Chapter 1
The coaches will arrive soon. They'll pull up and once again my mask must go back on, to pretend I hate him. Act like I don't care, like I don't love him. But this is the last year. The last year that he'll be here. Soon he'll be gone and I can just forget what might have been. God, I have to stop thinking about him. It's driving me crazy. Knowing I can never have him. Never hold him close, chase his fears away.
I shake my head, trying to remove every thought about him before the students arrive. Try to turn back into the horrible professor that the students have come to expect. I know my colleagues are always surprised with the sudden change in me at the start of each year after I've spent the summer being the real me, that they've known for years. I've only had this act since he came here. At first it was to make sure I didn't behave any different with him than the rest. But since last September when he moved into the sixth year, it's been mainly to hide the feelings that I now have for him.
As I walk into the Great Hall I see that all of the teachers, bar Minerva are sitting at the high table. Potter's girlfriend, Chang, and Remus are the only additions. As I move to my seat I glare at Chang, she left last year and is now taking over from Madame Hooch as Flying teacher and referee for quidditch matches. She looks over at me and smirks, as she alone knows what I feel for him. I shoot her one of my infamous death glares but to no avail, the smirk never leaves her face.
Suddenly, the doors are flung open and the student body rushes in to claim their seats. Behind the general throng I can see Minerva's tall hat, above all of the heads leading a very scared group of 11 year olds. I pity them, remembering all to well my first time at this school. They stand in a huddled, close-knit group looking around sheepishly. A few glance up at the teacher's table, most flinch when they see me. I see they've been told on the train, I sigh. Yet another year of students that will hate me. You would have thought I'd be used to it now.
The sorting begins but as usual I pay no attention. I'm trying as always to keep myself from staring, watching, wanting him. I look slowly round the hall, there's Draco at the head of the Slytherin table. He's looking at me, trying to be seductive. He's been trying to get me in his bed for a year now with no success and it's really getting annoying. I try to ignore Draco and instead, concentrate on the food that has appeared.
"Hey, Harry. I think there's something wrong with Snape."
Harry looked up in surprise.
"What do you mean, Ron?"
"Well look at him. He's glaring at the Slytherins….wait a second, he's glaring at Malfoy!"
Harry laughed.
"Maybe he's finally realised that Malfoy was one of the Death Eaters that stood with Voldemort in his final stand."
Ron shivered.
"Please don't say THAT name. You know I don't like it."
"Oh come on, Ron." Hermione scolded. "He's gone for good. There's no need to be afraid of his name, he's DEAD!"
"I know. But it's kind of in built into me. I mean all my life he's had this terrible name that no one can even say without looking over their shoulder. Then Harry comes along and at 16, manages to defeat him. It's a lot to get used to in just a year."
Harry looked at his food.
"It wasn't just me you know. I had all the Aurors with me. Not to mention Dumbledore and Snape." Too late, he realised his mistake.
"Snape? What did he have to do with it? Thought you said it was just Dumbledore?"
"I…well…it was. Snape just…lent me a bit of magic."
"Oh," Ron said, satisfied and continued to eat. Hermione looked at Harry, over her glasses in a very Mcgonagall esque way with a look that clearly said, 'I'll talk to you later!'
After all the food had been eaten and people were just talking, Professor Dumbledore stood up and motioned for silence. He got it, but two first years realised too late and carried on their conversation.
"He's gay!" Every head in the hall turned to face the young Ravenclaw who turned bright red and looked at his shoes. Dumbledore smiled.
"Why no I'm not. Do I seem to be?" A few people laughed.
"Well as I was going to say, I hope you all enjoyed the first feast of the year. Prefects," he nodded his head in recognition of them all, "if you would please lead your first years to the dormitories. Could the head boy and girl please stay behind? Thank you."
There was a loud chatter as people got up to go back to their respective houses. Harry hung back.
"What's up Harry? Only the head boy and girl have to stay behind."
"Um, yeah. Ron, I meant to tell you earlier." He reached into his pocket and drew out a shiny badge, an H clearly visible.
"You're Head Boy? Why didn't you tell me? When were you going to tell me?!"
"Ron, I…"
"Just forget it." Ron turned and left. Hermione patted my arm.
"He'll come round just give him time. You know he's still pissed off that he didn't get the prefect position in our 5th year."
"Yeah, I know. Go after him, he'll only get worked up."
She smiled.
"I'm sure I can think of a few ways to take his mind off of it." I laugh as she leaves. She's different from the same swotty know-it-all she used to be and I have to admit it's a welcome change. Her and Ron have only been together since last Christmas but she's so laid back know it's hard to remember how she used to be.
Harry walked slowly to the teacher's table behind the Head-girl, Hannah Abbott.
Professor Dumbledore smiled at them.
"Well, congratulations to the two of you! As Head-boy and girl you will be expected to show an example to the rest of the year and also patrol the corridors, 2 nights a week. You will each be moved to your own tower, away from the rest of the school. Professors Snape and Mcgonagal will show you there and explain the various uses of the tower. Oh…and one last thing, you will both be in charge of organising the Christmas ball. Enjoy." And with that, the Headmaster got up and left for his own tower.
