I'm back with another sboc story, I just can't seem to stay away from them! This first chapter is a little long, but I hope you like it! The song below is more or less what my story is based on.


It's a shame that it had to be this way

It's a shame that it had to be this way
It's not enough to say I'm sorry
It's not enough to say I'm sorry

Maybe I'm to blame
Or maybe we're the same
But either way I can't breathe
Either way I can't breathe

All I had to say is goodbye
We're better off this way
We're better off this way

I'm alive but I'm losing all my drive
Cause everything were been through

And everything about you
Seemed to be a lie
A guiltless twisted lie
It made me learn to hate you
Or hate myself for letting it pass by

-Goodbye, Secondhand Serenade

Prologue

How it even got to this point is beyond me.

We were perfect for each other.

At least that's what I thought. He obviously didn't.

I suppose the signs were there all along, I just didn't see them. Or maybe I didn't want to see them.

Regardless, it happened. He ended it and I've never felt pain like this.

I can't breathe freely; I can't laugh, or even smile. I feel lost. We were together for so long, what do I do now?

How do I go on without him?

I know how pathetic I sound, but I've never had my heart broken before. Actually, he pretty much tore it out, crushed it, stomped on in, and left it to die.

Maybe I'm being a bit dramatic. I do tend to lean to that side. But it really does hurt.

At any rate, at least the Gryffindor crowd took me in. I wouldn't be able to make it around the traitors in my house.

Okay, so maybe they aren't all bad, but that's where he is. Him and the girl he left me for.

An explanation is at hand. I'll start from about three days before it happened. Just remember, I wasn't kidding when I said I tend to be dramatic.

November (before the break-up)

What is wrong with me? I mean, jealous of that French girl?

I do have reason to be, she's always around MY man.

He's not exactly innocent in all of this though is he? Nope, of course he isn't. If he loves me as much as he says he loves me then he'd stay away from her knowing that she wants him.

Unless he wants her too.

That is definitely not something I want to think about.

Let me start at the beginning. I started Hogwarts my fifth year. No, I'm not a foreign exchange student or anything; it's just that my parents are protective, more like paranoid if you ask me.

They're muggles so they were beyond surprised when someone from Hogwarts came and explained the whole me being a witch thing to them. They weren't keen on letting me go to Hogwarts so they asked if there was any other choice.

There was.

Since money wasn't a problem, they hired a witch to home school me until I was fourteen going on fifteen. They would have had me home schooled until I was seventeen if I hadn't kept pestering them about going to a real school.

It's Mikayla Sander's fault really. Kay (that's my nickname for her) is my best friend who I've known since we were like four. She's a half blood and was good at hiding that she was as witch until she found out I was one too. She goes to Hogwarts; she was there since first year because her parents aren't paranoid like mine. Our friendship is such that even though we don't see each other much (even now that we're both at Hogwarts) every time we talk it's like no time has passed, like I saw her just the other day; we catch up and have fun.

Anyhow, every summer she would come back and tell me how great Hogwarts was and that I just had to go there and this and that and that and that. Naturally, when she got home after her first year at Hogwarts and told me how great it was, my first reaction was to annoy my parents into letting me go. They refused for three long years, but the summer before what would be my fifth year they consented (about time too).

We had a meeting with the headmaster, Dumbledore, that summer so he could see what level I was at and whatnot. Turns out that I was right on track to start with the other fifth years and the Sorting Hat put me in Ravenclaw. Overall not bad, even though Kay was in Hufflepuff. I went back home after and packed. I was going to Hogwarts in September!

I hadn't realized how scary that would be until I got there. I knew Kay but we weren't in the same house so we didn't see much of each other. Long story short, I started, it was exciting, and I loved it. I made friends after a month (I'm shy). Among those friends was Bradley Carr, my current boyfriend. We were friends before we started going out in the beginning of sixth year. At the beginning of this year, that French girl transferred from Beaubaxtons and is currently ruining everything.

