I'm currently working on updates for When You Find You, Come Back To Me and If You're Not Happy, Just Leave! Until then here's a revised version of a "one shot" that I did for tumblr. I hope you like it and please review!
Ezra pulled his car up next to the curb at Emily's house. Aria stared at her hands.
"Ezra, I don't want to go in there" Aria confessed.
Ezra took Aria's hand knowing there was nothing he could say.
Caleb and Hanna were standing on the sidewalk, Caleb held a pink box Aria guessed was donuts and Hanna had a tray of coffee.
"I don't even have anything" Aria said guiltily.
Hanna waved at Aria and she sullenly got out of the car.
At around 130 last night Ezra had come by the fields house and after a few glares from Mrs. Fields he and Aria had left.
Once in the safety of Ezra's car she burst into tears.
"I don't know how much more I can take Ezra" she'd sobbed.
She had cried for hours before falling asleep.
She needed to be strong for Emily now. Hanna too.
"Hi" Aria said weakly
Hanna handed the coffee tray to Caleb and pulled Aria into a hug.
At about 3 Caleb had shown up with burgers and fries for everyone (although Emily didn't eat) and after they'd eaten he took Hanna home.
Ashley had said nothing when Hanna and Caleb had curled up in Hanna's bed. It had been a horrible night, she went from feeling heartbroken that Mona was A, she was beside herself thinking about the grief Emily was going through, the girl she loved had been murdered, again, in the few free moments she was plagued by guilt because she still had Caleb.
"Where's Spencer?" Aria asked hesitantly.
"I don't know" Hanna said "I called her, but she hasn't called me back"
"How can she just ignore us at a time like this?" Aria demanded
"Well" Hanna suggested "her and Toby are probably, ya know" Hanna said rolling her eyes.
"Hanna!" Caleb and Aria yelled simultaneously.
The three of them walked up to the door, Aria knocked on the door nervously.
Mrs. Fields answered.
"Oh it's good to see you girls she said hugging Aria and Hanna as if they'd been away for months as opposed to hours.
They brought the coffee and donuts into the kitchen maybe it would lure Emily out of bed.
Mrs. Fields led the girls upstairs,
"So what time did Spencer finally leave?" Hanna asked.
Mrs. Fields turned towards them with a half hearted smile, "she didn't" Mrs. Fields went back downstairs.
Hanna and Aria looked at each other.
"We suck" Hanna whispered to Aria.
"You're not helping" Aria said feeling even more guilty.
As they opened the door to Emily's room they couldn't believe what they saw.
"She's right" Caleb said "we suck"
When Caleb and Hanna had left last night Emily was still crying (or more like wailing) she and Spencer were still in their party dresses.
Now they were in sweats. Emily was curled up in the fetal position, wedged between Spencer and Toby. Toby had Emily cradled against his chest, and Spencer and Toby's laced hands rested on Emily's side.
Toby noticed them first, he released Spencer's hand, running a finger down her cheek to wake her. With very little movement Toby and Spencer pulled up their legs making room for Aria and Hanna at the end of the bed.
They sat there in silence until Emily finally spoke.
"I keep thinking the same horrible thing" Emily said. She sat up then turning away from Toby.
"I keep thinking that I wish Ali was here" she started to cry "she always knew what to say, always" she sobbed.
"If you bombed a test" Spencer said
"If the boy you liked was dating someone else" Aria added
"If your parents were too busy screaming at each other to pay any attention to you" Hanna mused
"Ali always knew what to say" Spencer said.
"What do you guys think Ali would say if she were here today" Emily asked tearfully
"She'd say Maya was lucky because she never had to get sick or old" Hanna said
"She'd say that when the sun shines, you'll feel Maya's spirit in your heart" Aria said grabbing Emily's hand.
"And then she'd smile and say 'at least you still have me Em'" Spencer said with small smile.
Emily could hear Ali say those things, those things were Ali type things to say.
"This sucks" Toby said breaking the communal reverie.
They all glared at Toby.
"That's what she'd say, she'd say this sucks, she'd tell you her heart was broken into a million pieces for you, she'd say that she hates that she can't fix this for you, you best be sure I am going to give the man upstairs an earful"
Emily looked intently at Toby.
"That's what she said to me when she found out my mother died"
The girls looked at him perplexed.
"Yeah uh spoiler alert, Ali and I used to be friends, before my mom died" Toby said "she made an "Alison" comment about my mother and I told her to leave. She wanted to make amends after she found out she was dead"
Emily thought about this, she couldn't picture Ali being nice to Toby.
"Ali never apologized to anyone" Emily said thoughtfully
"I wish she would have waited" Toby said.
"Our lives would have been a lot different if she had" Toby said
"How do you mean?" Emily asked
"I wasn't ready for her to apologize, I slammed the door in her face" Toby said. "If I'd accepted, Jenna would still be able to see, I wouldn't have gone to reform school for a year, and I probably would have started dating Spencer sooner"
They all looked perplexed again.
"I've been in love with Spencer since I was ten"
When he still saw confused looks he went on.
