Trump Card, Or: Donald Trump has sex with Scooby-Doo
Reigning President Donald Trump, sweaty after beating Bernie Sanders in a Tables and Ladders Hell in a Cell Cage match rose victorious among the crowd, his leotard soaked in the blood of the frail socialist. He thrusted one finger toward the heavens, as though to claim supreme victory over a puny god. He had won, with his presidential championship belt around his waist, and a meaty boner sticking out of his patented Trump Boner-Pants(TM), he made declaration to the crowd, "Let's make America Great again!" he called out to the audience. And the audience full of dumb assholes fucking erupted, like oh my god dude you should have seen it, it was fucking wild dude. It was like black friday times a million, I swear to god.
With that he left, hoisting two hands in the air, high fiving everyone he could on the way out, not even psyching anyone out either, he was genuine about these high fives, no joke man. Not a person near the exit was left hanging, that's just the kind of guy Trump is.
After leaving the arena, the crowd descended upon the Independent senator from Vermont like children would their christmas presents, tearing apart the exhausted socialist limb from limb, soaking the ring red in his commie blood, as is democratic tradition.
Outside the WWE Democracy Hall, Trump couldn't help but feel a mighty need deep within his woefully average gonads, he needed to fuck, and he knew it.
"I have to fuck, bad, and I know it" he said. And he did.
Walking down Democracy Avenue, arguably the most american avenue in the united states, and ironically the least democratic, Trump kept his eyes peeled for some hot trim to bury his four and a half inch penis in. Then he saw it, the hottest ass he'd ever seen on a dog.
"Hot damn, that is the hottest ass I have ever seen on a dog" he said, tugging at the collar of his blood soaked leotard. Much like the presidential position, he knew he had to get a piece of that sweet dog ass the moment he saw it.
Walking up to the dog with the confident stride that could only be achieved by the most pimpin' president in these United States, Trump attempted to make conversation, with a dog. No I'm not fucking kidding you.
"Hey, I'm the president of the USA, Donald Trump, maybe you've heard of me?"
Normally a dog wouldn't be able to respond, but this great dane could because it was actually Scooby-Doo, and as established in the Scooby-Doo canon Scooby-Doo could talk.
"Reah! Ronald Rump! Ri Rove Rou Ronald Rump! Rou're ronna make America great again! Rihehehehe!" the great dane said, wiggling that hot dog ass around and around like that one song by Ratt, I forget the title.
"that's always great to hear" the actual president of the united states said, running his fingers through that cornsilk combover fit only for a god. "Well, as you probably know, I'm a man that knows what he wants when he sees it, like when I see Muslims stinking up this great country with their stinky turbans and camels and other things generally attributed as being vaguely middle eastern, I know I want 'em out. And when I see your hot dog ass wiggling around I know I've gotta get a piece. So how about it, how would you like to take a tour of trump tower?"
"Rat repends, are rou ralking about roure renis?"
"Abso-fuckin'-lutley, pal." Donald trump said, pressing his incredibly average bulge into the dog's snout.