A Little Vision of the Start and the End, an attack on titan/進撃の巨人 fanfic

A Little Vision of the Start and the End

Summary: The cycle began when Hope was born in the hearts of man, desperate to survive. Deity AU

Disclaimer: I don't own Attack on Titan.

If you can't figure out who's who, I put a list in the author's note at the bottom!

Hope is the thing with feathers

That perches in the soul,

And sings the tune without the words,

And never stops at all

-Emily Dickinson.

When the world was born the Gods took clay in their hands.

Amusing themselves with figurines and sometimes they would breathe life into them.

just to watch them crawl around,

crusted brown, skin fire-burnished.

Mankind was no different.

(Not yet)

Toys they were,

in the hands of the Gods,

the greedy children

refusing to share.

All but one

because, you see,

Kindness wasn't among them,

but Intelligence was.

Curiosity and Intelligence go hand in hand,

so it wasn't long before

Intelligence began to wonder:

what if.

What if

their puppets were capable of thought?

What if

they possessed free will?

What if

they cut their strings,

let them go

and watched the chaos unfold?

And as Intelligence thought it happened.

(They were terrible with answers untold)

The world became hell.

Their figurines tortured, deformed,

in agony, and the smell of sulfur

as their bodies burned

under the sun.

Their own minds

cooking them alive.

(Evolution does not come

without a price.

No exceptions)

Eyes wide in fascination,

the Gods watched.

Among them was Intelligence

(or was it Madness?

It was so hard to discern

who was on the surface

when both personalities

toed the line so happily)

Evolution had done its culling,

and the onslaught died down.

Those formed well enough

(to live, because what else could one?)

had adapted to having

free will and capability of thought

(A curse and gift, indeed).

Though it was not divided evenly,

as even then, life was not fair.

The not-figurines were a sight to see:

some found their way to procreation,

doubling their numbers.

Others didn't

(They died quickly)

These creatures devoured

all the land had to offer

until it was barren, empty

and their stomach a hole.

Hungry,

(Then they devoured each other)

Except for one species:

mankind.

Intelligence's own creation,

finely crafted masterpieces

the other Gods mocked

because their skin was so thin,

their lifeblood so easily spilled,

that their veins were on display,

a target to aim at.

Too soft, too dainty, porcelain creature,

fragile pottery crumbling.

Humanities minds, though,

oh, their minds!

They took to their Goddess' gift

the best!

And by God, they did well.

When the Earth yielded no food,

they cultivated it.

When the other creatures kept killing them,

they build walls to hide behind.

When they were cold,

about to die,

they wove clothing until warmth was theirs.

They had taken

their free will, capability of thought,

And made it more than the sum of its parts:

The ability to create (and

was that not divine?)

And this

is the story

of mankind's first creation.

It happened the night their

conscious existence began.

When humanity was no different

from the others

and cried in anguish,

wailed in grief,

and screamed in anger.

Contorted by evolution

They wanted it to stop

because they somehow knew,

something other than pain

existed.

And that was why it happened.

Hope was born in the hearts of man

and perched in their souls.

He was a small thing,

nothing but a babe,

but still, the first creation.

Over time, humanity grew,

but lost just as many.

''Help us,'' they prayed to the Gods above,

''I beg of you, help us!''

And Hope grew and

grew and

grew

until he was so large he could reach up and

clutch at heaven's edges.

With a mighty heave, he pulled himself up,

straight into the midst of the divine pantheon.

(In his veins, humanity's plea burned)

Having lost speech along the way,

humanity's anger, fear, helplessness,

having fuelled his body,

he roared at the Gods.

(Because those emotions, mind you,

have no need for speech,

not even when one is standing

in the court of the Gods)

Hope towered over them.

The Gods were frightened and

shook on their holy thrones,

staring up at the monster

humanity created.

Madness (they were definitely not Intelligence today)

was clapping in their hands,

jumping up and down

right in front of Hope.

Startled by the strange noise,

Hope bend over,

eventually kneeled,

in order to see them better.

His head, over four times the size of Madness themselves,

neared.

Madness eyes sparkled in utter delight,

ignoring the Gods,

who were trying to drag them to safety

(By their brown locks, if they had to)

''Oh, darling,'' they exclaimed, '"Show me your teeth!''

(Self-preservation was something they forgot often,

like breakfast, sleep, and mortality, for example)

Hope snapped at them instead,

not possessing any other means

to convey his discomfort.

(And discomfort it was-

They were almost perching on his nose!)

