"Safe harbours, Isabela..."
With a gasp, Isabela jerked upright.
The dream had felt so real, like she had been there, physically stranded in the fade with Hawke.
Hawke.
Acting of its own accord her had reached out towards the left side of the bed where her lover usually lay, before remembering that that side of the bed was empty.
Hawke.
Images start flooding into her mind as she instead started to finger the red cloth tied around her upper arm.
Hawke falling, death rushing to great her as she plummeted towards the ground, before being halted by some invisible force.
Hawke arguing with that Grey Warden Alistair, her fingers twitching towards her murder knife, her stormy grey eyes reflecting the flashes of green from the fade rift above.
Hawke, slaying demon after demon with Varric and the rest of their companions in their desperate attempt to find their way out of that hell hole. Some demons taking the brutalized shape of her deceased family, tormenting her with the reminder that she had failed them all.
Hawke screaming out in pain as the fear demon lands a lucky blow, cutting her deep along her side, blood dripping down and blending in with her Champion armour.
Hawke sacrificing herself. Electing to stay behind to face the monstrosity standing between them and freedom.
Isabela could hear the way Hawke's heart was pounding against her chest, see her trembling hands tighten their grip around her twin curved blades as she gathered her resolve.
Isabela had screamed at her to run, to not be an idiot. Tried to remind Hawke that she had made Isabela a promise to never die on her, to never leave her. But the Pirate may as well have been shouting at the maker, for all the good it had done, for the Ferelden never seemed to hear her. Nor could she touch her, her hands passing straight through Hawke as she went to drag her away.
So instead she turned and shouted out at Varric, who had disappeared inside the rift. She screamed at him to get hiss ass back and to drag Hawke out of there, to no avail.
Isabela had felt her heart sink into her gut as she watched Hawke run at the demon with that same cold look in her eye she had when she fought the Arishok in single battle.
Hawke had won that day, barely, but this was no Qunari. This was a manifestation of every fear brought to life.
This was certain death.
"Safe harbours, Isabela."
With Hawke's last words still echoing through her head, Isabela reached over the side of the bed and grabbed the half empty bottle of Antivan Brandy from the floor, wiping away the single tear that had fallen with her other hand. She emptied the bottle in two long swallows in an attempt to wash the dream away.
"Makers balls," she thought, laughing to herself.
"I've been reduced to a paranoid, love sick, idiot crying over a bad dream. If somebody had told me a few years ago that I would be in love and happy about it, I'd have punched them out flat! Look at me know."
Before Isabela had met Hawke, her only concerns in life were booze, booty (both kinds) and living her life to the full, travelling wherever the seas would take her.
She had previously been sold into a loveless marriage by her mother after refusing to convert to the Qun, where she'd been paraded about like some prized goat, and locked away when she wasn't needed.
The day her husband was assassinated was the day Isabela had vowed to never let herself be trapped or tied down ever again, preferring faceless one night stands, leaving as soon as the deed was done.
And then she met Rhea Hawke.
From the moment Isabela had first laid eyes on her, she knew that there was something special about the Ferelden.
She had a certain aura about her that drew people to her. It was in the way she stood, tall and proud, like she could hold her own and then some in a fight. Then there were her eyes, that reminded Isabela of the ocean, just as wild and as fierce, and would change colours depending on her mood. The rogue also had a silver tounge that could give Varric a run for his money, probably could even charm the horns off a Qunari if given half a chance.
Isabela knew she was one of a kind.
At first what they had was strictly physical. There was no denying the two had chemistry, and it was definitely the best sex Isabela had ever had.
Then Hawke had to spoil it all by bringing feelings into it.
Despite the fact that Isabela made it perfectly clear that they would never be anything more, and Hawke stating that she had accepted that, Isabela could see that Hawke had fallen for her.
Much to her shock, Isabela had realized that she too had started to develop...something for Rhea.
She found herself always ensuring she was sat right next to Hawke, always within touching distance, whenever they had drinks with their companions at The Hanged Man.
Each night she was staying just a bit longer at the Hawke Mansion, occasionally just watching Hawke sleep.
Every time she heard Hawke voice her heart would race a little, her day brightening, as she listened to yet another one of Hawke's terrible jokes.