She comes in with her perfect, dark, curly locks, light, smooth skin, shining blue eyes, and stupid French accent that has half of the male population falling at her feet. To my dismay, she's sorted into Ravenclaw. Even worse, she's placed in the dormitory I'm in. It used to be just four of us, three girls who don't particularly care for me, and me. Now with her in it, it's overcrowded. That really isn't the worst part; the worst part is that she's after Brad, though he refuses to believe me.

Does she have a name? Oh yes, it's Nathalie, and if anyone dares pronounce it any way other than the French nah-tah-ly then you're in for it. She's the Devil's spawn, no joke.

"Jade! Hold on!" Sean calls out to me as I make my way to Defence Against the Dark Arts.

Sean Porter is Brad's best mate, and one of mine too though I haven't known him as long. Anyway, I mostly hang out with Brad and Sean, if one is busy I go with the other, if both are busy I either have some alone time or go with some girl friends in Gryffindor or with Kay if I can find them. I'll admit that happens quite often since Brad has his Prefect duties and who knows what else, and Sean either has Quidditch practice or goes with Sirius Black from Gryffindor. He always invites me so I won't be alone but I usually decline.

"What's up?" I ask when he reaches me.

"Guess who I'm going with to Hogsmeade tomorrow?" he asks me, a huge grin on his face.

"I really don't know, who?"

"Tiffany!"

I bite my lip. I hate to burst his happy moment, but I have to. "Tiffany Scott? Are you sure about this Sean?"

He looks a tad downcast now. "Of course I am. I know that I shouldn't after the whole Tyler thing, but she's changed. I trust her, Jade. I still love her."

I suppress a sigh. "If you're sure," I say uncertainly.

"I am," he says more confidently than he probably feels, or so I think.

"Have you seen Brad?" I ask him. We're sitting in class now and even though it hasn't started, Brad is usually here by now.

"Nope, maybe he had to stay behind in muggle studies?"

"Maybe," I say slightly distracted.

Class has begun and Brad still isn't here. I accept that he isn't coming, which really is unfortunate because I usually sit next to him. Sean left to sit with Tiffany five minutes ago and Sirius Black took the seat next to me.

Sirius Black. I'm not oblivious to his good looks, or of his 'marauder' status, or of how a couple of girls will throw themselves at him. I just stay away from guys like that because they're typically not the relationship type. However, I get along with him fine and we talk here and there, mostly because he and Sean are good mates; apparently, they have been since first year when the Ravenclaws had flying lessons with Gryffindors. Brad likes to tease Sean about it being love at first sight or that Quidditch united their souls.

Sirius also happens to be in Charms Club with me. I know, I know, the marauders in Charms Club? According to Sean, James joined because Lily was in it and James dragged Sirius along. Why am I in it? Well Sirius dragged Sean along who dragged me along and I dragged Kay along. Brad goes whenever he's free. Anyway, Sirius and I don't talk too much. Oh, we say hi to each other and we have the occasional small exchange of words but that's it. We've never had a long conversation.

"Hi Jade, what's up?" he asks me casually. He's leaning on the two back legs of his chair, hands behind his head as if he's the hottest thing since sliced bread.

"Nothing really. I thought I was going to be a loner since Brad didn't show up and Sean ditched me for Tiffany," I say a bit sourly. I do resent Sean for that a little.

I notice Sirius' gaze shift to the aforementioned couple. He chuckles without humour. "You know, it's funny cuz whenever Sean is back with Tiffany I never hear from him. Guess it'll be like this for a couple of weeks."

I look at him, puzzled. "What do you mean a couple of weeks?"

"Black and Anderson," Professor Sorenson's voice comes from the front of the classroom. "Do you have something to share with the class?"

"No, sir," we answer.

"Then kindly cease your chatter or I will assign you both a detention."

He continues his lecture on the theory behind the next spell we'll be working on. A couple of minutes later Sirius answers my question.

"Haven't you noticed the pattern? They went out for four years then broke it off, and ever since then it's on and off with them. I won't hear from him for however long he's with her, and when they end it he'll be my best mate again."

