Disclaimer: I do not own -man, everything belongs to Hoshino Katsura!
I do own: Ciel and Sarah (no worries, they only have a short appearance at the end)
POV: Lenalee's
Summary: Lenalee finds herself in a empty room, wondering where she is and how she ended up there. One-shot!
Empty. The room I was currently in was empty. There was nothing but me and the chair I was sitting on. I didn't know why but the darkness calmed me down. Why was I here? That question didn't cross my mind even once. I was just staring out the window, waiting... Such a foolish thing to do, I didn't even knew for who or what I was waiting. The light that came from the window shined in my face but I kept looking outside. What could've been so important? I felt like I've been here all my life, sitting on the same chair and staring out the same window. Even though I know that couldn't be possible.
Everyone. Are they behind the door that must be somewhere in the darkness? I didn't bother to look. My body wouldn't move and leave my precious chair alone. Why? Even though my friends ment the world to me, why can't I leave? I want to know.
Eyes. I wonder why I can still see. My eyelids feel heavy and my actual eyes feel like they've died a long time ago. Did I cry over something? I felt like that, but couldn't confirm it. Maybe my tears had dried up. How did I manage to stare out of the window all this time?
"Why... I wonder..." I was surprised that when I tried to say something words actually came out. Maybe I hadn't died after all. I wondered if I should be happy or sad about that, since I was all alone. No one will come to this lonely place.
Since I couldn't move anything except my mouth I began to sing a song. A last option maybe? I really am pathetic.
"Corpes are filled with nothing else than blue sand..."
Yes, the her right now was nothing more than a corpse. A sad corpse. One who couldn't do anything. Even if I can speak, my voice wouldn't possibly reach anyone.
"No blood or even tears..."
She couldn't cry anymore, maybe because the feelings she needed weren't here. Sadness or joy were something I couldn't experience anymore. I think that I'm not bleeding either. My body didn't hurt, but I couldn't look to see for sure. My eyes didn't obey my commands after all.
"I'm alive though I'm fading away..."
I will defenitely fade away some day. It might not be soon, but I will. This room couldn't exist forever, nothing could. It probably isn't even part of the real world, I hope.
"I am like a phantom..."
I think I now understand how a phantom feels. Forced to be stuck in a certain place and knowing that no one will be able to save you. You're not part of the world anymore, that's why it can't be helped.
"Hold on to your heart..."
Why did I sing that? Stupid me. Which heart? I couldn't feel it pounding, but did I still kept hope that it was there? Exactly what am I thinking? Someone should punch some sense into me. Even though there was no one here to do that...
"If you can't speak, what will you do?"
I wonder. If I also lost my voice, what would I have done? I wouldn't be singing this song, that's for sure. I might have silently awaited my fate. That might have been for the best.
"What will you hold on to?"
Foolish hopes, probably. If I had nothing to hold on to I would've thought of something foolish. That there was someone in this room with me, that the chair was living, something like that. The human mind can betray you if it wants.
"No rain... no light... in this cruel world..."
I would love to stand in the rain once again. Rain has the mysterious power to wash your fears away. It would be handy at time like this. I had some light though. But it didn't feel like real light. It didn't gave off the warmth light will normally give. That may sound strange, but I defenitely feel that way.
"You may talk big..."
Who? I didn't understand who the you-person in that sentence was. The voice in my head? I couldn't hear it right now. My friends? They weren't here.
"But in fact... it's the requiem that freezes your bones..."
That might be true. Was she losing her will? It felt like someone else was taking over her song, that the song was describing her. Requiem? This? For who was I singing? Am I really dead?
"Give the people's pain to me..."
I accept it, all of it. So that everyone in the real world can live happily. That way I'll have a function and a reason to keep on breathing. Yes, that will be all I ask.
"I'll give up my life for the living dead..."
And with that, the sad song ended. I could no longer continue. Did I really gave up my life for the living dead? The living dead sound like akuma. At this place there aren't any akuma. They won't be able to reach it.
"Lenalee!" Someone is calling me. Suddenly there was a sea of light and I finally was able to blink. That such a simple thing could give me such relief.
I turned around and saw Lavi standing in my room, the chair and me weren't the only ones anymore. Suddenly there was a bed, a closet and some plants. My stuff. This room was my room. But something felt different...
"Lenalee... b-but I'm sure I heard you sing..." Lavi said, standing by my bed. I was still sitting on the chair, but someone was lying in my bed! Who...?
I tried to move once again, and this time I had more luck. I stood up and walked over to Lavi and the other person, wondering who it was since I couldn't see her of his face. My steps were small but I was moving, that was enough. "Lavi...?" I asked, and I saw him looking up.
