A/N: Another fic that takes place before the actual manga. It's something that randomly came to my brain while rereading the Ship Voyage Arc. Enjoy!
Rating: T
Disclaimer: Nope, not mine.
Encounters
He is five years old when the shadows start moving in the dark.
Peering up from under the protecting blankets, the boy sees them morph into a human silhouette, probably male, tall, leaving the black corner in which it has formed itself…
When it comes to a halt by the window, letting the moonlight surround it, he can see tendrils of thick black smoke swirling around the figure as if they have a life of their own.
Horror rises in his stomach and reaches up, passing his throat which it tightens around. He is breathing too fast, his head feels terrifyingly empty, leaving him useless and with no knowledge of what to do. A small heart is thumping so loud that the shadow must hear it.
A head without any further definition turns to him.
One step into his direction: The soft thud on a carpet, a faint intake of breath among frightened panting.
Something bends down in front of the child, faintly illuminated by the light of a small lamp, smiling with a wide mouth full of teeth -
Ciel screams and screams and screams, barely taking notice of the old butler who enters his room in a hurry, trying to calm him down without success.
He screams and thrashes around, all those sharp teeth in mind that rip his skin into tiny red shreds.
His voice cracks.
Silence rings in his ears.
OOO
At the age of six, he finally goes to sleep alone again. He doesn't object when the doors to his room close while he's still awake. Instead, he takes a book and practises reading next to a small lamp. There is nothing to be afraid of, he tells himself regularly, (wise words from his father) nothing at all. The shadow hasn't returned. Therefore, he can assume that it had simply been a trick of his own imagination back then. His parents took it lightly, but he still finds it embarrassing. This isn't how a noble ought to behave. He doesn't need someone waiting for him to fall asleep -
The light goes out, slowly, as if it was suffocating.
His heart misses a beat.
Careful not to make any noise, he sets his book down, trying to find something in the darkness that isn't where he suspects it.
It's behind him.
He feels something cold close around his hand, sending uncomfortable shivers down his spine. Instinct tells him to get away from the thing that is holding him, to run, but…
He feels drawn to the shadow.
When it lets his hand go, he gets up, taking a deep breath before walking right through the black smoke. He looks at his gift from the shadow. A black feather is lying proudly in his innocent hand, painted white in the moonlight.
"Is that an apology?" he asks, voice thin, but when he turns around, there is no one to hear him anymore.
Then he notices he's shaking.
OOO
"I'm not afraid of you", he says when he turns eight, sounding childish in his own ears. "I'm growing up, I'll be an adult sometime, and you aren't even real. Therefore, you can't scare me. Nothing can scare me. I won't be afraid of anything anymore."
The shadow stands by the window, mute as always and regards him in an indulgent way.
Ciel thinks he's said the right thing as he turns his back to the nightly intruder – he should know where the door is – and vehemently ignores the voice in the back of his head.
It won't cease its talking, though, telling him that this shadow might know more than he does.
Of course it doesn't. It can't.
One leather-clad hand sneaks under the covers and up to his head as his eyes close, fingers tracing round cheeks and soft lips. A single nail scratches lightly over porcelain skin, pausing over the boy's jugular as if considering.
The hand retreats.
The child's breath doesn't return as easily as anticipated.
OOO
That spring following his ninth birthday begins with caresses during the day. Light doesn't provide safety anymore. He feels cool fingers at the nape of his neck, on his back, hands around his arms. Whenever the absent shadow touches him, he forgets what he wanted to say, what he's been thinking about a second ago. His father starts frowning more often and his mother repeatedly wants to know whether he's alright.
He says he is, smiles politely and represses a shiver as a hand trails down his spine during breakfast.
OOO
He's playing with his dog Sebastian in the garden, still laughing and wondering when it will stop.
The dog waves its tail happily, chasing after the stick he accidentally throws into the flowers before he can stop it. Ciel turns around to see whether his parents have witnessed his mistake. They are having tea outside under a tree, speaking to each other in low tones. His father says something that makes his mother laugh.
The boy finds the sound comforting.
A cool breeze passes by, contrasting the summer heat, and licks over the boy's skin before travelling to his parents.
For the first time he sees the shadow materialize in the middle of the day.
It starts with faintly defined claws that come to rest on his father's shoulders. Ink spreads across the scenery to take the fleeting shape of a man.
His mother's smile falters for a moment's length.
The shadow leans in, cocking its head to the side as if considering something. Silhouetted lips part.
Ciel thinks he can see teeth.
"Father!" he shouts without having a plan of what to say. Instead, he helplessly gestures to his dog digging up the flowers.
He can't say that he's relieved when the shadow finally disappears.
OOO
The shadow doesn't visit him in autumn.
Of all the things it could have done to him, this frightens him the most.
OOO
He thinks he should have seen the fire coming.
Perhaps also the cage he's put in, the humiliation he has to endure. The mute sound of him breaking. His body is a stepped on canvas in blue, purple, green and red lying behind iron bars. When he moves the wrong way, he can feel the skin opening above the untreated burn on his back.
He's frightened and in pain and feels so filthy.
At the beginning he can't help himself but cry, mourn and hope for a way to escape.
His tears dry up as soon as he understands that the spectators love seeing them, his mourning stops and his hope – such a survivor – is killed the moment they put him on the altar.
And then…
A shadow appears.
No, not a shadow. It's darkness itself, crawling up the walls, hiding a body behind thick tendrils of solid black.
In that darkness, eyes search for something, completely ignoring the members of the cult who seek the creature's attention. When red lands on blue, the boy wants to shrink back, but he doesn't. Something primal inside him comes to life, wanting him to get out of here, to use this chance, and a different thing, raw and painful, claws its way into him, where it finds a nest in a heart that withers.
Something finally dies inside him while something else violently rises.
"You have summoned me", the creature tells him. The deep voice is as soothing as a lion stalking its prey.
Ciel wants to say that he knows him.
He thinks he knows him.
He's not sure.
The creature – Sebastian, as he will later call him – takes his hand and leads him over the bodies scattered at his feet. The touch – even if the hand is wrapped in satin – feels familiar. Ciel wants to ask. He really does.
Instead he regards the shape of the demon's lips, adding sharp white teeth in his imagination.
He goes to sleep alone that night.