Hi this is my fourth fan fic, but my first comedy please read and review =)
Cullenary School
"Jazzy please be good, for me?" Alice pleaded to Jasper "I will." Jasper promised
I can not believe Alice, the stupid little pixie, got us all into a cooking class. She bought us a whole school!
Guess who is the teacher? Carlisle!!!!!
HE IS A VAMPIRE AND HE HAS NOT COOKED SINCE THE 1200'S!!!!! "WHY DO WE NEED TO LEARN TO COOK!?!?!?!?!" I shouted to Alice
"Because it will be fun Edward!" She assured me. Stupid, dumb, evil, little pixie.
Jasper calmed me down I swear if he had not had that power I would have ripped that pixie into dust.
"Chill man, Alice is making ALL of us do this, including Bella." Emmett said his arm around Rose, who was whispering something in his ear. Then, they both giggled. I did not even want to try to look at what they were thinking.
I got into my Volvo, Bella sitting next to me, and drove to the school. At 190 mph. Cullen speed.
Later in the kitchen
"Okay students today we will be learning the basic ways to cut veggies, meats, and fruits." Carlisle said in his teacher voice.
He handed everyone a chef's knife and I saw in Jasper's head that he would fight Emmett with it.
This is a bad idea.
Bella, being the klutz that she already is, already slipped on the floor in the hall. I so wish I could see her thoughts.
Carlisle gave each of us a carrot, and then he said, "First chop the end off so the green thingy comes off." He sounded so professional
Bella almost chopped off her finger and red blood oozed out of it. In a flash I had Jasper in my grasp who was not even trying to get to Bella and Emmett jumped hoping he would catch Jasper, but just made a gigantic hole in the floor.
"Um guys I have more self control than that," He chuckled "We do not want a replay of what happened on Bella's eighteenth birthday, now do we?" Jasper said in a calm voice as Carlisle was attending to Bella's finger.
Looks like Carlisle was the only one breathing.
"Looks like someone needs some stitches." Carlisle said his medical instincts kicking in. Bella groaned then passed out.
A few hours later……
"Bella, honey wake up." I told her
"W-what happened?" She asked
"You sliced your finger open and then passed out at the smell of blood you got 3 stitches in your finger, Carlisle did it when you were knocked out." I smoothly told her
"Oh okay." She said, her voice was shaken, not stirred. (A.N ROFL i just had to put that in)
I knew this was a bad idea. Alice would pay.
Thanks for reading and i give credit to suckerforavampire (The awsome beta for this story *cyber hugs to you* and awsome BFF) for the title and like at least half of this awsome story. So please review!!!!!
=)
Have an awsome daw filled with awsomeness