" there was this bookstore, it's closed down now but it was called "stacks and racks" and she would sit in this space between bookshelves and read" Toby said lost in the memory. "Well, one day the owner goes over to her and says 'this is a bookstore, not a library if you want to read the book, buy it' so she pulls out a twenty says ring me up for the book, keep the change to leave me alone"
Everyone laughed, "that's Spencer" Hanna said with a smile.
Even Emily was smiling.
Emily got up then, when everyone looked at her cautiously she stated "I have to go to the bathroom"
She took Spencer's hand and the two left the room.
"What's that about?" Aria asked Toby.
"Don't ask" Toby said stretching now that he was free to move.
Emily returned with Spencer a few minutes later.
She hugged Aria and Hanna, and smiled weakly at Caleb before crawling back into Toby's waiting arms.
"Im glad you guys are here" she said "it's just not fair!" She started crying again. Toby pressed her tightly against his chest, as she sobbed Spencer rubbed her back in a circular motion much like you would do with a child. Emily looked very childlike at the moment.
When Spencer thought no one was looking, she ran her hand over Toby's jaw line running her fingers into his hair. Toby ran his free hand up and down Spencer's forearm.
Aria and Hanna looked at each other and rolled their eyes.
Caleb, who'd taken a seat on the floor by the bed so he could still hold Hanna's hand gave Hanna a look.
Hanna kicked Toby lightly in the ass, before standing "you're hogging Emily" she said with her hands on her hips. Toby smiled before releasing Emily, as he stood up Hanna gave him a quick hug before settling in next to her bestie, Emily awoke enough to know she'd changed handlers. "Call me if you need anything" Toby said looking to Hanna and Caleb. They nodded. Toby walked around the bed, he took Spencer's hand but didn't pull her away from Emily, like he wanted to.
Spencer got up off the bed. Aria quickly took her spot next to Emily.
Spencer said sleepily "like he said if you need anything..."
"We'll call" Aria confirmed
Spencer and Toby quietly let themselves out.
They walked hand in hand to the truck. They sat in silence for a few minutes. Finally Toby spoke "do you want me to take you home?"
"No" Spencer said
Toby started the truck and they drove around for awhile. Eventually Toby pulled over onto a dirt road surrounded by trees.
Spencer climbed into his lap kissing him, "I'm so glad you wanted this too" she said breathlessly "I felt horrible for leaving Emily but boy did I want this, I've missed this"
He pulled her close to him, kissing her.
She pulled away from him getting off his lap and slipped over to the other side of the truck.
"Come over here and get me" Spencer said
Toby leaned over wrapping an arm around Spencer kissing her once more, they ended up horizontal on the seat of the truck kissing passionately.
"I want to make love to you" Toby blurted out.
"I want you to" Spencer said
"Hold that wonderfully glorious thought" Toby said
He started the truck and drove 3 miles to the Edgewood motel.
They sat there in silence.
"Are you sure?" Toby asked.
"Yes" Spencer said.
Spencer stood in the room not knowing what to do with herself.
Would it hurt she wondered. Toby came out of the bathroom.
"Did you change your mind?" Toby asked noting the expression on her face.
"No I want this, I want you" she said "we could have done this in the truck" she said as he kissed her neck.
"No, not your first time" Toby said seriously. "Someday, we will but not tonight"
He kissed her but then pulled away
"You're shaking" Toby said looking concerned.
"I'm just nervous" she said trying to brush it off. Toby took another step back.
"Is it going to hurt?" Spencer asked.
"It might, at first, I'll try my best to make sure it doesn't" Toby said
"I'll be gentle"
Spencer said nothing.
"We should wait" Toby said "you clearly have doubts"
"Let's just sleep" Spencer said
"Ok" Toby said without a hint that he was upset.
Spencer went into the bathroom to wash up.
Toby was such a good guy, he'd always loved her, been good to her, she'd always been safe with him.
He was laying on the bed in his boxers with his eyes closed when Spencer came out of the bathroom.
"Toby?" He looked over to her, she untied the drawstring on her sweatpants and let them fall to the floor. She walked to the bed and climbed on top of him.
"Make love to me" Spencer pleaded.
. . .
Spencer was laying on top of Toby basking in the sunlight coming in from the blinds.
"Wow" Spencer said "just wow"
"Did it hurt?" Toby asked curiously
"No I should have known it wouldn't, you always take care of me"
Toby's phone rang and he picked it up and furrowed his brow.
"Who is it?" Spencer asked
"My other girlfriend" Toby said chuckling, Spencer lightly smacked him
"Hey what's up?" Toby said
"Hey Toby it's Aria" said the voice on the phone
"Oh hey Aria" he said like the name was foreign to him "what's up?"
"Well, Em's up moving around now and she wants us all here but I can't get a hold of Spencer, do you know where she is?"
"She probably left her phone in my truck"
Toby pulled the phone from his ear "you better get dressed, the girls want us back over at Em's"
"We'll be there in about 20 minutes do we need to bring anything?" Said back into the phone "nope, bye" Aria said hanging up quickly
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