There once was the most adorable little boy. His hair was light blond and so fluffy you could eat it as a candycone. Except it wasn't pink. If it had been pink, everybody would have died of cuteness. His eyes were grey and shiny, always shimmering of joy. And his name was Draco Malfoy. Oh, what a beautiful little creature he was, Draco.
When Draco was with his mother, Narcissa, she would make little butterflies fly around Draco's head just to make him smile. See, Draco and his family were magicians. Pure blood. Little Draco was already fascinated by magic and couldn't wait to go to Hogwarts so that he could learn to practice it himself. He especially loved the little butterflies. When he and his mother were on their own, he couldn't be happier - until his dad would enter. Lucius Malfoy. Lucius was the head of the family, and somehow always gloomy. When Lucious entered he would wave his wand to turn the beautiful butterflies into scary bats, and Draco would run crying behind his mother - and then Lucious would laugh. This was his kind of fun. Draco didn't know his father very well because he was never home, but somehow he looked up to him, probably because he was his only fatherly figure, even though he wasn't much of a father at all.
One time, when he was 5, Draco had overheard a conversation between his mother and father.
"You can't keep treating him like this, Lucious, you'll destroy him!" Narcissa said in a high pithced, nervous voice.
"The boy needs to learn" was all Lucious said. After a long pause, Draco could hear his mother crying on the other side of the door. He wanted to go in there and comfort her, but he couldn't - he was too scared of his own father. After a while Lucious sighed:
"I won't let you be alone with him anymore. From now on, I'll take care of his raising."
Draco could hear his footsteps coming closer and tried to run away, but too late - Lucious was already standing in the doorway, Narcissa tripping nervously behind him. He probably realized Draco's attempt to escape, but didn't comment it. All he did was grabbing his hand and pulling him into his office, pushing Narcissa out of the way. As he closed the door, he asked Draco to sit. When the boy just kept standing, confused as he was, Lucious grabbed him and put him in the nearest chair. This was the most contact the two of them had had for years.
"Boy," he started, as he turned his back on him and started walking to his drawer.
"we need to work on you." as he turned around, Draco's teary eyes met his.
"First of all, you need to get with of that" he said, and pointed to Draco's wobbling face. Draco dragged a hand over his eyes to get away the tears. He wanted to make his father proud, and this was the chance.
"Draco, you know what a Malfoy is, right?" he asked, again turning the other way. Draco didn't know what to answer, so he just pointed to himself.
"That's right, Draco, that's you. And me. And your mother." He said, looking out the window.
"But do you know what?" he asked. Draco just shook his head, and Lucius looked somehow disappointed, as if he had expected another answer. Suddenly he turned around, and before Draco realized, he was right in front of him, their eyes only a few inches from each other. He couldn't avoid eye contact any longer.
"I'm going to teach you to be a real Malfoy" Lucius whispered, before he turned away and left Draco alone in the room.
-l-l-l-l-l-
The years went, and Draco was now 8 years old.
The thing about his father raising didn't really work because he was never home, and when he was, Draco was dead scared of him, because somehow, Lucius was always dissapointed in him, never mind what he did, and there's nothing worse than a dissapointed father (especially not when it's Lucius) - but now his mother didn't raise him either, so he was pretty much on his own, but he had gotten used to it during the years.
On his own he could do whatever he wanted. Sometimes he would borrow his moms dresses, which were of course way too big for him, and walk around in them in his room and pretend to have a tea party. He didn't actually have any teddies or dolls to have a tea party with, because Lucius wouldn't allow that by any chance. He wouldn't allow this either - if he knew. But as said, never home. When his mother occationally caught him in the act, she would just laugh and call him the daughter they never had.
When he was wearing the dresses he wasn't Draco, he was Denice. And Denice was another person. Denice was free from responsibilities and parents. Normally Narcissa would let him keep the dress for the rest of the day, but other times, when she was in a bad mood, she required of him to take it off.
But Draco didn't struggle.
He had learned so much from his father that tears didn't help. Then he would just sit on his bed and read yesterday's newspaper, pretending to be a grown up, even though he wasn't very good at reading. His mom was teaching him, but she almost never had the time. None of them ever had time for anything anymore.
A few months ago, Draco had found a very old newspaper - like, 6-7 years old. It was crumbled into a pile in the corner of the fireplace, right out of reach of the fire. He brought it to his room and tried to read it, but all he understood was something about a boy named Harry Potter - who apparently lived. Harry Potter - the boy who lived. Boy, what a title. Draco would give his left arm to be in his shoes - see, he wasn't able to live himself. How fantastic it must be to just live. Draco hid the newspaper under his pillow, hoping for Lucius not to find it - but how could he, when he was never in there. Harry Potter was now the role model for Draco - a lot more than Lucius was. In the night time he usually dreamt of how this boy might look - just imagine; Harry Potter - the boy who lived - what majestic creature such a person must be. The only thing he knew was that he had a lightning scar on his forehead.
But boy, he wanted to meet Harry Potter.
He wanted to meet the boy who lived.
But most of all - he wanted to be the boy who lived.
-l-l-l-l-l-
"Draco! Wake up, you lazy bastard!" Narcissa yelled from downstairs.
Draco had turned 11, which meant he was going to Hogwarts, school of Witchcraft and Wizardry, this year. Actually, today. He jumped out of bed. This was the day he had been waiting for. Finally he was going to learn how to practice magic himself. And he was not going to let Lucius turn his butterflies into bats this time (just thinking his name made it shiver down his spine). He jumped into his favorite sweater and ran down the stairs. He almost bumped into the maid of the house, apologized and continued into the living room in where his heart skipped a beat.
