Hey! Okay this is my first shot at a crack fic. It probably sucks though.Warning:Characters OOC
Disclaimer:No I don't own Naruto! Happy now? Though I really wish I did
(Gaara's POV)
"GAARA! WAKE UP!"
"KANKURO ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US ALL KILLED!"
"Yes."
WHACK!
"Ow! Temari! That hurt you know!" Kankuro whined
"SHUT UP OR I'LL USE SAND COFFIN ON YOU!" I yelled sitting up and holding my head. The house became utterly silent after that. God the sun was too bright and the birds were too loud. Staggering I opened my bedroom door and held on to the wall as I made my way to the bathroom. My sister and brother were downstairs fighting over something. Again. Typical day right? Wrong!
After shutting the door to the bathroom my stomach churned. God what the hell happened to me last night? I asked myself as I coughed up the last of what was in my stomach. Sighing slightly I splashed water on my face and rinsed out my mouth. Glancing at the mirror to see if Temari's eyeliner had smeared...
"WHAT THE HELL!!!!!"
(Normal POV)
Temari and Kankuro flinched at Gaara's yelling and rushed upstairs to see what was wrong before he murdered them. Kicking the bathroom door open Kankuro doubled over in laughter. Instead of Gaara freaking out in the bathroom, it was a girl with dark wild red almost auburn hair with dark jade eyes.And surprisingly eyebrows.Kankuro stopped laughing as his eyes trailed up the female Gaara's body before turning away in a blush earning a whack from Temari. Turning beat red Gaara hurriedly grabbed a towl to cover his newly aquired breasts
"Kankuro you pervert get out of here!" Temari growled warningly at her brother and grabbed Gaara's hand pulling him/her out of the bathroom and down the hall into Temari's room.
"NO! Temari I don't wanna go in there! Where's my sand? It's supposed to be protecting me!" Gaara whined struggling to break free before being thrust into his older sister's bedroom. Or in Kankuro's words the room of hell.
"Oh don't be a baby Gaara-chan. This is the only room you're safe in from that pervert Kankuro. Besides You can't go running around the village in only a pair of boxers." Temari said fishing through her drawers before pulling out 2 lacy black bras. Gaara whimpered and hid his face under the pillows.
"Fine no lacy bras for you then. How 'bout a sports so it just slides over your head like a shirt." She said pulling out a blood red sprts bra and glanced over at Gaara.
"HEY! No Fair Gaara, your boobs are bigger than mine!' Temari whined playfully dragging her little brother out from under the fort of pillows.
"I'M NOT WEARING A BRA OR A SKIRT!
"TOO BAD!"
"WOULD YOU TWO GIRLS STOP YOUR CAT FIGHT! THE GAMES ON!" Kankuro yelled from downstairs.
Later after many arguments, Temari had finally got Gaara dressed in a pair of black shorts and a blood red t-shirt and had combed his hair into two twin ponytails.
"Kankuro! You can come up now!" She yelled. Gaara shook his head repeatedly.
"I don't want him to see me like this."
"He alread saw you partialy naked so whats the big idea?" Temari said but Gaara was already jumping out the window.
(Gaara's POV)
Damn, I look like a fool when I find the bastard who did this to me he's gonna die slowly and painfully I thought walking down the streets of Suna, trying to ignore the catcalls from perverted men all around me.
"Kabuto-kun look at that pretty girl over there, Bring her to me." A familiar snake like voice said girlishly. I turned to glare at them and was disgusted to find Orochimaru and his lap bitch Kabuto Yakushi. That wasn't even the worst of it. They. Were. Looking. Straight. At. Me. Both of them waggled their fingers at me and I took off running.
(Normal POV)
Orochimaru grinned, knowing he would enjoy this chase for his perverted mind was already swimming with new thoughts about ditching Kabuto and having this new girl.
Kabuto on the other hand was not too pleased as he followed Orochimaru's order to follow the girl. Damn her. Stealing Lord Orochimaru from me! He thought angrily his white bangs falling into his black eyes.
Gaara cursed under his breath as Kabuto followed him and that stupid bra was getting tight cutting into his skin. Greatful that he was wearing shorts, Gaara leapt on to a hanging ladder hopefully fooling the idiot but not succeeding.
Kabuto followed Gaara grabbing her from behind accidently squeezing one of her breasts. Gaara scowled turning around with a forceful punch to Kabuto's nose before running off again. "Pervert!" she screeched.
Orochimaru appeared beside the unconsious Kabuto and let out a giggle. "Sorry Kabuto, but she's more perfect for me than you are. I'll just have to catch her myself." He said licking his lips with his snake-like tounge.
Damn. Where am I supposed to go where that stupid Snake won't follow me? Gaara though pushing back his hair. He glanced around his jade eyes falling on the newest issue of The Konoha Times. That's it! Konoha. He thought and took off.
(Sakura's POV)
They were at it they stop fighting for Ten minutes? I wondered. Next thing you know they'd be dropping thier pants to see which of them was bigger, and I seriously didn't want to be around for that. "Kakashi get here already or I'll throw you of a cliff." I muttered to no one in particular.
Naruto stopped moving and stared at something near the Gates. "Whoa. Who's the chick?"
Sasuke flinched, I could tell he was hoping it wasn't another crazed fangirl. Turning my gaze to follow Naruto's I saw a dark red-head running straight towards us. To tell the truth we weren't paying enough attention that we didn't even hear Kakashi pop up behind us.
Not that it was odd to see some stranger running into Konoha, the red hair though longer did look familar. But then again it couldn't be.Whoever it was just kept coming at us until she reached us and hid behind me.
Sasuke scowled. "Who are you?"
The girl returned the scowl. "If I told you, you wouldn't belive me."
Naruto bent down eyelevel with the girl and stared.
"Naruto don't be rude." I said bonking him on the head after I saw where his curlean eyes were trailing. The girl smiled slightly up at me.
"Whoever you are, why are you here?" Kakashi asked making the three of us jump.
"When did you get here Kakashi-sensei?!" Naruto exclaimed.
"He was here the whole time. And as for why I'm here, I'm being chased by that Snake-bastard" The red-head said calmly and Sasuke tensed.
Kakashi nodded. "Then I guess you'll be hiding out here for a while. You'll need a place to stay."
Naruto started jumping up and down yelling "Pick Me! Pick Me!"
"Naruto's too much of a pervert. And Sasuke would make you eat tomato's all the time." Kakashi said and smiled beneath his mask as Sasuke gave him a death-glare.
"So I guess you'll be staying with Sakura-chan." Naruto pouted and the redhead blushed.
I smiled ignoring the blush thinking Naruto must have grabbed her butt or something.
Fin
Yeah okay it probably sucked. Well hopefully on the next chapter it'll be better. R/R plz!
Fallin Out Of Control