She even went and tried to comfort Hawke, despite normally running away from anything remotely involving feelings, the night Hawke's mother was butchered by that mad man Quentin. Much to her surprise, she sat there with Hawke, holding her while she cried herself into a fitful sleep, then watched over her as demons tormented her dreams.
When Hawke fought and kill the Arishok for her, despite the fact Isabela was partially responsible for the Qunari rampaging through Kirkwall, Isabela knew she had to leave.
The fight had almost killed Hawke, and when Isabela saw the Arishok pierce his blade through the rogue and swung her into the air like a roasted nug on a stick, before Hawke finally landed the killing blow, Isabela had realised how far both of them had fallen.
After staying long enough to ensure Hawke's survival, Isabela caught the first boat out of Kirkwall and spent the next three years trying to forget about Hawke.
But the Ferelden rogue had wormed her way into the pirate's heart, and try as she might, all Isabela could think of was Hawke.
She found herself missing that little smirk that would play across Hawke's face when she found something funny. The sway of Hawke's hips as she walked and the smell of her sweat after a long night.
She missed those eyes that made her feel like she was drowning every time she looked into them, the intensity of their stare whenever Isabela was hurt.
She even missed, Maker forbid, the cheesy jokes she made that had everyone else groaning.
She missed Hawke.
So after three long years, against her better judgment, Isabela found herself back in Kirkwall, where Hawke had accepted her back with open arms, no questions asked.
And now here she was, another two years later, sitting in her ship sailing back to that shit hole Kirkwall, getting giddy at the prospect of seeing Hawke again, who had left on some mission involving The Inquisition, Grey Wardens, and that ass wipe Corypheus.
A couple of months ago, Isabela had returned from a mission to find a hastily scrawled note from Hawke, saying that Corypheus was back and Varric had requested her help, not to worry, she'll be back soon.
Isabela had been furious at first that Hawke had taken off without her. She had heard that Corypheus was back while out on a mission, and Isabela had intended to return to Hawke, grab her and jump on her ship and sail away from this shit storm.
The huge hole in the sky was one thing, but a giant bat shit crazy darkspawn flying around on an Archdemon was a whole another level of crazy.
But Hawke had spoiled her plans by running off to help Varric, and so she was stuck, byding her time doing missions as an 'agent' for the Inquisition, while she waited for word from Hawke.
And finally a letter did arrive, informing her that the Grey Wardens had gone crazy with blood magic, summoning a giant demon army for Corypheus. But not to worry as it all should be sorted soon and to meet her in Kirkwall in a months time.
Isabela couldn't wait. While she wasn't a clingy person, she had missed her Ferelden rogue and she wasn't gonna let her out of her sight for a very long time.
A bang on her cabin door jolted Isabela from her thoughts.
"Captain Isabela ser, we're bout an hours way from Kirkwall," a gruff voice called through the door.
"All right, I'll be up in a bit, have the men set full sail towards the city," Isabela called back through the door.
"Aye Captain."
As she listened to the receding footsteps, Isabela swung her legs over the edge of the bed with a smile.
She was finally going to see Hawke.
An hour later Isabela stood at the bow of her ship, the wind whipping through her hair, as the Kirkwall docks loom into view.
Squinting, the Pirate tried to see if she could spy Hawke on the docks, eyes falling instead on another familiar figure.
With a smirk Isabela headed towards to the centre of the deck yelling orders to her men, eager to be docked and a shore.
"Alright you scurvy bastards, once we're docked you have two weeks shore leave, make sure you get all your needs sorted and satisfied because once we set sail we won't be seeing land for a very long time!"
Once Sirens Call II had docked and all her men had rushed off the ship, eager to spend their spoils, Isabela stepped on to the docks shouting out to the familiar figure that stood, arms crossed, watching the Pirate's every move.
"Guard Captain! Didn't expect the royal welcome from you! Missed me did you?"
"Hello, Isabela," Aveline replied, a small smile appearing on the guard captain's otherwise serious face.
"What!? No mention of a docking permit? You HAVE missed me!" Isabela exlaimed, flinging an arm around Aveline's shoulders.
"I bet Kirkwall's been awfully dull without me and Hawke to liven it up for you!
How's Donnic, still visiting the Rose for advice?"
"Actually, Kirkwall's been quite calm since its been rid of your...influence," Aveline replied with a scowl, detaching herself from the pirate.
