Author's Note: I strongly suggest listening to What Sober Couldn't Say by Halestorm while reading this. I have had an idea to write this story for a while, but didn't have enough time to make it because of my other to story's I have out. This is a TWO-SHOT!
P.S The parts in italics are the song lyrics.
(CHLOE'S P.O.V)
Headed for a blackout
Hurting like hell
Finding my way to bottom of the bottle
Packing up my suitcase
Leaving no trace
One step closer with every swallow
It's nine o'clock at night and I am just wandering the streets around town.
I know that I should be home now, but I don't want to be alone.
Everyday when I wake up, she's gone. Than every night when I go to sleep, she isn't there either. I barely see her anymore. But when I do get to see her it feels rushed, like she never has time for me.
As I am walking I stop in front of a bar deciding to go in and get a drink. After the first one I realized that I should go home if I was gonna get drunk.
When I arrived at the apartment, I called out Beca's name. There was no answer. I knew she wouldn't be here. She is to busy working these days. She has no time for me. I went into the kitchen and pulled out a bottle of Jack and started to drink it.
Getting drunk was the least of my problems.
A deafening silence
Like you like me
Where you want me
Saying nothing
But not this time
I'm gonna say
I'm gonna say
It was around 10:30 when I had finished drinking two and a half bottles.
I was definitely drunk now, and the Alcohol wasn't helping the pain. I missed Beca, I wish she was here. right now, I craved her touch. But I knew she wouldn't be home till later tonight. Than when she gets here, she would be to tired and go to bed right away.
Beca didn't care about me anymore. I was just her safety. I can't even remember the last time she said that she loved me, or the last time we kissed.
I wish I could tell her how I feel right now, but that wouldn't change a thing.
What sober couldn't say
Couldn't break through
Under the influence of you
Incoherent, truth serum
Just enough to make me bullet proof
I'm so over this love gone violent
I'm drunk and brave enough to say
What sober couldn't say
I was pacing around the room now, well to the best of my ability since I was drunk. I kept falling down and crashing into things. I had already broken 2 lamps and knocked over a chair.
I want to talk to Beca, so I call her. It probably wasn't the best idea, but I couldn't stop myself.
The phone rang a few times, than her voice mall came on. I wasn't expecting her to pick up anyway's.
Than Beca's voicemail came on "Sorry I couldn't get to the phone right now, please leave a message." Than after she said that I waited for the beep, so that I could begin talking.
Criminal in my mind
I've been doing time
Believing in the lie
That you still loved me
Making up for
The slamming of the door
Always wanting more but never giving
I took a deep breath and spoke "Hi, Beca it's me Chloe" I said my voice slurring from the alcohol. "When we first got together, I believed that you loved me and that we would be happy together. But- But things just aren't the same anymore, I love you Beca, but you don't love me anymore. Do you know how many nights I have been lying in bed crying, thinking about you and me, what's happening between us? I would try and stay up just so I could talk to you or even see you. But as you would come home, you would go right to bed and be up to early for me in the morning. We aren't the same anymore Beca." I took a second to collect my thoughts.
Sick of crying
Tired of trying
Always buying
Into every kiss
But not this time
I'm gonna say
"I-I just am tired of being your safety, I'm tired of trying to do things with you and you having to cancel because of work. I care about you Beca, but it's clear that you don't. I miss you so much. Not seeing you everyday hurts like hell. Not being able to kiss you or seeing you when I wake up is killing me. God, there is nothing more in the world that I want than is for you to be here right now, and for us to be sleeping in our bed, in each others arm holding each. But instead, I am here at home, alone. I wish you had still loved me Beca, that things were the way they used to be. But there not, if you had just wanted me out of your life than you should have just told me. Figuring it out just hurt to much. But you wont have to worry about me anymore, because by tomorrow Beca, I will have moved on, I will be out of our house. You wont have to deal with me again. I just called to let you know, that I love you and I only want the best for you. I'm sorry that I wasn't enough." And with that being said I hung up and burst into tears on the couch.
What sober couldn't say
Couldn't break through
Under the influence of you
Incoherent, truth serum
Just enough to make me bullet proof
I'm so over this love gone violent
I'm drunk and brave enough to say
What sober couldn't say
I knew I would regret that in the morning, but it didn't hurt that much now and that's all that mattered. I doubt she will actually check her message from me.
I want her here right now, so bad. She normally doesn't get home until 12:30 a.m, and right now it's only 11:38 p.m, I wont be able to stay awake till than.
I felt the urge to throw up, so I got up off the couch and tried to go over to the bathroom. As I stood up, I fell into the glass coffee table smashing it and sending glass everywhere.
I didn't really feel anything at first. I didn't notice what happened until I went to get my self up and felt a sharp sooting pain in my hand. I looked down and saw lots of blood flowing out.
But I felt sick so I stood up, ignoring the pain, and walked over to the bathroom. I left a trail of bloody foot prints from the carpet to here because of the cuts on my foot. As soon as I walked into the bathroom I couldn't make it to the toilet so I threw up in the sink.
Ooh...
This is my intervention
Getting your attention
Ooh...
I'm gonna say
I'm gonna say
I'm gonna say
After I threw up I fell down onto the floor. The pain from the fall into the table hurt to much to stand.
So I allowed myself to collapse. That probably wasn't a good idea because when I fell, I fell face down and slammed my nose off the ground. I think that I had broken it. I reached up to touch and blood was coming out. I was starting to get dizzy and started to get a headache.
This was going to hurt tomorrow. I would need to find someone to drive me to the doctors. I was definitely going to have to get my nose checked out.