And with that, it was done-

The Gods gave up on Madness

(Called them a lost cause) and simply

chained Hope

to the floor of the heavens.b

(Like a beast, cattle

That did not know its place)

They were lucky the chains were magical,

because Hope was starting to shrink and

not before long, he was a boy seemingly

no more than fifteen years of age,

as Hope is young

(in most cases)

But what to do with a monster,

whether a boy or not?

He sat in the middle of their court,

he certainly couldn't stay there!

''We must kill him!'' some cried,

but Justice wouldn't let them.

He spread his arms and

stood in front of the boy.

''But what if he kills us?''

the Gods held their plea,

''Surely, he'll go after Prosperity and Wealth first!

And then, what will be left?

Only Hope, I tell you,

only Hope will be left!''

Justice did not budge.

Once all of them had screamed their Godly voices hoarse,

Madness cackled and proclaimed:

''Let Strength accompany Hope

for all of his days.

Is he not executioner of Gods?

The one we deities rely on?''

The Gods tittered

and agreed that

Madness must be Intelligence again,

for it was the best idea yet.

So Strength strode forward,

lifted Hope's chin and

looked him in the eye,

saw rage and desperation,

impossibility and a pinch insanity,

what one needed to keep Strength.

And he decided: The brat might be worth it.

(He still kicked Hope while he was down,

as Strength did have a reputation)

Now you must know,

though Gods are powerful

and the marble halls of heaven are sacred,

the Gods squabbled, felt emotions

(so, so deeply)

Heaven was just as Earth,

the only difference was

that they'd caught most evil in a box

divinely wrought.

(Shush, it's a secret)

But the thing about boxes is:

they're meant to be opened.

If it should stay closed, after all,

it would have been a coffin.

So the angry children reasoned.

There they stood, the three of them,

Lanky, who suited his unfortunate name,

like all Gods named for their domain.

Lionheart, the Courageous,

whose eagle eyes were mesmerized

by the forbidden box-

A challenge (the only one)

she had not braved yet.

(She was so tired of being bored)

And the third, Duty,

who believed he had responsibilities,

among which uncovering secrets

was not the least.

And like all angry little children,

all teens unsupervised,

they went their way, did not look back,

and smashed the lock without a thought.

And God, disaster did escape.

Lionheart slammed the lid on just in time,

for one thing did not escape.

Cold comfort, it may be,

to know only one calamity was still chained

when all the others roamed free,

crying havoc, these dogs of war.

But still, this catastrophe, in particular,

was the worst of all.

The absence of Hope

was the only horror not released

by Duty, Lanky, and Lionheart.

(They would be grateful for it later)

Once released,

the hunted were the Gods,

after millennia of watching

humanity be prey.

(Mankind would be predators one day,

Hope was certain)

And their desperation was so large

(Ichor oozing out of festering wounds,

sin leeching their might,

crime lascivious bleaching their bones.

Their true avarice finally unwound

and nude, for the world to see)

they turned to the only monster in heaven

that would listen:

Hope.

(The one we turn to in our time of need,

when all our options have run out.

If nothing else is left,

then still, Hope will be there.

The only one left)

And he grew and

grew and

grew

until he was large enough to wage war

in the name of the Gods,

with Strength at his side.

(Who followed Hope for all of his days,

even if he did have

the time of his life

making shitty poop jokes.

So when stuck on the toilet,

don't pray to Strength,

don't try to force it out.

It won't work, you won't have the power-

Strength is too busy

snickering at your constipation)

Hope was born out of a plea to the Gods,

a plea to stop the monsters.

The Gods, whom could not even slay

their own night terrors, let alone humanity's.

(but then, who can?)

They could run,

they could hide,

but that? That wasn't living.

And if the divine had forsaken even their own lives-

Then let Hope be the one to fight.

(Hope was born in the heart of the desperate,

and there is little the desperate won't do to survive.

Hope is vicious, determined,

he'll kill them all if that's what it takes)

And Strength?

Strength understood.

Because he was flesh and blood wrapped around

a skeleton of steel.

Strength was not needed where there was no task

where there was no work to be done,

Strength, psychical or mental, was not there without a cause.

Not ever.

He was not unbreakable,

his mortality his greatest victory,

and yet his greatest vice.

Strength wanes with time,

so love him while you still can.

(And Hope, oh, short-lived Hope,

he took that advice to heart)

And he whispered:

''We may die tomorrow,

so let's live today.

Please, give me tonight to hold you,

rest in my arms, my love.

