So I think some of you may be angry or frustrated by my lack of updating my other stories, but the truth is that the season 12 completely killed my inspiration and spirit ... I hope to finish the remaining stories, but I can't promise when, I'm sorry people.
Note: Read it all to find out more
We Still Got It
Arizona sat quietly next to her wife while watching American Bake Off, Sofia was peacefully sleeping in Callie's arms, after the episode finished, Callie took the baby girl to her own bed and met Arizona in the Main bedroom.
Each woman took her turn in the bathroom in the bedtime ritual, when they both got into the bed there was a respectable distance among each women before roll over their side and turn the back to one other.
"You know I love you, right?" Arizona asked quietly in the dark room. It had been three days from that night when the blonde's insecurities surfaced.
"Uh-ha ... that's why you offered me an open-Marriage, right?" And there was the answer with a resentful tone from her wife that she got.
THREE NIGHTS AGO
Arizona fell on her back breathing heavily, her body still trembled as pleasure went through her body and aftershocks of her orgasm shook her languid body. She slowly opened her eyes to find the smiling face of her wife equally satisfied.
But nevertheless…
Callie started kissing her again and she instinctively responded to her care, Callie's hands were everywhere and when the tanned hand reached her underbelly, Arizona stopped her.
"I'm tired, Calliope." She said softly on her wife's swollen lips. "That really took a lot from me."
"Oh." It was the short answer she got, Callie gave her a short smile and rolled over next to the blonde before hugging her from behind and kissed her bare shoulder. "It's Okay." She tried to reassure.
But only Arizona could hear the disappointment in her voice. She bit her lower lip and wondered how did they got here. Before the plane crash, she and her wife had a very active sex life, sex was never a difficulty for them, then she lost her leg, went mad for months at her wife and when eventually they became intimate again, she apparently couldn't keep up with her wife.
She felt guilty and incapable. She knew how active her wife was, she knew how much her wife had waited to be with her and now she couldn't please her at full capacity. Callie was used to nights of passion that would end late in the morning and now Arizona ... she just didn't have the same energy as before. Her leg took that too with it.
Arizona sighed heavily and tightened her grip in the hand her wife had wrapped around her bare waist. "You know ..." She closed her eyes before start talking again. She knew the consequences of the next words would come out of her mouth. "We could have an open-marriage ... if you want." She squeezed her eyes when she felt Callie's body stiffen against her back.
"What?" Callie gasped as she leaned on her elbow to look at Arizona's face. "I'm sorry, what?" She looked confused and a little offended at the proposal.
Arizona lay on her back and took her right hand to caress the beautiful face of the brunette. She sadly tried to smile at her. "I know I don't - I know that I'm not giving you what you need, Calliope -"
"Arizona -" Callie tried to interrupt.
"Just let me finish, please."
"This is absurd -" She tried to protest again.
"Please." Arizona asked gently and Callie finally granted. "I love you, Callie and I want you to be happy."
"And I want those things for you too." Callie said.
"But I'm not the same person that I was before." Arizona smiled at the comment of her wife but she chose to ignore it. "I want you to have fun and go out, I don't want you in this apartment forever just because I can't go dancing or take a walk from time to time just because my damn leg absorbs all my energy." She paused to lift Callie's chin. "Above everything I want you happy, Callie. I can't keep the pace at which you're going anymore, I can't do the positions anymore. I'm just not enough for you anymore." Actually she always wondered if she ever was.
"You are enough, Arizona, you are." Callie tried desperately to make her understand. "Where is this coming from all of a sudden?" She was shocked at her wife's ideas. "I don't want anyone else, I want you." She said gently kissing her wife's cheek.
"I know you love me, Calliope, is why I am proposing to you an open-marriage and no a separation ..."
"And that's why you ask me to cheat on you with other people? Arizona do you have any idea how ridiculous that sounds?" She was starting to get angry.
"You wouldn't be cheating on me, because I would know from the beginning, I could help you pick her or him, as you prefer."
"I prefer you, Arizona." Callie physically pulled away from the blonde, now clearly angry with the proposition.
