Authors note: Wow okay! I found this little beauty in my folders from a while back and it was unfinished so I decided to touch it up a little bit and post it to just see how I felt about it, Also how you guys, the readers, feel about it. I might continue….. you tell me. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I don't own Homestuck it belongs to Andrew Hussie, this is made purely for my enjoyment and yours.
He was drowning. He couldn't take the pain anymore, he had already lost it once who says it won't happen again. The insanity was taking over, he needed a way out. Now. Gamzee jumped up from his position on the floor, running over to a desk and pulling out his little friend. He had already gone too fucking insane to care how he had made friends with a razor. It had started out as a curiosity but grown like a grub, latching onto its lusus like a leech.
MOTHERFUCKING PATHETIC
There it was again, the voice that started all of this. Gamzee knew it wasn't a stranger, it was himself of course. The dark, evil, part inside of him. Gamzee placed the razor to his wrist now marred with little scars from previous 'experiments' he liked to call them. That inner voice just scoffed at him, and Gamzee felt himself slide the blade. It wasn't a large cut as to be noticeable but it was bleeding a lot, more than usual.
Look atthat MOTHERFUCKER, YOU NICKED THE WICKED VIEN, what a MIRACLE.
Gamzee dropped the purple covered blade on the ground as he gripped his hair with a startling amount of force and he screamed loudly, "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" his voice resonated around his hive as he threw himself at the ground slamming his head viciously on the hard floor. The voice only got louder and the clown boy crawled into fetal position. He needed the voice to go away, it was corrupting him….his sanity was like a fleeting thing these days. Purple blood smeared across his face now as he tried to cover his ears but the blood slid swiftly down his wrist, never ending. He began to sob uncontrollably, the voice just got louder and louder.
You are nothing, MOTHERFUCKING NOTHING BITCH get your head OUT OF YOUR ASS AND ACCEPT THE FUCKING FACT, let me take the MOHERFUCK over BROTHER AND YOU CAN BE free
Gamzee stopped as the voice became oddly silent, this was the first time it asked. Why was it giving him a choice, that made no sense, the state Gamzee was in was making him think that this was the right path. He reached his hand out as if he was looking for someone to grasp onto, he was going to give in. His hand stopped short as a knock resonated through his hive. He stopped and stood, the high blooded troll looked down to find himself dirty with his own blood, the bleeding had stopped which was good but he couldn't let anyone see him like this. He ran over to the door with two easy strides with his long legs and called out, "Who the motherfuck is it?" His voice cracked and it sounded as if he had been crying and he swore again but not in his friendly manner. The voice on the other end hesitated, "WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK IT IS YOU LITTLE SHIT STAIN?" The voice was rough and loud and Gamzee instantly recognized:
OH LOOK IT IS OUR MOTHERFUCKING KARBRO, SHOULD I SAY HI FOR YOU?
Gamzee shuddered before calling out, "Whatcha need brother?" The man on the other side sighed unhappily before responding, "JUST OPEN THE DOOR, I NEED TO TALK TO YOUR STONED ASS." Gamzee stood stark still as his heart race sped up, oh no, Karkat will find out. Gamzee looked around quickly before calling out, "One motherfucking second brother, I am, uh about to hop in my motherfucking rain machine." Gamzee took off his shirt and threw it in a corner before grabbing a towel he had lying around and putting it on his arm as if he was just holding it. The blood on the face could be explained but not on his arm, he took a deep breath and put his stoned face on and smiled dumbly before he opened the door, leaning against the frame. A smaller boy pushed past Gamzee before looking around the clowns messy hive, "WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN DOING, IT'S A FUCKING MESS YOU MESSY FUCKTARD." Gamzee just shrugged and closed the door behind him, "A brothers got to live how he motherfucking wants to Kar." He moved quickly towards a small room trying to avoid Karkats eyes sight, if he could escape and clean himself up he would be home free, but, an arm grabbed his arm and tugged. "GAMZEE, WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU BLED TO DEATH ON YOUR FACE." Gamzee just smiled innocently and easily shrugged the man off before going in the bathroom and saying, "I am going to take a rain shower my brother, you can wait over there unless you wanna see a motherfuckers miracle parts?" Karkat groaned in disgust before crossing his arms and stomping away over to what looked to be the hive owner's favorite spot to sit considering nothing was covering the area.
As the bathroom door closed with a soft bang Karkat took a minute to actually look around. The place was scary, clubs and empty soper pie pans sat around and half drunk and some empty crushed bottles of Gamzee's favored 'wicked elixir' had been carelessly thrown on the floor in a pile as if the troll had attempted to clean but stopped for some reason. The unicycle he had once heard about in one of the many soper induced conversations Gamzee had with Karkat, lay forgotten against the wall. Karkat oticed a small puddle of what looked to be blood and walked over to it, ad noticed a small razor centered in the middle of the small puddle. It was covered in the blood he knew to be Gamzee and his eyes widened as he looked over towards the bathroom door ten down to the razor. Kakat reached out with shaky hands and picked it up carefully, afraid he might get cut and walked over to the bathroom door and knocked softly on it, "HEY GAMZEE, WE NEED TO TALK I THINK, HURRY THE FUCK UP." His voice was softer than usual but still remained angry and loud, what would he say to Gamzee?
Ending Note: Okay so you R & R please and I will see if I should continue this. Thank you!
Ja Ne
Lady Dark Demoness
