Hello readers- I'm almost done with my two promised I'm Here Now chapters. But this came to me in the middle of the night, and I wrote it down. This is set right before Season 4- about two days TARDIS time before Voyage of the Damned, and a week after Last of the Time Lords. Basically, the Doctor is having doubts about his feelings for parenting Evy, and watches her sleep like he did her mother. When he does, he discovers something he always had hoped was true.
They're so different.
He thinks this to himself as he looks into the darkened room- Evy's room. His daughter's room. Evy sleeps soundly- but she shifts positions and rolls over so many times he wonders how she manages to do it.
She sleeps more than a Time Lord- well, more than him- and less than your average human. He can't be sure if she sleeps more or less than a full Gallifreyan child, because the information to make a comparison just doesn't exist anymore. But she sleeps every night, even if only for a few hours, and for that he is grateful. Just as he was grateful for Rose's need to sleep.
Rose.
She and her daughter- his daughter- look so similar, but act so different. Rose was messy, just the slightest bit lazy, outgoing, and had a tendency to jealousy. Evy was neat- no, organized, easygoing, self-contained for the most part, and, from what he'd noticed, always had to be doing something.
Cautiously, he walked silently into the room and stood by the wall across from her bed. He's not sure if he should be here- but he wants to be here.
The same feeling drew him down here to watch over her as drew him down to watch over his Rose. It's the same feeling he had as he watched Rose sleep from the doorway ten feet down the hall and to the left. The same feeling he had as she slept softly beneath the sheets of his bed after they'd- well.
Entrancement at the beautiful thing he was lucky enough to have with him. The need to protect- to make sure she was safe. And yes- love.
There was the awkward thing. Evy- he had loved her from the moment he had found out she was his- well, after he got over his shock.
How could he not love his child- Rose's child? But there it was. Did he love her? Really? Or was it simply-
A soft cry, followed by a whimper, from the direction of the bed interrupted his thoughts. Evy tossed and turned in a knot of sheets and blankets, long hair strewn across the pillow like an extra shadow, caught in the grip of a nightmare. Instantly, he was reminded of his Rose.
Softly, he moved over to the bed and sat gingerly on the edge of the mattress. Silently, he reached out a hand and stroked the line of her cheek.
"Shhhh." He whispered, letting his fingers brush her temple as he gently extended soothing thoughts into her dreams. It was easy- reflex by now. Almost every other night after the Cybermen and Mickey's leaving, he'd soothed Rose out of one nightmare or another. He caused so many nightmares-
He continued absentmindedly stroking his daughter's cheek as the guilty thoughts began to surface.
Too selfish to keep his love safe… Too blind to see the truth about his daughter… Too helpless to protect those he cared for…
A tendril of thought danced into his consciousness- full of reassurance and the same calm he was giving to Evy. He reached out, to brush the TARDIS away-
And realized the thought came from the girl who still slept beside him. Quickly, he checked to see that he had not awakened her- and found that she was still deep in sleep, immersed in much pleasanter dreams. The thought she had given him had come from her subconscious alone.
More emotions leaked through- trust- and love. The love she had found for him as he had traveled with her unawares.
She sighed in her sleep, and murmured something that made his hearts stop- and melt.
"Dad." Then she sighed again and rolled over, now facing away from him. One arm slid back over her side, unconsciously seeking what her subconscious had already recognized.
The Doctor hesitated a moment before he picked her up to cradle her- his child. She clung closer to him- not like Rose had done, but like a child will seek affection from its parent.
Its parent.
He knew now, that that was true for both of them- they had both accepted it; embraced it.
He would hold her for the rest of the night- put her back under the covers and slip away before she woke. Tomorrow, they would begin the task of trying to find their footing as a family and father and daughter. Tomorrow, they would begin the search for Rose. And the next day, he would try to begin understanding her unique physiology- try to begin teaching her.
But for now, he was content to know that she was his daughter, and he loved her.
So, did y'all like it? Please review, because I keep getting all these ideas for cute Father-daughter moments between Evy and the Doctor- as they try to really become a family. Just 'cause in my mind, Evy didn't love her dad when she first met him. She was intrigued by him, wanted to know him, but didn't love him. When she started traveling with him, she really did start to love him as her family- but she still has trouble picturing him as her dad.
We all know the Doctor's a deeply loving person, so after the Doctor found out, once the Master crisis was over, he would automatically try to leap into that role for Evy, because he would feel like her dad, even if Evy didn't.
So Evy tries to reject that, to go back to what they were before, and the Doctor gets confused. And I have lots of cute little oneshot ideas from when they are trying to figure things out. Some may make it into the future write of Season 4, some will be one shots. Tell me what you think,
Wings