Spying on Sasuke
Naruto: Right we agree Teme is up to something, correct?
Sakura: Yes, but I don't see why we have to sit in a bush and spy on him
Suigetsu: Surely he can sense you chakra?
Naruto: You're giving us away, get down here! *Pulls Suigetsu into the bush*
Suigetsu: Hey! We're enemies here!
Sakura: Aren't you curious of what Sasuke is up to?
Suigetsu: I suppose... okay, I call a temporary truce, until we find out what Sasuke is doing, deal?
Naruto: Deal
Sakura: You're going to need to hide your chakra, or he will find us
Sai: Ugly, Dickless... fish... man? Why are you in a bush hiding from Sasuke?
Naruto: SHUT UP SAI!
Sai: I only asked you a question Dickless
Naruto: If you must know we are spying on Sasuke
Sai: Oh, because he seems to have gone
Naruto: *peeking up from behind the bush* Damn he's right!
Sakura: He's over there by Ino's shop!
Naruto: Is there a bush over there?
Sakura: why must it be a bush?
Sai: Oh, I read something like this; it's called a... fetish! Yes, that's it; Dickless has got a bush fetish!
Naruto: I have not!
Sai: You don't?
Naruto: Why would I have a fetish for a bush?!
Sai: Because you have no dick, so you stick branches up your arse
Naruto: I will kill you
Sakura: I thought we were meant to be spying on Sasuke, not discussing Naruto's fetish for bushes!
Naruto: I don't have a bush fetish!
Sakura: Sure, anyway, there is a bush right outside Ino's shop if we sneak over there Sasuke won't see us!
Naruto, Sakura, Suigetsu and Sai sneaked over to the other bush
Sai: Keep Dickless away from the branches
Naruto: Keep Sai away from me
Sai: Oh, do you want to have intercourse with me now? Look Dickless, just because you don't have a dick doesn't mean you can borrow mine.
Naruto: SA- *Sakura's hand clamped around his mouth*
Suigetsu: Shhh! Do you want to give us away?!
Sakura: Why is Sasuke buying whipped cream?
Sai: I have also read about this, I think they call it... Kinky- *Sakura clamps her hand over his mouth*
Sakura: Please don't damage my brain with images of Sasuke and Kinky whipped cream... *Shudders in disgust*
Sai: I thought you liked Uchiha Ugly?
Sakura: Before he betrayed us.
Naruto: He's on the move again!
Sakura: *Notices something sticking out of the back of Naruto's pants* Uh, Naruto... Why do you have sticks down your pants?
Sai: Told you
Naruto: I have no idea how they got there! I swear!
Ino: Why are you hiding behind a bush, infront of my shop?
Sakura: We're spying on Sasuke!
Ino: Why may I ask?
Naruto: He's up to something, he just brought whipped cream!
Ino: I know, he brought it from me
Suigetsu: Any idea why he brought it?
Ino: He didn't say, sorry
Sai: You're useless, if you must stay get down because Uchiha is coming this way!
Sakura: *Pulls Ino into the bush* Shhhhh!
Ino: *Whispers* What is he doing now?
Naruto: He seems to be staring at some kind of picture...
Suigetsu: Picture of what?
Sai: Whipped cream? Picture? Sasuke is one kinky mother fucker
Karin: Don't say that about my Sasuke!
Suigetsu: Karin! *Pulls her into the bush, with hand clamped around her mouth*
Sasuke looked in the direction of the bush, but shrugged the noise off as an animal or just a crazed fan girl and proceeded to stare at his mysterious picture.
Suigetsu: You almost blew our cover Karin!
Karin: Why are you stalking my Sasuke anyway?!
Inside Suigetsu's head: If I tell her the real reason, she'll go and tell him, gotta think of a good answer... I know!
Suigetsu: Were spying on Sasuke to see whether he loves you or not!
Karin: Really?!
Suigetsu: Y-yes!
Sakura: No we- *Suigetsu throws his hand over sakura's mouth*
Suigetsu: Haha, oh Sakura you're so funny!
Inner Sakura: What is he doing?! We aren't spying on him to see if he loves her?! Wait, Karin is a crazed fan girl, so if we did tell her what was really going on she'd blab to Sasuke, ahhh... I see.
Suigetsu: *Unclamps his hand from Sakura's mouth*
Sakura: Oh yes, obviously that's what we are doing, why else would we be stalking Sasuke?
Karin: Hmm, that is true, okay I will help you!
Sakura and Naruto: Great...*Sarcasm*
Ino: Shh! He's coming this way!
Naruto: Sakura I think that picture, is of you!
Karin: Of course it's not! MY Sasuke-kun wouldn't carry a picture around of anyone but me!
Naruto: Oh yes, my mistake, it is you.
Naruto: *Whisper to Sakura* It's defiantly you!
Sai: Why would Uchiha be carrying a picture of Ugly around?
Karin: Hey! Who you calling Ugly?!
Sai: Sak-
Naruto: *Clamps hand over Sai's mouth* Now, now Sai, it isn't nice to call people ugly!
Suigetsu: What's he doing now?