He shaked his head in confusion and looked back at the other person. At that moment I finally reached the bed.
Impossible.
Me?
That couldn't be! I was standing right here. But... I was also...
"Lenalee... A-Allen came back. You don't have to wait for him anymore... H-he came back..." Lavi held my, or the me that was lying in the bed hand and suddenly started to cry. Why? What happened? I tried to remember but couldn't.
I to put my hand on Lavi's shoulder but it went right through him. "W-wha..." I was a ghost? Did that mean that I really died?!
"T-that can't be... t-this is all a dream! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!" I screamed, but Lavi didn't look up anymore. My voice didn't reach him anymore. A little while after that Allen came barging into the room.
"Lavi! I heard that... Lenalee..." He panted and turned his gaze away when he saw that Lavi was crying. "You're too late Allen... Lenalee... isn't in this world anymore!"
I was shocked, but not half as shocked as Allen. I might have seen it coming, my own death. I just needed someone to confirm it. What hurted me much more was Allen's expression, and at that moment I remembered. "T-that can't be, Lavi... K-Komui said that she's in a coma! She can't be dead!" Even though he was denying it, even Allen must have known better since the tears were streaming down his face.
I fell down and wasn't able to stand up anymore. Why...? I knew again. I was waiting for Allen. Exactly one year ago Allen left to fight the Earl alone without telling anyone. The next day we found a note saying that he will be back soon. I searched... and searched... and searched... but I coudn't find him. Of course, I feared the worst. That's why I locked myself up in my room and sat by the window all day so that when he returned I would be the first to know. I would be the first to tell him: 'welcome home'.
But... I got sick. If it was because I wasn't eating very well or because I fell into despair, I don't know. Either way, I fell into a coma. In that chair by the window, that is. Two days later Lavi dared to come into my room because there was still food standing in front of my door. When he found out he immediately told the others and he, Kanda and Nii-san came to talk to me every day. I couldn't hear everything that they said but it made me feel at ease. I was just lying in my bed, listening...
Until one day everything turned black. Before I knew it I was sitting in that chair, waiting for Allen's return. Even though I somehow had forgotten I was waiting for him. That day was today, the day that I died.
"Allen! Lavi!" I screamed, stretching my hand out. Their sad faces turned to me and they said something I couldn't hear anymore. I was disappearing... Everything turned black again and I was back in my chair. I won't be able to go back anymore, will I?
That was the last time I saw the real world. God didn't even let me see my own funeral. I probably would've been burned, but I wanted to try to support everyone. Even though I was a ghost and they wouldn't notice me, I wanted to tell them lots of things.
I won't be able to do that anymore.
This room will be my home for all eternity. I guess heaven doesn't exist after all, or maybe it's gates just didn't open up for me.
Farewell, everyone.
1032 years later...
"Sarah, hurry up!" A young boy shouted to his little sister. They had been searching for some valuable stuff in the area near their home since lots of interesting things were found there.
The little girl followed him and panted. "C-Ciel, don't run so fast! I believe you already!" Even though she said that she kept on running because Ciel didn't stop either.
After a while Ciel suddenly stopped running causing Sarah to bump into him. "I'm sure it was around here, Sarah..." He said, looking around. There was nothing here, except for some trees. Their grandpa told them there used to be a place called the 'Black Order' here. It stopped existing years ago, but there are lots of books written about it. Their grandpa loved researching about that place so they always listened to his stories. He also said that their ansectors used to live there! It made him proud.
"Ciel, I don't hear any-..." Sarah started, but Ciel gave her the 'be quiet' look. She sighed but did what he said. "There it is again!" Ciel looked around but saw no one. "I-it's really true... I-I'm scared, Ciel!" Sarah whined, implying that they should go back.
He nodded, 'cause he was getting the creeps himself. Sarah grabbed his hand and dragged him along. Ciel looked around once more and saw a figure standing in the empty space, singing a song.
Okay, this is the end!
I hope you don't mind I added Ciel and Sarah, I just randomly made them up. They weren't supossed to be part of the story, but they ended up being my 'future' people, hopefully you guys didn't mind.
I wasn't planning on making this a story, but I ended up doing so. The whole thing about Lenalee just popped in my head and I really wanted her to sing a song. For those who wonder if it's an actual song... yes, it is!
'Lenalee's' song: The ending of Shikabane Hime: Aka episode 04.
I don't know what the name is, but it will probably appear on the Shikabane Hime: Aka OST.
Kun Osaki sings it in the anime and her voiceactor is Mayumi Iizuka.
I really love the song so that's why I used it! I hope this one-shot thingie wasn't too random. :-) Please review!
Love, SakuraChana