Sleep and dream and be with me,

it's the place where I belong:

My hand in yours.''

And Strength snorted and said to him:

''Really, brat?

Romance it is?

Is this how you're gonna be?

Shut your trap and hold me tight,

I'll borrow your warmth 'till first daylight.''

And into Hope's arms, he burrowed.

(A blush dusted Hope's cheeks,

and he smiled so tenderly

and Goddamn it all,

Strength loved him)

And so they fought the monsters,

entwined they were not.

But still, from Strength draws Hope and

from Hope draws Strength.

Equality is vital to any bond.

And if there were kisses in the night,

a smile meant only for the other,

then it must be clear what it was.

At least, it is to me.

Vicious vulnerability

was never so sticky sweet

as their body warmth joint together,
one heartbeat of four feet.

(They needed it, for ere daybreak came,

pieces of them were ripped away,

into scarlet pools dripping slowly,

sluggishly off the walls)

(Heaven was tarnished forever)

They butchered the monsters and

screamed in the night.

Gods wrecked all around

by their own evil, terror-bound.

But Hope and Strength carried on and

killed and killed (and died and died

cried and cried, because

mental death does count,

as the battle-worn admit)

Clutching each other until it hurt,

that's how they made it through,

because hurt it may, but at least

it chased the nightmares away.

(As long as they kept their eyes open)

And finally, finally,

the last monster was slain.

They fell into one another's arms and

wailed of happiness and pain

(In private, mind you,

Strength was never the same,

but his case of resting bitch face

never went away-

In public, that was)

And they laughed and loved,

for such a short time,

because before the sun went down

a Divine Conclave was called.

The Gods gathered in their court,

or what was left of it,

looked down upon their bodies,

mangled, twisted and injured

and promptly threw a fit.

(Around them their comrades lay,

but none spoke of them,

their ghosts haunting the room,

as if their breast still rose-

But no lungs took breath,

their eyes forever closed,

as is the case with corpses)

Gods are terribly fond of throwing tantrums

over the little things, you know,

so they won't have to think

of the big why and how.

And so, seeking distraction,

the first of them roared:

''Who unlocked the box?

Who was it, you maggots?!

Who took the lid and threw it off

and liberated evil?!

Tell me now, and you shall be spared.

But the guilty? The guilty, I'll string up

for all the world to see.

I'll turn their insides inside out,

let the larvae have their meal!

And when their bodies have been eaten

by those insects small,

I'll slit their throats and hang them all

for death four times over!''

Shuddering and shivering

and quaking in their shoes,

Duty and Lanky were spotted quickly

and dragged before the court.

It was not long before Lionheart joined them,

because even of death she wasn't afraid

(Though she wanted to live,

it was a far harder challenge

then death would ever be.

And she'd like her friends to live.

Lanky might be quickly flustered,

and Duty a stick-in-the-mud,

but she'd gotten used to them

and cared for them a lot.

It'd be a shame if they got the hangman's halter)

And so they stood, facing judgment.

''You opened the box?''

''Yes, we did, we were curious,

curious and angry

at the entire world.

And we wanted more, wanted a challenge,

wanted to know what you hid from us.

In all of heaven, we are the youngest,

but for the babe Youth is.

We're sick and done with your exclusion,

your you're too young's,

your coddling.

We are ready to be adults,

let us be children no more!''

And in the face of that,

the Gods shook their weapons,

at what, after all this time,

were petulant children still.

Though, one should admit,

to speak up took skill and

showcased maturity.

And just as Justice spoke of this,

the blood drained from his face,

as they didn't turn their heads to look at him,

while he mentioned a verdict.

Sadly for Justice, there is little room

for him in revenge and anarchy,

where fists are raised, tomatoes thrown and

worship is order's desolation.

A religion with no need for law-

Or better said, a lack of all,

all but rage and chaos.

So Justice was bound,

his hands tied

as he was spat upon.

And the other Gods jeered at him:

''You should've thought better of letting them

destroy the lock, you beggar!''

And tired Justice just looked at them

with exhausted eyes.

''That's not how it works, you fools,

I cannot prevent crime.

I exist to punish it,

only after the fact

may I know of it.

So fly, you fools,

and run, run,

before your time runs out.

Because I am Justice,

I take no revenge,

but once I am free the law will reign,

and God, what you do is crime.''

(Intelligence, restrained, cried for her friend,

Madness foaming at the mouth)

The trial went on

(Though I suppose it didn't,

since Justice took no part in it.

