here's a little oneshot for ya! probably after the third episode of fifth season is when this takes place :D hope you enjoy, and try to forgive me for my terrible work ethics and nonexsistent posting!

For All I'm Worth

Michael was used to being attacked. He kept an arsenal of weapons at the ready, because more than once, he was attacked. To him, the best defense is the best offence. If that means hiding a gun under your pillow, in the fridge, in a cabinet and hidden behind Fi's snow globes, than that was his defense.

So when someone randomly burst into his door at about noon with guns blazing, he did what he felt he should. Jumped and rolled over his bed, dodging poorly aimed shots while he was at it, than scrambling for some decent cover behind the counter.

The shooting stopped and a voice called out, "Gimme all your money!" An obnoxious belch followed the demand. Michael immediately realized this was probably just a drunk from the club in front. What assassin coming for Michael would be stupid enough to come in through the front door and shoot randomly. Michael sighed and shook his head. This just wasn't his day.

Earlier, he had been hanging out with Fiona and Sam at the Carlito. When Fi saw an barely dressed girl who probably couldn't see her toes past her chest and saw Michael looking in her general direction, she left with a huff. He tried to tell her a long time ago those girls didn't interest him. He wasn't kidding. He still found them rather annoying. Especially when they put him in a situation his super spy skills couldn't. Especially when it was a relationship situation, which, thank-you-very-much, he didn't need right now.

So, he stayed down, contemplating what to do. The idiot was smart enough to stay in the doorway, probably to drunk to take a step forward without falling.

When he heard a crash and glass shattering, Michael peered over the countertop, to see what he dreaded.

Fi's snow globe collection… He just broke one of her favorites. Glass, water, and fake snow littered the ground; a broken base sat in the middle of the mess.

Oh, god… Michael thought to himself, I am soooo dead.

Michael took a deep breath and stood, glaring down the sights at his potentially drunk killer. "Stop!" Michael shouted at the man who looked about the equivalent of Sam in hobo form. An ugly Hawaiian shirt was to big on the mans wiry frame, and a ragged gray beard had caught the remnants of some meal that probably took place no less than a week ago. The man stumbled and lloked at him. He was definitely drunk, then.

"For all I am worth," Michael said sharply as the man got incredibly too close to a snow globe he had gotten for Fi in Ireland, "Don't touch those snow globes."

The man cackled, and raised his arm, once again shooting his handgun wildly.

Michael ducked behind the counter again, but not before a bullet took a decent chunk out of his shoulder, and the sound of another snow globe shattering added to the ringing in his ears. The loud report of a shotgun made Michael jump a little.

He stood up again slowly, and was rather gladdened to see Fiona, standing over the drunk with her shotgun full of beanbag rounds. She looked up at Michael thoughtfully.

"I didn't know Sam had a brother," She said with a crooked smile that nearly made Michael's heart stop.

"You could've got here before he managed to clip me." Michael said shrewdly as he pressed a hand against the bleeding wound. It was slight, probably wouldn't need many stitches, if any.

"Yeah well, I was a little busy and…"

Then she noticed her snow globes, and more importantly, the ones that were K.I.A.

"I'll get you new ones Fi." Michael promised promptly when she knelt to the ground to pick up the shattered pieces. Only three had been broken. Had it been more

"I don't want new ones…" She mumbled, picking up the bases and lying them carefully where they belonged. Fi stood up and faced Michael, pouting.

"So." She sighed. "Not only did you manage to get shot by a drunk with no aim, you also let him break three of my treasured snow globes." Fi bandaged his arm a little too roughly, making him wince.

"I'm sorry Fion—."

"You owe me a big shopping spree Michael."

"Okay Fi."

"And you have to come along."

If Sam were here he would make the distinct sound of a whip at him and laugh. "Fine, Fi,"

Fi walked away from their bed, going to wash her hands. "What're we going to do with him?" She asked, motioning with her head to the unconscious drunkard who lay face down halfway in the door.

Michael shrugged and said thoughtfully, "Good question."

*(*)*

hah yes everyone, I am still alive! I'm sorry I haven't really updated for like the past month or so, but writers block sucks more than my freaking vacuum. Yeah, I went there.

Anyways, hopefully I'll update Little Lion Man within the next week or two, so don't think I abandoned it. It's just on the back burner as I woprk on my other fanfic and my original story over on fictionpress.

Hope you enjoyed this lil' oneshot, and I hope even more so that your not all angry with me (though I really deserve it)

Love,

gilraenstar :D