Right now I can't really remember how the world was before this happened. It's hard to remember how great something was with the reality of how it is now hitting you in the face every five seconds. How I wanted the world to be, on the other hand, was a completely different matter. For starters, if I had my way it wouldn't be raining right now, and second, this post-apocalyptic zombie shit wouldn't be happening.
I pull my rucksack back onto my shoulders as I stand up from the highway. The sun was barely coming over the horizon, breaking the clouds with brilliant spectral glimmers. I push my bangs from my face and kick an empty soda can down the tarmac.
I'm late. Dammit. Not like they'd worry about me anyway. They know how I get; I go off for walks and don't come back till sun up. But it's past sun up now. Great. I glance down the road and fidget with the small knife that I have hooked at my side. No walkers as of yet. There's always time though. There's always time for a bloody horde of them to come along, knock you off your feet and turn you into a three course meal. I doubt I'd be a very appetizing three course meal though, but it's not like you can walk up to these guys and yell 'I'm just skin and bone!' like Shaggy did on Scooby Doo.
That's the bad thing about this zombie lark, they aren't just guys in masks, they aren't Halloween freaks up a few months early for trick or treat. These guys are the real frigging living dead. One bite from these guys and you might as well top yourself there and then. That's if you've got a gun handy.
The good thing about these zombies though, they can't run, they aren't like the zombies I've seen on Twenty-Eight Weeks Later or Left For Dead, not like it matters, give them a few seconds and you can be surrounded by the assholes.
I traipse back through the woods and leave the highway behind. Nothing there but overturned cars and corpses, cars ain't much use unless there's fuel, and the corpses, well, are they really dead, dead or just dead? My eyes glance around instinctively every few seconds; I watch my feet as well, as cliché as it sounds, I wouldn't want to step on a twig when a walker's only a few feet away.
I let out a sigh and have a quick swig of water from my canteen. It's hot already, too hot for my liking. Coming from Alaska and being used to the snow and then being thrown into this rubbish is enough to make anyone hate the heat. I hate a lot of things nowadays.
The quiet chatter of the campsite meets my ears as I emerge into the thinner part of the woods. I see Shane, the cop… ex-cop… I suppose the law system can be thrown in the fire in this instance. He's pacing round the clearing closest to the woods, picking up sticks and logs for a small fire later tonight. The RV is visible too, no doubt Dale is still sat on the roof in his deck chair, rifle in his hands, binoculars round his neck, staring off into the horizon, waiting… hoping… that the others come back. We sent some off a couple of nights ago to get some supplies from the city. We ain't heard head or tail of them since then. They should be back today or tomorrow, probably the latter, we all know the city is crawling with walkers.
Shane spots me as I emerge from the trees, my rucksack slips down to the crook of my elbow and I drop my canteen back into the open pouch.
"Ya'll shouldn't be going off on your own like that," He said shaking his head. "What if a walker spots you?"
"Then I'd put my knife through its skull like I did the last one," I reply throwing him a cocky wink. I can be too cocky sometimes. I was when this first happened, before I joined this group, that's how I got the scar on my side. Some crazed nut decided to shoot me, thought I was a walker, I suppose it was my own fault really, should've surveyed him a while before approaching him.
"Just watch your back, ok, Saskia?" I turned and resisted the urge to pop out my hip as I replied.
"Yes, Sir," I said saluting him, "You don't have to be such a worrywart, Shane." I turn on my heel and head towards the camp.
I drop down on the logs in front of the long burnt out fire and pull out a few packs of jerky that I found in the cars on the highway. Tearing the bag I take a long sniff as the smell wafts up my nose. There was nothing in this new post-apocalyptic world as amazing as beef jerky, and barbequed beef jerky at that.
Lori, a tall brown haired woman, emerges from her tent not long after I take my first few bites of jerky. I hold the bag out to her but she declines politely.
"Hey, Sask," She asks, "Will you watch Carl for me, just for a few minutes?"
"Sure," I say, "Tell him and Sofia to get their butts over 'ere and I'll feed them some jerky." She chuckles at my light-heartedness as quickly speaks to Carl before sending him and Sofia over to me.
The two kids sit opposite me. I forget how old they are, but it's too young to see the amount of death that they have already seen. It doesn't affect them much though, or at least they don't show it. Carl misses his dad. He was in hospital when this virus got out and the whole world went to pot.
He died. Shane was at the hospital when it happened, but he managed to get away, he managed to get out and save Lori and Carl. At least Carl has someone to look after him though, Shane looks after him, and Lori of course, but Shane is like is dad now. He'd be the perfect dotting dad if the world wasn't in turmoil. Then again, if the world wasn't in turmoil Carl would still have his dad.
