An orange streak darted between the branches of the forest trees, prompting a fierce rustling of the verdant leaves when the tailwinds hit. The streak weaved throughout the rest of the forest in a rapid and dizzying aerial dance.
It was a warm summer morning, and the sights and smells pleased Tails. To him, there was no better time to do it than during such a peaceful time of the day.
He dodged numerous tree limbs just as he tried to dodge his thoughts, but they kept coming back, stealing his peace. The "mishap," as he liked to call it, was something he hoped everyone would forget in the near future.
Due to the distracting nature of the thoughts, he decided to reflect while perching atop a tall tree he had just spotted nearby, close to a stream. He landed near the base of the highest stable limb that he could find and sat with his back against the trunk. He let out a sigh — quietly thankful for the gorgeous day — and thought back to the incident of Sonic biting off a particularly large piece of stupid. Good grief, was THAT ever a mistake.
• • •
It had been quite an extraordinary prank that dealt with a sound system. It consisted of a series of very loud, high-definition speakers around six inches high, placed around Shadow's house in a circle fifteen-feet out from the walls. Once situated, these blared a recording of intense "noisecore" music, which Tails likened to an audible paint-peeler.
Needless to say, Shadow was amused. The blast hit the house like a speeding train, rattling it as though there was a small earthquake and even cracking a few of the windows. The obnoxious noise resounded throughout the surrounding countryside in a deafening cacophony. This prompted Shadow to leap from his bed with enough speed to collide with the ceiling, leaving a large indentation. Following his regaining of balance, all he could hear was roaring laughter outside.
Shadow's rage had thus been awakened.
Sonic had been thrown into a fit of hysterical laughter, with tears of glee streaming down his face. This, of course, ended after Shadow exploded out of his beleaguered house, grunting like a madman and with visible smoke coming from his ears. The severity of the situation was put into perspective when Shadow attacked him with a large, gas-powered chainsaw.
Tails had been sitting in a tree during the ordeal and had actually gained a considerable amount of amusement from the event, but this entertainment lasted all too briefly. After Shadow had terrorized Sonic with the chainsaw enough, he noticed the giggling Tails perched upon the limb, scowled, and charged. Tails began to panic after seeing the irate black-and-red hedgehog terror coming at him, but his altitude in the tree had alleviated some of his worry. The worst Shadow could do was cut it down. Knock on wood. Ha, irony. Ugh.
Predictably, Shadow chose to do just that. This resulted in Tails panicking and sending himself airborne with his helicopter tails to relocate to another tree. The previous tree subsequently toppled onto a nearby house with a loud crash and a plume of dust.
He had thought Shadow would have given up by then, but that idea incinerated when Shadow chucked the still-activated chainsaw at him, narrowly missing his head. It detonated upon impact with a tree trunk, and smoking parts were scattered in every direction. Filled with rage, Shadow roared and began throwing rocks at high speeds, so the vulpine took to the sky once more and made his escape while dodging them.
Following the ordeal, Tails traveled home, had a breakfast of waffles and pie, and decided to wander into the adjacent forest to collect his thoughts.
• • •
Tails snapped back to the present after a bug landed on his nose, and he shooed it away. He jumped up and dove off the tree, dropping between the branches before spinning his tails like a prop and taking off. He zipped over and under the branches, around trunks and over logs, and was just about to cross a wide, rocky stream when he heard a brief whirring noise.
THONK.
He hit the ground and landed on his upper back, dazed. Okay, WHAT?
Confused and embarrassed, his mind buzzed with the question of how he could have collided with something since there had been absolutely nothing in his way. It wasn't like him to smack into something — he was better than that! Wasn't he?
As he sat there rubbing the pain out of his forehead, he saw to his right a light-gray, female fox wearing a green t-shirt and blue denim shorts. She appeared to be his age, but what truly struck him was how she, too, possessed twin tails. A short distance away, next to a small boulder, rested a small, black object resembling a CD case.