"Callie, you think I want to share you with someone else?" Arizona turned to her wife. "Of course not. But I don't want to see you unhappy or dissatisfied with the rest of your life."
Callie stared in disbelief. "You're aware that I love you for something more than just sex, do you?"
"I know, but it's a big part of our relationship, Callie." She reached for her wife's hand, but Callie pulled away from her touch.
The brunette shook her head angrily. "You know what? I don't want to talk about this anymore, it's just stupid, so I'm just going to sleep and wait for tomorrow morning that the little pieces of that head of yours fall back into places again." She turned her back to her wife.
Arizona sighed again. "Could you at least think about it?" She asked hopefully.
Callie frowned. "No."
That was three nights ago and since then the couple had been tense and irritable around the other, mostly Callie, but it was starting to get on Arizona's nerves too.
"Callie, you know to even ask that was as hard for me as it is for you to hear." Arizona mumbled from the side of her bed.
"Of course." Callie scoffed.
Arizona turned around to her wife angrily. "I just want you to be happy, I just want you to have everything and more, do you really think I want to see you with someone else? Do you really think it doesn't hurt me see your disappointment face when my body can't give you what you want? Your -"
In the last part, Callie finally snapped. "You know what? ALL RIGHT. If you want me to be out there screwing everyone who passes by in front of me, then that's what I'll do. You win! You want an open-marriage, then that's what you'll get!" Callie took a long breath as she watched her wife with eyes wide open. "Now can we go to sleep, because I have an early morning surgery and apparently I have to find someone who I can fuck with."
"Callie -" Arizona wrinkled her nose in the last words of her wife.
"I said that you win, Arizona, so let's sleep now, please." Callie didn't wait for an answer and turned away from the blonde and pretend to be asleep. If that was what Arizona wanted, then Callie would ensure that it was what the blonde got.
ONE MONTH LATER
Callie finished applying lipstick in front of the bathroom mirror, she looked in the mirror and smiled at her reflection. She looked good.
The brunette walked into the living room of the apartment to find her wife watching a children's movie with a sleepily Sofia in her lap. Arizona looked up and her jaw almost touches the ground to see her gorgeous wife.
"So ..." Callie trailed off. "I'll try to be home before midnight, I don't know how this is gonna go." She said as she took the keys and coat.
"Who is this person again?" Arizona swallowed hard in her own question.
"Umm her name is Mellissa and she is a civil lawyer, we're going out for a few drinks and see what happens." She smiled sweetly at her wife. "Don't wait up." She kissed her daughter's forehead before kissing her wife's cheek and then leaving the apartment.
Leaving Arizona with a bitter feeling.
One month. A month had passed after Callie was angrily agreed to Arizona to have an open-marriage, one month since the blonde had seen her wife going out on sporadic dates with strangers, but Callie always came home with discouragement and saying it wasn't worth it. In the background the blonde expected the pattern was maintained.
But that was not what happened eventually.
After that date with Mellissa, Callie kept seeing the woman, Callie even introduced the woman to Arizona one day.
Someone knocked on the door and naturally Arizona went to answer. "Umm who are you?" She pursed her eyes when she saw the green - eyed dirty blonde in front of her.
The woman smiled happily. "You must be the wife." She said directly.
"Oh hey! You're early." Callie came behind Arizona grinning at the other woman.
"Well I had some time off and wanted to come and pick you up for our date, I hope that's okay." The woman said coyly. Arizona frowned, both women seemed to have forgotten she was even there.
So she cleared her throat. Callie was the first to react. "Oh right, sorry, Mellissa, this is my wife Arizona and this is Mellissa, honey." Callie introduced the two women.
Mellissa sat on the red sofa in the living room looking at the two year old girl playing while Arizona followed her wife to the master bedroom. "You didn't tell me anything about a "date" with Mellissa tonight." Arizona crossed arms. "I thought tonight it would be you and me only."
"Oh yeah, sorry, I should have forgotten." Callie looked for the last time in the mirror. "I'll go now, but I promise I'll make it up to you, see you tomorrow." Callie said as she kissed her wife on the lips.
"Wait, tomorrow?" This was a whole new level, they hadn't talked about sleepovers.
