Tears from the Heavens
I sat in the hallowed chapel listening to their sorrows and yet not hearing any of them. Emotions ran wild today and everyone was showing it, except me. I hadn't cried in front of them, in front of anyone. He sat in hospital before this very day begging for our help, begging for us to stay with him – we couldn't. That day, I wasn't strong, I cried and that was the last day anyone saw that of me.
Everyone shared their memories, read their prayers with heavy hearts, and tears. Somehow I couldn't cry, I wanted to but it just isn't me. I stood up when the priest invited me to say the prayers of the faithful. I read them, I sat down. That was it...
His son stood up, read out his memories of when his father used to cook onions on the barbeque and not notice the caterpillars falling in the grill, joining the onions. After that he didn't go on, he let out a sob and ran back to his= seat.
His daughter sat next to me, tears falling to her lap. She crowded he face with damp tissues and watched when she could the beautiful procession before us. Her husband was a lot like me, sitting silently, watching it all – blank. I didn't mind that, it never stuck me before just how strong he was, just how much he put out to help his family, to be strong for all of us.
The priest called to us, say your final goodbyes. Wouldn't go up, if I did I would cry and I wouldn't do that. Not in front of all these people. People came to his coffin, stood for a moment, then returned to their seats. The priest blesses him and sent us on our way.
I stood in a hall with chairs and long tables covered with a white cloth and food for everyone. We shuffled in and sat down. We all chatted weakly, I was approached by many.
"Good job, your reading was beautiful." That's what they all said. I forced a nod and a smiled and left it at that. I sat next to his son and the son's wife. That had a little girl in a pram and I played with her. I truly believed that she was the only happy person here.
I talked with his relatives; some were sour and bitter while some were trying their hand at happiness on such a grim day. They laughed at an inside joke and some introduced their partners to the family members they haven't met before or reacquainted themselves with people they hadn't seen for a while. I found myself doing the same thing, but after a while I had to stick to the corners of the building as i usually did. It's a funny thing; a death can bring together those who wouldn't have seen you under any other circumstance. We decided to leave after an hour.
I stepped out and felt the wind on my naked arms; the mist had turned to rain. I looked up straight to the rain and thought of him. I had to let him go even if I didn't want to. I let my best friend leave me in that sky' it was shedding the tears I was guilty of not shedding. He was crying from the heavens for me. My Grandfather was gone and that's all I knew today.