Escape to Insanity
Sitting on the steps of Gotham Courthouse, she buried her face into the folds of her woolly black coat so that only her pale blue eyes showed above the collar. It was cold. The pale and bleak March sky above her was only just now beginning to lighten up as the sun crept over the horizon. She's been sitting on these cold concrete steps for about half-an-hour now, since six o'clock in the morning. Waiting.
Her colleagues called her Catherine. Her friends called her Kitty. Her parents, however, insisted on calling her Catherine Elizabeth. She preferred to be called simply Kitty Liz. Her parents were the kind of people who strongly believed in ideals and morals, and associating with the right crowd. It was only because of her family's connections that she was now Gotham's most-appreciated lawyer. And she hated it.
A strong gust of icy wind blew across the courtyard that separated The Courthouse from the street. She shivered, pulling her coat over her knees.
"Should have worn a hat," she mumbled to herself in annoyance, then immediately told herself off for complaining. Her parents were always complaining, it seemed, and her greatest fear was to turn into one of them - someone afraid to deviate from the norm. Perhaps it was too late already...?
She told herself it wasn't true. She needed to stop complaining and to start believing in herself because what she was about to do called upon all her self-confidence, and perhaps, even a hint of insanity. She fingered her business card in her coat pocket, running a finger over the razor blade taped to the other side...
Press vans began to arrive at around that moment. Clearly, the media also felt the need to arrive early. Better be safe than miss the trial of the century. If Kitty Liz were to miss it because they suddenly decided to change the schedule for safety purposes, she might just never forgive herself.
The press were arriving in masses now; reporters, photographers, cameramen. Kitty Liz found this strange. The trial was supposed to start at eight, so why was the media arriving so early? She got up off the icy steps, her behind rather numb. The energy of the crowd in the courtyard was now spreading to her. She jumped up and down a little bit, trying to warm up her frozen legs. The sun crawled over the rooftops ahead, bathing the courtyard with the brightest light. For a moment, everybody was blinded. Then, there was a scream.
"They are coming in through the side door!" a woman cried on the other side of the courtyard. There was a panicked commotion as all the reporters, photographers, and cameramen rushed forward to greet the police car that had just pulled in beside the left side of the building. It looked as if though Kitty Liz didn't show up two hours in advance for nothing - they were starting the trial an hour early. She watched the reporters crowd the police car in faint amusement. She knew only too well how this courthouse worked. The media would be locked out as soon as the defendant was inside. She entered the courthouse through the main door, intent on exchanging a few words, or perhaps items, with the defendant before the trial began.
People greeted her as she walked through the lobby. She nodded at them and smiled through gritted teeth.
"Miss Francis!" called out a fellow lawyer. "You're not here for the Joker's trial, are.. are you?" he added quickly, nervously.
Kitty Liz suddenly felt a strange surge of hate against this cowardly little lawyer. He was the kind that wouldn't dare be associated with the Joker even if the latter saved his life. Fearing that she didn't hide the look of disgust on her face all too well, she replied mysteriously "Who knows?" and walked away as quickly as possible.
Down the corridor, turn to the right, turn left. A multitude of voices could be heard coming from the direction of the side entrance, down the hall. Then the sound of the door shutting, and the voices fading. Kitty Liz quickened her pace. The press would be coming in through the main doors any second now. She turned another right corner, and came face to face with three people. Two of them were guards, who, judging by the looks on their faces, were just as surprised to see Kitty Liz at the moment as she was them. The person in the middle, however, did not seem to be fully aware of his surroundings. He stood there, looking into space, lost in his own thoughts. His scarred mouth formed a wicked smile. None of the videos, none of the pictures that Kitty Liz has seen (and there were plenty) could've prepared her for what she was seeing now. Even though he was clad in an orange jumpsuit instead of his usual purple attire, even though his hands were bound by handcuffs, he terrified her. He looked up at her, and their eyes met for the first time. Her horror increased two-fold. At the moment, he didn't have his horrible face-paint, and his hair was dirty-blonde instead of green. And yet he was even more terrifying like this, because he suddenly looked almost human. If it wasn't for the scars and the insane expression, he would have had a pleasant face, handsome even.
