From "Critical Care."
"That's why you're looking for him, isn't it? You want him for yourself."
"I assure you, I have no romantic interest in him whatsoever."
"Why? Not good enough for you?"
"No, it's not that, it's just that …
I already have a man," Janeway half growled as she draped her arm around Tom Paris' shoulders.
Tuvok was stoic, Chakotay in shock. The rest of the bridge crew managed to hold back their laughter as they waited to see just what Tom would do.
He didn't disappoint. The captain had left a couple of inches of space between them, and his hand darted into the opening and snaked around the captain's waist.
But he didn't stop there, and the crew watched, transfixed, as Tom's arm slid down her back … finally coming to rest on their captain's backside.
For Harry, who had the best view of the proceedings, things were much, much worse. To his horror, Tom had pulled the captain's body close … and his hand was splayed over her hip, his fingers resting just below the slight swell of her stomach.
"Tom, you're a dead man," he thought. The captain was already pulling at his ear.
Wait a minute … something didn't look quite right. He looked at the captain's hand again. "Holy mackrel! She's playing with his hair!"
The transmission finally ended, and Janeway rapped the top of Tom's head, all the while giving him a look that clearly said, "What the HELL were you doing?" Tom let go, and gave her his best innocent choirboy smile.
"Mr. Paris!" Tuvok and Chakotay growled simultaneously. Janeway spun around and put up her hand.
"I will handle this, gentlemen, thank you," She took two steps away, then turned back and glared at Tom. "My Ready Room. Now!"
"Yes ma'am," he said as he scrambled out of his chair.
He went in first, and as the doors closed behind the captain, they could hear her yell, "Just what were you thinking?"
They all gulped and went back to their tasks. Tom most certainly was a dead man.
Tom opened his mouth to defend himself, but the captain pointed toward the couch. He sat; she stood next to him, an arm on the couch back, and looked down at him.
"Really, Tom? Playing grab-ass with me on the Bridge?" she growled, though at least it was in a lower tone.
"I didn't grab your … ass," he protested.
"No, actually, it was more personal than that."
He couldn't argue. "We needed to make this look good, didn't we? I mean, would that woman have believed us if I'd just sat there with my hands in my lap?"
"I don't know … you could have just taken my hand."
"You were using it to play with my hair."
Janeway pursed her lips as she realized she was busted. "Oops … I did do that, didn't I."
She sat down next to him. "What am I going to do with you?"
"You've had some pretty good ideas," he said, giving her a wicked grin.
"Well, I think for now, you're going to stay in Sick Bay." He winced and she shrugged. "If I don't, Chakotay's going to throw you out an airlock. We're already down a doctor; I'd prefer not to lose you, too."
She sighed. "Actually, I'm surprised Tuvok didn't have a stroke, poor man."
"I think we're going to have to resuscitate Harry," Tom chuckled. "He probably saw the whole thing."
"You are giving Harry quite the education, aren't you?' She looked at him, and a small smile played on her lips. "And by the way, I am going to find a way to get even with you on our next away mission."
"I look forward to that."
"I bet you do." She returned his wicked grin. "So do I."
He pulled her close. "I'm sorry, Kathryn. I didn't mean to embarrass you. I just wanted to put on a good show for them so we could get the Doc back." He gently kissed the top of her head. "We haven't had much time together. I miss you."
"I miss you, too," she said. "But a little more discretion, please." She sighed again. "There's enough speculation about me and Chakotay. I suspect I'll get some pointed questions when we get back."
He chuckled. "And I'm running a betting pool that no one will ever win. It's a great smokescreen."
"That's another reason to be discreet. You get us caught and you'll have to give back all those credits," she said, nudging him in the ribs for emphasis as he winced again.
"All right, off to Sick Bay with you," she said, punctuating that with a quick, gentle kiss. "Go," she said as she quickly checked him for lipstick and stray hairs. "And please try to look chastened. I'm supposed to be ripping you to shreds."
He headed to the back door. "Stop by Sick Bay later?"
"Yes, but it might be late. Now go!"
She went to the head and gave her uniform a quick brushing, then repaired her lipstick. She grinned as she looked at herself in the mirror.
"You are playing with fire," she told herself. But it was going to be a long, long journey, and Tom's idea of fun was a lot more satisfying than listening to another round of ancient stories.
Just the same, she wondered if she could time her retirement to start the moment Voyager reached the Alpha Quadrant ...