In life, we take many things for granted. Be it food, water, shelter, family, or even the air you breathe. The list could go on endlessly. Much of our lives we consider to be a given, something that's guaranteed when you're born. For some, this applies more than others. One thing that almost no one would be considered something you could be deprived of would be your emotions. No matter where in the world you live, whether you're wealthy or in poverty, an orphan or in a huge family; no matter if you're fat, skinny, tall, small, big, little, or any combination of these, you're human. You have emotions. They show on your face and project to the world who you are and what you feel. They are universal. So what happens when you lose that ability, to project your emotion onto your face? What happens when, suddenly, you become unable to show anyone the turmoil inside of you?

When this happens, life itself changes. It's different than starvation, worse than isolation, and more frustrating and miserable than poverty. No matter the joys in life you experience, no matter the sorrows of your every day you go through, the ability to communicate your thoughts and feelings is gone. It's like a link between you and the rest of the world is severed, and there's no way of mending it. The necessity of such a simple concept as facial expressions is staggering. It is more important than anything that you retain your ability to make them, or the life that you've known thus far will end entirely, and you will enter a misery that you hadn't even thought possible. The people lacking this ability are the furthest thing from living that there is, apart from death itself.

There is one such person "living" today, a girl locked in her large apartment in self-imposed isolation, rarely talking, rarely smiling. Smiling was in fact the only way her facial muscles really moved. Other than that, her face remained mostly stagnant, as it had for many years already. This wasn't by choice. Far from it. It had been a self-defence mechanism gone wrong. To protect herself from pain she wasn't ready to feel, she locked her world away in her heart and the key was lost to her. Forever floating in an unfeeling world, this girl found herself resurfacing in Tokyo, living under her godfather's care, the rest of her family long gone.

She lay at this moment, completely lost in her own grief, an anguished sorrow festering in her heart, on her couch. She'd woken up that morning, trudged down her steps, and collapsed on the creme colored material, and hours later, she lay in that exact position, in the silence. This was how most of her days went by, in nothingness. Occasionally, she'd remember to eat. Sometimes, she'd have enough energy to bathe. But mostly, she laid in various places in her apartment, and very, very rarely, she'd wake up with enough energy to do one of the only other things she ever did: create.

Over the years, when she'd still actively tried to make people understand her, she learned as much as she could about everything considered even remotely creative. By this point, she'd discovered ways to express a few, intense emotions through the violin, and rarely, through painting. Even with these though, few people ever experienced her emotions. Mostly, this girl kept entirely to herself. Over time, the amount she'd play or paint deteriorated, until her precious violin began collecting dust and her paints dried out. Since then, she hadn't done much. Her godfather often offered to get her new things, he was very proactive when it came to trying to get her out of the house. When it became clear that it would take a miracle to make her leave willingly, he began offering just to make her more comfortable there, but she rarely acknowledged even these attempts.

Desperately, he'd done the last thing he could ever think of to heal her broken soul, he'd found one last creative outlet, one that, perhaps, just maybe, would work for her. But it would be nearly impossible to get her to agree. That didn't stop him from trying though. It never would.

Lory Takarada stepped through the threshold of her apartment, finding his goddaughter exactly where he'd left her when he'd visited the previous week. The only difference this time was the faint notes of violin and piano in the background. She had on classical music. So…she's in a good mood then…that's a good sign, right? He thought, brushing a stray strand of black hair out of his face as he gathered the courage to speak to the petite girl laying on her couch.

"Saiyuka…" He said gently, calling her by name and giving her a small smile. Saiyuka, or Sai, as she was often affectionately called as a child, twitched at the sound of his voice and slowly, she moved to sit up. Falling around her pale face were thick, bright red strands of hair. They were freshly washed, another good sign, and hung down to her chin, frazzled and messy. Her icy blue eyes roved over to him, completely empty and hollow. She nodded to acknowledge him and scooted over on the couch.

Her gaze wandered through the room as he sat down, not focusing on anything, her face a completely blank mask. "Saiyuka," he repeated, and she turned and her eyes slowly came into focus on his face, "I've come today to ask you one last time if you'd try something for me."

She blinked once at him slowly, her thick lashes brushing against her cheeks, processing what he said. She opened her mouth to reply, her usually smooth and gentle voice coming out raspy and hoarse from maluse, "One last time?"