She groaned and opened her eyes while turning her head to Tails. Upon making eye contact, her eyes widened in shock. She jumped to her feet, but not without a stumble and a pounding headache. "What's the big idea?! Are you blind?!"
Oh goody, another one of those people. Guess I'd better apologize, Tails griped in his head.
Tails opened his mouth to reply, but before he could produce any sound, the scream of jet engines could be heard approaching fast. The stranger gasped as a silver, plus-sign-shaped robot came within view. It had a maneuverable turbofan engine situated vertically on each of its four points; a gun above and below its small, spherical center; and a trio of arms dangling beneath it, each ending with a clawed, eight-fingered hand.
Tails snatched the girl by the arm and pulled her behind a large, moss-covered boulder just before the machine roared into the clearing where they had just been standing. The girl's face first expressed shock, but quickly transitioned to irritation.
The robot scanned the area for its target using blue planar laser beams, then made numerous beeping noises after it noticed the CD-like object sitting on the ground. Intrigued, it made its way toward it.
Just as it was about to grab the object, however, Tails climbed atop the boulder and leaped onto the top of the robot. As it went into panic mode, Tails removed a small, handheld plasma torch from his belt pouch, severed the dorsal gun, then stuck the nozzle inside the resultant hole and scorched everything inside. The machine spun around, sputtered, and hit the ground right after Tails had made himself airborne. And that's how you kill a drone.
He kept his eyes fixed on the dead drone as he lowered himself back to the ground, then focused his attention to the item it had been after. That must be important. I wonder what it is.
Tails approached the object, prompting the awestruck stranger to panic and run out into the open. "Hey, stay away from that!"
Tails ignored her and picked it up, curiously observing it. "You're welcome. What's this for?"
She snatched it from his grasp with a sneer. "Gimme that! It is a very important piece of software I stole from Robotnik earlier, and I had everything under control until you clumsily bumped into me. So yes, thank you."
Tails narrowed his eyes. The thankless venom in her words was something he didn't need. "Obviously. You would have just kept running until it eventually tracked you down to your base of operations, alerted that corpulent maniac, and then slaughtered you and your friends like herd animals."
Her following expression indicated a hint of remorse, but only just, and was followed by a frown. "Well, I still could have handled it." Who does he think he is? Jerk.
Tails rolled his eyes and walked off. This surprised her — she had expected a rude response like everyone else. She began to say something, but stopped herself mid-word. Tails noticed this, but kept walking.
Dangit! That smug little... She rushed over to catch up to him. "Hey, uh, I-I actually need somebody to decode it. I don't have the equipment I need. If you don't either, I'd appreciate it if you'd point me in the direction of someone who does. It's kind of important." And if you keep ignoring me, then so help me, I will hurt you.
Tails stopped, a faint smirk having crept along his muzzle to accompany a raised eyebrow. Gotcha. "I have decoding equipment. If you'd like, you could accompany me to the Freedom Fighter headquarters. We'd be more than happy to help."
Her eyes widened slightly at the mentioning of the famous group, although she immediately regained a serious composure. "That sounds good."
"All right. Follow me."
The two foxes spun their tails like propellers and took off in the direction of the Freedom Fighter headquarters.
• • •
Within the HQ, Sonic was in the process of informing Knuckles about the occurrences of the hours previous, and each sentence was fragmented with intermittent laughter, tears again streaming down his face. "And...and I actually HEARD his skull smacking against the ceiling, even over the speakers! It-it was so epic!"
The red echidna merely flattened his brows and gave his associate a stern look. "Sonic...you've told me that story three freaking times already. I GET it. You pranked Shadow super-hard this morning. It's NOT FUNNY anymore...and it's giving me a migraine. Your VOICE...please SILENCE it."
Sonic exploded into laughter once again, giving Knuckles a swat on the shoulder that nearly triggered the Apocalypse itself. In the meantime, Tails quietly entered through the front door with the gray newcomer in tow. Within her right hand was the black object that the robot from before had coveted so deeply.