The moment was gone. One of the guards gave the Joker a rough shake, and mumbled, "Come on." They pushed past Kitty roughly, with a gruff "Excuse me," and continued down the corridor. A great rush of voices down the hallway brought Kitty Liz back to reality. The reporters would catch up to the Joker in a second, and she would lose her only chance to talk. She sped down the hallway in pursuit.
"Mr. -" she cried out, "Mr. Joker, may I have a word?"
They rounded a corner, and at that moment a male reporter ran full-speed into her, sending her flying into the wall.
"Mr. Joker, I have heard -" but he never finished his sentence. The rest of the press arrived, and his question was drowned out by tens of others. Kitty Liz was desperate now.
The Joker was surrounded from every possible direction.. except the wall. Taking action, fast, she dove between the wall and the guard on the Joker's right, much to the guard's dislike. She turned to face the Joker. Walking backwards, the only thing she needed to do now was to get the Joker to listen to her.
"Excuse me, Mr.-" Somebody shoved her from behind, almost knocking her off her feet. Catching herself, she said "Mr. J? May I call you Mr. J?"
The Joker gave her a look of slight amusement.
"No comment," he said sarcastically.
"I'm not a reporter!" Kitty Liz cried out desperately. The Joker looked up at her, "I'm a lawyer."
"OHHH," he replied, his sarcasm thickening. Then he looked away, clearly annoyed.
"Please, it has come to my attention that you do not have a lawyer for your defence-"
"Don't want one," Joker interrupted suddenly, "There is absolutely no service that you can provide that may interest me." He laughed a maniacal little laugh.
"Please," Kitty Liz continued, "you can plead the insanity plea-" But the Joker didn't let her finish her sentence once more. He turned to her, dark eyes gleaming, and said, in a voice barely above a whisper but in a voice more intimidating than anything Kitty has ever heard, "I'm not... crazy... And that kind of attitude is exactly the thing that makes lawyers so.. unattractive to me." And then he smiled at her, revealing yellowed teeth.
"Well... Well, then..." Kitty Liz began, digging her fingers into her coat pocket, "Here is my card, in case you, uh, change your mind."
She slipped her calling card out of her pocket, covering the razor blade with two of her fingers. But right before she placed the card into the chest pocket of the Joker's jumpsuit, she lifted her fingers just enough for the blade to catch the Joker's eye. They exchanged a knowing, understanding look at that moment, and suddenly, the whole group arrived at the courtroom door.
The guard at the great double-door, whose name-tag identified her as Samantha Leigh, let the Joker and the two guards accompanying him enter immediately. Then she smiled at Kitty Liz.
"Go ahead, Miss Francis."
Kitty Liz proceeded into the courtroom, knowing that the damage was done.
The voluminous room was filling up very quickly now. Kitty Liz knew who many of the people walking through the door had to be. The close ones of the Joker's victims. As they entered the room, every single one of them cast a dark look in the direction of the defendant's seat. Seeing this, Kitty Liz almost began to doubt herself. Who was she to be putting all of these innocent people in mortal danger? What, in God's name, was she doing? She shook her head, clearing those thoughts, and wondered instead what she would do if there were no seats left once everybody arrived. She stood to the side, waiting. Eventually, it seemed that no one else was coming. Everyone was seated, and immersed in conversation. She edged out of her corner, trying not to attract attention to herself. Carefully, she made her way past the first row of seats. An elderly man noticed her, and gave her an understanding smile. He moved his briefcase off the seat beside him, and Kitty Liz sat down, feeling grateful. Her seat was only a few meters away from that of the Joker.
The conversations were beginning to die down now, and there was a subdued feeling of apprehension in the air. At the back, Samantha was closing the big wooden doors. This was it. The trial of the century.
"All rise!" came the bailiff's loud and clear voice, announcing the judge's arrival.