"Yes, my child. I can never comprehend how hard this is for you, but I can't make it any easier, barging in here all the time and claiming I've found the solution. So this is my last attempt."

She looked at him blankly, but underneath the still features, suspicion lingered. Lory was never one to give up, especially not on things like this, not on her. Which meant he was banking on this working, whole-heartedly. "Okay," she said softly, still straining to get her throat to produce the sounds, "What is it?"

He placed a folder on the coffee table near her, on it's front was a strange logo. It was a large yellow circle, with the bolded letters "SECTION" on the top and a white hand making and "L". To the side of the "L" was a heart, and a small "v" next to a small "e". Below the "L" were the letters "M" and "E". At the bottom were the lowercase words, "in L.M.E. production". Sai looked up at him curiously, not quite understanding the picture.

Lory spoke the words softly, trying his best to keep the smile out of his voice for her sake, "I'm calling it the "Love Me" section. It's a new department that I'm launching specifically for talents to find a place at LME even if they lack the ability to feel…or show "Love" for others…" He paused, trying to gauge her reaction, searching her face desperately for any twitch or movement.

Suddenly, the tiniest corners of her mouth lifted up and she blew out of her nose in a half-chuckle. "That's so like you…" she said softly, wiping her face with her hand and resting it on her cheek as she considered her next words, "And…you want me to join this section?"

"I want you to found it." He said determinedly. "You'll be the number one Love Me member, and I promise you, I swear Saiyuka, this will work for you. To be around people who understand the struggle of expressing yourself, to know what it's like to experience loss, to rise from nothing, to pick up the pieces of a broken life and make something out of it. These people understand that. If they can find themselves, maybe you can too. And this way, even though it's not quite…legitimate…" A guilty expression overcame his features, "I promise that you'll be safe there. Love Me is supposed to be like a haven for people with talent like you have, but hit a barrier when it comes to showing affection in some form or another for the world they live in."

So he pulled some strings for her. Sai felt a zap of pain shoot through her heart. She was always such a burden on him, but the more she thought about accepting, even just this one offer, just to try, panic seized her gut. She didn't want to go, she didn't want to try. Nothing was worth it anymore, not to her. Nothing would work. It didn't matter that this was a safe haven, and even though he'd gone through all the trouble of making and putting something this enormous together for her…she couldn't. Sai internally screamed out that she wanted desperately to do something, anything, to heal everything inside of her that was broken, but she couldn't bring herself to accept. It was too terrifying. Too painful.

"I'm sorry, Lory," she said, barely audibly, "I don't think I can do it…"

Suddenly, a heat seared through the President of LME's chest as he stared at this pathetic girl sitting in her apartment, staring vacantly at the wall. "So this is it then?" His voice boomed, riddled with anger and wrath, as he glowered down at her, his eyes swimming with a livid fury.

Sai's gaze snapped to him as he spoke to her in such a way, her mouth actually falling open a fraction of a centimeter. "W-what…what's it?" She asked him hesitantly, frozen to the spot.

"This is all you're ever going to do?" She flinched slightly at his words, said to her in such outrage. Sai curled up into a ball, hiding her face in her knees and refusing to look at him. When it became clear that she wasn't going to respond, Lory stood, his voice shaking in anger, "Do you truly plan to do nothing more than this, you spoiled child?" He boomed, his hissing rage making her hands tremble and true fear grasp her gut. He never acted like this, never. Not towards her, especially.

Sensing that he was truly scaring her, Lory knew he had to get out then if he wanted her to ever open up to him, so he whipped the folder back onto the coffee table, spilling its contents onto the floor. "At least do me a favor and read it, if nothing else." He snapped at her, once again making her tiny, collapsed form flinch.

Storming out of her apartment door, Sai listened until his footsteps faded and then a large slam could be heard as he threw her front door shut as hard as he could. She sat there for a few moments, which turned into a few minutes, until she'd been sitting in that curled up, tight ball for nearly an hour. When she slowly began to unfurl, her muscles immediately ached from holding such a tense position for so long. Gradually, barely moving, Sai lowered herself to the ground and began picking up each individual piece of paper. Once the file was back together, Sai sat on the ground and leaned her head back on the couch, feeling her emotions in her chest collapse into a heap of sorrow.