This is interesting; I never really paid much attention to the pattern, but it is there. "Is it awful to think she's wrong for him?" I ask Sirius.

"Why? Do you think you'll be better for him?" he smirks teasingly.

I roll my eyes. "Don't be daft, Sirius, I only mean that . . . well . . . I don't really trust her."

He looks serious now. "I know what you mean, I don't either. You should see the way she acts with Tyler; sometimes he even brings her to the common room to hang out. Sure, they don't go into the dormitories but still, if she says she's so into Sean, why is she hanging out with Tyler at all? She should just leave him alone since they have a strong history together."

Is Sirius being deep? His words were oddly . . . mature. I'm used to the playful, reckless, immature side of him. He's right though. Tyler and Tiffany dated, if she's with Sean now she really shouldn't be hanging around her ex alone. "It frustrates me that I know she isn't good for him but can do nothing about it! And Tyler isn't exactly innocent either, aren't Gryffindors supposed to be honourable?"

"We're supposed to be brave. Aren't Ravenclaws supposed to be intelligent?"

That was a slap at Sean. "Touché."

"Besides, this is more her doing than anything. Sure Tyler has some blame but in all fairness, he's tried to break off ties with her and she's the one who chases him."

"So-"

"Black and Anderson! Detention! Another word out of either of you and I'll double it, I am not a patient man."

"Don't we know it," Sirius whispers to me, except it comes out too loud.

I am mortified. I can't believe his just said that.

"Out! Both of you! See me after class regarding your detention."

I stare, dumbfounded, until I feel Sirius tugging on my sleeve. "I suggest we go before he gets more upset," he whispers, a huge grin on his face.

I glare at him, pick up my things, and walk out.

"Whoa! Hold on, are you mad?" he asks once we're out in the hall.

I turn on him. "I've never had a detention, let alone been kicked out of class!"

"That's actually a first for me too. I didn't think professors did that. Detention isn't so bad though! It can be loads of fun if you're with the right people."

I'm not exactly mad about getting a detention because I know that is my fault as much as his. What isn't my fault is being kicked out of class. "Ugh, we have almost two hours left! You just had to get us kicked out of a double period of Defence didn't you?" I ask, annoyance written all over my face.

He grins, is that all he does? "I didn't think he would hear me!"

As mad as I am, I can't help but return his grin, which makes my next statement lose some of its value. "Whatever, I guess I'll see you later to get our detentions," I say, turning to walk away.

"Wait, where are you going?" he asks.

I turn around and answer. "To my common room, obviously."

"It's yours now, is it?" he smirks.

That boy just loves to tease and I'm not in the mood for it. "Bye Sirius."

"Wait! I was kidding; you don't want to go to your common room. You'll be there by yourself, it'll be boring."

"It's not like there's anything else to do."

"Actually, there is."

"And what would that be?"

"We can go somewhere to practice that spell we're supposed to be doing, but before we need to make a stop by the kitchens because I need a snack."

"You can't go to the kitchens! Not only are we not allowed, but we don't know where it is."

He feigns hurt. "I'm insulted, Jade. Do you not know who you're standing next to?"

"Er, Sirius?" I answer slowly, somehow sure that that isn't the answer he's looking for.

"Well, yeah, but I'm also one of the marauders! Don't you know why they call us that?"

"Er, because you maraud things?" Again, not the answer he's looking for.

"Sort of, but the point is, I of course know where the kitchens are. I know this school like the back of my hand."

"Right," I hardly believe him. This is a big school.

"So are you in?" Sirius asks.

"I don't know . . ."

"Oh come on Jade, live a little!"

We've been standing outside of the classroom for about five minutes. We still have a long time to go, and this sounds like it could be entertaining.

I don't answer right away and realization dawns on Sirius' face. "Oh, well if you think Brad won't be okay with it, it's fine. Don't worry about it, you don't have to come."

"Of course I don't have to, but I want to. It sounds like fun," I answer with a big smile.