With curious eyes and silent enthusiasm, she examined the place, although taking care to express none of her emotions openly. This was it — THE Freedom Fighter headquarters. These were the people who were able to go toe-to-toe against THE Doctor Robotnik, one of the greatest and most malevolent minds on the planet. Visiting such a place was like winning the lottery.
Most of the Freedom Fighters were seated on a series of couches that faced a large television. Antoine and Rotor were playing against each other in Super Smash Siblings: San Andreas. The others were watching with intrigue and amusement, periodically hooting and hollering their enthusiasm. The exception was Sally, who was in another room; and NICOLE, who was in the computer room.
The sound of the door caused Rotor to turn his attention away from the game just long enough to see who was coming in, although his game character got hit by a cruise missile as a result. "Hey Tails! Welcome back! Who's your new friend?" He snapped back to his game in a panic, only to see a fiery crater where his character had been. "Oh."
Antoine erupted into frantic laughter. "Ceci est votre mort glorieuse!"
"Yes, I see that!" Rotor's reply came with a bitter scowl.
Meanwhile, the walrus' jovial and uninformed insinuation of friendship only served to ignite her hair-trigger temper, and her two tails puffed up a bit. "I'm not his new friend. I'm in need of assistance for an information chip I snagged from Robotnik earlier."
Her rudeness startled Tails and incited a wince — Yeah, this isn't gonna last long — and he turned his attention to Rotor. "We sorta bumped into each other a few minutes ago. She was being pursued by one of the Bloated One's cronies, so I crushed it like usual. The chip must be of particular importance if Robotnik wanted it back badly enough to send a specialized type of flying thug. The thing was actually menacing looking."
Seated next to Antoine was Bunny, who chimed in with her characteristic Southern accent, "Well, we're cert'nly glad ta have ya here, miss, eh..."
"My name is Kaolin, and I would appreciate it if this was done quickly, because it won't be long before Robotnik sends more of his mechanized irritants to hunt me down."
"That would be my job," said NICOLE as she, in her corporeal-holographic form, walked over to the newcomer. "I am NICOLE, the supercomputer of the Freedom Fighters. If you would, please allow me to take that off your hands, and I shall decipher it for you."
Kaolin was at first skeptical of the lynx's claim of being a supercomputer, but the occasional aberration in her projected form confirmed this. Reluctantly, the fox handed it over to the artificial entity. She wasn't too keen on trusting intelligent machines with anything — not after her previous experiences with Robotnik's goons throughout her life.
NICOLE gave her thanks and sauntered into the large computer room to analyze the data.
Sally followed NICOLE into the room shortly thereafter, gazing up at the streaming data with intrigue. There was no way she could make anything of it at the speed of her electronic associate. "What's it say, Nicky?"
"It appears as though Robotnik is enriching a variety of fissile materials, and using new methods to do it. It says he is planning to build his own thermonuclear weapons. There is a map showing where his facility is."
NICOLE brought up a separate screen, allowing Sally to observe the map. The latter's expression transitioned from fear to bewilderment. "Does that say Yellowcake Bakery?"
Everyone within earshot started to chuckle and snicker. Amy spoke first, giggling and shaking her head. "Another dumb name. It's like those Egg-Grape Chambers at the Egg Vineyard, or the Egg Fleet, or the Egg-Beater. The guy has no taste whatsoever in naming his garbage."
Julie-Su burst out into laughter; Knuckles followed, despite his prior state of irritation.
Breaking the atmosphere of hilarity, Sonic shot up from his chair with narrowed eyes and pointed into the air. His other hand was grasping an empty can of soda. "My fellows, it has come to my attention that another mission is at hand! Let us go forth, brethren, and extinguish the threat before it leads to cataclysmic suffering and ruin!"