After far too long, the orange tint of afternoon light seeped in through her large windows, casting shadows on her face and through her apartment. Her eyes lolled lazily around the room, falling on the folder Lory had given her. Knowing she had a small window of opportunity, Sai took an extremely deep breath, before moving quickly for the first time in a long while. She snatched up the folder, laid it on her breakfast bar and set to work making a cup of coffee for the first time in months.

Once it was ready, she loaded it with sugar and began reading each word in that file. The more she read, the more she internally warred back and forth between hating the idea of Love Me and adoring it. The entire concept was so like Lory. She'd known him for her entire life, and he'd always been like this, so flamboyant and extravagant. This had his scent all over it. As she neared the end of the file though, she found that there was actually something burning in her chest, a fire that she hadn't felt since the first time she'd discovered music. She remembered Lory's words, and the awful tone of voice she'd forced him to use. "Do you truly plan on doing nothing more than this?" Is this what she wanted out of life? The answer was obvious. No. And sitting in front of her was the last chance she'd get to ever be something, be someone.

Finishing up her coffee, she actually washed the dish and placed the folder back on the table, feeling antsy for the first time since she could remember. To try and assuage this feeling, she put on one of her favorite dramas and actually found herself feeling enjoyment for it, her heart soaring when good things happened, a panging in her solar plexus which she'd only ever gotten around truly beautiful musical pieces. Marveling at this, Sai fell asleep that night wrapped in her blankets on the couch, the tv still on, and a tiny smile ghosting over her lips.

When light spilled into her living room the next morning, a foreign feeling was resting in Sai's chest. Excitement. Throwing the blanket off, she ran through what she'd done so many months prior every single morning. Walking to her bathroom with a spring in her step that she wasn't used to, Sai washed her bright red locks and wrapped herself in a jean button up blouse and a warm, charcoal colored cardigan. She slipped on comfortable navy blue leggings and knee-high brown leather boots. Staring at her reflection, Sai was surprised to see a color in her cheeks and a glitter in her pale blue eyes that fanned the already growing flame in her heart.

At the same time, a deep worry spread over her as she gazed at the familiarity of the person in the mirror. To lessen the visual similarities, Sai reached into a cabinet and pulled out a jar of foundation she'd used many years prior. Slathering enough of it on to cover the natural color of her cheeks and forehead, she evened it out and stared at a much blander face in the mirror. Still feeling as if it wasn't different enough though, she dug through her closet and found an old binder near the bottom. Wrapping it around her tightly, she cinched it in the back and redressed over the top of it. Looking at her reflection once again, Sai marveled at the difference. The makeup masked her rosy complexion and smoothed out her features, while the binder diminished her chest and the flowing cardigan narrowed her hips. It was perfect for detracting attention, she decided.

Glancing at the clock and seeing the time, Sai actually ran out of her bathroom and down the stairs, grabbing her coat off the rack and throwing it over her shoulders as she skillfully ran out her front door. Her muscle's responses were working better than she'd figured, most likely due to the adrenaline that pumped through her veins.

She approached the street and found her bike leaning on its kickstand. She often just referred to her as her "bike," but really the beloved vehicle was a full fledged motorcycle. The sleek design was complemented by bright red accents. Lory consistently tried to keep her from using it, offering company car rides and valet services, but she always declined. She adored the bike so much, she'd taken to giving it a name: "Lola," after her childhood pet. Throwing her leg over it, she pulled away from her apartment as if it was totally natural, feeling the wind whip through her still damp hair as she tore down the streets toward her godfather's talent agency.

As she entered the building, a receptionist with shiny black hair and a gorgeous smile greeted her, "Hello, my dear! What can I do for you?"

Sai returned the smile to the best of her ability, which was very lacking, but it seemed to have been enough, because the woman raised her eyebrows expectantly, waiting for a request from the redhead. "Um…" her voice cracked and she cleared her throat, trying again, "I need to speak with Lory Takarada, the President of the company. I don't have an appointment, but if you call and tell him that Saiyuka Akai is here, I'm sure he'll be willing to let me in."