"We've been focused on rebuilding the city since the incident with the old Knight Commander. For once everyone's been working together, its a nice change of pace. Though with your return, I'm sure that will change quickly."
"Everybody needs a bit of excitement in their lives, otherwise what's the point in living?" Isabela said with a wink.
"Yes, well, Kirkwall's had more than it's fair share of excitement to last several life times. You better not have turned up here to cause trouble Isabela, because I will have you locked up faster than you can say whore, and this time I WILL throw away the key!" Aveline said, crossing her arms as she glared at the pirate.
"Don't you worry your manly little head about it, Aveline, I'm just here to meet Hawke, and then we will be on our way," laughed Isabela, glancing around again.
"Speaking of Hawke, I don't suppose she's turned up yet has she?"
"I- no. Hawke isn't here."
Aveline glanced away, refusing to meet her eyes.
"How about we go to the Hanged Man? Have a drink for old times sake?"
Isabela spun around, her eyes narrowing in suspicion.
"Why? You've never offered to buy me a drink before."
"Like I said, old times sake. Give us time to catch up before I have to throw you in a cell," Aveline replied before spinning on her heel and started marching off towards Low Town.
"Fine. But your buying. And trust me, its gonna be more than one drink," said Isabela following the Captain, disappointed that Hawke had not yet arrived.
You could smell the place before you saw it, the sickly scent of piss and vomit, blending in with the smell of alcohol and sweat. If you wanted a nice place to go get a drink, then The Hanged Man was not the place for you.
Here the meals were more likely to kill you than feed you, and the alcohol was strong but tasted like the underside of a dead mans foot.
Stepping inside, Isabela felt as though she was being transported back in time.
Nothing had really changed. Dirt and grime still covered everything, from the rickety old chairs to the ale stained tables.
Isabela half expected to so Varric sitting in his usual spot before the fire, a large crowd gathered around him as he told yet another exaggerated story of Hawke's exploits.
Looking for an empty table as Aveline went to order their drinks at the bar, Isabela selected one towards the back, and sat with her back to the wall, eyes to the door, an old habit that had saved her life on more than one occasion.
"Apparently, this is from Coff's 'good stash,'" said Aveline as she sat down, placing two tankards and a large black bottle on the table.
Isabela grabbed the bottle and read the barely legible label aloud.
"Hanged Man Special. You do realise that this is just a mix of all the dregs and left over alcohol from everyone's mugs, right?" she laughed, pulling out the cork and screwing up her nose as a foul oder rushed out.
"Argh. I swear he mixes this shit with rats piss."
"So, no worse than what normally goes into your mouth then," Aveline replied, watching the pirate full their mugs.
"Sorry to disappoint, but nothing but the finest goes past these lips. Just ask Hawke," Isabela replied with a wink, taking a swig of the foul concoction in her cup.
"Drink up Big Girl, then you can tell me why you wanted to have a drink with me so badly."
Aveline picked up her tankard, avoiding Isabela's eyes, grimacing as the drink hit her tounge.
"Maybe I wanted to catch up. It's been two years after all, and after everything we've all been through together and what's happening out there, it's nice to touch base with old friends."
"Aveline, the only time we've had 'catch up' time is when you've thrown me into a cell over simple misunderstandings."
"Enciting a brawn that ends up with rioting though most of Lowtown is not a 'simple misunderstanding.'"
"Details. Victimless details. Now stop stalling. You've got that look about your face that either means you've got something to say, or you're about to read me the riot act, and considering I've barely been in Kirkwall an hour, I'm guessing its the first."
Isabela took another swig of her drink, looking around, seeing more than the usual amount of guards in the pub.
Aveline stared down into her drink taking a deep breath.
"Well, a week ago we got some news-"
"Wait, don't tell me, Donnic's pregnant!"
Aveline said nothing as she scowled at the pirate.
"No? Did he leave you then? I told you that you needed to mix it up a little. If you'd just-"
"Makers breath Isabela, shut your mouth before I shut it for you!"
Isabela raised her eyebrow at Aveline waiting expectantly.
"Well then? Don't keep us in suspense. Let me tell you know, if we're about to have a heart to heart, I'm definitely not drunk enough-"
"Isabela, Hawke's dead."