Once upon a day there was some shit goin down. The group of heterosexual magical men challenged the group of totally gay sword wielding girls. The asexual pop idol dance group said fuck that and went home so they're no in this story.
Anyway let's get back to the story.
This old man walked down the street and I don't mean just walked. This Sauvé ass motherfucking 99 year old man galloped in strides. This strides could seriously walk across a bridge of fabulous T-rex in one step. The old made had so much swag he didn't even need to breathe. Air? fuck that shit. Air is for the swagless.
This man. He was the reason for the challenge between the heterosexual magical men and the group of totally gay sword wielding girls. The heterosexual magic men saw his swagger and deemed it too much for the world.
"Swag that abundant can ruin the economy!" The beautiful heterosexual Stock broker of the heterosexual magical men roared.
"and what if we fail?" The bitch baby of the heterosexual magical men whined with great concern. This fucker could make dropping a glass of milk sound like the world was imploding into it's hot melty core.
The totally gay elf of the heterosexual magical men group frowned with the intensity of a thousand suns. His frown was so severe that the frown was undoable. He was going to be a very sad looking gay heterosexual elf forever. "We have to try. FOR THE SAKE OF ALL THAT IS ANIME!"
Heterosexual magical man 4 and Heterosexual magical man 5 agreed cuz they were kiss asses.
"Not so fast!" A voice with the sound of many screeching falcons pierced the vial of magical men. They fell to their knees in great dismay. But not really. Just the bitch baby did, that little fucker.
The group of heterosexual magical men looked to find the source of such a voice. It was then that they saw women of all shapes and sizes standing on a great grand bus. Seriously one of the girls was like 2 feet tall and looked like a triangle.
"Who go there?" The beautiful heterosexual Stock broker of the heterosexual magical men grew 10 feet with confusion.
The girl with the voice of many screeching falcons achieved a new skill, growing 12 more arms to combat the man's growing height. "It is us, the group of totally gay sword wielding girls. And we demand you stop. This man is ours to fight."
It was then that one of the totally gay sword wielding girls spoke out with fright. Her hair arose with greatness and smelled of cheese. "You two must stop! You will become a noodle and you more arms that women!"
The swag 99 year old man laughed while petting many dog. So far he is winning.
To be continued.