Her eyes widened as the fiery haired woman spoke her name, "Did you say 'Saiyuka Akai'?" Sai blinked and nodded, her face returning to its blank state, "Oh! Mr. President already left me a note with your name, telling me to wave you in if you came by. But he said you probably wouldn't come…and he looked quite sad. Did you have a change of heart?" The woman looked up at her, blinking innocently.

Sai gave her a gentle smile, the corners of her lips barely turning up, "I did, yes. And I truly hope that it will make him happy."

The receptionist beamed at her, "I'm sure it will. If you go through those doors back there," she pointed to a large set of doors leading down a hallway, "You'll get to the elevator bay, and his office is on the top floor. You can't miss it, it's the entire floor." She offered Sai a sly smile and Sai gave her the best she could back. She bowed awkwardly to the receptionist, who nodded respectfully, and made her way through the doors.

Entering the elevator, Sai pressed the highest number she could find, her thoughts running wild. Do I really want to do this? What if…what if it goes badly? I…what would I do if that happened…? She shook her head wildly as the numbers climbed…It's better than sitting around and living a worthless existence! If I fail here, at least I tried something. If I just stay home, I don't even have a chance at living, and I want to live, I want to. So I'll do this, I'll commit my heart and soul to this. It's all I have.

A ding sounded throughout the enclosed space and the elevator doors slid open. Stepping out hesitantly, Sai looked at the daunting doors to Lory's office, a deep, rich oak wood that spanned floor to ceiling. Standing in front of them was a man, who at first seemed surprised to see her, but his expression soon returned to normal, waiting for her to approach. He was dark-skinned, a wonderful tan spreading over his body, which was mostly covered with garments that could have passed for those of a typical butler.

She very slowly walked toward him, bowing when she got close enough and watching as he did the same, "Ms. Saiyuka Akai, I presume?" He asked her carefully, looking into her eyes for any sign of recognition.

"Ah, yes…and you are…?"

He gave her a quick grin and said softly, "You may call me Sebastian, I'm the President's assistant."

She offered him a gentle smile, "It's wonderful to meet you." As a thought occurred to her, the smile she'd managed to get over her lips melted off, "Was I expected at all?"

Sebastian thought for a moment and then gave a slight nod, "Yes, but also no." He said, before considering that he wasn't sure that made sense to her, "Yes, he said you may come, but from his face, we assumed you wouldn't be coming. So yes, in a sense, you were expected, but did any of us really expect to see you? No." His smile grew, "So I suppose you'll start surprising us already, hmm?"

It seemed as though Lory might have divulged more than a few tales about her already; that was reassuring. She just about rolled her eyes at his antics, before falling entirely silent and looking at the floor as she waited for him to continue.

"Here," he gestured out to her, "he's in there." Pointing eloquently to the doors, Sebastian grasped their handles and pulled them open.

Sai stepped inside after gently expressing her gratitude. The moment she entered the room she was shocked with its grandeur. The room was enormous, with floor to ceiling windows that bathed it in natural light. Expensive furniture was all over, eclectic in their nature nearly as much as the man they belonged to. Decorations that had all kinds of themes lay throughout the space, discarded as if Lory had been digging through them to decide what the next theme would be.

The man himself laid on a couch in the center of the room, surrounded by papers, glasses perched on his nose. When she entered, he glanced up quickly and then returned to his papers. Suddenly, the face he'd just seen processed in his head and it hit him who had just walked in. His eyes snapped up to her form, his mouth dropping, before lifting up into an enormous smile.

"You came!" He said, the wrinkles and creases on his face melting away and returning him to his youthful appearance as he rose from the couch and enveloped her in an affectionate hug. "Oh, Saiyuka, I'm so happy you changed your mind."

He smiled at her excitedly, and gestured out widely towards his office, "Well! What do you think?" His voice boomed in the room, "This is LME!" He started walking back towards all his forgotten paperwork and pushed it off the table, causing Sai to laugh softly through her nose. "Can I get you some tea? Coffee?"

She smiled at him, shaking her head, "No, that's alright." She spoke gently, the raspiness in her voice gone, replaced by its usual smooth tone, "I had some coffee already this morning."

He nodded happily, humming to himself, "Okay then, that's alright. Here," he gestured toward the opposite couch, "have a seat!"