The judge walked in. She was an elderly woman, with greying hair. Short and stocky, she always had a characteristic, steely glint in her grey eyes. The courtroom rose to greet her, the Joker getting out of his chair lazily. She walked to her booth, giving the room her usual steely glare.
"Judge Amber Whatts presiding," came the bailiff's clear voice again. Judge Whatts sat down, and the rest of the courtroom followed suit.
"Court is now in session," the judge said, with a strike of her gavel. She shuffled the papers in front of her. "Case number 45345. The Joker versus the city of Gotham. Is the defendant present?"
The Joker made an incoherent sound from his seat. Judge Whatts gave him a look of utter hate, and Kitty Liz wondered if this was the Joker's usual courtroom behaviour.
"Is the defendant present?" the judge repeated again, in a scathing, threatening voice.
"Yes, Your Honour," the Joker mumbled back nasally.
"Is the prosecution ready to present its case?" she demanded, glaring at the desk on the Joker's right.
"Yes, Your Honour," came the bright voice of a man sitting there. He was tall, lean, and dark, and just the way he talked and held himself already told Kitty Liz that the case was lost for the Joker. "My name is John Creed," he began, "and I believe that this man," he pointed dramatically to the Joker, "is the perfect example of everything that Gotham doesn't stand for. Greed. Violence. Insanity. Mercilessness." John Creed suddenly stood up, pushing away his chair with a force that almost tipped it over. He began to pace the floor in front of the jury, speaking with much emotion, and many more dramatic hand gestures, about the crimes the Joker's been accused of, and the innocent lives he's destroyed. By the time he was seated and silent, several people in the audience were quietly sniffing into their tissues, and dabbing at their eyes.
The Joker slowly leaned forward in his seat, and smacked his lips. Staring at the judge, he began his own opening statement.
"The people of Gotham have grown ridiculously stupid over the past few years." Kitty Liz watched the prosecution attorney grip the sides of his chair in fury, glowering at the Joker a bit overdramatically. He was clearly wavering on the edge of calling an objection. The Joker continued, unbothered. "They had so many chances of preventing all of these terrible crimes from happening, and yet they failed to act every time. Maybe because of pride, maybe because of laziness, but most probably because of plain stupidity. So am I guilty of these accusations?" He glanced down at his own heap of papers. "Homicide? Armed robbery? Manslaughter? Am I guilty? No. The people of Gotham are. They are to blame." The Joker suddenly flung himself around in his chair, to face the audience. "Yes, Gotham is guilty, because failure to act is just as bad as participation."
Kitty Liz felt a sudden chill go through her body, because she knew that in some sick, twisted way, the Joker was right.
The prosecution's desk seemed to explode. The attorney jumped out of his seat with a loud
"Objection!"
The judge was quick to respond.
"You have no grounds for objections. Overruled. One more outburst like that, prosecutor, and I'll hold you in contempt," she snapped, banging with her gavel. The attorney sat back down, his drama becoming slightly distracting.
The Joker, completely ignorant of the prosecution, began to fumble with something on the front of his jumpsuit. And a second later, a panicky, shrill voice cried out
"What is that in the defendant's hand?!"
John Creed was pointing at the Joker again, his face distorted with a dramatic mix of horror and fury. The guard to Joker's left grabbed the object of Creed's attention out of the Joker's hand, and Kitty Liz almost fell out of her chair. What the guard was holding was her calling card, the very one she gave the Joker earlier today. Why would he take it out this early, in plain sight? What will happen to her when they discover the razor taped to the back? She was beginning to feel dangerously faint.
The judge motioned the guard to hand her the card. Kitty Liz closed her eyes, trying to control her breathing, and to come up with adequate excuses for why the Joker has her calling card, and why there is a razor blade taped to the back. Needless to say, she failed miserably. Meanwhile, the judge examined the card closely, turning it over several times, and then said, addressing Creed,
"It's nothing, just a business card."