Maybe Beca could at least help me stand up, but she won't even notice that I am not in bed with her. I guess I will just have to stay here on the floor all night.
I was so sick of this with Beca, I guess I am just done. I give up on trying to fix things.
I quickly past out after that, letting my head hit the ground again.
What sober couldn't say
Couldn't break thru
Under the influence of you
Incoherent, truth serum
Just enough to make me bullet proof
I'm so over this love gone violent
I'm drunk and brave enough to say
What sober couldn't say
What sober couldn't say
I'm so over this love gone violent
I'm drunk and brave enough to say
I'm over this
So over this
(BECA'S P.O.V)
It was sometime around 11:50 when I left work tonight. I got to leave early and I was happy about that. don't get me wrong, I loved producing music, but I just haven't gotten to spend time with her in forever.
There is nothing more that I wanted to do than to go home and snuggle into my girlfriend in bed, and fall asleep beside her.
I doubt she notice this, but every night before she goes to bed after she falls asleep, I give her a small kiss. I wouldn't be able to go a day with out kissing her. I am lucky to have some one like that.
I felt bad though. I hadn't talked to her in a while, or spent much time with her. But I would make that up to her once we got this record deal done with. Than I would have more time off, and wouldn't work as late.
As soon as I got into my car I checked my phone. I had left it in there all day.
When I saw that I had a message from Chloe, I couldn't help but feel happy. I hadn't talk to her in so long that I just now wanted to her her voice.
So I played back the message.
"Hi, Beca it's me Chloe. When we first got together, I believed that you loved me and that we would be happy together. But- But things just aren't the same anymore, I love you Beca, but you don't love me anymore. Do you know how many nights I have been lying in bed crying, thinking about you and me, what's happening between us? I would try and stay up just so I could talk to you or even see you. But as you would come home, you would go right to bed and be up to early for me in the morning. We aren't the same anymore Beca. I-I just am tired of being your safety, I'm tired of trying to do things with you and you having to cancel because of work. I care about you Beca, but it's clear that you don't. I miss you so much. Not seeing you everyday hurts like hell. Not being able to kiss you or seeing you when I wake up is killing me. God, there is nothing more in the world that I want than is for you to be here right now, and for us to be sleeping in our bed, in each others arm holding each. But instead, I am here at home, alone. I wish you had still loved me Beca, that things were the way they used to be. But there not, if you had just wanted me out of your life than you should have just told me. Figuring it out just hurt to much. But you wont have to worry about me anymore, because by tomorrow Beca, I will have moved on, I will be out of our house. You wont have to deal with me again. I just called to let you know, that I love you and I only want the best for you. I'm sorry that I wasn't enough."
By the end of that I was in tears. I could definitely tell she was drunk. She kept slurring her words together.
I hated that she thought that I didn't care about her anymore or that I didn't love her. How could she think that she isn't enough, if anything that would be me. She is the one who should be happy, and deserves more than this. But I can see where she got those thoughts rom. I have been a terrible girlfriend lately.
I think the worst part about it all though is that she is going to move out. I can't handle her leaving me. I love her to much, I would be an absolute mess if she did.
I looked at what time that message was sent and it was about only 10 minutes ago.
Which meant that she still might be up if I can get home quick enough. So I turned the car on and drove as fast as I could to our house.
When I got there I opened the door and called out her name, but I got no answer which meant that she was probably asleep. I don't want her to leave me.
So I stepped inside and turned on the lights. As I walked into the living room I noticed 3 empty bottles of Jack, 2 smashed lamps and one of our chairs were flipped over. As I walked over to fix the chair, I saw our glass coffee table smashed and lots of blood.
I began to worry. I walked over to glass and saw a trail of bloody foot prints. I followed them and it lead me to the bathroom.
As I walked in I saw Chloe lying on the ground with blood everywhere. There was a pool of blood by her face, her t-shirt was stained with blood and her arms and feet were all cut up with glass stuck in them.
"Chloe" I called out, but she didn't answer. I walked over to her and lifted her head up and her nose was swollen and there was blood dripping from her nose. Not to mention but she had bruising all under eyes. It looked like she had broken her nose.
"Chloe" I said again shaking her shoulder, I had to take her to the hospital. She wasn't waking up. I did't know what else to do so I called 911. I explained the situation to them and they sent an ambulance over.
They arrived 3 minutes later and took her to the hospital. I followed in my car.
On the outside I may have been clam, but on the inside I was freaking out.
When I arrived at the hospital I called the record label and told them that I wouldn't be in work for a few day because I needed to take care of Chloe. About a half hour later a women came out into the waiting room and told me her condition.
She needed stitches for some of the cuts from the glass and other would heals on there own. Also she had broken her nose and they would have to do surgery on it, but they couldn't do that until her concussion went away. They decided to keep her over night, and she would go home with me in the morning.
I asked if I could go see and they told me which room she was in.
I walked in and saw Chloe sleeping on the bed with a whole bunch of machines hooked up to her. She also had two black eyes and her nose was taped up. Along her arms were cuts and some stitches.
I went up to her bed and sat down in the chair beside it. I took Chloe's hand in mine and kissed the back of it. They had an IV in her arm to get all the alcohol out of her system.
I just sat there and watched her sleep. She looked so relaxed and calm. Even with her nose broken and bent up, she was still the most beautiful girl to me. I eventually grew tired and fell asleep in the chair beside her holding her hand.
I wanted to be there when she woke up. Than she could see that I cared, and maybe I could convince her not to move out and leave me. I need her and she can't just go. I love her to much to let her just walk out.