Sighing, but still smiling, Sai moved to sit down, gracefully placing herself on the fabric. She looked up at him and nearly burst out laughing. He looked like a five year old who was waiting eagerly to hear if they were going out for ice cream, or something. His eyes practically sparkled and he was staring at her expectantly. "So?" He asked her, his knee bouncing up and down, "What are you thinking?"

"I…" Sai hesitated, pushing her lips together before steeling herself and looking at him pointedly, "I accept. I want to try." She didn't think that Lory's face could get any brighter or happier than it had been, but the moment she spoke, it did. He jumped off the couch and howled in victory, which did actually cause Sai to laugh. He pumped his fists up and down and pointed to her,

"I knew it! I knew you'd come around!" He gestured around him, tossing a jacket over his shoulder with flamboyance, "This is going to be so good for you," he said, looking at her lovingly, "You'll heal, I promise. I'll make you happy again." He tussled her hair and beamed at her brighter than the sunlight pouring in through the windows. He'd always loved her like his own daughter, and technically, she was his daughter now. The thought filled him with happiness and determination to help her put the pieces of her life back together.

"Thank you, Lory…" She smiled up at him genuinely, the raw honesty and love in her voice made him smile back at her, just as sweetly.

Without warning, he clapped his hands together, causing her to jolt slightly in her seat, "Now!" He said loudly, clearly having no regard for an "indoor voice." Sai supposed that's one of the reasons he had his own floor. "You'll have to meet our talent coordinator! Let me call him up right now, this is more important than all those phone calls he never actually makes." Humming happily to himself, he picked up his phone and dialed it expertly.

"Sawara!" He yelled into it, shocking the man on the other end, "I've got good news!" His deep voice boomed. A series of shushing noises erupted from the phone, a result of the talent coordinator desperately trying to get the President to lower his voice.

"She accepted, Sawara! Isn't this great?" He said loudly still, laughing into the receiver, "I'll need you to come get her, of course, and show her around!" Lory said brightly, completely ignoring the other man's protests, "Oh I don't care about that," he said, waving away the man's other duties, "This is much more important." He declared, promptly hanging up then and turning to face his goddaughter.

"Isn't this wonderful?" He asked her, his smile so bright and flowery that it made the room thick with a sickeningly sweet joy. Not really noticing this though, Lory went about gathering up the papers he'd pushed onto the floor, humming to himself more and rocking on his heels.

They made light conversation, Lory being careful not to hurt or insult her, as it would ruin her gentle demeanor. Right when they were running out of things to say, Sebastian opened the door again and a ruffled, but clean-shaven man walked in, fuming, his ears bright red. He was tall, but not absurdly so, had no facial hair save for a thin line on his upper lip, and his black hair was combed back professionally. He kept up with his appearance well enough, but he was clearly unprepared to come up to meet the President. His shirt was untucked, the legs of his pants too short, his shoes with a splash of mud on the heel.

He entered the room, cleared his throat, and addressed Lory respectfully, although it was obvious he was slightly angered by the man, "Good morning, Mr. President." He said snippily, and then his eyes fell on Sai and he blinked a few times as he took in her appearance. She was…fairly average looking, and it surprised him. In his head, he was picturing some beauty that the President was eager to rush into the business, not even bothering to wait for her to pass an audition. But looking at her…his actions still made sense. She'd never pass an audition like that. Her complexion was clear, sure, but it was bland, nothing unique. Her physique was small, fit, but nothing to stare at. Her hair was the only defining quality, its bright red color searing and fiery. Perhaps her eyes would have normally attracted attention, but they were so blank and lifeless, that their startlingly deep, icy color was boring and stiff.

Realizing he'd let a disappointed expression slip, he quickly bowed to her, hiding his face by casting it down at the floor, "It's very nice to meet you, miss. I'm the head of the talent division here at LME. I'll also be acting as your de facto manager." He smiled at her politely, but made it clear that he was, in fact, not at all pleased with his current predicament. It was hard to go against the President though, especially when he was so excited for this. Sawara was used to his personality by now, and tolerated it better than most of the LME employees, but even he was surprised by how delighted and youthful the man looked. He just couldn't bring himself to say no.

