Jessica's Mental Turmoil
Life has become so unfair. Bella's been at school for like one day, and already every guy who looks at her turns into a puppy and looks as if he'd do anything in order for her to notice him. Even Mike follows here around all the time, and he stares at her the rest of it. It's not as if she's better looking than me. I sure hope she doesn't think she is!
Why do I have to spend all this time trying to get attention from Mike, and barely ever succeed, and all she has to do is just be at school? Even Edward Cullen is starting at her! In the two years he's been here, I hadn't seen him look at anyone besides his siblings and the teachers, and now… he can't seem to keep his eyes off her.
And why? She really isn't even pretty. So why the hell are they all staring at her as if she's some kind of supermodel? Still, it might have an advantage… Maybe, if I can manage to be nice to her, become her friend – sort of- Mike will notice me too. It's worth a try anyway… Even though I'd rather have Edward notice me. He's so much hotter than Mike! He doesn't seem to be interested in her though… he looks as if he's frustrated. I wonder why that is… It doesn't make any sense.
Even if he's not interested in her, what is he looking at her for?! Ugh! I've seen him look frustrated before, but he was staring into nothingness then. So why would he be staring at a person now? I've really never seen him look at anyone of the students here, let alone stare at one of them. I wish he'd stare at me though! But I'd better point my arrows at Mike, at least he dates! I don't know why Edward doesn't!
It's as if he thinks he's better than us! Well, he is better looking than anyone but his scary-looking sister, but that doesn't make him better overall! Or maybe… maybe he's gay! It would make sense… most good-looking guys seem to be gay. At least I'm positive Mike isn't. Or he's hiding it remarkably well. Nope, it's just impossible. He's paying far too much attention to Bella to be gay. And I wouldn't stand a chance with him if he was.
Ugh! But how am I supposed to make sure he looks at me instead of her? Hmm… if he keeps staring at her like this, he's bound to try to talk to her too… and if he does, I'll just make sure I'm with her. Half of the time she doesn't seem to be listening when someone talks to her, so if he asks her a question, I'll cut in. Mike will have to pay attention to me then!
Still… what if he doesn't listen to me and stares at her all the time? I'd make a fool of myself! Maybe I should wait and see how she reacts to him. If she's not interested in him, then he's bound to give up. Or try to make her jealous. And who better to make someone jealous with than a friend? If he gives me a chance, maybe I can make him fall in love with me.
Well… not maybe, I know I can. I would manage to get Mike's attention away from Bella. I would succeed.