would die today. All of these dreams that at one point seemed so well within their grasp were snatched away the very second Negan's bat first collided with Glenn's head.

He pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. "We'll figure it out," he said as he gently rubbed her back before kissing her forehead again, "we will."

"We can't let anyone else die like that. I won't allow it."

The sound of Rick's voice brought Michonne back from the edge of sleep. She thought that he had drifted off after they had separated and drawn the covers up over them. He had his front to her back now, his arms wrapped around her waist and his forehead leaning down against the nape of her neck.

"For now we'll obey, make him believe that he's won."

She nodded her head, understanding his plan, "it'll be easier that way."

"After that though, I'm still lost..."

She rolled over to face him, with his arms still around her, and cupped his cheek. "We'll figure it out."

He took the hand pressed against his cheek and kissed it before responding, his voice determined again, "we will."