Lifting his head, he looked at the young girl standing there, surprised by the complete lack of expression on her face as she bowed to him in return, "Good morning," she said stiffly. "My name is Saiyuka Akai. It's a pleasure to be working with you, thank you for taking me on as a charge, even by de facto." When she raised her head, her face was still unreadable, but she'd clearly just made a jab. The sarcasm in her voice had been blatant, but her face completely serious.

Sawara looked between Lory and Sai, wondering if she was always deadpan like this, and how on earth the two had met, much less how she'd convinced him to create an entire department for her. What's going on between these two…I can't quite put my finger on it…the air is too casual for a completely professional relationship…but it's not as if they're lovers…The more he looked at them, the more confused he got. Their relationship was unreadable.

"If you wouldn't mind, Sawara," Lory's deep voice resonated in the room, "Could you show Ms. Akai the building? Take her to the Love Me dressing room and such?"

Sai's gaze roved over to him, hearing him address her so formally, she knew that she was supposed to follow suit. "That would be very kind of you, Mr. Sawara. I'd appreciate it very much."

The manager looked between them again, before nodding and gesturing out for Sai to follow him. When they reached the door, he bowed once again before the President and watched as the young woman in tow with him did the same, "Thank you for your hospitality, Mr. President," she said carefully, cautious not to put too much emphasis on his title, so it sounded natural. "I'll do my best here."

He nodded to her politely, "Of course, Ms. Akai. Good luck." Sending her off with another enormous smile, he waved playfully and the door shut behind them.

As the talent head and his new charge made their way to the elevator, he noted how her face was still entirely blank, completely devoid of any emotion at all. Once they'd entered the small room he turned to her and decided to ask, hoping it would offset the unsettling feeling that was rising in his gut. "Ms. Akai, may I ask you something?"

Looking up at him without any change in her features, she nodded curtly.

"I know this may be personal, but I'd like to know if the reason that the Love Me section is the way it is could be because…" He stumbled, faltering on how exactly to ask her this.

"Because I don't show my emotions on my face, yes." She answered, knowing where he was going without needing any more of a prompt.

"Um…" He hesitated, watching her blink at him vacantly, "Is there a reason behind that?"

She considered this for a moment, and just when he thought she'd spaced out and hadn't heard him, she tilted her head in consideration and replied softly, "I'm fairly sure it was a protective measure. I did it when I was younger to prevent myself from reacting to the events that occurred then."

Sawara looked at her, shocked. His jaw dropping slightly and his voice leaving him. How was he supposed to reply to that? It wasn't as if he was blind to the fact that some people went through rougher childhoods than he had. He considered the President's granddaughter as a prime example. He couldn't imagine a life like hers. But this girl must have experienced something even worse than that, to have had such an extreme reaction. "Then…why…" his voice came out cracking a little, so he cleared his throat and tried again, "Why is it still like that?"

She looked at the floor of the elevator as it slowed to a stop, "I don't know." She said in a quiet, pained, meek voice. A scared one. She truly didn't know why, and it frightened her. Suddenly, it didn't matter to Sawara what the relationship between the her and the President was, because in that one moment of honesty she'd shared with him, he knew that he'd do anything in the world to prevent her from that fear. That's why she was here. To recover the abilities she'd lost that nearly every other living being had. She was here to become whole again. And he'd be there to help her every step of the way.

Smiling at her, Sawara gestured outward towards the hall, "Come on then, let's find out." She looked up at him and followed hesitantly as he stepped out into the lobby.

"Find out?" She asked softly, looking up at him.

"Yes," he said gently to her, "We'll all help you recover those emotions you've lost. Trust me." He gave her a confident smile and held his hand out for her to shake.

Watching him smile at her with such hopeful delight, she felt her own lips lift up in a grateful smile, surprising him. She reached out and grasped his hand, shaking it with vigor, "Thank you, Mr. Sawara," she said simply.

Grinning at her, Sawara understood the charm she held, even if she was plain looking. In just a few minutes, she had him excited to be her manager. He was aware of this, but he knew that it wasn't as if she was manipulating him by force, she just had this way of making people around her sense how she felt, and wanting to help her. It was strange, he'd never met someone with such an ability, but he respected her for it, rather than resented her for exerting that force on him.

