Summary: Everybody wants a pet.
Standard Disclaimer: I'm just a fanfiction author. All hail the rightful owners.
"I think I might get a hamster." Zack muttered under his breath, staring at a colored-coded Risk board, with Carmen's latest heists marked in yellow and green. Absentmindedly, he moved a piece back and forth across Tahiti. "It would be fun… get a little wheel, some sticks for it to chew on, one of those funny little water bottles with the little metal sphere in the pipe… watch its cheeks puff out when it eats a lot."
"I think that last one's a squirrel." His sister corrected him, from across the room in their family's spacious basement den.
Zack argued. "Naw hamsters do it too. I infoscanned it. "
Raising an eyebrow, Ivy asked. "Wow an infoscan." She teased. "Now we're serious. You really want to get a pet?"
"Yeah." Zack admitted bashfully.
"You should try a rat…" Ivy muttered, not really invested in the conversation. She was trying to make a too-small beanbag chair into a comfortable seat. "We've got some down in forensics at work. You could keep it in your room and I bet it wouldn't even look out of place."
"No way." Zack said decisively, trying to figure out how to fit seven markers on New York City.
"You're a little picky for someone who befriends the local pigeons." Ivy ribbed.
"Hey," Raising his arms, Zack protested. "We gotta organize. Hamsters are for looking cute and owning as pets. Rats are for testing chemicals on and not getting attached to." He considered Guatemala for a moment, before deciding that red herrings should have their own color and marking the spot in blue.
Ivy grimaced, as she fell off the seat again onto the concrete floor of their basement. "They're basically the same thing."
Zack reclined back in his wheeled chair and glided across the floor. "Nope. Also don't like cows or chickens sis. If it's likely to end up as dinner, I don't make friends with it in the first place." He grinned. "Easy. Just have a special category for things that go with ketchup."
"That's an… interesting philosophy." Ivy mused, noticing that she was suddenly craving a big helping of steak-frites. Even her meals seemed to be getting morally ambiguous lately.
"You're should try it." Spinning around in a circle, Zack put his elbows back on the board and plopped a game piece down in Austria.
"I'm a little far gone." Ivy muttered.
Zack laughed. "Nice try sis but we all know how much you like your McNuggets."
"Yeah that wasn't what I was thinking of…" Ivy remarked in a slightly arid tone. "But while we're on the subject, the next person who tries to get me to read The Jungle…"
Zack threw up his hands. "I get it! One time mistake." He wasn't even going to touch Supersize Me. Never disillusion a carnivore.
With a cheerful laugh, Ivy decided to let it alone. "So, what's up with using the Risk board as a Carmen map, anyhow, little bro? Getting sick of your favorite game?"
"Yeah. Because the whole everything determined by dice thing is boring. " Zack said in somewhat exasperated tone. "I'm into Diplomacy now. Have been for a year and a half… Don't you pay attention?"
"Eh…" Ivy muttered. "I don't really like Diplomacy."
"Really?" Zack said. "But it's awesome!"
"Yeah but every time I play it," Ivy muttered, finally giving up on the beanbag chair and standing up. "I end up noticing that if Carmen were playing along she'd be owning all of us."
"Totally!" Zack exclaimed, grinning widely. "And it would be so cool!"
Ivy grunted. "Yeah, but I kind of want to forget about Carmen on my day off. Especially if she's winning."
"Suit yourself." Zack muttered, looking at one of the game countries. "I think Carmen might be about due to hit Madagascar."
Ivy stared at the map for a moment and then cracked a smile. "Cool. Lemurs."
"See!" Zack announced triumphantly. "I knew I'm not the only one who feels like we need a cute animal around here. Especially since Stretch got transferred to narcotics."
"True." Ivy glanced at the board, then found herself a seat, this time not full of plastic grain, and put her feet up. "But I think I'd skip the hamster part, go straight to a cat."
Happily, Zack suggested. "Why don't you? I mean it's not like mom can claim you're not responsible, she's been letting you go to Australia on school nights since you were twelve. "
"Well…" The redhead mused, a little too casually, "Because I don't know if I can take a cat with me when I go away next year. I don't think the apartment allows it."
For the first time that night, Zack attention completely left the board. "Huh? Did you get offered a new job or something?"
Ivy took a deep breath. "Yeah."
The younger sibling clicked his teeth. "Then how'll you work at the agency? Aren't you going to do the Acme thing part time? C5 in, maybe?"
Not making eye contact, his sister answered softly. "Nope."
"But… who'll chase Carmen with me?"
Ivy sighed. "I don't know. Tatiana maybe?" She didn't mean for it to come out sarcastic, but it had a little bit of an edge.
Zack swallowed. "Don't you think Carmen would miss you though?" Carmen and everyone else….
With a small frown for the game board, Ivy remarked. "Carmen doesn't own me, Zack."
Awkward silence filled the strategy room, as the two siblings frowned at the game. Finally, Zack broke the impasse. "Hey sis?"
"What?"
Zack grinned. "I would totally cat sit for you?"
"Ok." Ivy answered, with a slow smile. "But I think if you pet sit for years it basically means the cat is yours."
"No problem, sis." Zack declared. "I'm down to own a cat."
"You know that includes cleaning the litter box right."
"Oh… rats."
"Exactly."
