ME; hey, guys! R&R. I am in a hurry, so toodles!
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto. Never have, never will. Scout's honor. put hand on heart
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Blogging is NOT a crime!: Chapter 1
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Time: 4:56:23 P.M.
Mood: my life sucks
Music: numb, by linkin park (ssooo depressing, if you really listen, you can make it apply to your life…soooo depressing)
My life sucks. Did you notice that I wrote the time military-ily? Yeah, that's how boring my life is. What the hell does P.M. stand for anyway?…never mind. Anyway, I am here to blog, not to ask. My friend, uh…lets call her Blondie, told me to start a blog, and actually informed (big word, big word…right?) me that it helps relieve stress. SO, here we go!
These are my three ways to life:
Good grades/ Good job (You'll be happy to know that I have neither)
Athleticy-ness (Good, but not the best. There's always this one girl who JUST manages to beat me…except for at volleyball and basketball.)
And….(drum roll, please) boys (men are preferred)!!!you know you all want one…unless you're a guy or are a lesbian…no offense to lesbians…I LOVE LESBIANS, JUST DON'T KILL ME! (only applies to gays or straight girls)
And also…ugh. Girls. (lame attempt to cheer) guys, we're cool, right? (Hehehe, not that I'm saying I'm a girl…hehehe)
Whew! Anyhow, my grades? Going down the drain. My Spanish sucks, my history sucks, my English sucks, my Spanish sucks, my speech sucks, my math…ROCKS, actually! I don't know why, but its, like, a stereotype that all Asians rock at math.
OKAY! DAY ONE!
Get up. Fall out of bed. Stumble into bathroom. Take a leak. Put on uniform, Flip hair. Wink at reflection. Practice puckering.(Hottie!) Push W.-Orbs (from now on, I'll just call W.-Orbs Worb) off the bed. And shove. And push. And shove.
REACTION: "Bitch! Get away from me!"
(Wow. Doesn't she love me SO much?) Give up. Get laptop. Find speech. Edit it. Transfer to desktop (SOOOO much trouble). Print. Go to cafeteria. Eat a few barbecue lays. Go to tutorial. In tutorial…NEVER MIND! THIS IS WAAAYYYY TO BORING! Will tell good things about day.
Today, Cuz (A/N: like cousin, not because)talked to me! Actually, he only grunted. Is that even a phrase? But still, he never does that! He is so hot, with his muscular biceps, his hot abs (not that I could see them), his sexy mussed-up long hair (he DOES NOT look like a hippy, okay people?), and his ASS. Oh my god. Actually, no. I cannot bring myself to look at his ass. What if its…its…deformed????!!!! Unfortunately, I can only see Cuz as a sexmate, or a jump-my-bones-I'm-horny mate, not a SOULmate. Depressing thought, isn't it?
Waaahhhhhhh!!!!!! Going to eat fudge.
Comments
Subject: Oooohhh, I likey!
Lesboluver#1: Honey, I love lesbians too, we should get together!
Subject: I don't!
pinkISstrong: Actually, I think I'm good. I'm…uh…already with someone.
Subject: Noooo!
Lesboluver #1: What?! Where's that skank? I'll get rid of her for u, and we can have…good times together. (Hint – I'm really good with my tongue)
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Subject: GET AWAY FROM HIM, YOU BITCH!
LittleMissRed123: Like I said, GET AWAY FROM HIM, YOU BITCH!
Subject: Excuse me?!
pinkISstrong: Get out of my face, you freak. And, anyway, you don't even know who I am talking about.
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Subject: Are you retarded?
Domyeyeslookwhite: it is REALLY obvious who you're talking about.
Subject: Probably.
pinkISstrong: maybe they'll think I slept with neji…not. That would never happen. I wish he would get a clue, and just kiss my lips off or something….Ewwwww!!!! Horrible mental picture!
Subject: Get therapy! Now!
Domyeyeslookwhite: Sometimes, I just don't get you. Now, don't forget, drama auditions at 5 tomorrow! See ya!
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"Sakura!" Hinata calls.
I saunter over, sexily and gracefully. Puckering my lips at hot guys, finger-waving, flipping my hair. I swear, they just love me. Not. Unfortunately, my foot gets caught on somebody's purse strap, and I stumble over, fall onto an acne-covered guys lap, and accidentally slap someone in the face with my nice finger-wave. ("Hey, dude! Watch out!")
When I finally reach Hinata, she sneers, "Nice."
I smack her. Strangely though, Hinata doesn't return the smack. She puts down her head, and just sits there silently.
Weird. Is she okay?
Okay. Today's goal; try not to suck. I always sing in the shower, so I can just pretend the boo's are water. Pft! That's not going to work. I will successfully sneak out! Okay.