Which meant it wasn't a trial at all;

Just a bunch of furious people

doing stupid things)

''What do you have to say to defend yourself,

trio of slimy worms?

Adulthood is nice and all,

but the point is moot.

Fess up, before I skewer you!''

Lionheart's eyes narrowed.

''I closed the box,

gave you your salvation

by trapping the last evil,

the evil stuck forever.''

A God on the front row raised his eyebrow,

''What evil might that be?''

And Lanky, the precious child, stuttered:

''The absence of Hope, of course!''

Calamity ensued.

''The only thing left in the box

is the absence of Hope?!''

The outrage was incredible.

''He must have conspired, must be guilty,

of the same crime

as Duty, Lanky, and Lionheart!''

(the poor, angry children,

so disaster-ridden).

And called for their execution.

A mob moved to the sleeping quarters

and yanked Hope out of bed.

Then they told Strenght,

just waking up,:

''Execute this man!''

He laughed in their faces.

(Really, what would you have done,

when woken up by a battalion

of red-faced, spluttering baboons

who dangled your lover in the air?

(Bedhead, pant-less and debonair)

You love, who yawned and acted like

this was nothing new.

(He knew there was a reason he'd kept the brat,

besides his love, of course)

The executioner of Gods

was not about to kill his lover,

thank you very much.

(He'd like a slice out of those fuckers

for even suggesting it)

But the moment he'd said so,

Prosperity shut his shackles

around Strength's arms.

''Nevermore you shall embrace

that ghastly lover of yours!''

And however Strength struggled,

he could not break the chains.

(Prosperity had been corrupted-

His wealth used for his own gains

now avarice was no longer shut away

and buried in the box)

Seeing his lover struggle

and the approaching threat,

Hope roared, desperate,

but time was gone, it was too late-

The only ones who needed him

were the ones accused.

(Death would be his fate)

Three children, plus his lover, and of course

his friends

were not nearly enough,

against the flood of Gods.

He grew so little

that he shrunk and

a heart broke in two.

(The odds

weren't good)

The hauled them into the court,

before the Conclave, facing the judges

who wouldn't do Justice at all.

(He was a solitary man, you see)

And on the dais,

they forced Hope

to his knees,

so the crowd would be able to see,

as Hope had become tiny,

hardly larger than a child.

(He'd begun to lose himself)

''Here be Hope the treacherous!

Standing before you for treason!

False, Hope is, a dreadful monster!

An abomination, the pest!''

(They wanted to call him two-faced too,

but only Intelligence and Madness could

lay claim to that particular title)

None of it was true,

but what could they do?

Justice had been felled,

Strength had been chained and

Hope was located

on the chopping block.

''Off with his head!

Off with his head!

Off with his head and

smash his neck

'till nothing remains!''

the mob screamed, furious,

just as they had done before when

Duty, Lanky, and Lionheart,

had been beheaded too.

In front of the platform

they placed Strength,

bound, unable to reach

his love before his end.

And made him watch,

like it was a spectacle,

a feast, a celebration,

instead of decapitation,

as the axe went down.

Strength roared as he witnessed

the light leave blue-green eyes,

the head reeling

quite literally.

It rolled off the platform,

falling straight into Strength's lap.

His roars became louder than the heavens,

the Gods deaf in one go.

His love, his Hope, his will to live,

gone, all in one blow.

And Strength was mortal,

with age, he waned.

And these screams turned him into

an elderly man indeed.

(From a broken heart,

he died)

And now you must know,

the heavens did not raise themselves.

Strength did not carry the world on his shoulders,

no, his burden were the heavens,

the heaviest thing in the universe,

as the name implies.

But they had killed Hope,

They had killed Duty,

They had killed Lanky

and brave Lionheart.

And nothing, nothing,

prevented Strength

from losing his life

and letting the heavens

fall,

fall

down.

Strength follows Hope

In life and death both.

The heavens plunged down

and shattered on the Earth.

Marble scattering, stones flattening,

white was everywhere.

And the Gods?

They woke up

fine, unharmed,

but for one thing:

Their divinity had been taken.

Evil crawling too far in their veins

made them human,

flaws and all.

Mortal, not Gods, for once and for all.

't was a bitter pill to swallow

The box heavens high, the box divine,

the box that held all evil (once)

had fallen down along with them,

but had not shattered, had not broken.

The lid still shut, the lock still turned.

It lay between the former Gods,

in their new dwelling place.

This particular skeleton

should not be in the closet,

as it was far too dangersome

with that one evil left inside, so

this time, they put the box in a grave,

for it to never be opened again.