He showed her around vague areas of the building, letting her know which floors the different departments were on, and where certain studios where. He also led her to the manager's floor, and showed her where to go if she ever needed help with a job or assignment. He took her to his office and explained how her current job would work for a while.

"Stamps?" She asked him, confused.

"Yes," he offered her a heart shaped box with the Love Me section logo on it, and when she popped it open, she found an array of stamps with different amounts of numbers followed by the word "points" on them, and an inkpad. "When you're hired by anyone, or you help anyone who knows of the department, you can ask them to stamp your book." He said, holding out another heart shaped item. Taking it gingerly, Sai flipped through the blank pages of the notebook.

She looked up at him curiously, "How will they know that I'm in the department?" She asked, actually feeling excited for this, and amused by how like Lory this concept was. "And what if they don't carry stamps?"

"Ah," Sawara snapped his fingers, remembering something. "Here," he said, handing her a bright pink fanny pack. Opening it up, Sai found that a set of stamps labeled with her name were in there, just like the ones in the box. "You'll carry those around with you, in case people don't have them. Always have that pack, even if you just keep it in your tote. You can put your notebook in there too."

Glancing between him and the pack, Sai placed the book inside of it and slid it into her tote. "Why did they make it a fanny pack? Wouldn't it have just been easier to leave it in a box?"

He looked at her in amusement, "You'll see!" He chimed, entertained by how she tilted her head at him to show that she was confused.

Walking back down to the lobby, he continued their conversation, "You asked how people would know that you're in the department, right?" He asked, as he led her down the hall to the Love Me offices.

"Yes, it seems strange that people would have to know my face in order to recognize the department I'm in, even if I'm the only one in it."

He nodded, "Makes sense," he said, gesturing for her to enter the dressing room. "Well you're right, there is something that will distinguish you from the rest of the employees here."

Pointing to one of the many lockers in the room, Sai spotted her name scrawled on a piece of tape across it. Walking past Sawara, Sai went up to the locker and looked at its outside, glancing back behind her at the man who was looking at her in amusement. He nodded to her encouragingly and she opened the locker hesitantly. Inside hung a bright pink jumpsuit. Not a good bright pink, if there was such a thing, it was an alarming, startling pink that actually hurt Sai's eyes the second she saw it. It was horrifyingly ugly. Which made it perfect for Sai.

She pulled it out of the locker and heard Sawara burst out laughing behind her, "Oh, that is ghastly," he squeaked out, grabbing onto a couch for support as he caught his breath.

Watching him, she huffed lightly, drawing his attention, "Well, I like it." She said softly, admiring the garment in her hand.

"Well I'm glad you're the one who's going to be wearing it, then," he said, recovering from his brief bout of laughter.

She looked at him and smirked softly, "May I try it on?" She asked him carefully.

"Oh, yeah of course. Here, I'll be right outside." He gestured toward the door and bowed out of it, barely containing the smile of apprehension he had.

Quickly, Sai slipped into the jumpsuit, which was surprisingly comfortable. Leave it to Lory to find something so entirely and completely ugly, yet still startlingly nice to wear. He was wonderful that way.

Once she was dressed, she turned and admired her reflection in the dressing room mirror. The suit clashed dreadfully with her deep red hair, the two offsetting and violently disagreeing with the other. It fell just right to make her chest look even more modest than the binder did alone, and the way it bunched and bagged near her hips made them look smaller and narrower. When she added the fanny pack, they were even more concealed. It was a disgusting outfit, much too bright and completely visually annoying, which meant that Sai adored it.

Combing her hand through her hair, Sai let loose a barely audible sigh and sat in the chair in front of the mirror. What am I doing here…? She asked herself, staring into those hollow, light blue eyes in her reflection. What do I want from this? Can I even get anything out of this place? Or am I just abusing it…I don't know…I don't know if this can even do anything for me. Maybe I'm just stalling for the inevitable…

Shaking her thoughts away, she tried to focus on something positive. Lory's face popped into her mind and she replayed how happy and elated he'd looked when she'd accepted, so youthful and carefree. If anything, she would do this for a while for him. She'd try, for him. And if it didn't work…she'd quit. She wouldn't abuse it.