"It's just in case you're asleep by the time I get home, that's all." Callie shrugged and left the room and before Arizona knew it, her wife and her ... girlfriend? Lover? Special friend? ... Left the apartment.
The days turned into weeks and soon Callie spent more time with Mellissa than at home with Arizona and that began to bother the blonde.
"And what did you expect, Arizona? You practically pushed her into the arms of a stranger." Teddy's voice was heard through the computer.
"You're not helping, Teddy." The blonde complained as she drank her white wine.
"I'm not here to help, I'm here to tell you how stupid you are to even propose such a thing to your wife, what were you thinking, Arizona?" Teddy chided her best friend a little more. She was in Germany in a renowned military hospital, but always had the opportunity to be in contact with the blonde.
Arizona looked embarrassed at her glass of wine. "I just wanted her to be happy and I clearly was not giving everything she needed. I'm not enough for her anymore."
"You're an idiot, Arizona." Teddy was not afraid to tell the truth. "My husband is dead and you want to share to the woman you love with other people?"
"I just suggested her to find someone to fool around, not to find my replacement." The blonde objected plaintively.
"And look at how's that going."
"I feel that she's going to leave me." Arizona looked at her friend across the screen. "And what if that woman Mellissa - what if she falls in love with Mellissa and decide not to stay married to a defective and incomplete woman like me?
"You're not –" Teddy tried to stop the irrational thought of her friend but Arizona was in a roll.
"What if she decides to go with Mellissa and take Sofia with her?" She asked more and more concerned with every hypothetical case that crossed her head. "What if she leaves me?" She finally asked with a watery look.
Teddy sighed. "There is only one way to find out, Arizona." She paused to look at the face of her friend. "You have to ask her."
Days passed by and Arizona haven't yet dared to ask her wife what their future plans was. Meanwhile Callie continued to have dates with Mellissa. They would go to the theater, they went to the movies, to dance, to dinner at nice restaurants, they amused each time. Arizona knew it by the fragrant smile that her wife had every night - the smile she only saw when she couldn't sleep thinking about what Callie might be doing - or in the morning when Callie woke up. She missed that smile on her wife features, but mostly she wanted to be who placed that smile on the full lips, not some other random woman.
Kisses between them were scarce, caresses almost didn't happen, Callie rarely held her while sleeping – when they slept in the same bed -. And the minimum intimacy they shared before all this was practically nonexistent now… So Arizona decided to try to recover what was left of their marriage.
Arizona walked towards her wife who was signing some papers at the nurses ' station on the Orthopedics floor. She leaned over and gently kissed her cheek. "Hi." She said in a whisper.
Callie was surprised for a moment before smiling sideways. "Hey, what was that?" She couldn't help asking.
"I can't kiss my wife on the cheek?" Arizona asked squinting.
Callie continued signing more papers, but her body was slightly leaned to Arizona. "Sure you can, it's just you hadn't done it for some time now." The brunette said.
"Well I think I'm going to start doing it more often then." Arizona felt emboldened taking her wife's chin and closed the short gap between their lips in a short but deep kiss. She couldn't help but smile when she heard the faint sigh of satisfaction coming out of her wife's mouth. "Umm what time you finish your shift?" She asked gently pulling away from the kiss.
Callie stared at her wife's lips before looking at the playful blue eyes. "Six, why? You need me to take Sofia early?"
"Nope, I was thinking that maybe you and I could - uh -. Have the night to ourselves." The blonde asked biting her lower lip.
Callie's eyes widened and gave her an apologetic look. "Oh honey, I'm sorry, but I already have plans with Mellissa tonight."
The ease with which Callie spoke almost took the blonde out of her mind, but she tried not to make a world of it. "Umm can you cancel? I mean you already spend enough time with her, so I think it's only fair if -"
"Arizona is distasteful to cancel plans that you already have with someone else." Callie returned to her paperwork.
"Umm Callie?" She caught the attention of her wife. "I am your wife, you remember that, right?" She asked with disdain.
"Of course I remember, Arizona, but I already made plans with Mellissa, I can't just cancel everything with her." Callie didn't dare to look at her wife in the eye.