1 –
2 –
3 –
Plan in action!!! Charge, woman!
I stealthily sneak out of my seat and slowly creep up the aisle. I reach for the door, pull it open, and – SPLAT! – fall backwards.
"WHAT THE HELL?" I scream. The current girl on stage stops singing, and as I look towards the audience, I swear that I see Hinata rolling her eyes at me.
I quickly pull myself up, plaster on a fake grin, wave (making sure my bangles jangle), and go, "I'm good! Just need to use the restroom!"
Everyone just shake their heads in that oh-my-god-she-always-does-this-she's-so-stupid way, and turn around. Then, I turn my head around (I'm sure I got whiplash) and glare at my tormentor.
Son of a bitch. He's smirking. I will whipe that smirk off of his face. Then, I will-- oooohhhh. HOOOTTTT!!! Burning me!
An older man had walked up behind Mr. McSmirky, who is (sadly-sob, sob.) still a boy and looks at me, melting me with his gaze. I swear my eyes probably turned into hearts.
I push McSmirky aside, and stick out my hand, "Hello! I'm Haruno Sakura. What's your name?" and your number, and your height, and your weight, and also…can I feel your six-pack?
"Hi. I'm Uchiha Itachi. This is my little brother Sasuke."
Whoa. Sasuke McSmirky. I have GOT to write that down.
"Haruno Sakura?" calls out Kurenai-sensei, looking around the room for me.
"Oh! Kurenai-sensei, I'm coming!" I shout back, rather loudly, and dash down the rows. The Hot Brothers sit down in the back.
So, what should I sing? Should I sing depressing, or should I sing happy? Which one? Which one? God, why is life so full of choices? Ugh! Okay, I will…no! I will…No! I will…
"Ano? Sakura-chan? We're waiting."Kurenai-sensei says, not too patiently.
"Okay, sorry. I will sing…Oh. My. God."
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Time: 10:09:46
Mood: Shockalocked. You could slap me and I would go, "Whoa baby, that car goes by fast!" If you don't get it, just…ALSDHFIAPDSPIAHF!
Music: Gone, by Kelly Clarkson. You would totally get it, if you were me.
Okay, so I'm, you know, standing there, about to sing Cry…or Smile, by Lily Allens. I can't seem to remember what the title was. Anyhow, then, my old boyfriend comes in, Noodle-Doodles! (How 'bout ND? Or Doodles? Or Noodles? Send me a message!)
He goes, "Whoa. You got hotter." Dude, come on. I am all for flattery, but aren't parents always going, and I quote, "You should love based on personality, not looks."
I totally agree. Unless, it's me see hot guy, and not hot guy see me. There is a difference, people!
I am totally pissed. Not only that, I charged across the room in anger, and am now in detention. At 10! Fartnockers!
Comments
Subject: You!
nerdygirl098: You're such a hypocrite. Jeez. Get a life.
Subject: Excuse me?
pinkISstrong: You get a life. You're the one who's reading my blog.
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Subject: I think…
blondinblue: I think you should call him doodles.
Subject: Thanks.
pinkISstrong: your vote is appreciated
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Subject: Oooohhh
nuncakiss4free: just how hot?
Subject: On a scale from 1 to 10?
pinkISstrong: about an 8…maybe 9. y?
Subject: I'll tell you
Nuncakiss4free: call him ND Baby
Subject: Uhhh…
pinkISstrong: thanks! That's cute!
Subject: That's what…
Nuncakiss4free: I'm here for.
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Time; 10:52:08
Mood: …uh…well…you see…too stunned for words
Music: none. Just the crickets and me. I am their conductor, and they are my orchestra
I just watched the Pursuit of Happiness…Happyness. Yeah. That is so sad. It made me get drunk to rid my pain. Which is why I am now in the intellectual, go-save-the-world mood, and stunned, as seen in my mood.
I have come to a conclusion about what to do with ND Baby. I will confront him, and bitch-slap him back to England, or wherever the hell he came from. Did I mention that I'm drunk?
The petals on my pink roses are falling. It is really depressing. And the necks of their stems are getting really weak, like a wet banana peel when you bend it too much in a certain spot. I should go party. Actually…that's a pretty good idea. I'll bring my beer.
Party like a rock! Party like a rock..star!
No Comments
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I stumble out of my room, clutching my beer bottle in my hand, and somehow make it to the stairs without totaling anything. I am still in my overlarge shirt and overly-short shorts. I walk down the stairs, and on the last steps, I trip.
Thump!
I land on someone, straddling their hips, my head on their chest. I open my eyes and before I am knocked out, I look up, and see pools of onyx. Drowning me in their depths, the dark orbs hypnotize me asleep.
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The End
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NOTE: hello buggers! R&R! pretty please? With a cherry on top? Or, better yet, any food of your choice?