And I hate how much I love you
I can't stand how much I need you
And I hate how much I love you
But I just cant let you go
And I hate that I love you so…
-Hate that I love you, Rihanna & Ne-yo
**I don't own these characters. They belong to DC.. If they belonged to me.. Do you think I would be sitting here writing this? No! I would be on a beach in Hawaii.**
It was all like a dream. Something techno-colored and unreal. One moment Arkham asylum was all she had ever known. The padded cells and dull halls had been something of a security net, as everything faded into the shades of white, and the often multi colored candy that the aliens with three eyes would give her. That was her life. A butterfly stuck in a strait-jacket cocoon. Sometimes she would cry, but the reverberating sounds would lull her into restless sleep, where green glass and purple bubbles pulled her through half formed memories of pain.
It was just another dream. Just another black form in the darkness, just another demon who took her away to different levels of the insane. That was her life, until Batman rescued her. The one evil figure in her nightmares that served a purpose in the dream.
It was just another dream when he bore her on silver wings to a mountain on a lake of glass. Just another wistful dream when the masked figure released her arms and laid her on a real bed. Her delicate fingers traced his face as her eyes floated in and out of focus, the fuzzy edges creating little monsters beside and above her. She reached out, brushing the side of his face in the attempt to grab one of the black masses and his eyes softened slightly under the sharp mask.
"Don't worry; you will be free of those demons soon." The gruff voice called to her, floating again across that solid lake, the purple lights around her head catching more of her attention then that voice.
"Are you here to bring the muffins, Mr. Alien?" She asked, her words slightly slurred together. "Because you know how the fox likes to steal them if you don't bring them inside from playing.. 1, 7, 3,… What comes after three? Is it 5? I really don't recall.." She trailed off again. Nothing mattered but the purple lights, until something sharp pierced her arm.
"I don't like that much Mr. Walrus." She addressed batman again, knowing from that drugged feeling that this had to be a dream. People only shot her up with drugs in her dreams.. Those fleeting moments when she remembered a time that was meant to be long forgotten. It was a different kind of haze clouding her vision now. It was almost colored, like all of those bubbles and water in her dreams. Nothing made sense anymore, but that didn't matter, because she never remembered anything making sense. As the red hue continued to take over the blurry image of her rescuer, she started talking again. Just mumbled nothings here and there, but over time she was able to make words again, and her lips moved of their own volition, creating a response that she never knew the question for.
"Subject 13. Adrian Miles. Project number 39495." The voice that came from her mouth wasn't the same, dreamy tone that she had been using before, but harder. As though a robot had taken over her vocal patterns. Batman smiled slightly at it, a note of triumph behind his mask now, replacing the care that had been there before. There was only room for one emotion at a time in his eyes, and right now concern wasn't high on the list.
Right after the words had left her mouth, she cringed, throwing her hands over her face and screamed, "Don't bring the scarecrow! I don't know! I can't remember who the bee stung…"
#
The scream had not only been heard by Batman. Connor Kent sat, bolt upright as if the cry had been right in his ear. For a second he thought that it had just been a very real aspect of the strange dream he had been having, but a strangled laugher coming from down the hall made him assume that the scream had been real. Or, he was still dreaming. The logical part of his brained betrayed him though, calculating that it was probably real, and that his chances of going back to sleep were less than zero.
With one final sigh, he swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood in one fluid motion, strong muscles flexing beneath the T-shirt that he had forgotten to take off the night before. In this state of exhaustion, he really didn't care what was happening to the owner of the scream, as long as they would stop. Part of his brain was still holding fast to the belief that it was all just a vivid dream, and that he didn't have to try to move fast in this state of lethargy.
Finding Robin and M'gann creeping along the hall when he opened his door shocked him into a better state of wakefulness, and the part of his brain that was closest to a human kicked himself for being so cold to whoever was in obvious agony.. Still part of him just wanted to go back to sleep. Motioning for them to be quiet, he joined them, creeping down the hall with his hands close to his sides, trying not to make a sound as they closed in on their target room.
#
She was laughing again, and Batman made no attempt to silence her. If her screams hadn't woken up the entire mountain, he needed to fire them all from the Young Justice. The child would have been able to wake a dead man if she had wanted too.
"Just a little longer." He whispered, "Then your mind will be free again."
"Wheeeeeeeeeeee!" She exclaimed, throwing her hands over her head and gesturing wildly at the blobs that weren't there. Then, in the same moment, she dropped her hands, looked at Batman for the first time with some sort of recognition, and passed out, her whole body slumping down.
"Sleep." Batman whispered kindly as three pajama clad teenagers broke into the room, tired and battle ready.. Kind of.
"Stand down." Batman ordered, watching them all take a moment to comprehend and another to relax enough to listen.
"Batman?" Robin questioned, something not clicking in his brain as he stared slightly dumbfounded at his mentor.
M'gann wasn't firing on all cylinders ether, because she stared at him as well until she hit herself forcefully on the fore-head. "Heeellloooo Megan! This is the closest Justice base to Gotham, so of course Batman would stop here if he needed help!" Then she looked puzzled again. "But.. You didn't scream.. Did you?" She asked him, slightly bashful as she broke eye contact with the older hero.
"No, she did." Connor said, pointing to the girl now fast asleep on one of the bases empty beds. "Who is she?" He asked, slightly accusing Batman of some horrible evil with his eyes, as if he had been the creature who was tormenting this girl.
"Her name is Adrian.. And she has been a prisoner of Arkham insane asylum for the past 10 years."
"So.. She's crazy?" M'gann asked quietly.