"But you can say no to me?" Arizona frowned, she leaned her head trying to look in her wife's eyes but this would not make eye contact with her. She sighed heavily and shook her head in disbelief, she could feel her eyes fill with tears quickly. "Fine, whatever." She started to walk away when Callie took her hand.
"I'll make it up to you, I promise." The brunette said weakly.
"Yeah, right." She pulled away from the grip of her wife before fleeing the scene.
Arizona couldn't believe that her wife had rejected her to go out with Mellissa, like she was the wife and Mellissa was just the other woman ... Except that she now felt like the other woman who has to beg for a little quality time with her lover.
She didn't like it. She didn't like at all.
But she wasn't allowed to decay. She walked upright and confident once again through the halls of the ortho wing looking for her wife to give her a piece of her mind.
Arizona stopped short in her tracks when she saw said wife leaving an on call room with a big smile on her face, she instinctively smiled at her, until a second woman came out behind the brunette. Arizona's face fell at the scene, the two women parted with a gentle kiss on the cheek taking separate ways, none of them realize the sad blue eyes a few meters away from them.
Enough was enough.
Arizona entered the 502 apartment quietly, she put her coat and keys on the furniture next to the door and went into the bedroom she shared with her wife. She found Callie looking in the mirror her outfit, ready to go. Arizona couldn't help but roll her eyes.
"Hey, where's Sofia?" Callie asked when she saw her wife close the bedroom door and her daughter out of sight.
"She's going to have a sleepover with Zola." Arizona responded weakly. "I programmed it because I thought we had plans tonight." She added angrily.
"Arizona ..." Callie picked up at the voice of the blonde. "I told you -"
"That you clearly prefer to go out and do God knows what with Mellissa than to spend the night with your wife." Arizona finished for her sitting on the edge of the bed.
"You're jealous?" Callie turned to face the blonde. "You do not get to be jealous, Arizona." She pointed out to the woman.
Arizona raised her eyebrows in disbelief. "And why is that? My wife rejects me to go with her lover and I can't get jealous?" She couldn't believe the brunette's words.
"NO! You don't get to make me a scene over this, because it was you who suggested an open-marriage!" Callie replied angrily too.
"Yes, but I never said you'd have to replace me, Callie."
"I'm not replacing you, Arizona." Callie broke eye contact.
"You could have fooled me, Torres." The blonde gave a mocking laugh.
Callie took a deep breath before saying something else. "Look I have to go, I'm running late." She went to the door.
"Are you going to leave me?" Arizona finally broke. A tear slowly went down her cheek as she looked over her shoulder at her wife.
"Arizona -"
"Are you in love with her?" Arizona continued the interrogation. "Is it the leg? Is that it? She's complete and can please your needs? I mean, that was the starting point of all this, is not it? So now are you going to say that while you were screwing her you fell in love with her? Now you can't see the moment in which you can get rid of me completely, so you can be with her? ..." Arizona spill it all out while Callie kept her head down in shame staring at the door. "ANSWER ME!" Arizona finally lost her temper standing to face her wife's back.
"Arizona ... you have to know -"
"Look at my face, Callie." The blonde demanded through clenched teeth. "You're leaving for a better lay? That's why you took her to the hospital today?" She crossed her arms angrily. "You took her to the hospital for a booty call… in my own hospital. I can't believe you've done that to me." The battle was lost with her tears.
"You said it wasn't cheating! You said it was fine!" Callie argued.
"You could keep saying no! You could keep saying you didn't want it, but clearly you needed someone else to scratch that itch for you." Arizona shook her head. "Sex is the only thing you care about, is it not?"
"That was not what she gave me." Callie put a hand to her mouth as a painful sob was released from the depths of her soul.
Arizona looked in confusion at the woman. "She gave me understanding, she gave me peace of mind, with her I felt good again without all the stress and tension and tragedy and all the drama that always came with us." Callie looked at her wife for the first time. "She gave me love and affection and made me feel things ..."
"That I can't make you feel anymore?" It came out as a question, but Arizona already knew the answer.