Kitty Liz jumped at those words, eyes opening wide. And then she sank into her chair with relief. The razor blade wasn't there. The judge handed the card back to Joker's guard, who handed it back to the Joker. John was looking disappointed.
The Joker took the card casually, stealing a glance back at its original owner, momentarily locking eyes with her. He could tell by her face that she's just lived through the most frightening moment of her life. Smiling to himself, he turned around to face the front again, absent-mindedly fingering the razor blade now taped to the inside of his sleeve.
The Judge called the court back to order, and asked if the Joker was finished with his statement.
"Yeah… Your Honour," came his reply, the last two words coming out through gritted teeth. The judge paused, glaring at him, but decided that his unfelt response would have to do. She turned to Creed, her mouth twitching, and told him that he may invite his first witness.
There were plenty of witnesses, all of them recounting terrible stories of the Joker's inhumane acts. The prosecution attorney was overflowing with enthusiasm as he questioned each witness, but his enthusiasm grew more and more distracting. The Joker sat slouching in his chair, silent. He was enjoying the witnesses' stories.
Finally, it was time for the jury to be released to make their verdict. As the jury left the room, the audience burst into excited conversation. Kitty Liz however, sat with her elbows on her knees, her face in her hands, which were cold, even though the over-flowing courtroom has become rather warm. She tried to block out the noise, as every single sound around her contributed to her growing headache. She felt anxious, even though she knew the case was lost from the very start. Unlike her, the Joker seemed to be in a perfectly correct state of mind. He sat in his chair, leaning back in it as much as he could, his head lolling backwards. His eyes were closed, and there was still a smile twisting his broken lips.
It must've been an hour before the jury returned, and the courtroom immediately fell silent and attentive. Kitty Liz, however, felt too sick to look up, and continued staring at the floor, face in her hands. The Joker, too, continued lounging in his chair.
The verdict was handed to the bailiff, who handed it over to the judge, who read it over silently, her eyes glinting, and then handed it back to the jury. The foreman then read it aloud. Finally came the words that Kitty has been dreading for the entire day.
"We, the jury, find the defendant.." The entire courtroom held its breath at that minuscule pause. The Joker even bothered to open his eyes. ".. guilty of all charges."
A silent cheer seemed to emanate from the courtroom, while Kitty Liz sank even lower in her seat. The Joker closed his eyes again, and his smile widened. It was clear now that he never expected to win the case.
The judge was now examining a calendar on her desk. Then she addressed the Joker.
"Sentencing will be at 9:00 A.M. on April 1st. You will not be returning to Arkham, but will be taken into custody. Court dismissed." She smacked her gavel conclusively.
"Alright, time to go," one of the two guards behind the Joker's chair observed. But at that moment the Joker held up his hand for attention.
"May I say something, before you take me away to my doom?" he asked with mock politeness. The judge gave him a curt nod. The Joker turned around in his chair and cleared his throat.
"All of you people," he said, absent-mindedly sweeping across the room with his hand, "are so trusting of those who are in charge, that you've become blind to all the little mistakes that they make. Now, those mistakes may be little, but they sure do prove to be fatal!" His voice took on a different tone at that last word, as if it excited him. He glanced at the guard to his right, the one who told him that it was time to go, with a smirk. "To tell you the truth, you've become so blind, that you don't even see the things that are staring you right in the face." At that moment, he looked straight at Kitty Liz, and his expression was serious, threatening. Kitty Liz felt rather hot, and sank low into her seat guiltily. "Never trust the ones who seem harmless!" The Joker threw his hand-cuffed hands into the air as he spoke. Suddenly, he straightened up, looking around the room as if planning a move. He slipped his hand inside his cuff, and carefully unstuck the razor blade. He took a calculating breath. "I admit, you've finally caught me.. But that doesn't mean you'll have me for long.. Hey, ugly!" He turned to the guard to his right, and the latter leaned towards him. At that moment, Joker struck with his hand-cuffed hands, sending a blur of silver across the guard's face. The guard recoiled with a shriek of pain, grasping his face, and tumbled to the floor, blood making a puddle around him. The second guard acted immediately, but the Joker was ready. As the guard jerked towards him, the Joker struck out with both hands again, slashing the guard's throat. He pushed him out of the way, and jumped from his seat. By that time, the room was in a state of panic.