"Are you sure? I don't want to make trouble for you," he says.

What is this? Immature Sirius is showing consideration? This has to be a first.

That's not necessarily true. I've never had a real conversation with him before so how in the world would I know if this is a first or not?

Hmm, good point. "Brad won't mind," I assure him.

"All right," he says slowly. "First stop, the kitchens."

We're walking towards the kitchens and I'm nervous about being caught the entire time. Sirius chuckles at my apprehension and mutters something about someone having to corrupt me. I only glare at him playfully. Inside the kitchens, some house elves rush to us and ask what we would like. They're so eager to please, so we just ask for the treats we want. After loading up we leave and make it up to the second floor without being caught.

Sirius keeps walking up more flights of stairs and I wonder where we're going. I ask him.

"I guess I forgot to tell you. I was thinking of going up to the Gryffindor common room since we're sure not to be caught there, unless you want to go the Ravenclaw common room?"

"No, yours is fine," I answer. He leads me to a portrait of a fat woman and mutters a password I don't hear.

The whole time I've been thinking about what Brad will say when I tell him. He won't be mad, I'm sure of it, but I don't think he'll be too happy about it either. I mean, wasn't this just what Sirius and I had been saying earlier about Tiffany?

Yeah, but Sirius and I don't have a past like she does with Tyler, and I'm only here because I was kicked out of class and I need to study.

Exactly! Okay, my conscience is clear! We're in the common room now and it looks pretty much the same as mine except the colours. It's all gold and scarlet rather than blue and silver. The colours are a little harsh on my eyes at first but they quickly adjust.

The common room is completely empty and the awkwardness of the situation finally hits me. Maybe Brad would be upset.

"I'm going to go put my bag away, I'll be right back. Make yourself at home."

"Okay," I say. I make my way over to the couch in front of the fireplace. We're in the middle of November and the weather is steadily getting colder. I point my wand at the fireplace, light it, sit on the floor leaning on the couch so I can be closer to the warmth, and just stare at the fire.

"Are you cold?"

I jump about a foot in the air. Okay, so I'm exaggerating but I didn't hear him coming down the stairs and he scared me. He chuckles.

"I've never liked the cold," I tell him honestly.

"Well, Brad will kill me if you freeze to death so here's a blanket," Sirius grins. He conjures a blanket and hands it to me.

I take it gratefully and wrap it around myself. He sits on the couch and I stay on the floor.

We both have the spell down in about half an hour and now we have another hour left. Wow.

"So," Sirius begins, "this is only your third year at Hogwarts, right?"

"Yeah, my parents are overbearingly protective and they insisted on home schooling me," I answer with a grimace.

He laughs at this. "I take it that you weren't happy about that?"

"Not at all. Mikayla would come home every summer and tell me how great Hogwarts was and I kept bugging my parents to let me come. They didn't until fifth year."

"Yeah, I remember Mikayla mentioning she had a friend who was home schooled when I first met her. But at least you're here now," he says, trying to be positive.

"True, but I haven't been here very long and it's already ending. This is our last year here and I wish I had been here since first year."

"I see your point; I think I would have gone crazy at home. Then again, that would have been before I started hating my family and vice versa so maybe it wouldn't have been so bad."

He says the last part low and I'm not sure if I was supposed to hear it. My mouth is open before I can stop it. "I'm sorry," I say simply.

He looks up, a hint of sorrow in his eyes. "I shouldn't be surprised that you know all about my wonderful family. It's not exactly a secret, is it?"

"Er, no, but if it makes you feel better, you aren't wrong for going against them. And I'm sure they don't hate you, I think they're mostly hurt that you didn't turn out the way they hoped."

"In other words, I'm a disappointment to them," he says bitterly. He's staring at the fire but it doesn't look like he's seeing it.

I stare at the fire too, not knowing what to say. I sit on the couch and lightly touch his arm to get his attention. I make sure he's looking at me before going on.