Callie nodded slowly. "With her all it's easy and fun and no pressure or uncomfortable silences, nothing has to be planned or thought out. All with her happens naturally." Callie sniffed sadly. "In a way it reminds me of you before..."
"But I'm not that person anymore, that's what you're saying?" Arizona felt her heart sink more and more into her chest with every word of her wife. Sadness filled her chest like a painful oppression that wouldn't let her breathe. That's it, this was the end of her great love. "Are you in love with her, Calliope?" She asked in a devastating whisper.
"I have to go." Callie dried her tears and turned to the door again.
"Answer me, please, Callie." She begged for a definitive answer that she knew it would end up breaking her heart.
"I have to go, Arizona." Callie opened the bedroom door and headed for the front door.
"Please, Callie, don't leave." Arizona fell awkwardly on her knees as she leaned on the edge of the bed and tears streaked her aching face. "Please, Callie, don't leave me. I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you ..." She kept saying again and again and once more.
"Callie? Please come back…"
"Callie? Please…"
"Callie?"
"Arizona?"
"Arizona?..."
Arizona opened her eyes slowly as she found the darkness, her hands shaking and her heart beating in her chest tightly. She was frightened and the room was dark ... Why was it so dark?
"Arizona?" She heard her name again now closer to her face, she felt a hand on her chest and instinctively moved away from the contact. "Hey, it's okay. You're okay, it's me, I'm here with you, everything it's okay, Baby." There it was again the sweet voice.
"Callie?" She asked afraid of the answer.
"Yes, my love, it's me, I'm here with you." And as if those were magic words, Arizona broke to mourn fumbling to take the woman in her arms. She held her so tight afraid to let her go again. "What's going on? I'm here honey."
"Don't leave please. Please don't leave me." Arizona repeated again and again as she buried her face in her wife's neck.
"I'm not going anywhere, Arizona. I'm here with you." The brunette assure her wife.
"Please don't go with Mellissa, please, please, please ..." Arizona repeated like a painful mantra.
"Arizona, I won't - wait what? – Who's Mellissa? And why would I go with her, Arizona?" Callie was beyond confused but she kept rubbing soothing circles on the back of her distraught wife as she hugged her.
"Promise me you won't leave."
"Arizona ..." Callie sighed heavily. She didn't agree to make more promises. "Who's Mellissa?" She went on a tangent.
"No one, no one. Just tell me you will never leave and will never accept my proposal for an open-marriage." Arizona rambled through tears.
"Excuse me, what did you just say?" Callie had had enough of this conversation. She approached the bedside table and turn on the lamp. "What are you talking about? Who's Mellissa? And why the hell would I accept an open-marriage?"
"Calliope ..." Arizona looked at the beautiful face of her wife with longing and love.
"No, Arizona, you'd better not even thinking about it, because I swear to God I'll beat you something in that head of yours until you come to your senses." Callie ranted quietly. "There is no way that I can be with someone else and I'm sure as hell I'll kick your ass if you do, you're out of your mind if you think I could -" She was interrupted with hungry lips on hers in a passionate and deep kiss.
Callie moaned in satisfaction when her wife stuck her tongue in her mouth and stroked her inner walls. She in reaction put her body on top her wife in the middle of her legs as their tongues fought for dominance.
When oxygen became a problem, both women pulled away from the kiss with some other pecks. Arizona took the beautiful face of her wife in her hands and smiled happily. "You do not have the foggiest idea how much I love you, Calliope and I am the one who will kick your ass if you fall for someone else other than me." She kissed her hard again.
Callie moaned again in the kiss. "Mmmm that won't happen, Baby, I love you too much for that." She said in the kiss. "I really, really love you so much." She whispered in her wife's lips.
"Good." Arizona murmured as she maneuvered to be on top of Callie. "You want to show me how much you love me?" She raised an eyebrow at the suggestion.
Callie gave her best eating shit smile to her wife. "I thought you'd never ask."
Arizona gave a shriek as Callie put her on her back again, but quickly became loudly groans as Callie sucked her neck and worshiped her body for the rest of the night.
They still got it...
All mistakes are mine