AUTHOR'S NOTE: This fic introduces a couple of OC's, that I hope to use as regulars, if I ever do more J&TPC fanfic: Linda Stanley (who is the Cabot twins' cousin) and Jerry Geeter. The "Josie & the Pussycats" characters belong to Archie comics and Hanna-Barbera. Everyone else you encounter belongs to me.
One afternoon, Josie and the Pussycats were auditioning at a night club. They were playing "Roadrunner." Alan, Alex, Alexandra, and Sebastian the cat were with them, as always. The club manager, Mr. Barricks, was watching the girls intently, chomping on a cigar.
"It doesn't look like he digs the music," Alex said.
"Who would?" Alexandra asked. "Personally, I don't blame him."
Once Josie, Valerie, and Melody finished the number, the Mr. Barricks stood up, and paced back and forth for a moment or so.
"So, Mr. Barricks," Alex said, "what do you think?"
"What do I think," Mr. Barricks repeated. "I'll tell you what I think. I think the act needs work."
"What?" Josie shouted.
"Needs work?" Valerie asked.
"Gee, that was one of our best songs, too," Melody said.
"What was so bad about it, Mr. Barricks?" Alan asked.
"It's not necessarily bad," Mr. Barricks said. "It's just that the band . . . . . needs something."
"You're absolutely right," Alexandra said. She got up on stage, and shoved Josie out of her way. "It needs me!"
"Exactly," Mr. Barricks said.
"Huh?!" Alex shouted, incredulously. "You think it needs . . . . . Mr. Barricks, just out of curiosity, did you drink anything before the audition?"
"Hey!" Alexandra shouted, punching her brother in the shoulder, hard.
"What I mean is the group needs another girl," Mr. Barricks said. "A keyboardist."
"A keyboardist?" Alan repeated.
"It would sound a lot better," Mr. Barricks said, as he turned to Alexandra. "Do you play the keyboard, young lady?"
"Of course I do!" Alexandra shouted. "Have you got one around here?"
"There's a piano right over in the corner," Mr. Barricks said.
Alexandra walked over to the piano, and began playing "Chopsticks" on it. Mr. Barricks wasn't very impressed.
"Do you think you could cut out the clowning and play something with the other girls?" he asked.
"You'll be sorry!" Alex warned.
Josie and Valerie took their instruments over to the piano, while Melody stayed where she was with her drums.
"Can you play any of our songs, Alexandra?" Josie asked.
"Of course I can!" Alexandra shouted, somewhat indignantly.
"Let's do 'Roadrunner' again," Valerie said.
"Okay," Josie said. "On the downbeat. A one, and a two . . . ."
The Pussycats launched into "Roadrunner," but this time, it sounded completely awful with Alexandra's piano playing. Alex and Alan cringed. Sebastian let out a howl, and covered his ears with his paws. One thing for sure, Mr. Barricks was even less impressed this time around.
"Hold it! Hold it!" he shouted. "HOLD IT WHEN I HOLLER HOLD IT!"
"I tried to warn you," Alex said, shrugging.
"All right, kids," Mr. Barricks said. "I think you've got something here, but I still say you need a keyboardist. Hire yourself a girl that actually can play a keyboard, and you got a job."
And upon saying that, Mr. Barricks headed for his office, leaving the Pussycats and their friends standing there, looking at each other.
"Where are we going to find a keyboardist?" Josie asked.
"How about Windy Mills?" Melody suggested. "Her brother plays in a band. Maybe she has some musical talent, too."
"No, Windy can only sing," Alex said, shrugging. "She plays as well as Alexandra!"
"Very funny," Alexandra said, glaring at her brother.
"What about Reine Collins?" Valerie suggested. "I think her younger brother is in the same group as Windy's younger brother."
"Are you kidding?" Alex asked, giving Valerie a look. "Reine Collins can't carry a tune in a bucket!"
"Iris Jacobs was in the school orchestra," Josie said.
"But she played the clarinet," Alan said. "Not piano."
"Looks like you girls are out of a job," Alexandra said.
"Not necessarily," Alex said. "We'll just run an ad in the paper, and hold auditions."