"Even if they do, you aren't Sirius. I don't know you very well, but I know one thing. You're strong. You don't let other people's beliefs sway you and you're strong enough to stand up for what you believe in, even against your own family. I don't know if I would have been able to do that."

Sirius smiles wryly. "You make me sound a lot better than I really am. Thanks though, I appreciate it. And I'm sorry; I really shouldn't have dumped any of this on you. We hardly know each other and this was just too heavy a topic."

"Don't worry about it," I smile warmly. "I'm sure this is tough for you and, er, if you ever need anyone to talk, I'm available."

He returns my smile. "Thanks, I appreciate that too. Let's lighten the mood though," he says, his usual exuberance returning.

The rest of the hour passes quickly. We talk about everything from school to friends. I laugh as he tells me about pranks he and the other marauders have done. He teases me about Brad and I tease him about random girls we both know. We sometimes get a bit serious though not as serious as before, when we brush on the topic of Sean again. Though he doesn't say it, I see that it bothers him that Sean won't be spending time with him.

"Why does it bother you?" I ask him.

"Ah, you noticed." He shakes his head slowly. "I just feel like I'm losing all my best mates to girls. James is always with Lily, and now Sean will always be with Tiffany. Even Remus, the boy who swore he would never have a girl, is now going out with Anna! And Peter seems to have a different group of friends too."

"Why did Remus swear off relationships?" I ask curiously. That is odd for a

teenage boy to do.

Sirius looks like he's been caught. "Er, it's a rather personal thing for him, I'm sorry."

"Oh, it's no problem, I understand. So why don't you find someone too? It's not like it would be hard for you," I say.

I take a furtive look at his body and face. No, it wouldn't be hard at all.

"Eh, I like being single, but I'll settle down if I find the right girl. I just haven't."

"How cute!" I tease him. "But speaking of finding the right girl, Sean has told me that it took James years to get Lily on his good side."

"Ha-ha yeah, I could write a book about it." I laugh as he tells me stories of James' attempts at winning Lily over before they started going out at the start of the term.

We talk about Quidditch. He's on the Gryffindor team and though I don't play on the Ravenclaw team, I still love it. He's surprised that I like it and I explain to him how my tutor got me to love it. We talk until it's time to meet Professor Sorenson. In the time span of an hour, I got to know Sirius more than I know the girls in my dormitory.

We make our way down the nearly empty halls; we're running a bit late. We reach his classroom to find him impatiently waiting for us near his desk.

"You're late," he says irritably.

"Sorry," I say quietly. Sirius says nothing, probably trying to hold back a smart retort.

"Yes, well, you are to serve your detention starting at ten tomorrow morning. You will-"

"But tomorrow is the trip to Hogsmeade, Professor!" I choke out. I had plans with Brad . . .

"You should have thought about that before you interrupted my class, Miss Anderson. I believe it's only just that I interrupt your plans in return," he says sternly.

"Professor, I'm the one who made the remark, just give me a detention," Sirius says solemnly.

"How noble of you, Mr. Black, but you were not having a conversation with yourself during class, thus Miss Anderson will be joining you tomorrow. I expect you both here promptly at ten. End of discussion."

I walk out and I can hear Sirius follow behind me. He speaks once we're in the corridor. "Sorry, if I hadn't made that last remark in class we would have gotten off with a detention during the week."

I sigh and give him a strained smile as I make my way to lunch. "It's fine, you tried. I'm just a little disappointed, I was supposed to spend the day with Brad at Hogsmeade, but it's okay. There's always next time."

"I'll be sure not to land you in detention next time then," Sirius grins. We're at the Great Hall.

"Thanks for earlier, it was fun," I tell Sirius as we walk through the open doors.

We pause for a second and he says, "No, thank you. I'm a people person; I need to be around people most of the time. Besides, it was the least I could do after getting us thrown out."

I let out a short laugh. "Good point. Well, I'll see you tomorrow. Bye Sirius"

"Bye Jade."

With that, we both head to our respective tables.

So what do you think? Let me know!