Sofia still has her mom and dad. He isn't much of a dad mind, more like the biggest sexist prick that has ever walked the earth. I don't like him. I know he hits Carol, everybody does. We aren't blind to the bruises even though she shrugs them off. She's loyal to him, something I wouldn't be, I'd have written that guy off a long time ago.
I offer Carl and Sofia some beef jerky, which they take gratefully. I then pull out a mini travel chess set from my bag. I've been teaching them how to play. Sofia ain't half bad; Carl still needs some work though. Still, it gives us something to do.
"Shane says he's gonna teach me to shoot soon, Saskia." Said Carl excitedly, his face turned downcast as Sofia took his knight.
"You just make sure you point that thing the right way when you do," I say jokingly, "You remember me telling you 'bout the guy who got me?"
Carl nodded. "You got him back though,"
"I did," I pop another piece of jerky in my mouth. "Just remember one thing, you have to be sure that you really want to pull the trigger when you do."
The mood turned solemn for a moment before I noticed a move on the checked board. I bent close to Carl and whispered the move in his ear. His face lit up as he dropped his bishop in line with Sofia's king.
"Check mate!" He yelled triumphantly.
"Hey! That's no fair!" Cried Sofia, "You cheated!"
"I was merely suggesting a helpful hint, my lady," I said putting on a fake British accent and bowing as low as I could. The pair giggled at my accent before they set the game up again. Carol was observing quietly from by her tent.
Lori came back soon after the second round of chess started. I didn't ask her where she'd been, it wasn't my place to nose about, but I had a feeling that she'd been off with Shane again. Once again, I'm not blind to the blatantly obvious.
The rest of the day was spent sharpening my many knives. I like knives, they're sharp and silent. They can slice right through anything given the time to do so. I would much rather have knives than a gun, but given the circumstances a gun could come in handy too. I helped Carol clean some clothes with Amy. Amy's sister Andrea was one of the people who had gone scavenging this week, Amy was worried for her.
I climb up onto the RV next to Dale towards midday. The camp is content. Carol and Sofia are sitting by their tent, a mother and daughter chat. Carl is fidgeting whilst Lori cuts his hair; honestly I've never seen a boy fidget so much in my entire life. It's only a darn haircut. I'd stolen Dales chair earlier on, not like he minded, he was always kind to me. He was like the grandpa I never had. I hear the giggles of Lori not long before an annoying wail of a car alarm sets off up the hills.
Shane is up in moments, as am I. Dale is staring off into the distance through his binoculars. I can't see anything in these darn hills. "Talk to me Dale!" Shane yells up to the RV.
"Can't tell yet," He replies, bringing the binoculars away from his face. I squint into the hills as the noise draws louder. Amy turns towards the dirt road, her hand just above her eyes, shielding them from the sun.
"Is it them?" She asks hopefully. "Are they back?"
I glance down to Shane, he's loading his shotgun. Always rash, that's Shane. I wouldn't put it past him to blow a hole in the poor guy who's driving that car. Dale raises the binoculars to his face again.
"I'll be damned," He whispers. I look at him then back to the hills where a red spot is just visible to my eyes.
"What is it?" Amy asks again, a frantic edge creeping into her voice.
"A stolen car's my guess." I jump down from the RV at Dale's words, forgetting the ladder completely.
I land, a dodgy landing mind, but a land none the less, and head towards the dirt track just like everybody else as the red car pulls round the corner. I chuckled to myself when I saw who was in the car. Trust it to be Glenn.
"Holy crap!" Said Dale, surveying the car as the wail continued to echo round the hills. "Turn that thing off!"
Glenn stepped out of the car, a beam on his face, "I don't know how," He said shrugging his shoulders. Does he want to draw the walkers up here?
Everybody is on him in a second, yelling, talking, asking him questions, all trying to be heard over one another and the screech of the car alarm. Shane was barely audible but Glenn popped the hood on his request. Amy was yammering about Andrea and the whole thing was making my head ache. The screech dies as Shane pulled something from the front of the car.
"Is she ok?" Amy was asking, "Why isn't she with you?"
"She's ok, yeah." Said Glenn breathlessly. He stood behind the car door, it was more of a shield to the onslaught of questions he was facing at the moment. "They're all ok, everybody is… well Merle, not so much…"
"Are you crazy driving this bastard up here?" Asked Shane who was now hunched over the hood. "Are you trying to draw every walker for miles?" Glenn looked down and I snorted.