The team looked at him as though he was insane, due to his uncharacteristic usage of more sophisticated dialogue.
Rotor recoiled. "O-...okay..."
A grin traveled across Tails' face, unfazed by Sonic's behavior. "Looks like I get to drive!"
"No, Tails. I need you to stay here with Rotor and NICOLE to monitor the mission progress. It is much too dangerous fo-..."
Tails cut Sonic off in a burst of frustration. "Hey! Last I checked, I'm part of the team TOO. I build. I repair. I drive."
"Yes, and you can play a part by helping with the satellites."
"Let me come along."
"Not this time."
"Wh-..."
"I'm so glad you agree! Come, friends! The Rotund Menace beckons!"
Tails splayed his ears in anger, but said nothing in response. What on Mobius has gotten into you, Sonic?
A few of the others questioned Sonic's decision to leave Tails with Rotor, but eventually agreed with his reasoning. Still, something seemed a bit...off. Sally noticed this the most.
As the group gathered equipment needed for the operation, Kaolin observed Tails' crestfallen attitude at his blue friend's callousness. She thought about comforting him, but her ego pushed itself in the way. Eh, he had that one coming.
She turned her attention to the others, but continued watching Tails in her peripheral vision as he accompanied Rotor. "It appears my purpose here has ended. If I may have my chip back, I shall be bidding you all a good day."
NICOLE handed her two chips: the original, and a deciphered version. Kaolin hastily grabbed them, thanked the gang, and departed. However, when she heard Tails tell her it was nice to meet her, something deep down inside felt...shaken.
She went outside and stood next to a nearby tree, wondering if she should leave. She had nobody else — no parents, no friends, no teammates, no boyfriend. Part of her yearned to go back in and offer her services, and perhaps even request to become a member of the team. Deeper still, however, she knew what it really was.
She liked Tails.
When she had bumped into him — well, after she had regained coherence — she couldn't help but notice that he had two tails as well. He was the first of her kind that she had ever seen that wasn't her own reflection. Silently, she was thrilled that she wasn't the only freak in the world. He wasn't a bad looking freak, either. She had been impressed by his strength and bravery when he defeated the robot, and knew he was right when he said she didn't have things under control. She had been truly scared during the pursuit.
Thoughts raced through her mind as the Freedom Fighters rocketed off in a small hovercraft — she barely noticed them as a result. Not wanting to leave, she flew up onto a branch, reclined on the trunk, and resumed thinking.
Around thirty minutes later, she heard a shriek within the headquarters, nearly causing her to tumble off her perch. The sound had been Tails, who had just discovered that his comrades had been captured by that grotesque genetic anomaly called Robotnik. The front door swung open, and Tails darted out and into the sky. Out of curiosity, she decided to follow him, flying above and behind so as to stay out of sight.
• • •
As the two foxes made their way to the Yellowcake Bakery, Robotnik was cackling absurdly as he watched his captives perform janitorial duties, due to control collars he had placed around their necks.
"How does it feel, rodents? HOW?! Ha ha! It's humiliating, isn't it? You get caught with your pants down one moment, knocked unconscious with gas another moment, and end up as my new slaves! I find this terribly amusing, but even more so because I know you are still aware of your surroundings! BWAHAHAHAHA!"
While dusting an energy capacitor and wearing an especially humiliating maid's outfit, Sonic shouted, "You have gone WAY too far this time, Ro-butt-nik! You wo-..."
Robotnik interrupted, "Won't what? Get away with it? Silly flea magnet, I ALREADY HAVE! You fell into my trap so EASILY! You were totally off your game! Tell me, were you enjoying that new soda you found at the store earlier?"
Sonic looked confused for a moment., but then the horrifying realization hit. "That soda was fake, wasn't it?!"
"Ha ha, yes! I made it to prepare you for failure, and fail you did! Now look at you, you have absolutely NO control over your movements aside from speech. Speaking of which, that little freedom is about to be repealed as well. I command each of you to SING! Sing praises and hymns to your new master! And do it in the form of...OPERA!"