Ino: It would seem that he is buying some flowers? Oh wait, that's my shop! *Run's from bush, to shop*
Karin: Aww my Sasuke-kun is buying me flowers! How sweet!
Suigetsu: Yes, for you, obviously! *Sarcasm*
Sakura: why would Sasuke be buying flowers?
Naruto: Who knows?
Karin: I do! They're for me! Oh Sasuke-kuuun! *Skips out of the bush toward Sasuke*
Suigetsu: Karin NO!
Sai: Uglier seems to have blown our cover.
Naruto: We don't know that yet, if we move we will blow it even more.
Sai: You'd know about blowing things Naruto.
Naruto: I'm not Gay Sai!
Sai: Oh yes I'm sorry I forgot, you just have a fetish for tree's.
Naruto: I do not have a fetish for tree's!
Sai: What's with all the twigs in your pocket then Dickless?
Naruto: ...They're for a fire later, encase it gets cold!
Sai: Sure they are.
Sakura: Will you two shut up? What is Karin doing?
Karin: *Skips up to Sasuke and says something to him*
Sasuke: *Shake's his head at her*
Naruto: Oh shit.
Karin: *Starts shouting at Sasuke*
Sasuke: *Frowns and says something to her*
Karin: *Points in direction of the bush*
Sasuke: *looks toward the bush, in anger*
Suigetsu: Shit, he's gonna kill us!
Sasuke: *Starts walking toward bush*
Sai: What are we gonna do?
Sasuke: *Getting closer to the bush*
Naruto: Well you aint throwing none of my sticks at him! GET YOUR OWN!
Sasuke: *Getting closer still to the bush*
Sakura: Nobody wants your sticks Naruto!
Sai: No but Sasuke wants you!
Sakura: What?
Sasuke: *Closing in on the bush*
Suigetsu: Great idea Sai! *Push's Sakura out of the bush*
Sakura: *Crashes into Sasuke* Ahh!
Sasuke: Hn *Catches her*
Sakura: Erm, hey Sasuke...
Sasuke: Sakura, why were you spying on me in a bush?
Sakura: I wasn't spying on you
Sasuke: Then why were you in a bush?
Sakura: Can a girl not sit in a bush without being questioned about it?
Sasuke: Not really.
Sakura: Well, then I have nothing else to say to you, good day Uchiha.
Others: *Still watching from the bush, Ino has now joined them and Karin has walked off somewhere in a strop*
Sasuke: *Suddenly pins Sakura to a tree* My name is not Uchiha, Sakura.
Sakura: Let go of me.
Sasuke: *Smirks at her* No.
Sakura: Yes.
Sasuke: Make me.
Sakura Thoughts: What can I do? God he's so hot, so hot I feel like he's melting me! I must get away before I melt!
Sakura: Get off me Uchiha; I have nothing more to say to you.
Sasuke: Why should I? *Buries his head in the crook of her neck*
Sakura Thoughts: Oh no, this can't be happening, not infront of them! But if I reveal them, he'll chidori them to the high heavens! Oh Kami-sama...
Sakura: Because I told you to, I don't like you anymore Sasuke, so get over yourself.
Sasuke: I like em' feisty *Smirks*
Sakura: Back off Uchiha, I won't tell you again.
Sasuke: No, you won't. *Kisses her*
Naruto: Oh god, that is sick, how can he kiss her?!
Sai: In comparison to what you do with your sticks, this is beautiful.
Naruto: Leave me and my sticks out of this.
Sai: So you admit you're intimate with a stick?
Naruto: No!
Suigetsu: Shut up, he's making a move!
Ino: She knows we're here, how could she do this infront of us?!
Naruto: Because she knows Sasuke will kill us if he knows were here.
Ino: Fuck, your right.
Sasuke: *Runs his hand up her thigh*
Sai: I have been meaning to study intercourse for a while now.
Naruto: I don't care if I die; I am not watching my two best friends have sex!
Sai: But you will have sex with a sick?
Naruto: Ye- NO!
Sasuke: *Bulge in his trousers*
Naruto: He's got a boner, oh god, he's got a boner; please someone stop this!
Suigetsu: Sasuke my man! Tonight you lose your virginity! And I get to watch!
Ino: Sasuke's a virgin?! *Laughs*
Suigetsu: Yep!
Sasuke: *Starts undressing Sakura*
Naruto: I can't take much more of this...
Sai: Don't look then Dickless!
Naruto: It's hard not to!
Suigetsu: Oh yeah baby, just a bit more, take her bra off, ohh yeah.
Ino: Pervert!
Sasuke: *Undoing his trousers*
Naruto: Oh god, I can see his cock, oh god.
Sai: Just imagine it's a stick, oh no wait don't do that, you may just get a boner.
Suigetsu: My god... Its... HUGE!
Echo: HUGE... HUGE... huge... Huge...huge... huge
Sasuke: *Sharingan activated, looking angrily toward bush*
Suigetsu: Oh shit... ABANDON BUSH!
Others: *Scatter*
Naruto: *Drops his sticks* My Sticks!
Sasuke: CHIDORI! *Blasts Naruto*
...
...
...
Sai: You really are Dickless now.