"Gah, leave him be, Shane." I quip, "We all need a bit of a thrill sometimes," I smile at Glenn who returned the favour. Shane however didn't seem too pleased at my comment. He was about to reply but Dale cut him off.
"I think we're ok,"
"Don't be stupid, ok." Shane replied harshly. God, tension in this place rises like a damn tsunami.
"That alarm was echoin' all over these hills, it would be hard to pin point the exact source." Dale was right, we knew it, but Shane was less than impressed. "I'm not arguing, just saying… Just think things through a little more carefully next time, will ya?" He added to Glenn who shuffled uncomfortably.
"Sorry… I got a cool car…" It was hard not to smile at that one. I walked right up to Glenn and smacked him lightly on the head.
"Trust you to think about how cool the car is," I say giving him a small hug. "We're just glad that everyone's ok, that's all." Glenn seemed comforted at the hug. I pulled back from him just as a delivery truck pulled round the corner. They were ok… well apart from Merle apparently… not like anyone would care about that, only Daryl. His brother.
Andrea was first from the truck, she ran towards Amy, her face scrunched with emotion. It was a heartfelt reunion. They embraced one another; Amy's whimpering drowning in her sister's shoulder. I could see Carl off to the side, tears were in his eyes. He missed his dad. He wanted a reunion like Amy and Andrea. I suppose everybody would like a reunion like that. I would. But if I had my reunion, the person I hugged wouldn't hesitate in taking a bite out of my neck… and I guess I wouldn't hesitate putting a bullet in his head. Somebody has more than likely already beat me to it.
"You are a welcome sight!" Exclaimed Dale, embracing the others. I hugged Andrea quickly after Amy had released her.
"Welcome back," I say. "This one wouldn't shut up about you," I nudge Amy's shoulder gently. "Toler her you'd be alright."
"How'd you get outta there anyway?" Asked Shane. I smiled, punching T-Dog lightly in the shoulder. He returned the gesture and everyone moved further into camp.
"New guy," Said Glenn, not moving from his car. "He got us out." A new guy? Another survivor? We haven't come across any of them in months. To be honest, I was the last they found.
"Hey, helicopter boy! Come say hello," Morales yelled inbetween hugging his wife and kids. Everyone glanced over towards the truck, towards the new survivor that was emerging. "Guy's a cop, like you."
You could have heard a pin drop as the new guy emerged. He was dressed completely in police attire, had a badge on and everything. A small amount of stubble covered his chin. Shane looked shocked, more so than I have ever seen him before. He stepped back a little, almost steadying himself. He pointed behind us, a whisper of something escaping his lips. Then a cry, a cry of nothing more than complete and utter joy.
"Dad!" It was Carl, "Dad! Dad!" Carl ran by me, right towards the man he called Dad.
The cop embraced him and the pair tumbled to the ground. The cop held onto Carl with nothing less than urgency, he stood to his feet, tears in his eyes as he walked towards Lori. Everyone's eyes were on them as they grabbed onto each other. It was a beautiful sight, a welcome sight, Carl finally had his dad back, and Lori had her husband. Perhaps the world was setting itself right.
The camp was quiet that night, a sense of peace filled all of our hearts. The fire burned brightly in the centre. I sat next to Glenn, opposite us, Lori, Carl and the new guy, Rick. He told us of his time, about how he managed to get out of the hospital.
I suppose out of all of us, he had the most fucked up way of finding out how the world had gone insane. He knew nothing of it, woke up, his family was gone. The dead walking the streets and he had no idea how any of it had happened. It was so cliché, just like on Twenty Eight Days Later. I suppose though, the best has now happened and he is with his family again, that's all that matters in this world now. Family… our own, and staying alive. That's all we have to do now, survive, ride it out until the dead die from starvation.
I sipped at my cup of tea, burning my tongue as I swallowed. I pulled my coat higher up around my neck, the cold was nipping at my neck. Over on the other side Ed, Carol's beast of a husband through another log into his fire.
"Hey, Ed," Called out Shane. "Wanna rethink that log?"
Here he goes again. That damned fool of a man. Does he not care for the rules? Does he want to get us killed? Does he think the rules don't apply for his sorry ass?
"It's cold man," He said, turning his head towards the sky.
"Cold don't change the rules, does it? Keep our fires low, just embers, so we can't be seen from a distance, right?" I doubt he could help the agitated tone that crept into his voice. Hell, that man irked me by just being here, I wish someone would just slap him and get the darn thing over with.
"I said, 'it's cold,' mind your own business for once." I'd have hit him just for that, the great oaf.