Unable to resist, Sonic, Sally, Amy, Knuckles, Julie-Su, Bunny, and Antoine began chanting various fawning phrases in an exaggerated, operatic manner. Robotnik could hardly contain his overwhelming glee.
"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! This sails beyond the realm of entertainment! Laugh with me, Snively, LAUGH WITH ME!"
Snively looked up at his uncle, unamused, "Do I really have to? Scrubs is on, and I kinda..."
"DO AS I SAY, NEPHEW! LAUGH!" blurted the maniacal doctor. His face was turning crimson red from his jolly outburst.
Snively halfheartedly joined in on the laughter, frustrated by the fact that he was missing a brand-new episode of his favorite television show. It didn't have the same actors or actresses as the original from twelve-thousand years in the past, but the remake was just as funny. He silently wished that his uncle would drop dead from a massive heart attack, just so he would shut up and let him enjoy some quality televised programming. The concept actually seemed highly probable, since Robotnik was immensely obese and laughing harder than he had previously thought possible.
In an instant, Robotnik contained himself. He cleared his throat and dramatically pointed toward Amy. "YOU! Pink thing in red! Approach your glorious king!"
In tears, Amy complied. When she got within four feet, he commanded her to stop and demanded her silence. "So, uh, what's your opinion on cosplay?"
She lost all color in her quills, and her pupils shrank to pinpricks.
• • •
Meanwhile, Kaolin was struggling to keep up with the orange hero. She almost lost control when she was hit by the shockwave resulting from Tails achieving transonic speed. As he broke the sound barrier, a vapor cone very briefly appeared around his torso.
It wasn't long before they reached their destination. Tails plowed through a metal wall using a spin-dash, sending shrapnel flying. Kaolin slowed down and landed as quietly as possible, then peered through the hole to observe the unfolding event.
As Tails came to a stop, he was mortified by what he beheld. Not only were his friends singing obnoxiously loud while meticulously cleaning various things, Amy was dancing in front of Robotnik like a monkey while wearing an appropriate outfit: a monkey costume. The large man looked like he was about to explode from his uncontrolled laughter.
Snively noticed the orange fox first and tapped his uncle on the shoulder. "Uncle! We have an intruder!"
Robotnik came to his senses and looked at Tails, but then took on an insidious smile. "Ha ha! I was wondering when you'd get here! SNIVELY, activate the trap!"
Tails stepped out of the way as a trap-door opened in the floor beside him. He glared hatefully, but in a concerned manner as well. "You sick pervert. This pushes it."
"And what will you do, you little ginger stain? You're a pathetic, juvenile furball who couldn't harm me if he wanted to!"
With a menacing grin, Tails grabbed a long metal pipe nearby, ripped a segment from its sockets, and tapped the end on his hand. "Your butts are my property, now."
Robotnik chuckled darkly and grabbed a different pipe segment from a crate of parts nearby. "We'll see about that, child. I truly doubt you will be able to claim ANY property without a staggering amount of effort. You underestimate my skills."
Sensing an opportunity to escape both the impending madness and watch his favorite show, Snively took off through an adjacent doorway and down a hall.
It was said, on that day, that the single worst beating in recorded history was dealt upon Robotnik and Snively. Every living individual in the Robotnik/Kintobor family line felt an unusual stinging sensation all over their bodies, and each of Docor Robotnik's ancestors literally rolled in their graves. The flogging lasted every bit of ten minutes, and after Tails was done, the two were lying on the floor, twitching, and covered in throbbing lumps.
As he observed their pain, Tails concluded, "You're both nothing more than weak baby manchildren. A collective Muffin McWeaksauce! Remember this day, and remember it well, as I have spared your lives only so you could wallow in the fact that a young fox swiftly handed your butts to you on a silver platter. No, scratch that, a GOLDEN platter, with shimmering diamonds of lamentation lining the edge. Never, ever show your faces to me again, or you will face retribution far surpassing the magnitude of today."
