A/N: Extreme boredom + excessive amounts of english homework due yesterday = complete and utter pointless, mindless (not so) funny one-shots.
Disclaimer: If I had a dime for every time I pretended I was Stephenie Meyer, I would be broke because I'm a good girl how writes disclaimers.
Emmett flopped into a chair at the table, spilling the contents of his taco day special everywhere.
"Very smooth, Em." Jasper said dryly as he threw his bottle cap at Emmett's head. Emmett shrugged and turned to kiss Rosalie on the cheek.
Alice and Rosalie were going over study cards for a history midterm that afternoon. Jasper was reading a new mystery novel of his. Edward was listening to music, and Bella was struggling to stick the straw into her juice box.
"Urg! It's too big to fit in the hole!" She cried exasperatedly.
Emmett snickered, "That's what she said."
Jasper humoured him with a small chuckle while everyone else rolled his or her eyes. Bella abandoned her juice box and snuck a sip of Edward's diet coke.
"Hey, I wasn't finished with that." He frowned at her playfully. Emmett startled them all by slamming his fist on the table.
"That's what he said!"
Rosalie cuffed the back of his curly head, "Emmett, enough. You aren't that funny."
Jasper put his book into his backpack and pulled a carton of yogurt toward him. Alice peered inside it as he peeled off the foil lid.
"What flavour is that?" She wrinkled her nose.
"Banana."
"Eww, it's all yellow and goopy."
"That's what she said." Everyone groaned, except Emmett who was grinning like madman.
Edward stood up, pulling Bella along with him.
"We're leaving." The two started to walk away when Alice jumped up and called out,
"Wait! I'm coming too!"
Emmett guffawed, "That's what they said."
Jasper shook his head and silently left, leaving Rosalie alone with the Gag Man.
They stared at each other for a few moments, before-
"Hey, Rose, can I have a bite of your taco?"
"Right." Rosalie snapped, snatching her bag and stalking out of the cafeteria.
Emmett just giggled immaturely and got up to follow her.
A/N: Sigh... back to doing homework.
If you read this; STOP THE INJUSTICE, LEAVE A REVEIW!!!