Guards came spilling out of every direction, it seemed, but the Joker was fast to act. He stared right at Kitty Liz and, having made-up his mind, went straight for her.
"Happy?" he hissed, as he glared at her. Kitty Liz cringed in her chair. He pulled her up by the arm, and threw the handcuffs over her neck, pulling her right up close to his body, and pressing the blade to her throat. Guns were pointing at them from every-which-way.
"Now, now, don't do anything stupid, you cowards," Joker crooned at the guards, "You wouldn't want to lose your precious lawyer." He strengthened his grip on her. "Come on," he commanded.
They walked backwards to the door, the guns following every step they took. Nobody dared to move, and the fear on Kitty Liz's face was not an act. Finally, the door loomed right behind them, and the Joker pushed it open carefully with his foot. They slipped through, wheeling around as they did so, and came face to face with Samantha. She held her gun with shaking hands, pointing it above and behind Kitty Liz, where the Joker's face was just visible.
"I'm not gonna let you go," Samantha said, her voice trembling, but confident. The Joker sighed in annoyance.
"Let her go," Samantha ordered him.
"Ms. Lawyer," he addressed Kitty, "will you please help me out here?"
Kitty Liz swallowed, and took a deep breath. She locked eyes with Samantha and begged
"Please, put the gun down. It will be better that way. I promise you, I'll be alright."
Samantha was begging herself, with her eyes. A painful moment passed.
"Miss Francis.." she began, and Kitty Liz was sure she felt the Joker jolt as she spoke the name, "I'm sorry." With a guilty expression on her face, Samantha put her gun down to the floor. The Joker wheeled Kitty Liz around, and shoved her along down the corridor. As they rounded the corner, she felt the Joker's grip on her loosen, and the razor blade leave her throat. She twisted out of the Joker's grasp. That hint of insanity was just beginning to kick in. She gave the Joker a long, intense look as she re-examined what she was about to do. Making her choice for the final time, she grabbed the Joker by the wrist, and started pulling him along the corridor, saying
"This way."
They rounded a corner, and then another one. Voices could now be heard behind them, and they knew that they were being pursued. Suddenly, Kitty Liz turned sharply, pulling the Joker into a stairwell.
"Why are we going up here?" he asked incredulously.
"Because we can escape from up there," she replied quickly. They sped through several landings, until finally the stairs came to an end. They burst into the corridor, and followed it to the last doorway it contained. Kitty Liz pushed the Joker in, and closed the door behind them quickly. She took a key out of her pocket, and locked it. Just as she removed the key, the door began to shake violently. The guards were on the other side.
"You've had this all planned out, haven't you?" the Joker asked, as they stood there, trying to catch their breath.
"Yeah," she said simply. Then, she reached into her hair, which was tied back in a semi-ponytail, and held together with an assortment of bobby pins. She removed one of the bobby pins as the Joker watched her curiously. She motioned him over. "Give me your hands." The Joker held his hands up obediently, looking even more curious. Kitty Liz got a hold of his handcuffs, and began to pick at the lock with the pin. Soon enough, the Joker was shaking the cuffs off his wrists with enthusiasm.
"You know, hairpins like that are not something you acquire at a local mall," he observed.
"I know a few places," Kitty Liz replied, smiling to herself.
The expression on the Joker's face was changing. Becoming serious again.
"Why are you doing this?" asked the Joker, and his voice was harsh.
Kitty Liz wavered.
"Why the hell are you doing this??" asked the Joker again, and his voice was becoming dangerously low.
"I'm not going to tell you, here, now, why I am doing this, just as you wouldn't tell me right now how you really got those scars."
They stared at each other, each sizing the other one up. Kitty Liz was tall, and she was no weakling. But she was facing a six-foot-tall asylum inmate, with a razor blade. She was just about to look away from the Joker's penetrating glare, when a rather vicious assault on the door made them both jump.
