Setting: A Paris, France opera house. 1870.

Plot: A certain person has stolen Erik's mocha lattes, so he devises up a revenge plan for whomever has stolen his lattes.

Erik: Ok, who has my mocha lattes?

-Every one is silent-

Erik: -grabs Christine- THEN...SHE...BELONGS...TO ME!

-Raoul stands up aburptly and Erik's mocha lattes spill on the people below him-

People Below Raoul: THAT STUPID FOP! WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING STEALING MOCHA LATTES FROM PHANTOM GHOSTS?

-Erik suddenly cuts the rope holding the chandlinder-

Erik: THAT IS FOR STEALING MY MOCHA LATTES!

-Erik quickly wips out his camera and snaps a couple of pictures of the falling chanlender-

Erik: Those will come out nicely. Maybe I will make them as Christmas cards. With all those screaming people below it.

Christine: -Takes camera and takes a couple of Raoul hiding in Box 5 screaming- And those will look good on Myspace!

Erik: What the hell is Myspace?

Christine: Only the most popular webstie for people to meet other people, but you have to be wary about some of them...they are really creepy sometimes.

-Erik rolls his eyes and thinks "Stupid girls and their insolent websites just to meet guys. I mean what is wrong with me, I may have a disfigured face but I AM the hottest in this opera house, next to Carlotta."-

-Christine and Erik drop down trap doors leading to his lair-

Erik: Hey, lets wait and see if the Fop will notice you are gone.

Christine: Yeah, -Then she adds this under her breath- then you can tie him up to your front gate and then I can kiss you in front of him and hear him whimper.

Erik: What's that?

Christine: Oh nothing, just saying how nice it would be if you could tie him up to your gate.

Erik: MWHAHA! THAT IS AN EXCELENT IDEA!

Raoul: -In an overly scared voice- Why does this man live down here? It is soooo moldy and mildewy! -screams- OH MY GOODNESS! IT IS A RAT AND HER BABIES! THEY HAVE COME TO FEAST UPON ME!

NOOO! AT LEAST LEAVE MY HAIR ALONE! OH DEAR, NOT MY MANICURE OR PEDICURE! I JUST GOT THEM TODAY! -screams once again-

-Raoul is at the gate and is whimpering to let him inErik rolls his eyes and lets the poor Fop in-

Erik: Stupid girl.

Raoul: -In a girl voice pretending to be manly- Ok! I shall fight you for Christine!

Christine: Ohhh, but what if he wins, doubt he will though, but there still is an 'if'. Then I will be forced to live in his house. -Suddenly rolls up in a fedal position mumbling words of no-

Erik: -Puts his hand on Christine's shoulder- Christine, are you ok?

Christine: NO MORE PINK! NO MORE! I SAID NO MORE PONIES DAMMIT! -cries-

Erik: -Turns on his heels towards Raoul- DID YOU...STEAL MY MOCHA LATTES!

Raoul: Maybe, but! I am ready to fight.

-Raoul stops midway to Erik's house entrance when Erik jumps down to where the fop is standing and drags him to Erik's gate and ties him up to his gate-

-Christine snaps out of her visions and sees that Raoul is about to be panjabbed and Erik turns around to face Christine-

Erik: It's either him or me!

-Christine moves to the lake, stops, but moves to Erik and makes out with him for five mintues with Raoul watching the whole thing-Then they hear a crowd of people singing "WHERE IS THE PHANTOM OF THE

OPERA?"-

Erik: What the hell? They are singing it? Weirdoes...

-Raoul cries like a six year old girl that he is-

Christine: Guess we'll have to go, it will look weird that I am in your arms and Raoul is tied up and ready to be panjabbed. I mean seriously they will realy ridicule me about this. Whispers in Erik's ear This Friday, I'll

be down here.

-Erik smiles and goes to untie Raoul. While trying to untie him Raoul effortlessly tries to bite off Erik's finger. Erik slaps him and Raoul faints-

Erik: Just put him back in Box 5 and the cleaning crew will see him. They will probably think he is dead and send him down to chamber five and then I can throw him into my toture chamber and then he can play "The

Torture Chamber of Doom". And then he...-Goes on about what he is going to do with Raoul.-

-Singing get louder. Christine drags Raoul to Erik's extra boat-

Erik: Damn singers. I mean who sings when they are about to kill someone? Must be crazy or something.

-Christine and Raoul row away and Erik sneaks out his secret mirrior and decides to go to Wal-Mart, even though he hates being seen by the public eye. Meg Giry and her crowd are in Erik's hideout/home and look

around-

Meg: What the hell? I thought he was just here, well that is where he took Christine at least. Oh well.

-Meg walks over to Erik's swan bed and sees his mask. She takes it to sell it on Ebay-

Meg: Heh heh heh! falls in an untimely hole with water just above her head

Meg: Oh shit.

The End