Shane stood from his place quickly. You know that moment when you wanna get some popcorn? When you watch a good fight at an ice hockey game and you wanna cheer and make sides? This was one of those moments, I hope he's gonna punch him, slap him, something like that, teach him not to be so self-centred. Didn't happen though, did it? Course not.
"Ed, you sure you wanna have this convocation?" Shane's voice was stern.
"Go on," Said Ed, "Pull that thing out, go on." He directed his comment at Carol.
I resisted the urge to groan. That sexist lazy pig, he's too far up his own arse to get up and move that stinking log himself. Carol, being the loyal woman she is, stepped forwards and took the log from the fire. I rolled my eyes. She was too good for her own good.
"Sorry 'bout the fire," She apologised to Shane, but he waved it off.
"No apology needed. Ya'll have a good night, ok?" He stood up and left the three, "Appreciate the cooperation." He added snidely to Ed.
The convocation then turned to the matter of telling Daryl about what happened to Merle. T-Dog wanted to take the blame for dropping the key, but Rick wanted to tell him because it was he who in fact chained Merle to the bar. In the end it was decided that Rick would be the one to tell Daryl, it would be as Glenn put it 'might sound better coming from a white guy.'
"We could lie," Suggested Amy.
"We all know that ain't gonna work," I said taking a sip from my tea. "Daryl would still wanna go an' look for him, just like we would if it was someone in our family."
"We tell the truth… We did what had to be done, we all know Merle was out of control, he would have gotten us all killed." Andrea stopped and turned her head to Lori. "Your husband did what was necessary, and if Merle got left behind it was nobody's fault."
"Tell that to Daryl…" I mumbled under my breath.
"I don't see a rational discussion to be had from that, do you?" Dale said, raising his bushy eyebrows.
He was right; there was no way we could tell Daryl about Merle without him blowing a fuse. That guy was more agitated than a starving walker. One way or another we were going to have to tell Daryl what happened, and tell him straight, but nothing good will come of this, 'cause nothing good comes from the Dixons.
"I stopped just long enough to chain the door." Piped up T-Dog, "Maybe half a dozen geeks could squeeze up against the door at any one time, not enough to break that lock. My point is that Dixons' alive… still up there… handcuffed on that roof. That's on us…"
The camp died down after that. Everybody retired to their tents. Mine was next to Glenn's, just opposite the RV. I could hear Dale on the roof still, he wouldn't go down till late morning when he would switch with Shane or T-Dog.
I climbed into my sleeping bag and pulled a ragged old photo from under my pillow. I was in the right of the picture, my mother next to me. It wasn't that long ago, I look almost the same as I am now; my mother looked the same till she got bit. Her hair was red, like mine, it hung just past her shoulders, she was in a summer flowered dress. It was warm that summer, the best summer on record apparently. On the left was my dad, he was a tall well-built man, with black hair and dark eyes. He was smiling too; his arm was hooked around my mother's back, protecting her, always protecting us.
My father was the first to go. It was a Monday, I distinctly remember because we would always go out for a meal on Monday's. I was at home, we all were at home, we thought that we would be safe from all this… it was on the news everywhere… and then they were everywhere. It was our neighbours, they were screaming, there where gunshots echoing up the street but that only attracted them. I don't remember how many there were but when they broke down the door my dad just told us to run. I didn't want to leave him, I was screaming the whole time, but it was my mom who dragged me out the back. We ran as fast as we could, but I could still hear him screaming in my head. I could still see them tearing into his flesh… there was so much blood.
We got into the car, drove towards the highway… it was blocked of course and there was geeks everywhere. We abandoned the car, took the clothes and food we had in the back in case something like this happened. We took the guns too. Dad made sure we had the guns.
I don't remember how they got my mom. She didn't tell me she got bit. When the fever started coming I knew that she wasn't just sick. It was the Tuesday when I put a bullet through her head. I was on my own for a while, just trying to survive. I guess being a major horror movie fanatic got me up on the knowhow of all these zombies. Don't get bit. Don't get scratched. Be silent, and do not, unless it is completely necessary, fire a gun.
I met up with Glenn in Atlanta not long after that, I kept moving, stole cars when I needed to, and avoided the cities. It was the only way to stay alive. I was grateful for the group for taking me in, I wished I'd had a group like them to start off with, I wouldn't have had to spend so many of my nights cooped up in the trees.
I turn over and pushed the picture back under my pillow. Staring through the flap in the tent I could clearly see the stars. I used to watch the stars in Alaska. They seemed brighter back then, back when there was hope for everybody. My dad used to tell me 'bout the God's who made the stars, all the myths and legends surrounding them. I bet the God's didn't have to deal with a zombie apocalypse… well lucky them. They don't know of the real world.