Lucious Malfoy.
Lucious was sitting at the end of the table, glaring at Draco with that usual disappointed look in his eyes. Draco didn't know he was going to be home today.
Shivering with anxiety, he pulled himself together and walked into the room without saying a word. Narcissa placed a plate in front of him, and they ate in silence. He didn't even realize what he was eating, it just kind of transported from the plate into his mouth. But suddenly Lucius cleared his throat.
"So Draco" he said, without looking at him.
"When the sorting hat places you in Slytherin, you must remember tw0 things. First of all, you must keep our pride. This means you're supposed to stay on top of class, especially in potions and Defense of The Dark Arts. This is very important. Also, stay to our rank. You don't have to mingle with halfbloods, just because you pitty for them. And for god's sake, Draco, stay away from mudblods."
Lucius had taught him about the ranks in the wizard world. Purebloods, like the Malfoys, were on top of the system. Next to them came halfbloods, who had half wizard blood in their veins. On the bottom was the mudbloods, who did not have any wizard parents but had been accepted into the wizard world anyway. And even below them, in the basement, were the muggles, who did not possess magic in any way. He had learned this by heart, even though he wasn't sure what to believe himself. He felt like he needed to experience them himself to make what to believe, and till now he had almost never left the house, and when he did he only met purebloods.
"But what if I don't get sorted into Slytherin?" Draco asked, still looking at his plate.
"Don't interrupt me!" Lucius hissed through his teeth, but calmed himself and continued:
"But you will. True Malfoys always end up in Slytherin. And you, my son, are a true Malfoy."
For once Draco thought he could spot a little bit that wasn't all disappointment in his voice. A little bit of pride over him. That was only because Lucius didn't know what Draco did when he was alone. If he did, he would be furious. And nobody wants to see Lucius furious. So let's just keep it at that.
"And secondly" Lucius continued "and this is the most important, Draco, I want you to mark you this - don't communicate with Harry Potter. Not in any way. Do you understand?"
Draco was lost after the words "Harry Potter" and completely stopped listening. Harry Potter. The boy who lived. Harry Potter was coming to Hogwarts with him.
Oh.
My.
God.
Draco was almost in tears from keeping his excitement hidden. His head was spinning so fast he almost thought he would lift from his chair in the living room and fly away through the window.
"DRACO MALFOY, DO YOU UNDERSTAND?" Lucius repeated, and Draco fell down again. He had been so far away from the conversation all he could say was "What?" while he tried to fix his bush of hair.
Lucius sighed and looked away.
"For Christ's sake, Draco, just stay away from the Potter boy, okay?" he was just about to lose it, so Draco decided just to nod and avoid eye contact. Lucius sighed again and stood up from the table.
"Now, Narcissa. Fix his hair. He needs to look presentable when he arrives." He said while walking out the door. Draco's hair had grown long and wild, somewhere right above the shoulders, because that's how he liked it, and therefore his mother almost never cut his hair, and when she did she only took the tips because he kept looking at her with his begging puppy eyes and she couldn't stand it. But this time was different. This time she cut more. And more. He thought she was going to stop at the ears, but she didn't. She continued cutting it until it had a nice, short figure with no stray hairs. It looked perfect. Almost too perfect.
After that he went straight to his room, and as soon as the door closed, the tears slowly fell down his cheek and down on the carpet. He had gotten one last glance of all the hair that his mother had cut off before the maid swept it away. He had spent years growing that out. Every time Lucius was home he asked his mother to cut it, but she only cut it a little bit. He looked at himself in the mirror and couldn't even recognize himself anymore. he looked way too grown up. The only thing he was sure was still Draco was his grey, childish eyes. But even those had already lost a bit of their glow. Or maybe it was just hidden by the tears. He wasn't sure. But he didn't care. All he could think about now was getting his suitcase so that he could get to Hogwarts and meet Harry Potter.
-l-l-l-l-l-
Suddenly, it all went so fast that he didn't even realize it. Suddenly they were out door and on their way to Kings Cross Station. He had been out the other day with his mother to get his books, his wand and his gown. He hadn't even tried it on yet because he thought it was too black for him and that it wouldn't suit him. But of course, he had to wear it when he arrived to Hogwarts. But anyway, everything was packed (he did that days ago because he was so excited to go) and before he knew it they were at platform 9 3/4. Draco was stunned by the amount of people at the station. His mother usually kept him home, so he didn't have much experience with big crowds.
Limp and a bit anxious he followed his parents down the station and he didn't even realize that they stopped, so he bumped right into his mother who just glared at him for a few seconds before looking away again. For a second, he thought he could sense tears in her eyes. But it was probably just imagination, or else it was his own coming in the way. Lucius gave him his suitcase without looking at him when the train arrived, avoiding their hands touching in any way when he took it. Draco turned to his mother, and she gave him a short hug before she turned her bag to him. He would like to think it was to prevent him from seeing her tears, but probably not. He then turned to Lucius, expecting a hug, but he was just standing there, cold as always. Draco was just about to go into the train, disappointed, when Lucius suddenly grabbed his shoulder. He was just about to turn around, expecting his father's open arms and teary eyes, but Lucius leaned forward before he could do anything.
"Don't disappoint me" he whispered in his ear, before he pushed him towards the train.