Looking into the mirror again, she watched as her lips pulled up into a beautiful grin. Reaching out and touching the reflective surface, she admired how the tiniest tug at the sides of her lips expressed something so deep and beautiful. It was a marvel. Just a few facial muscles, and not even a fraction of a second, and something that was usually so internalized was suddenly there for the whole world to see. That was what a facial expression was. She could hardly fathom what it would be like if she could produce more than just the one.

Thinking on it, Sai tried to replicate the angered expression Lory had given her the previous day. He'd pulled his eyebrows down dangerously, knitting them together. His lips had been pressed into a thin, tight line and the wrinkles near his mouth had deepened. That was anger. Desperately trying to force her features to move like that, she looked helplessly as the face in the mirror remained stagnant, unmoving.

Sighing, the young redhead placed her forehead in her palm, trying to fight back the awful feelings of defeat that always arose when she felt like she was incapable of something. She hated this more than anything. If she couldn't ever show that she was angry, what was the point of being angry at all? How would she ever make a place for herself in people's lives if this was all she was ever capable of?

Thinking back to the previous night, Sai pictured the face of her favorite character on that school drama she'd watched. The kind, but shy girl who didn't understand how to make other people notice her. That was how Sai often felt. Misunderstood. Allowing herself to picture the situation of that young lady in the storyline, she felt her emotions and thoughts twist to match the girl's. Sai abandoned her thoughts, her emotions, and her personality.

Feeling as though she was absorbing the character, Sai flipped a mental switch and opened her eyes to find herself staring at someone else entirely. Watching her reflection, Sai thought of how that boy in the front row had ignored her again, she'd tried so hard to get his attention this time, working up the entire day to greeting him as he stood up to go to drama rehearsal. She'd practiced so many times, so many, in the mirror. And when she finally got up the courage, she said his name too softly and he walked right past her.

Picturing herself standing dejectedly in the empty classroom, Sai watched helplessly as the face in the mirror shifted. Her eyelids drooped, covering her eyes that swam with tears and lost focus, her lips pulling downwards at the corners. The inner ends of her eyebrows pulled up together, knitting in the center, and the other ends dipped lower down her face. Finally, as she stared at the reflection, her lower lip pulled forward and began trembling as her vision blurred from the moisture. There, in the reflection, was Sai's face, twisted and turned downward, the weight of the world crushing down on her shoulders.

In a flash, the character that Sai had been channeling vanished and Sai's mind returned to her, instantly registering how her face appeared in the mirror. An extreme sense of panic and shock set in immediately and Sai stumbled backwards, running into her chair and falling to the floor with a crash. She sat in a daze as she replayed that face again and again in her head, her pulse racing faster than it had in years, pounding in her ears loudly. Her blood rushed through her veins, hot and fast, as she sat petrified on the floor.

Once she'd regained her senses, Sai shot straight up and leaned against the counter to the mirror, raising shaking hands to her cheeks, touching them as if not really believing that it was truly her face she was seeing. Focusing hard, Sai tried desperately to mimic the expression again, but no matter how hard she tried, nothing moved the way she wanted it to. As herself, the expression refused to form. It was the character that Sai had let possess her for a moment that had made that face, it was acting. Clenching her fist so hard that it hurt her palm, Sai looked once again into the mirror, a faint light burning behind her usually so vacant blue eyes.

Acting. Acting had allowed her to express an emotion, for the first time in so long, something had allowed her to show a face other than happiness, and even though the face itself had been pained and agonizing, it was something, it was real. Sai clutched that thought as it if was physical and if she let it go, it would drift away. She had to nurture this, even if it killed her. This was her connection to the world itself now. She would give her absolute everything to this. She had to. It was her only chance. She would live, she would. And she would do it through acting.

"M-Ms. Akai?" She heard from behind her, causing her to turn around to see Sawara poking his head through the door worriedly, "Are you okay? I heard a crash…"

Seeing him, she stood up straighter and dusted off her uniform, picking up the chair next to her. She turned to him and gave him the most natural, gentle smile she'd made in what felt like forever, "I've never been better, Mr. Sawara." She said, the radiance in her smile shocking the manager, "I'm ready to do this."

He smirked at her, not even commenting on the uniform like he'd planned, because despite the fact that it looked awful, it radiated with her passion. The two somehow matched. And it suited her perfectly. This was going to be a ride to remember.