They turned around and walked away,

scrubbing the dirt from their nails.

(Though they would never be divinely clean again)

They took a breath

and lived.

(Like all creatures do,

in the end)

The box was forgotten,

only there in dreams.

The knowledge of its whereabouts

lost among the rubble.

And the marble?

It lay there for such a long time

that a mortal may call it eternity.

But it wasn't,

because one day,

humanity built walls.

Walls, white walls,

using the remains of heaven

to hide behind as they had done

in the ancient days none remembered.

Of monsters, Earth was never rid,

human, God, or otherwise.

Good and Evil are potent as hell,

and bloody stubborn too.

(But Earth was the most tenacious)

The world went on

and mankind flourished,

until that faithful day

when they had to

retreat behind the walls.

And they told stories of Gods,

rumor of Heaven,

tales of Strength and Hope.

And if one asked:

''But the box,

the only evil left!

Was it not the absence of Hope?

Then how can he be dead?''

No one knew the answer,

but for the Earth herself.

And if one listened to her,

she might kiss and tell.

Because she, kin of Strength,

(She his roots, or he hers,

that was never clear,

but one tree,

well, my dear,

their faces were alike

and attitudes too,

besides)

loved nothing more than talking of

her dearest savior.

For every death, Hope was born again,

young and spry as ever.

Doomed to die,

but never gone,

his ending a beginning.

A new life to unfold.

And millennia later,

a little boy named

Eren said

to his mother

before bed:

''Tell me the story of Hope again!

Please, mama, please!'''

And she did-

Until the time was nearing

for Hope to meet

Strength again.

(As always Hope was born

in the heart of the desperate)

And somehow, he always ended up

meeting Strength in court,

though its meaning

changed with time.

(Did it, in truth?)

And in the night,

when no one listened,

they stood there hand in hand.

And Strength whispered

to the stars

in eyes green and blue:

''We are mortal

so we shall die,

however divine we may be.

But I am Strength and you are Hope,

and you are together with me.

So hold me tight

and I'll carry the world

some more.

Love me dearly for all the days

I, or you, have left. ''

And Hope said: ''I wouldn't want it,

if it wasn't you and me.

I'll hold you tight, tonight.

Return to my arms forever,

no matter how much we part.''

But this is the thing about life:

It may not give us what we want,

or even what we need,

but it gives us legs,

it gives us bones,

a body and a brain.

So walk and think and live, my dear,

and love before it's too late.

(Isn't living wonderful?)

And Hope told Strength

Earth had left

her divine body.

The last Goddess forsaking

her grand divinity.

(Her soul was pure, though

she knew evil plenty.

She had never been Holy

like the others in that aspect)

The Titans were tearing her apart

and she had to guard humanity,

her smallest inhabitants.

The favorites,

though, God, they could scream.

(They need so much attention,

and she needed warriors

to help babysit

those little ankle biters)

Justice was there,

Madness too (or was it Intelligence?)

And somewhere along the way,

Strength spit in Prosperity's face,

just like he'd always wanted.

All by all, they were quite happy.

Living and dreaming,

hurting and screaming,

but always, always,

alive.

A new goal,

a new day.

Love and friends

to see new horizons with.

(Humanity would not die

as long Hope was alive)

And the cycle started anew,

a snake biting its own tail.

A circle:

Endless.

Author's note

I snuck in a reference to a fic I'm currently writing, though it's KHR, not SNK (it was the part about stars in eyes green and blue ;P). I loved writing this! (I cannot resist deity AU's. This is the fourth one I've published, but I have FIVE more on my computer. And only two of them are in the same fandom OAO How I did that, I'll never know)

I'm very grateful to my lovely friend I.W.P-chan (who writes hilarious KHR and YOI fics, check her out if you like humor!), who read this while I was writing this and told me which parts she liked the best and answered any questions I asked about the readability and such. She rescued quite a few lines!

I was inspired to write in a poetry-like style by OperaEagle IcelynLacelett's KHR character study fic Sonder (on ff net). It's breathtakingly beautiful and heartbreaking and warming at the same time!

The title is from the song ''Breath of Life'' by Florence and the Machine.

I hope you enjoyed it! And constructive criticism is always welcome!

A list of the Gods (in order of debut in the fic):

Intelligence/Madness = Hange

Hope = Eren

Justice = Erwin

Strength = Levi

Prosperity = Nile Dok

Lanky = Bertolt

Lionheart = Annie

Duty = Reiner

Earth = Mikasa