Stewing in my thoughts I flick off the light, "Stupid world…" I say to myself, closing my eyes.
The morning was bright despite the thunderstorm we had late on in the night. I crawl out of my sleeping back and stretch my arms over my head, hearing my shoulders crack a little. I told Carl and Sofia we could go climbing trees today. Not too far in the woods, but just far enough to get a decent tree. Lori didn't seem to mind, she knew I'd protect them. Jacqui offered to come too; I didn't mind Jacqui was good company when you needed a chat.
I climbed out of the tent, deciding to skip breakfast as Daryl would probably be back with some squirrels from his hunt. I don't mind squirrels but they can get a bit tiring after a while… maybe he'll bring us a deer or something. Yeah, that would suit me better.
Carl is sitting on the log with Sofia as I head towards the burnt out fire. Their eyes turn excitedly towards me, and I jump up and fold my arms up towards my armpits like an ape.
"Ready to be monkeys?" I ask them, turning to Jacqui who laughed at my feeble monkey impression. They nod excitedly and we head off towards the trees.
"Not too far, Carl!" Lori called after him; I gave her a wave of reassurance, and fingered the knife in my pocket.
The two walked ahead of me and Jacqui as we headed towards the first cluster of climbable trees. The woods were fairly thick on either side but I could still hear the clatter and clang of pans at the campsite.
"What about this one?" I ask Sofia, pointing up at a small tree for them to start on. She shook her head.
"No way, that one's too small." I popped my hip, and raised my eyebrows at her.
"Too small, really? I bet you couldn't climb all the way up."
"I bet you couldn't climb all the way up that one," Carl interjected. He pointed towards a rather tall tree just in the next cluster behind some bushes.
"Oh, I bet I could." I say, watching as they head towards the cluster of bushes. "Kids," I mumble. Jacqui laughed at me as the rustle of them disappearing behind the trees sounded.
"Not too far you two," Jacqui said. "They never listen do th-"
Carl's scream was the first I heard. I didn't hesitate I just ran, Jacqui behind me. "Carl! Sofia!" They burst out from behind the bushes fear written all over their faces.
"What is it?" Jacqui asked as they ran up to us.
"Walker! There's a walker!" Yelled Sofia.
Jacqui's eyes widened, first in shock then in fear. I heard the snarl of it first and I pushed Jacqui towards the clearing. "Take them. Go!" Sofia and Carl ran first. I heard their yells echoing around the trees. "I'll be fine. Just go."
Jacqui ran then and I took a deep breath. I pushed forwards through the trees and then into the clearing. I could hear shouts of the others as I laid my eyes on the walker. It was bent on hands and knees, hunched over a deer. Guts were everywhere and it looked like it was having a good old feed. I pulled my knife from my pocket. If I could get close enough I could stab it in the head, right through the skull.
"Saskia!" That's if they didn't let it know I was behind it first. "Sask!" I sighed in frustration as they all emerged from the brush behind me. T-Dog, Shane, Rick, Dale and Glenn all with weapons in their hands. I didn't bat an eyelid when they asked me if I was ok, they knew better.
Shane had the gun levelled at the walkers head, my knife was ready in my palm in case it turned. The others followed. I heard Amy gasp from somewhere behind as the walker turned towards us. I stepped back, by knife not being suitable enough to strike with now that it had turned. I let the guys deal with it. They hit it with everything they had until Dale severed its head.
I glanced back at the deer as Dale spoke. "That's the first one we've had up here… they never come this far up the mountain."
"They're running out of food in the city…" Everyone turned silent at that comment.
A rustle broke the silence. Everyone's heads snapped up, their eyes darting from place to place. Shane had his gun pointed out to the trees, always the gun. I glanced back at the deer. Three arrows. That only meant one thing.
"Son of a bitch!" Daryl's back. "That's my deer," He seemed oddly calm. But I suppose that could always be the eye of the storm.
"Look at it, all gnawed on by this…" Yeah, definitely the eye of the storm. "Filthy! Disease-bearing! Motherless! Poxy bastard!" Each word ended with a kick to the already fallen walker's torso.
I turned from the scene and headed back to the RV. Everybody else was waiting by the RV. "Watch out," I say a smirk on my face. "Storm's coming."
Let's just say that things didn't get better from there. They told Daryl about Merle and of course all hell broke loose. Well what did they expect? Now it seems that we're losing the only people capable of shooting a gun to go and look for that idiot Merle Dixon. Great. Just great.