Brought back to reality, the Joker began looking for the way out. And then he realized that there was none. He looked at Kitty Liz in shock.
"How the hell do we get out of here??" he asked, advancing on her until he backed her into a wall, the blood-covered razor flashing dangerously between his fingers.
Kitty Liz tried to find her voice, but couldn't. Instead, she looked past the Joker's face, to the opposite side of the room. The Joker caught on soon enough, and turned around to look at a single window in the back wall. He turned back to face Kitty Liz, his expression a mix of surprise and anger.
"What??" he hissed. Then he let go of her, and marched over to the window. Kitty Liz followed once she could breathe again. The Joker slid the window up forcefully, and leaned out of it, looking at what lay beyond. What met him was a four-storey drop, and he turned back around to glare at Kitty Liz.
"Now what?" he growled.
Not sure whether or not she could talk yet, Kitty pointed at the ceiling. The Joker followed the direction she was pointing in with his eyes before flinging himself out of the window again, and looking up. The roof of The Courthouse was only two metres away.
"And how do we get up there??"
"We climb," Kitty Liz croaked, her voice still unstable. The Joker stared at her, incredulous. Feeling that the Joker won't be convinced without a demonstration, Kitty Liz walked past him, and climbed onto the frame of the window. She slipped through it, and stood on the other side now, gripping the outer edges of the frame with both hands. There was a ledge that ran along the wall outside, and she began to edge along that. Her coordination wasn't impressive, but she had pretty good balance. Heights didn't bother her either. She heard the Joker hoist himself out of the window with a grunt. He began to follow her reluctantly along the edge. They made it to the corner of the building. Here, more ledges and ornamental protrusions formed a sort of ladder to the top. Here, Kitty Liz began to climb. The Joker watched after her.
"It amazes, if not frightens, me what women can do in high heels."
Kitty Liz smiled at his remark. So she amazed the Joker. That was a start. She flopped over onto the rooftop, and felt something shoving at her thighs. She mustered her final strength, and flung her legs onto the roof, as well. The Joker's head came into view a moment later and he, too, scrabbled onto the cold concrete. They lay there for a few moments, panting in the fresh, chilly air. After a few refreshing gulps of the cold air, they got up unsteadily, still dizzy from the climb.
"I hope your ingenious plan involves some type of transportation," the Joker said sceptically. Kitty Liz looked around, trying to get her bearings.
"There is a parking garage attached to this building. Right there. We'll get there by going across the roofs."
"Now we're talking," the Joker replied, a familiar insane grin flashing across his features.
The parking garage was not hard to access. A set of stairs led from the roof to the very bottom. There, amongst the rows of parked cars, Kitty Liz led the way to a spot right in the corner.
"Well, where's your ride?" the Joker asked, not sure what he should be looking at. Kitty Liz stared at something in the corner, and pretty soon the Joker saw it too. A little black Vespa scooter. The Joker looked at Kitty Liz, un-amused.
"What?" she asked, even though she already knew.
"You've got.. to be kidding me."
"You've got any better alternatives??"
"We're in a PARKING GARAGE!!"
"You're gonna steal a car?? That one?" Kitty Liz pointed at a inconspicuous-looking silver one across from her scooter.
"No, WE'RE gonna steal a car, and we're gonna steal THAT one," He pointed to a commercial van that was parked further down the line, "You can put your scooter in the back."
Kitty Liz proceeded to break into the van with the use of one of her bobby pins again, while the Joker hauled her scooter over. Once the scooter was inside, Kitty Liz got into the driver's seat, but suddenly paused.
"What?" asked the Joker, leaning on the open driver's door.
"I don't think these work on car ignitions..." She stuck her bobby pin into the ignition, and moved it from side to side. But the car didn't start. She looked up at the Joker, worried.