With that, Tails freed his friends and made his way to his point of entry. When they were at a safe distance, he used his phone to call G.U.N. for an airstrike.
Kaolin flew atop the building and secretly waited for the group to depart. She was extremely impressed by Tails' display of power over those two clowns, and this only increased her interest in him. She observed as the hovercraft took off, and followed it as it got far enough away. Moments later, two G.U.N. aircraft roared overhead and obliterated Robotnik's reactors with powerful demolition bombs.
• • •
Over the course of a few days, Kaolin stalked her person of interest. This was usually carried out by spying on the HQ with a pair of binoculars, quietly observing him as he shopped for groceries, or hovering above him as he did things outside or went on missions.
One day, as Tails was exploring the forest for wild chives, a gust of wind caused Kaolin to lose stability as she hovered high above, and her tails spun harder to regain her balance. Tails' ears caught the sound, and he managed to get a glimpse of his stalker as he rounded the corner of a wooded path.
Tails buzzed over to a vine-covered cave entrance, where he landed on the soft soil and jogged inside. Kaolin hovered in place for a few moments, but her inquisitiveness prevailed again, and she flew down to see what Tails was up to.
She peeked inside, curiously scanning the area with her piercing blue eyes, and noticed some sunlight cascading through an exit at the end of the cavern. Tails was nowhere to be seen. As she turned around, she came face-to-face with Tails himself, and zipped into the air after nearly coming unglued.
"Why are you stalking me?" asked the orange hero.
"Don't you know it's rude to sneak up on people like that?!" she exclaimed while trying to catch her breath.
"I can't say it's polite to stalk, either."
She lowered herself back to the ground and sheepishly shot her gaze at a large tree nearby. "I was...observing your actions...just, uh..." — She knew she couldn't hide it — "G-getting to the point, I want to join the Freedom Fighters. I've seen how you and your friends work, and it interests me."
Totally knew it. Tails approached her with a grave look in his eyes. "Being a Freedom Fighter can be very hard and dangerous work. Some of our team members have been injured and even killed before. Are you sure you want to make that commitment?"
Her expression grew more somber as she shifted her eyes to the ground. While she had gone through this scenario dozens of times in the form of wishful daydreams, she never expected to be hit with the actual question.
Despite her anxiety, she was determined to go through with this. "I witnessed the deaths of everyone I knew and loved. I even had to watch my own parents suffer before they died, and all because of that hideous waste of existence we all lovingly refer to as Doctor Robotnik."
She then looked Tails in the eyes and continued, "I am fully willing to accept the risks involved." Most of her reason was, of course, being close to Tails.
The pain in her eyes spoke volumes of what she had been through, causing Tails to feel genuine empathy for her for the first time. "Okay. Let us head back to the HQ, then. We'll have to consult the senior members before anything official occurs."
• • •
The two returned to the HQ, and Kaolin made a silent promise to herself to control her anger. After the team had heard Kaolin's story and how she managed to get the chip from Robotnik, she was accepted as a new Freedom Fighter.
One week later found them enjoying a tournament in a comically violent fighting game. Without warning, NICOLE rushed into the room and informed the group of a serious emergency downtown. Bean had taken hostages in a large bank, and not only was he wearing a very powerful suicide vest, he was making insane threats right and left.
Tails jumped up from his seat and turned his attention to Kaolin. "Ready for your first mission, Kaolin?"
Kaolin gave a confident smirk. "Absolutely."
The Freedom Fighters gathered into a circle, gave some words of encouragement to each other, and headed out on their new mission.
Fin
Sonic the Hedgehog characters, objects, and places are copyright of Sonic Team and Sega.
Scrubs is copyright of Bill Lawrence and ABC Studios.
Kaolin, story, etc are copyright of myself, NuclearCookout.