A/N: This is based on the last couple of scenes of the finale, but in the future, if that makes any sense.
Olivia took one final look at the monument to the city that had been home for so many years. The place that had helped shape and mold her into the woman she was. The place that had brought her both joy and sorrow. She felt a twinge of sadness now that she was finally leaving it completely behind. But, at the same time, happiness, and relief that she could do it the way she wanted to. On her own terms. She crossed the street and saw the SUV pull up.
Fitz got out the car. "Hi."
She smiled. "Hi."
"Are you ready," he asked.
"Yes. Let's go home."
"About that," he said with a sheepish smile. He opened the car door and their eleven and five year old daughters, Jasmine and Simone jumped out of the car, hugging her.
"Hey sweethearts," she said, bending down to hug them. Her daughters. Sometimes she couldn't believe she was a mother. In fact, a part of her didn't want to be. But, that all changed after a night of them actually talking to each other.
Olivia sat on the floor, drowning her sorrows in a bottle of wine and Sade. Her husband wasn't home, and she had no idea where he was. She just knew that he said that he had to get away from her. And, she couldn't blame him. Their last argument was beyond horrible. She still had no idea why she had thrown that glass at him. All she remembered was pouring herself a drink to drown out his voice. The next thing she knew she was hurling a glass at his head. He had moved just in time to avoid it hitting him. She looked at the glass shattered over the floor. She would have to eventually clean that up. But, she wouldn't move from that spot until he got home. Not that everything would be fine once he got there, but he would be there. They had been in an awful place for weeks. And, she had no idea how to get out of it. Things were so bad this time around that they were no longer sleeping in the same bed. He had moved into the guest room a couple of days prior. And, she hated it. No matter how many times they tried, they just couldn't make their relationship work. They had tried so many times and failed. And, she just didn't want to fail anymore. Not after she had taken such a huge leap of faith and finally married him. She wanted her marriage to work. She had dreamed for so long about marrying him, while simultaneously thinking that it would never haapen, that she just couldn't imagine finally doing it for it not to work out.
She poured herself another glass of wine and replayed, "Bulletproof Soul." The smooth richness of the wine mixed with the same richness of Sade's voice lulled her to a false peace that allowed her to close her eyes and finally sleep.
She woke up to Fitz carrying her into the master bedroom. He placed her on the bed and spread a blanket over her. When he turned to leave, she whispered just loud enough for him to hear. "Stay."
He turned back around and faced her.
"Please."
"Let me go turn the radio off."
"Let it play," she said, afraid that if he walked out of the room that night, he would eventually walk out of her life forever.
He looked at her for a moment, before removing his clothes and joining her in bed. They were still facing away from each other. And, she knew he wanted to know why she had asked him to stay if nothing was going to change. And, there was nothing she could tell him. She heard "No Ordinary Love" start to play. She had listened to it a lot that night. Each time, it made her think about them. Their love wasn't ordinary at all, and sometimes it seemed like it was destined to fail. And, she didn't want that at all. Something had to give. Almost without any thought she turned over and hugged him from behind and started kissing on his neck.
He turned over and stopped her. "You're drunk," he said.
She climbed on top of him, straddling him. "Not that drunk." She leaned down to kiss him, but once again, he thwarted her attempt.
"You don't know what you're doing."
"Trying to have sex," she said.
He placed his hands on her hips. "This isn't going to solve anything."
"You don't know that," she protested.
"Our problem has never been here," he said as he caressed her thighs. "But, here." He placed a finger on her lips. "You don't talk to me, Liv."
She sighed and sat up straight.
"You're so used to running when it comes to us. And now that we're married, you can't run the way you're used to, so you retreat. You hold everything in, until you start resenting me. And, when you do talk, you talk at me or yell."
"Fitz, this isn't all on me."
"I know that."
"You have faults, too."
"I know that."
"So, why are you only pointing out mine?"
"Because I want you to point out mine. I want you to talk to me."
She knew it was the alcohol that had her feeling free enough to express her feelings. "You have a tendency to make everything about you. You want your dreams to be my dreams, too. And that is fine when we're at work. But, that can't fly here. Our dynamic at home is different. So, you can't make decisions without me. I know I suck at this whole marriage thing, but even I know that."
He chuckled.
She smiled. "That's all I can think of right now," she told him.
"Well, when you think of something else just tell me."
"Okay." She placed her hands on his abs.
He took her hands in his. "Why did you throw that glass at me, Liv?"
She cast her eyes down, because she was truly ashamed of her actions. "I don't know," she replied honestly. "I was just tired of hearing your voice. I don't even remember what you said. I don't know...I guess I just snapped. I don't know."
"Liv, we've never been violent with each other before. I don't want us to start."