"Clearly you've never hotwired a car before. Scooch," he commanded, motioning her to move into the passenger seat. She obeyed quickly. The Joker got into the driver's seat, and shut the door behind him. He began to work at the access cover underneath the steering wheel with his razor blade. Once the cover was off, he began to work at the wires underneath. Suddenly, the ignition was on, and the engine kicked off with a roar. The Joker grinned at Kitty Liz enthusiastically.
"Off we go, then," he said, and to Kitty's surprise, put on his seatbelt.
"What? You don't think maniacs like me care about personal safety?"
Kitty Liz grinned.
"Well, you certainly don't care about the safety of others."
"Well, there are a few exceptions," the Joker replied with a shrug. Police sirens suddenly blared outside. "Great, we've got company." The Joker turned to Kitty Liz. "I need you to get down in front of the seat." He began to back out of the parking spot.
"What?!"
"You're my hostage, remember?"
"I thought I may have been promoted to 'accomplice' by now!"
"Listen, if you don't want to get shot at, then do it!" He sped out of the parking garage. Kitty Liz climbed down onto the floor in front of her seat, finding herself completely cramped. Meanwhile, the Joker made a sharp turn onto the street beyond.
They didn't even make it past the first intersection before the Joker threw a casual glance behind him, and cursed. Police sirens suddenly erupted from all around them. The Joker wavered, and then stepped on the gas. The van accelerated with another deafening roar, and the Joker turned the steering wheel madly. Kitty Liz felt the van swing around a corner, but the sirens were still as loud and clear as before. The Joker increased speed yet again. He turned to Kitty Liz momentarily.
"Hang on!"
She did, and at that moment, the van did something she wasn't sure until then was possible. The tires squealed as the Joker turned the steering wheel completely to the left. She felt the two wheels on her side lift off the pavement and was sure that the van would tip over. However, it did not. As the Joker worked hard to straighten out the steering wheel, the right side of the van reconnected with the pavement.
"What'd you do?!" Kitty Liz cried out.
"I turned around." Then, "Bad idea, they're surrounding us... Damnit!" He suddenly ducked behind the steering wheel, and not a moment later, the windshield broke in several places. Another bullet took out the Joker's side window, and Kitty Liz screamed. The Joker looked at her apologetically, and then looked back out at the road again. He made a very sharp right turn. The sirens seemed farther away now, and he grinned triumphantly.
"May I please sit on the seat now?" Kitty Liz begged, afraid that she was going to throw up.
"Yes," came the reply.
She climbed out of the compressed space, and sat shakily on the seat, putting her seatbelt on hastily.
"Please don't ever do that again."
"I'll try, but I can't guarantee anything."
"Do you even know where you're going??"
"What?! Of course I do! Somewhat."
Kitty Liz looked at him doubtfully. Then she realized that she couldn't hear any sirens anymore.
"Hey!" she exclaimed, "I think we've lost them!"
"Think again," the Joker growled in response. From around the corner ahead of them, five police cars came swerving onto the street, sirens blaring. The Joker turned left, and after a few minutes Kitty Liz realized where they were. They were on the outskirts of the city by now, and on their right was Gotham River. The Joker was increasing speed again.
"There is a place," he said, "where we can hide. This road does a sharp bend ahead, which will momentarily hide us from view." He glanced in the rear-view mirror, where the procession of flashing blue and red lights could be seen. "On one side of that hidden portion of the street is a dock. The road beyond the bend ends in a 'T', and zigzags in both directions. If we are quick enough to drive into the dock unnoticed, the cops will continue along the road ahead. Hopefully, they'll think we're just out of sight." Kitty Liz stared at him, befuddled.
"Never mind," he told her, "Just hold on."
They sped past a bright 'sharp curve ahead sign', and then Kitty Liz understood what the Joker was talking about. The road turned to the left, bending around a large storage facility that also hid it from view. The Joker stepped on the gas, and burst into the turn. Kitty Liz saw the dock, slightly below the street they were on, a drive leading down to it on their right. Kitty looked into the side-mirror, and saw that the cop cars were blocked from view by the storage facility. The Joker careened onto the drive leading to the dock, but not sharply enough. They slammed into a pile of cement-filled barrels on their left, spun madly for a couple of moments, and finally came to a stop right underneath the street they were just on. The Joker looked up, squirming and groaning, a gash on his forehead spilling blood over his face. Sirens blared above them, but the police cars passed without stopping or slowing. The engine rattled dead, and there was silence.