"No." Batman looked sternly at all of them. "She's quite sane.. Well, as sane as you can be when your whole life has been torture and then forced insanity. She has been given a steady dose of cortaniphan."
Robin's brain finally fell into place as he uttered a quiet "Shit.."
"Exactly." Batman continued, not thinking of reprimanding Robin for the language. "I just gave her the counter agent. It should take a good twenty minutes for her body to disperse it, then she will have to be awake for the rest of the process.. Unfortunately. You might want to inform Kaldur, Artemis, and Kid Flash that there is.. Going to be a lot of noise tonight. She is going to have to relive some painful memories, and it's not going to be pretty."
"I'll go tell them." M'gann offered turning and stumbling slightly as she left the room. Robin and Connor stayed, waiting for instructions.
"I have some business I have to attend to. I will be back in the morning if you two can watch her? She's not dangerous.. Per se'."
"Per se'? Robin asked, eyeing her carefully.
Batman actually chuckled. "She's a telepath, pusher, and has strong telekinetic powers.. Let's just say she could beat the x-men's professor without much effort."
#
"Is that why they were making her.. You know, crazy?" Robin moved past Batman, stopping when he was standing beside the girl, lying in such a funny position on the bed. It looked like she was trying to make herself into an L, with her body only bent at the waist. He was going to ask Batman why she was sleeping like that until it occurred to him that she was prolly use to sleeping upright. Hot anger boiled inside his chest instantly, and he was ready to storm the asylum with nothing but his pajamas. Wrestling with this sudden urge, he shoved his hands into his pockets, trying to concentrate on something else.
What the hell was that?
Batman started to leave, but he turned slightly when Connor asked, "Wait, what is a pusher?"
"A pusher is someone who can push thoughts, ideas, or images into another person's mind. It's the ultimate form of coercion. I've seen pushers make people kill themselves, and I've seen them torture with only their minds.. They are not someone you want to mess with, because they usually like to play games. Like, they don't just tell you to 'shoot yourself' they say 'trust me, just pull the trigger.' And when you resist they say, 'you unloaded it an hour ago.. Don't you remember?' Then, they fill your mind with the 'memory' of unloading your gun, so you pull the trigger and… BAM!" Robin started talking and couldn't stop, his words overflowing as he continued to stare at the girl.
Connor's eyes hardened. "Doesn't sound like someone I would want to rescue."
"Nono!" Robin protested as Batman slipped away. "That was a description of a bad pusher. Good pushers can take others pain, protect their friends minds so that nothing can get at them.. And god can they create some beautiful images if they want. I got to see whole other worlds once because of a pusher that Batman once knew.." Finally noticing that he was talking too much, Robin stopped, contenting himself with looking at the girl.
#
Slightly calmed by Robins second description, Connor walked over to the other side of the bed, kneeling down till he could rest his head against the night stand. His torso was so long that he could still see the girl well, even though he was comfortably seated on the floor. She was very pretty, he had to admit, but something about her screamed frail to him. Maybe it was the fact that her hair was shocking white, and that it matched her alabaster skin almost shade for shade. Or, it could have been that she seemed slightly too skinny in some places, and still curvy and beautiful in others. She should have been someone he would shy away from, just another thing that would bring back his own torture in the name of science. But something drew him too her. He wanted to pick her up and hold her to him; he wanted to ride out her traumatic rollercoaster back to sanity.
But then the feeling was gone. She was just a person, lying unconscious across the bed. He shook his head, trying to dissect the unusual sensations that had just coursed through his mind and body simultainiously.
What the fuck..
He caught Robins gaze but dropped the connection quickly, recognizing a wistful look in the younger boy's eye that he had a feeling had just been in his. When he looked up again, Robin's face was mirroring his feeling of unease. What was going on?
Connor couldn't stand to be messed with. After everything that had happened with Cadmus, anything and everything to do with mind control, or even "suggestion" bothered him. Your mind should be a normal, safe place.. But normal was all too often more than they could ask for.
#
The first thing she registered was the beautiful boy, sitting beside her bed. The next thing she realized was that there was another, albeit younger boy on her other side. Something made her scared, and she forced her eyes to stay shut a moment longer before she faced them. Something clicked enough in her mind however to tell her that the older boy had not been fooled by her ruse. His heart rate had quickened the moment that she gained continuous knowledge of the room around her, and now she could feel his eyes on her face… Searching.
"She's awake." He stated, his voice not quite as comforting as she thought it would be. It was harsher, rougher, with some sort of false layers of adequate emotions laced threw them. She couldn't have that. For how beautiful he was, he needed to let his voice go a bit more. But she was afraid. That tone of voice usually belonged to the people who had no emotions, and suddenly she felt that stinging pain in her arm again.
"No!" She screamed, rolling over on the bed, but not moving much besides her mouth. "I can't! Don't make me.. Not anymore.." Her screamed trailed off into wails, which subsided again into agonizing mutterings. It took a second for her to recognize it, but she could feel the younger boy holding her hand, stroking the back of it slightly in slow, soothing motions.
It felt good for a second, till the muscle memory brought back floods of iridescent colors and sounds.. Loud sounds that made her head want to explode.
"Don't touch me!" She yelled into his mind, and he jumped back instantly dropping her had and severing the ties to her forgotten memories. She could see the shock and pain in his eyes as the room faded in and out of focus, but at this point, she didn't care. She had to make it stop.. Had to make it end.
"He said the world would light up.. Like Christmas.." She whispered one or two more broken and incomprehensible ideas before passing out, and dying to the world once more.
Because as you know, this was just another dream.
#
(I hope you liked chapter 1! Please comment and/or message me to tell me if your actually reading this x.x)