"Good idea," Alan said. "There's got to be at least one girl in town who's willing to join Josie and the Pussycats."
The next day, the Pussycats' ad appeared in the local paper:
Wanted: female keyboardist. Apply Cabot Estate.
"You could've made it a little more descriptive, Alex," Valerie said.
"We're on a tight budget, Valerie," Alex said, shrugging. "My father doesn't give handouts to up and coming musical groups."
"Besides, Val, it looks like it's doing it's job," Melody said, looking out the window.
"Yeah, here come a bunch of girls up the walk now," Josie said.
"Okay, gang, to the music room!" Alex shouted.
Throughout the entire day, the group listened to girls audition for keyboardist. They found most could only play classical music on the piano. Then there were those who could play well, but couldn't sing. Two or three others balked when they found out what the Pussycat costumes looked like. One girl who applied thought that Alex was looking for a typist, thinking he meant a computer keyboard. All in all, they didn't find one girl who could fill the position.
"I've had it," Alex said. "You'd think there'd be one girl out there who'd be willing to join the band!"
"Too bad," Josie said. "I think adding a keyboardist was a pretty good idea, too."
"Maybe we can teach Alexandra to play better," Melody said. "I'm sure she needs a little practice."
"Melody, it would take years for my sister to learn to sing and play," Alex said. "And Mr. Barricks wants a band for this Saturday. You girls are good, but you're not miracle workers!"
"Ha, ha, ha, brother dear," Alexandra said, sarcastically.
"Well, looks like you girls lose the gig," Alan said. "Mr. Barricks won't hire us unless we have a keyboardist."
"Hey, wait, I just had an idea," Alex said, snapping his fingers. "I think I know where we can get a girl who's a good singer, and can play a keyboard. Of course, you girls will have to be a bit open minded about it . . . . ."
"How open minded?" Valerie asked.
"My kid cousin, Linda Stanley," Alex said. "She's sixteen, two years younger than us. I'll give her a ring, and ask her to come over."
"Oh no!" Alexandra shouted. "Not cousin Linda! That shrinking violet? You've got to be kidding, brother!"
"What's wrong with Linda?" Alex asked. "She's a sweet kid!"
"Sweet kid, sure," Alexandra said. "But she's gangly, she's gawky, she's got acne, she wears glasses, she's got braces, and she doesn't have a figure!"
"I admit, she's no Miss America," Alex said, "but she did take piano lessons for six years. Besides, I don't know where else we're going to get a keyboard player."
"That's true," Valerie said. "We are desparate. Call her up, Alex."
While Alex went to the phone, Alexandra went to find a photo album. She returned to the group shortly with a picture, and handed it to Josie. It was a photo of a girl with stringy brown hair, thick black glasses, a mouthful of metal braces, and a face full of zits. She was wearing an olive green cardigan sweater over a white blouse, a gray pleated skirt, white knee socks, and black Mary Janes.
"Here's what you'll be getting," Alexandra said.
"Wow," Josie said. "That's your cousin Linda, huh?"
"Gee . . . ." Melody said.
"We might be desparate, but I'm not sure we're this desparate," Valerie said.
"Linda said she'll be over here tomorrow," Alex said. "What are you guys looking at?"
"This, brother dear," Alexandra said. "Linda's picture."
"Don't we have one that's more recent?" Alex asked. "You know this one was taken four years ago. She was only twelve in this photo! As a matter of fact, I don't think we've even seen Linda since then. Maybe she's changed."
"Not from all this," Alexandra said.
"I guess we'll have to wait and see tomorrow," Valerie said, shrugging. And with that, the others left. Alexandra looked at the picture of her cousin, turned to Sebastian, and smirked.
"Heh," she said. "There's no way the girls are ever going to let cousin Linda in the band! She's so skinny, the coustume's bound to fit her like a tent! Not to mention her face, with that acne, and those glasses, and those braces, and that hair . . . . . one look at her, and they'll be begging me to be in the band! And they're so desparate for a keyboardist, they'll be willing to let me join up under my conditions!"
Sebastian sat there and snickered. Alexandra was on one of her ego trips again. She thought for sure that this time, she'd be the star of the act.