It was easier when I knew exactly how she felt.
Or I thought I knew how she felt. Those big brown eyes sinking into mine.
Wet,shiny pink lips at my ear, telling me things I've only heard in my dreams.
Things that made my knees want to fall out from under me.
But I never lose my cool.
Ever.
**********************
I know it's hard please try to coax me
Try to elevate me to the level of choice
A scarlet sky, a silver moon is a veil before my eyes
How can she be so in tune
***********************
I couldn't tell my father the real reason I wanted to stay in Smallville. There's something
wrong with a grown man having this obession with a teenager. A young Lolita..with perfect grades,
she does charity work..everything my mother would have wanted for me.
This perfect little thing I can crush under the weight of my body.
**************************
Take me apart
Suck my blood until you stop my heart
You encumber my progression
*****************************
There's something cold and foreign about being connected to a name like..Luthor. Everyone is afarid to talk, to touch, to make
you feel human. There's no...no spark.
No one to reach out and hold your hand. I like to pretend that I don't need that..the touch of a paid lover is enough.Because it mean
no real emotions. I don't even have to know her name. I don't have to know about how she graduated the top of her class,because
she wanted to speak like her mother in front of her class. I don't have to know there's a place missing in her life because her parents
aren't around.
I don't have to know that I have that same exact hole.
*********************************
And then you save me
*********************************
You can't look her directly in the eyes. Even in the dark, when she sits beside me, there's this one moment of silence. Like the
true man that I am, my mind wanders to her, eyes wide and glazed, looking lost, telling me all the things I hear in my dreams. And
I wonder if she meant it. If she would run if I made a move.
Her voice is soft, but scratchy. Doesn't fit the small body, made of bird bones and smooth skin.
"Um..Lex?"
There's a hint of surprise in her voice, she looks at me like maybe she can actually read my mind. That I want to
take her away from everything and make her mine. Kiss behind her ear, caress her stomach, hold her chin in my hand
and finally taste her.
"Is this a bad time?"
I can hide from this. Pretend nothing's there, that I don't feel what I feel, because I am me.Lex Luthor. The cold son of a bitch
who will take familie's economic stability away in the blink of an eye if their son looks at me cross eyed. The same man accused
of doing so many things when I was younger that I will never be able to shake, no matter how hard I try.
I know she'll never look at me like she looks at Clark, or her boyfriend.
Admiration is something I will never see in the eyes of Lana Lang. Admiration for me,that is.
**************************************
I think of all the time we've wasted
I think of all our time apart
Your scathing tongue is not the one
that I need anymore
*************************************
But I will always be there.
Because I can give them, all her friends,the things I could never have asked for, never wanted when I was
their age. I'll be there as long as possible before she realizes why I am there. What I want, for everything
I have done for her, all my sacrifices for everything I ever gave up.
Everything I ever gave up for this immature little crush on Smallville's princess. The one thing I know
I can't have.
Or I thought I knew how she felt. Those big brown eyes sinking into mine.
Wet,shiny pink lips at my ear, telling me things I've only heard in my dreams.
Things that made my knees want to fall out from under me.
But I never lose my cool.
Ever.
**********************
I know it's hard please try to coax me
Try to elevate me to the level of choice
A scarlet sky, a silver moon is a veil before my eyes
How can she be so in tune
***********************
I couldn't tell my father the real reason I wanted to stay in Smallville. There's something
wrong with a grown man having this obession with a teenager. A young Lolita..with perfect grades,
she does charity work..everything my mother would have wanted for me.
This perfect little thing I can crush under the weight of my body.
**************************
Take me apart
Suck my blood until you stop my heart
You encumber my progression
*****************************
There's something cold and foreign about being connected to a name like..Luthor. Everyone is afarid to talk, to touch, to make
you feel human. There's no...no spark.
No one to reach out and hold your hand. I like to pretend that I don't need that..the touch of a paid lover is enough.Because it mean
no real emotions. I don't even have to know her name. I don't have to know about how she graduated the top of her class,because
she wanted to speak like her mother in front of her class. I don't have to know there's a place missing in her life because her parents
aren't around.
I don't have to know that I have that same exact hole.
*********************************
And then you save me
*********************************
You can't look her directly in the eyes. Even in the dark, when she sits beside me, there's this one moment of silence. Like the
true man that I am, my mind wanders to her, eyes wide and glazed, looking lost, telling me all the things I hear in my dreams. And
I wonder if she meant it. If she would run if I made a move.
Her voice is soft, but scratchy. Doesn't fit the small body, made of bird bones and smooth skin.
"Um..Lex?"
There's a hint of surprise in her voice, she looks at me like maybe she can actually read my mind. That I want to
take her away from everything and make her mine. Kiss behind her ear, caress her stomach, hold her chin in my hand
and finally taste her.
"Is this a bad time?"
I can hide from this. Pretend nothing's there, that I don't feel what I feel, because I am me.Lex Luthor. The cold son of a bitch
who will take familie's economic stability away in the blink of an eye if their son looks at me cross eyed. The same man accused
of doing so many things when I was younger that I will never be able to shake, no matter how hard I try.
I know she'll never look at me like she looks at Clark, or her boyfriend.
Admiration is something I will never see in the eyes of Lana Lang. Admiration for me,that is.
**************************************
I think of all the time we've wasted
I think of all our time apart
Your scathing tongue is not the one
that I need anymore
*************************************
But I will always be there.
Because I can give them, all her friends,the things I could never have asked for, never wanted when I was
their age. I'll be there as long as possible before she realizes why I am there. What I want, for everything
I have done for her, all my sacrifices for everything I ever gave up.
Everything I ever gave up for this immature little crush on Smallville's princess. The one thing I know
I can't have.