"I don't either," she replied quietly. "I'm so sorry. It won't happen again."
"Forgiven. Now, we can talk about the conversation I was trying to have?"
"Fitz…I really don't want to." She didn't want to face the harsh truths. What if they discovered that they weren't meant to be? That there was no way for them to work.
"Livvie, we have to. There's no way for us to work, if we don't talk."
She sighed and moved off his body.
"Now, we were talking about having kids."
"I don't know if I want them," she said quietly, refusing to look at him.
"I gathered that when I realized you were still on birth control. We said we were going to try."
"No. You said you wanted to try. You never asked me what I wanted."
"I just assumed. We've talked about us having kids before. You never said you didn't want them," Fitz reminded her.
"The idea was nice. And, it always seemed to be in some hypothetical magical land. It honestly seemed like we'd never get here, to this point. But, I don't know. I might be horrible like my mom."
He sat up after pulled her onto his lap. "Was your mom always horrible?"
She turned sideways so that she was resting in his arms with her body pressed against his chest. "Not at first. Looking back, she was a good mom when I was a child. It was only after I was an adult, and discovered all of the lies and realized who she really was. It was such a big disappointment once I realized who she really was, and that my whole life had been a lie," she explained.
He kissed her forehead. "I'm sorry."
"And, it was then when she stopped trying to be a good mother. Hell, she wasn't even a bad mother. I would have at least settled for that. She didn't want to be my mother at all, anymore. And, that's what hurts the most. She never wanted me, Fitz. I was an inconvenience for her. And, once I was an adult, she didn't even try to hide it, anymore. I don't want that. I don't want to be that."
"Liv, you're naturally loving. You don't realize it, but you're nurturing. You take care of the people around you. And, you don't even have to. You just do."
She sighed.
"But, I won't pressure you. When you're ready. If you're ever ready."
"Thank you," she replied with an exhale and full release of tears.
"Hey. Hey. What's that?"
"I didn't think we would come to an agreement like this," she said, wiping her eyes.
Her statement shocked him. "Am I that unreasonable?"
"You want what you want, like everyone else. And, you've wanted us to have kids for a long time."
"I've wanted you longer. Yes, I would love to have kids with you. But, I love you. And, I want to spend my life with you more than anything else."
She laid her head on his shoulder. "I'm going to need your help," she finally whispered.
"What?"
"Navigating being a parent."
"What do you mean?" Fitz looked at her.
"I won't say yes, and I won't say no, but if it happens…"
"Are you sure?" Fitz asked, trying to hold in his happiness.
She nodded. "Yes."
He grinned and kissed her.
"Now, can we have sex?" She asked with exasperation.
Fitz cupped her face kissed her, deeply.
"You've also been drinking," she said, tasting the scotch on his tongue.
"Not as much as you," he said. He removed her clothes and flipped her on her back. He kissed every inch of her body the way that only he could, and they made love until she shed tears, grateful for their love, and that they were going to try as hard as they could to stay together forever. That semi drunken night saved their marriage, and led to them having two incredible little girls.
She gathered them up in her arms, hugging them close. "I thought you girls were supposed to be with Auntie Abby," she said, eyeing Fitz. "So, that daddy and I could finish packing and have some alone time."
"Daddy said he was taking us to see a surprise," Simone exclaimed with her arms still around her mother.
"Really Fitz," she said, knowing exactly what this surprise was.
"What? They should see it at least once before we leave for good," he said, defending his decision.
She stood with each of the girls on either side of her. "It's bad enough they know you were president. And, that their brother and sister's mom was president, too. They're going to think they're not normal. And, isn't that why we're moving? So, they can get some normal more than just during the summer and Christmas?"
"Come on, Mom," Jasmine pleaded. "Dad's surprises are always good."
"And, he promised," Simone added, looking up at her with pleading eyes. Pleading eyes that always broke Olivia. She had definitely inherited her eyes, and she knew exactly how to use them to get what she wanted.
"Daddy never breaks a promise," Fitz reminded her.
"Fine," she relented, ushering them towards the SUV.
They gleefully climbed in the back seat, ready for whatever surprise their father had for them. Just as Olivia was getting in the car, Fitz stopped her and kissed her.
"Seriously," Jasmine exclaimed. "You're outside. People can see you. This is so embarrassing," she grumbled and covered her face with her hand.
Olivia chuckled at her overly dramatic child.
"We better not ever let her see that video of you saying goodbye to me on the White House lawn," Fitz said, loud enough for Jasmine to hear as he climbed into the SUV behind Olivia.
"I've seen it," Jasmine informed them. "And, so have my friends. It's horrible."
"I'm sorry," Olivia said, reaching back and taking her daughter's hand in hers. And, she really was. She remembered the day when five-year-old Jasmine came home in tears, wanting to know what a mistress was.
