What happens at the end of Pandemonium? Lena's POV.
Disclaimer: I do not own this (well kind of do because I wrote it) but for all, the credit goes to Lauren Oliver…..=DDD
I think I could've fainted.
His eyes lock mine. My vision blurs as tears start to form. He brought back millions of memories. I take my hands back that were wrapped around Julian's waist. He still holds me and I take my hands to his wrists and shove away his grip around me. At first I walk, and then I find myself running. Running, to Alex. First he told me to run into the Wilds away from him, and now I run to him. I stop when we are so close that I could see his individual eye lashes. My eyes search his face, his eyes, that were once sweet and soft, have hardened like stone. I let the tips of my finger trace his new scar. That's when the tears that I held back come streaming out. I pull him close to me and brush my lips against his. We kiss until I'm totally out of breath. When I pull away, his eyes have somewhat softened.
"You're alive" I whisper my voice barely an audible whisper. I wrap my arms around his neck and he wraps his arms to my waist. My chest against his, and our heart one. I'll never lose him again. Not ever will we be separated again. Then Julian coughs ruining my-our moment.
I turn around and he just standing there, staring. I smile through my tears. From the back of my hand I wipe away the tears.
"This," I begin "is Alex. He is the one who gave me deliria. I—I thought he was -dead." I smile heartlessly. I look at Alex and smiling and kiss him again as though we had never even been sparated. I look at Raven as she walks away, I run to her from behind and give an unexpected hug. "How can I thank you?" I whisper into her ear.
I turn around to see to find Tack for once smiling quite beautifully, but not without his usual hardness. As hard as grandpa named him remembering Sarah's words. I smile at him briefly. I open my mouth to speak more but nothing comes out except a sound of hesitation.
Tack nods ending our conversation.
I stand akwardly in the empty space, before not have noticing my big problem.
I look at Julian, then at Alex. Lockong eyes with them both breifly. How could I not possibly notice that in between Alex and Julian I would havr to choose.
But who?
I love them both. I look at Julian and remeber so much that we have been through together. The Tunnles. The homestead. The cell. The hospital. I saved him because I thought I loved him. And i do. I do love him, with all my heart.
But then I look over at Alex and tears well up my eyes. The last moment when he told me to run. I ran for so long because I loved him. And maybe I still do. He gave the deliria. I wouldn' be here right now if he hadn't come in to my life. If Alex really wanted me to be happy when he told go into the Wilds without him, would he still be happy if I decide that I have found another love thats not him? Though the worst is that he lied to me. Lied to me. But for a good reason. To save me.
He saved me in the same way that I saved Julian.
I look at my sneakers then at Alex's eyes which are of caramel. His beauty so irresistable. I feel a pit at the bottom on my stomach telling me I have terribly betrayed him. And I have. A lump grows in my throat threatining to erupt. I swallow.
Julian looks at me with the worlds most clear, blue eyes. HIs beauty as irresistable as Alex's. Though if I choose Alex, won't I feel guilt of hurtimg him? Most of his family is dead and the person who he can truly trust and believe in is me. I would only make matters worse.
Why couldn't I be with them both. No, no, i can't. That means that I'll have to bare watching them both burn in the fire of jealousy. I begin to walk. Beeling to uian and firmly kiss him on his lips barely giving him time to kiss me back.
Then I run to my true love. My soul mate.
Alex.
His eyes brighten just before I wrap my arms around him and kiss him with my fingers firmly masaging his scalp with my fingertips.
He is my world, and I'm am his. Without him, there is no world.
Tears stream out of my closed eyes. I remember this feeling. Like the feeling of floating and swimming and flying all at the same time. With the same person.
I hear something drop.
No. Not something but rather a someone. A body. The name Julian fills my mind.
Have I really chosen the right person. I pull away to see Alex grining into my eyes. He leans his forehead to mine and takes a deep breath.
I touch my nose to his and smile.
"I love you" I whisper.
"But there is a problem" he says.
Confused i frown againts his forehead.
"I love you more," he finally whispers.
I hear hear heavy footsteps behind me but choose to ignore them.
'Well, well, well," I hear a terribly known voice.
"How 'bout it? It seems to mr that Lena has been under our noses quite a while now. Huh?" It was him.
Really him.
Uncle William.