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Her dad's not home when Alex returns from the beehives smelling of smoke and honey, a compress held against the trio of stings on her neck. They're hardly a reason to stop working but Amelia has a tendency to be overprotective, so despite Alex's protests, she's sent to lie down for a while. In her room she finds new clothes piled on the bed, a sign that Richard and Ethan have finally returned, hopefully bringing with them the infamous Dr. Burke.
She puts down the compress and sorts through the stack. There are three pairs of pants, two long sleeved and four short sleeved shirts, socks, underwear, and a new raincoat, all of which are still encased in the plastic wrap from the catalogue company. It always takes several washes to get rid of the smell of plastic and until then the odour will hang over everyone like a synthetic cloud. There are also two shoeboxes containing new boots and sneakers. Alex wiggles her toes in anticipation. She's taken to going barefoot when her dad's not around because her old shoes pinch too much. Underneath the clothes is a slim package wrapped in white tissue paper.
Richard always brings her something that wasn't on the list, something she didn't know she wants or needs until it's hers. One time it was licorice even though sweets had been forbidden until they replaced their dentist. Sometimes it's souvenirs from the places he's visited like the Cherokee carving of the corn goddess or the snow globe from Switzerland. Her favourite were the ballet slippers. When she was eight she had spent more time twirling than standing still. Now the slippers hung on a nail over her bed and Alex still feels dizzy whenever she looks at them.
As she grew older, Alex could tell her dad disapproved of these gifts. He always thanked Richard for his thoughtfulness but when he insisted Richard shouldn't have gone to the trouble, he meant it; he wasn't trying to be polite. This puzzled Alex because Richard was her dad's closest confidant, the only one he trusted to carry Jacob's message into the world. And in all other things, Richard deferred to her dad's judgement.
People often asked why Richard was always the one who led the annual trip to bring back supplies and recruit new members. "Because Richard doesn't get distracted by worldly things," her dad continuously replied. Alex guessed that buying her frivolous presents might appear to contradict his answer.
Last time Richard had returned with a book in French for her called Le Petite Prince. His choice confused her because it looked like it was for someone much younger, plus she couldn't read French. He explained it was one of his favourite books and promised he or someone else would teach her French one day. From the illustrations she thought it was the story of a pilot who crashed his plane in the desert and meets a little boy who fell from the stars.
She never got a chance to examine it further. For some reason the book had annoyed her father more than any candy or trinket bestowed on her. Once Richard had left, he asked to see it and never gave it back. She had searched the house for days but couldn't find it anywhere. She found this strange because her dad encouraged her to read widely so why censor a book she couldn't even understand. Even a year later, Alex was afraid to bring it up because she sensed the matter had nothing to do with the book itself. Something else entirely was exchanged that day between Richard and her dad and she began to wonder if they were such good friends after all.
Whatever it was, it hadn't stopped Richard from bringing her presents. Alex unwraps the tissue paper to find a bundle of cloth. She knows immediately what they are and her face burns. She had been too shy to ask her dad to add them to their list, thinking she could make do another year with her undershirts. Had one of the women asked Richard to buy these for her or did he think to do this on his own? Two of the bras are white and made out of the softest cotton she has ever felt. The third one is lacy and the colour of butter with a tiny satin bow in the centre. She scoops them up and hides them in her drawer under her pyjamas.
She sits on the edge of her bed and stares at the dresser, then she stands and closes her bedroom door. She returns to the drawer and takes out the yellow bra. Her fingers tremble as she unbuttons her shirt. She drops it on the floor and removes her undershirt. She slips her arms through the straps and tugs the front down. It takes her a few tries to close the clasp in the back.
Standing straight, Alex studies herself in the mirror, then twists around to see her frame from the side. Although she has little for the bra to emphasize, she feels different, slender instead of scrawny, and though it makes no sense, stronger. More so than when she turned thirteen or got her period, she feels like a woman. She almost doesn't recognize the person staring back at her.
She undoes her ponytail and runs her fingers threw her hair, untangling the curls. It's getting longer and almost hides the bee stings clustered in a triangle halfway between her ear and her shoulder. They're sensitive but not painful. She touches them gently and sparks fly between each one. She closes her eyes and thinks this is what a kiss must feel like, a tiny fire that you don't want extinguished right away. Her eyes fly open when it's Richard's lips she imagines on her neck, his hands clasping her hips.
She's so startled by this image that she doesn't hear her dad come home until he's outside her door. "Alex?" he calls. "Can I come in?"
She fumbles for her shirt and clutches it to her chest. "Just a minute." She hurriedly dresses and ends up skipping a button but when she redoes it, she misses one again, so she leaves it like that and opens the door. "I was just about to try on my new clothes."
He steps into her room, briefly glancing at the mess on her bed. "Is everything there that we ordered?"
"Yes," she says, wondering if he thinks she sounds out of breath.
"Good." He comes closer and lifts her hair, tucks it behind her right ear and tilts her head so he can examine the stings. "I heard what happened at the hives. Amelia should have been more careful."
"It was my fault, I dropped a tray and upset the bees."
He releases her, satisfied that she was not mortally wounded. "Everyone's gathering at the hall to meet Dr. Burke. I want Ethan to take a look at you before the speeches."
"I'm fine."
"You're flushed."
She swallows. "I'm just excited about meeting Dr. Burke."
He lays the back of his hand against her forehead. He's testing for a fever but it feels like he's trying to read her thoughts. The more he scrutinizes her, the harder it is to stop thinking of Richard and she's certain this is as obvious as her pink cheeks. His hand lingers for what feels like a century, but then he pulls away and smiles. "Good." He squeezes her shoulder. "Her name's Juliet. You'll like her."
Her eyes narrow, then widen. It seems impossible but she thinks her dad is actually blushing. They seem to draw this conclusion simultaneously which only makes him go redder. He ducks his head, takes off his glasses, and busies himself cleaning them with a handkerchief. When he's done, he replaces them and his colour has returned to normal. "We'll leave in a few minutes." He turns to go, then calls over his shoulder, "You missed a button."
Alex closes her door and leans against it as she re-buttons her shirt again; this time her fingers cooperate. She returns to the mirror and confronts her reflection. Her metamorphosis was temporary. Seeing her dad has broken the spell and she looks like plain old Alex again. Nevertheless, she still feels different. When she mingles with the crowd at the hall later she finds that she carries herself in a new way, like she's been granted possession of a great mystery that only she has the power to solve.
When she sees Richard, she doesn't fall to pieces but she also doesn't join the group welcoming him back. She takes a seat in the middle between Bonnie and Greta. During the opening meditation, she tries to clear her mind but she can't concentrate. Her thoughts keep returning to him. Does he have a girlfriend? How old is he? How long will he be home this time?
She's distracted further when someone yanks on her hair. She whips her head around to glare at Karl who's sitting in the row behind her with a smirk on his face. He actually has the gall to be openly reading a comic book. She's tempted to poke Bonnie and bust him but instead she rolls her eyes to let him know how unimpressed she is with his rebellion. If only to make up for her hypocrisy, she steadies her breathing and fully devotes herself to the remainder of the meditation.
Her attention drifts again during her father's speech. She studies the woman seated beside him on the stage. Dr. Burke is not at all who she imagined. She looks like she stepped from Botticelli's palette, not a laboratory, and from her stunned expression it's apparent that they are not at all what the doctor had expected either. Alex can't help but check to see if Richard is as captivated by Juliet as her father. She searches and spots him standing off to the side, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. As soon as she finds him, his gaze drifts over the crowd and their eyes meet. When he winks at her, it's like she's been stung all over again.
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