"Jazzy, honey, you've got to stop crying so you can tell me what's wrong," Olivia said as she held onto her crying little girl.
She looked up at Fitz for an explanation, but he only shrugged his shoulders.
"How long has she been like this?" Olivia asked as she sat on the couch and cradled her in her arms.
"Since I picked her up," Fitz said as he sat down beside them, placing his hand on her back. "I asked her how was school, and she started crying."
Olivia rubbed her back and tried her best to soothe her daughter, so that she could tell them what was wrong. "You know Mommy and Daddy can fix anything, right? But, you have to tell us what's wrong. Okay?"
Finally Jasmine sat up and wiped her eyes. "What's a mistress?"
Olivia and Fitz looked at each other, knowing what this was about. Both of them wondering why they never figured that their sins would touch their innocent little girl.
"Connor said that his mommy said Mommy is a mistress. And, so did my other friends."
"First of all, those kids are not your friends," Fitz said.
"Don't tell her that. They're just repeating what they heard at home," Olivia said.
"So, what does it mean? The way they said it, it has to be bad, right? It made me feel bad."
Olivia took a deep breath and tried to figure out how they were going to explain this to a five year old. "A long time ago," she began. "Mommy and daddy loved each other at a time when we shouldn't have, because daddy was still married to Mellie. And, when a man is married, but in love with another lady, people call that lady a mistress. And, yes, it is usually bad. But, that's not how it was for us."
"That's because I never saw your mother as my mistress," Fitz interjected. "She has always been the love of my life. Always. It's just when I was president, we thought I had to stay married to Mellie and love mommy in secret, instead of divorcing Mellie and marrying mommy like I wanted to."
"But, you're married," Jasmine pointed out.
"Now, we are. So, don't worry about what the kids at school say, just know that we love each other," Olivia told her.
"And, we love you," Fitz added.
That night while they were in bed, Fitz had turned to Olivia, "You want to home school her?"
"What? No," Olivia exclaimed. "We can't teach her to run whenever things get tough. But, if it doesn't get better, we'll consider other options." That was when they both seriously started considering moving away from the politics of the city to Vermont for good.
"We're here," Fitz said when they stopped in front of the Smithsonian.
As they made their way through the portrait gallery, they could see Simone growing more and more restless and uninterested.
"This is a boring surprise," she complained with a pout.
"No, it's not," Jasmine disagreed. "This is all the presidents ever. That's President Teddy Roosevelt," she said, pointing to his picture. "That's who Teddy's named after. Right dad?"
"Right," Fitz said.
"He doesn't look like Teddy," Simone said, looking at the picture.
Fitz and Olivia laughed, and Jasmine continued her little history lesson.
"Anyway, he became president when he was forty-two making him the youngest president to take office and the second youngest ever elected, right behind President John F. Kennedy, who was forty-three when he was elected," Jasmine explained to her little sister who had tuned her out somewhere around "forty-two." She had no interest in history or politics, not when there was gymnastics and ice cream in the world. But, Jasmine was such a history nerd. That was something she got from both Olivia and Fitz, and the fact that Olivia only read her history books as a baby. Fitz had intervened with Simone, and read her actual children books.
They lingered behind the girls, keeping a watchful eye on them as they made their way through the gallery. Fitz watched with pride as they finally made their way to the "surprise". Their eyes widened, and they could only stare in amazement at the portrait of their mother hanging in the National Portrait Gallery.
They stood behind the girls and Fitz placed his hand on Jasmine's shoulder. "They decided to honor your mother with a portrait because of her influence in the country. She is behind the election of two presidents, multiple senators, members of Congress, and Supreme Court Justices. And, she is the reason behind a hearing that helped give the country back to the people."
"We the people," Jasmine said in amazement. "Is that why the Constitution is the background?"
"That. And, because daddy took me to see the real one. And, we got to touch it. So, the Constitution is even more special to me," Olivia explained, remembering that day.
"Can you take us to see the Constitution?" Jasmine asked Fitz, excitedly.
"Yeah," Simone chimed in. "I want to touch it, too." Then, she tugged on Jasmine's hand, pulling her down towards her. "What's the Constitution," she whispered.
"One day when we come back to visit," Fitz told them.
"Okay," Jasmine said. She looked back at the portrait. "This is cool. You're cool, mom," she said, looking up at Olivia. "And beautiful. And, I want to be just like you when I grow up."
"Me too," Simone added.
"So, no one wants to be like me. My picture is in here, too. I was president, you know," Fitz joked.
"Because of mom," Jasmine reminded him.
Olivia kissed both of her girls and wiped a tear away before laying her head on Fitz's shoulder. She looked up at him. "You were right. They needed to see it."