I glared at him as he leaves. I'm sure that somehow he knows about my feelings towards Harry and is somehow torturing me on a daily basis. Last year it was to give him extra lessons in the evenings for Potions now this.
I turn on my heel and sweep out of the hall with Harry, trying his hardest to keep up. I hear Minerva tut as I go past. She still believes I hate the boy, OH how wrong she is…
Harry jogged along the corridor trying his hardest to keep up with Snape. In front of them was a plain wall with a small painting of a young boy, about 15. Suddenly, Snape stopped abruptly, Harry crashed into him sending them both to floor, unfortunately landing on top of Snape in the process. Harry looked up and found he was looking into the most beautiful pair of gray eyes he had ever seen. Snape shoved him off roughly and brushed his robes down, not helping Harry up in the process.
"This, Potter, is your residence for the next year. Wake up Tom!" he yelled at the sleeping boy in the painting, who awoke with a start.
"Professor Snape, sorry…I wasn't aware that the school year had started yet." Snape smiled warmly at him.
"Never mind Tom, this is Harry Potter and he's this year's Head-boy."
Tom smiled at Harry.
"Hello, I've heard a lot about you from the Pink Lady. Welcome to your tower." And with that, a whole piece of the wall swung inwards revealing a large room with several doors leading off from it.
Harry walked inside closely followed by Snape. He looked around in amazement. The room was very big and looked very similar to the Gryffindor common room. There was a large fireplace that was burning merrily away, and various armchairs, sofas and pouffles. Snape walked purposely into the centre of the room.
"This is your personal common room; you can see that it has been designed to resemble your previous one. There are 3 doors leading off from it, one to the Quidditch pitch, one to a shared common room that you and Hannah can use between you and the final one is to the Gryffindor common room, the staircase next to them leads up to your bedroom and further up to the top of the tower. The painting outside is of Tom Riddle when he was 16, this means that he has none of the character traits Lord Voldemort had and is actually a very pleasant lad. There is an identical painting of him on the wall behind you." Harry turned and saw the same painting as outside. Tom grinned and waved at him.
"There is no password to this tower as Tom will admit you and only you inside. Your trunk has already been placed in your room.
Snape stopped and looked around at the room, almost smiling.
"It's a very good tower; I used to have it when I was the Head-boy. Well Potter, I'll see you for Potions tomorrow." He turned and strode towards the exit,
"Professor Snape?"
"Yes, Harry?"
"Thank-you."
He smiled and walked out.
Harry stood there, staring in bewilderment. Snape had called him 'Harry!' that was a miracle in itself. In fact, his whole attitude was scary. He shook his head and attempting to forget, starting to explore his new tower.
I walk quickly down the corridor. What on earth was wrong with me? I was acting as though I liked him. Well, I do. But I don't want him to know that! I just had to remember the final stand against Voldemort to know that much. I shake my head vigorously to try and clear him from my mind. It works, but only for about 5 minutes. As I reach my classroom and push open the door he fills my thoughts and I almost don't notice the person leaning languidly against the door to my private chambers.
I sigh.
"Malfoy, what do you want?"
He laughs his deep laugh that he thinks is amazingly seductive.
"Why professor I'm hurt. I could only be here for one thing."
I close my eyes for a moment and try to figure out how to deal with this. I learnt a long time ago that Draco just needed someone to hold him close, to be with him, and for some reason he'd chosen me. God only knows why.
"Draco, listen to me. I. Am. Not. Interested. Do you understand? It's not going to happen. Just get out of here before I'm forced to start to deducting points from Slytherin." I know that cruelty isn't always the best option but I have to make him realise. He looks at me, the hurt plain to see in his eyes. I can't stand this for much longer; Lucius had made me promise to keep Draco safe just before Voldemort killed him. That day still haunts me. No one had any notion that the Dark Lord was controlling him under the imperious curse until he finally managed to break free for one precious second to distract him long enough for the aurors to get into position. The attack didn't kill him but was a large dent in his ego. As soon as Lucius was killed Draco blacked out in the middle of the 1st Quidditch match of his 6th year and was severely injured from the fall to the ground. He was unconscious for 3 weeks.
Draco just continues to stare at me with that look in his eyes. A tear threatens to fall from the corner of his eye but he dashes it away. He turns and runs out of the room. I sigh, half relief, half sorrow. But then, He's got to feel pain at some point. I walk the few metres to the door to my room and murmuring the password walk inside. I take off my robes and as they fall to the floor, I fall into bed.
Harry sank into one of the many squashy, beanie things that were in his common room. He'd made a thorough exploration of his new quarters. They were unbelievable. The main room had, on the wall opposite the door, a large window that looked out onto the Quidditch pitch, with a glass door next to it leading out onto a large balcony. To the right of the door was the large fire that was currently warming the room. On the wall to the right of the door was a large bookcase that stretched the length of the wall. It was full of various magic books, but also some wizard and strangely muggle fiction as well. And opposite that wall were the three doors leading off to various parts of the castle and the staircase. Figuring that Hermione and Ron would probably be busy doing, erm, things, he decided to go to bed and talk to them in morning. Slowly he got up and made his way to his room.