Dean knew that Sam was gonna find out about his little secret at some point. He just didn't know that when he did that Sam would compair it to something like this..
A/N: Obviously, SPOILERS for Season 9.. Do not read past this Author's Note if you wanna avoid SPOILERS..
WARNINGS:.. Mmmm... Mentions of being roofied and implications of Noncon and Dubcon and ... Just.. This idea sacked me out of nowhere.. Okay?.. So.. Yeah.. Please don't flame me.
Okay.. This is set right after Sam finds out about Ezekiel (Which.. NO.. Has NOT happened YET (I stress the YET.).. But, we ALL know that he will, we just don't know WHEN)... This is an idea of how Sam might react after finding out about Ezekiel.
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"Look, you were dying. Okay?"
"That's no excuse.."
"I asked you and you said yes, Sam. You told me that you'd do whatever it took to stay.."
"But, I don't remember that, Dean!"
"Ezekiel had to wipe your memory so you wouldn't eject him.."
"And WHY, would I eject him if I supposedly gave my consent for 'whatever it took' to be done, Dean?!"
"Because.. You didn't exactly know that saying yes meant getting possessed by an angel and we didn't think you'd be too keen on the idea.."
"So, let me get this straight.." Sam growled "I supposedly gave my consent for whatever it took to be done so I could stay, but because you and Ezekiel knew that I wouldn't be happy about finding out what exactly I consented too, you had him wipe my memory of both my saying 'Yes' to this in the first place, but also of him slipping inside me and taking a joyride?... I think I've heard of something like this before!.."
"Sam.."
"Oh, I know.. I've heard it from people who talk about being roofied, Dean!.. They drink something that they don't know is drugged, then someone takes THEM for a type of joyride of their own!.."
"Sam!.."
"And then that bastard can turn around and tell the person that 'Hey.. You said 'Yes.'." and .. Hey.. Maybe they did and just don't remember!"
"That's not.."
"What?!.. NOT, how it happened?!.. If I gave my consent.. Then WHY did he have to erase my memory?.. Huh, Dean?.. Why couldn't you have just told me about everything when I woke up and explained to me about Ezekiel? I mean, yeah.. I might've been a little pissed off at first.. But if I remembered saying that I'd do whatever it took to stay then I would've gotten over it Dean! I wouldn't have just thrown away my life by ejecting Ezekiel, if I'd known that the only way he could heal me was from the inside!.. But.. NO!.. You didn't do that, Dean!.. You let him con you into letting him not only possess my body, but into helping him keep me in the dark about it!"
"I couldn't risk you flipping out and ejecting him. You would have died, Sam!.."
"Right.. So.. Appparently you think I'm either stupid or suicidal..."
"Sam.."
"If I was suicidal, I wouldn't have 'consented' to do 'whatever it took' to stay.. So.. If you had told me.. I wouldn't have ejected the angel."
"You migh've done it without meaning to..."
"And even if I was stupid, I would have still known better than to say.. Draw an angel banishing sigil and accidently send both myself and the angel riding shotgun, to who knows where.. Which.. Oh.. Right.. I almost did do, BECAUSE I DIDN'T know that I had an angel riding shotgun.."
"Sam.."
"So.. I still don't see WHY you thought it was better to keep me in the dark about Ezekiel, unless that's the spin that he put on it and you just followed along, because he told you that he would help keep me alive.. Now, that doesn't remind me of how I blindly fell in with a demon because I thought she could help keep you from getting drug to to Hell.. Nope.. Not in the least.."
"This wasn't the same as that!"
"Oh really?.. Because you knew for a fact that he was one of the good guys?!"
"Cass vouched for him."
Sam barked out a laugh "Cass?!... Cass vouched for him?.. Well, then he must've been on the up and up, cause Castiel's opinion meant so much to you when you were basically willing to give up on him for taking off with the Angel Tablet.. I swear.. One minute you don't trust Cass as far as you can throw him and the next you're letting his opinion sway you into trusting some angel who might not even be who he says he is.. And didn't Ezekiel make you tell Cass that he had to leave?.. Maybe because he isn't really an angel named Ezekiel, but some other angel that maybe Cass wouldn't have vouched for and he couldn't have Cass outing him to you, because he wasn't just in the deal to heal me, but to heal himself as well?!"
"He saved Cass' life, Charlie's life, your life.."
"Yeah.. I wonder how many lives Uriel saved, or Zachariah, or Lucifer.. Cause last I checked they were all angels too and still, despite being angels, despite how many lives they might've saved.. They were proof that not all angels are good, that not even all of the angels who can claim they've saved lives are good.."
Dean didn't know what to say to that..
"And now, whoever he is, whatever his agenda might've been, whatever his agenda, might still be, is out there, he's been inside my head and he knows where this place is." Sam held out his arms as he gestured to the bunker. "So.. I hope you're right Dean. I hope he's really one of the good guys.. I do. But just think about this.. Whose idea was it to lie to me about this whole thing first? Yours, or his?.. How many lies did he make up for you to tell me?.. Then asks yourself.. If he was really a good guy, then why was he perfectly fine with lying? And that.. If he was so willing to help you purposefully deceive me, then how many times did he purposefully deceive you?.. If he was okay with keeping something as big as him practically roofying and raping me.."...
"Hey, that's not.."
"Because he wasn't inside me against my will or anything like that, right?.. Oh wait.. He actually was, because even if I said that I would do 'whatever it took' to stay, BECAUSE, IF, 'whatever it took' turned out to be something that I'd be so against that I would have automatically refused the second I realized what it was I was consenting to.. But Ezekiel fixed that by scrubbing my memory, to keep me from revoking my consent... Now.. Let's go over that again and I'll use words you can understand! He slipped inside me, without my full awareness of what was happening and then he took away my ability to say either yes or no, when he scrubbed my memory, all so that he could stay inside me and take what he wanted, because he was so sure that my answer would be no and he didn't wanna have to deal with having to find some other chump who'd let him slip inside of his comatose sibling.. So, tell me.. How is what he did to me NOT rape?!"
"Look.. I know that he was 'inside of you' .. But it wasn't like that.. There wasn't anything sexual.."
"Right, because rape is all about sex and nothing about some bastard taking control away from their victim.." Sam spat out sarcastically And how do you know there was nothing sexual?.. Huh?.. How do you know that he didn't take over while I was.. I don't know showering or sleeping?.. How do you know that he didn't take advantage and use my own body to molest me while I had no way to defend myself?.. How do you know if the other day when I went for a jog and brought home breakfast that 'Ezekiel' didn't take over and use my body to whore himself out to a group of bikers, how do you know he didn't find some demon somewhere and make me drink every single drop of it's blood so that he could heal faster?.. Worse yet.. If you don't know for sure that 'Ezekiel' didn't do those things.. Then how do I know for sure that he didn't do those things?.. Do you even care that he could have done something to hurt me without either of us knowing about it?"
Damn right Dean cared.. But more than that.. The more what Sam was saying sank in, the more he regretted letting himself fall for Ezekiel's crap so much that he had started to let him spin the lies that he in turn told Sam...
Just what the hell had he been thinking when he let Ezekiel con him into keeping his existence from Sam?
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A/N: Yeah.. I really have no idea where this came from..