They climbed out of the car, on hands and knees, the Joker looking like he was about to pass out. Kitty Liz willed herself to get up, and threw off her suit jacket. Using her teeth, she began to work at the sleeve of her dress shirt, until she finally tore the entire thing off. She approached the Joker, who was spluttering on the pavement, and tied the rag around his head. He wheezed as she helped him up.
"Now that," he said, panting, and spitting out the blood that got into his mouth, "was a close one." Kitty Liz nodded, as the Joker wiped his face with his sleeves.
Exhausted, they sat down next to their steaming van, and said nothing for about ten minutes. Finally, the Joker got up, and went to get Kitty Liz's scooter from the back of the van.
"It's kinda dented and slightly scratched, but I'm sure it will get you to the nearest police station. Then you could tell them all about how you were kidnapped by the sociopath monster, and how you daringly escaped."
Kitty Liz gaped at him.
"No?" the Joker asked, uncertain.
"Don't you understand???" she burst out at him, "I didn't do this planning to go back to my normal life afterwards, as if nothing happened! I want people to know that it was ME who helped Gotham's greatest criminal escape from jail! I don't want to go back to my normal life, I want to help YOU." She was breathing heavily, looking hurt.
"Please don't go into shock, I beg of you," the Joker said, making a face. He wavered for a few seconds. Then he spoke, slowly, calculating every word. "I have no need of you, I will not lie, for the time being. I don't know what will happen for the next few days, so I am telling you now that it would be better if you just went home."
"No," Kitty Liz told him firmly.
The Joker made a face again.
"Or.. you can entertain the idea that you are still my hostage..."
Kitty Liz's face brightened up.
"But," the Joker continued, "I would like you to leave me for now."
Kitty Liz's face fell just as quickly as it had brightened up. She opened her mouth to protest, but the Joker interrupted her.
"Just for the time being! When I'll need you, I'll call you! I mean, I DO have you card." He flipped it out of his chest pocket, and showed it to her.
Kitty Liz nodded, composed. Feeling dizzy - she was so tired - she got up slowly, and staggered over to her scooter. She climbed onto it, its familiarity immediately making her more comfortable. She gave the Joker a weak smile.
"I will be expecting some chaos from you soon," she said. "And a phone call."
"I can guarantee you both. I thank you for ruining your life today."
Kitty Liz grinned.
"It was my pleasure."
* * *
It was only curiosity that brought her back to her apartment building. She paused across the street from it, looking up to the sixth floor where her apartment was. She could see through the window that the light was on, and that people were walking inside. Cops. It was quite fine, really - just what she expected and prepared for. She continued along the emptying streets. About a half-hour later, she arrived at the seafront. A long, pebbled stretch of beach lay in front of her, and on the beach was scattered a small collection of beach-houses. The one that interested her was at the very end, where the pebbles met a dark, sheer cliff. She made her way down the beach, the only sound present being the rumble of her Vespa's motor. That beach house belonged to one of her friends once, who then moved away without bothering to sell it, and so it stood abandoned. It was a tiny wooden cabin, but Kitty Liz has turned it into her sanctuary. Over the past few weeks, she's equipped it with a generator, refrigerator, lamps, and anything else she may need for survival. The wood stove acted as a convenient source of heat, and her cell phone was her link to the outer world. All in all, she was pleased with the results.
That evening, Kitty Liz didn't even bother to change out of her clothes. Instead, she placed her cell phone onto the table beside her bed, and collapsed in exhaustion. Before she fell asleep, which only took her a couple of moments, she realized that she felt better than she had in a long time. She looked at her cell phone with a smile. He will call.